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WEDN THE CALL SPEAKS FOR ALL. e e b o i s The Bayard roast is going on over a slow fire. There is lots of use for the cathode ray in politics. Censuring Bayard is all well enough, but how about Cleveland ? Harrison is no longer a receptive candi- date, but there are plenty left. The Cuban war seems more like a game of hide and seek than a real fight. It is now Cleveland’s turn to explain himself and put an end to the third-term conundrum. The Senate never hurries, and yet the Senators always seem heated when they arrive anywhere. Guaranteeing the excellence of Cali- fornia fruit is the surest way of getting a guaranteed mark: Little by little and turn by turn Salis- bury, Chamberlain and Balfour are un- twisting the lion’s tail: It is always well to remember that San ¥rancisco kas other things to do besides fighting the refunding scheme. Kansas was thirty-five years old last month and is still flirting with everything in sight and wedded to nothing. ‘While Japan is building warships China is building railroads, and in the next war the result will probably be different. igns for the build- ings of the affiliated colleges are so- good it is a pity there were not more of them. Democratic dark horses have the satis- faction of knowing that they are not any more in the dark than the rest of the party. Democracy will certainly find a Presi- dential candidate after a time, for it is making a very fine-tooth comb seargh for him. There is room in San Francisco for all sorts of political improvements this year, but non-partisan schemes are not improve- ments. The Spaniards are said to hold one rail- road line in Cubs, ana on that basis they may still claim to have something of a monopoly in the island. The tally of victories and defeats be- tween the Cubans and the Spaniards is harder to keep than a New Year's resolu- . tion and not half so exciting. ‘ D No matter what kind of political reform is desired it can be obtained more promptly and more effectively by straight politics than by any other way. According to the treasury statement the per capita circulation of the country is $22.47, but there are a good many people who have not even the 47 cents. The Senate should so manage it as to blend the Monroe doctrine, Pan-American- §sm and reciprocity into a single policy end name it after James G. Blaine, With one hand kept busy in Frankfort and the other fighting for life at Washing- ton, it is no wonder Huntington feels a feen aesire to sit down on California. There are said to be 100 advocates of free silver coinage in the House, which is just enough not to be enough to make it ‘worth while to have a vote on the subject. ‘While we are trying to wipe the monop- oly off the State, Chinatown is removing itself from the City, and 1t begins to look’ as if things would be clean all round after & while. . Now that a philosopher has arisen to declare that women should not be edu- cated we may expect one to maintain that dress reform ought to take the shape of a straight jacket. < The Right Honorable Arthur Balfour, First Lord of the Treasury, wishes a British alliance with the United States, which of course is equivalent to saying he wants the earth, - Down, down, down goes the gold reserve, and still the Democrats and Populists in the Senate refuse to assist in passing the emergency tariff bill that would restore the needed revenue: If Cleveland withholds much longer the report of the Government commission on the Nicaragna canal, Congress should draw up a polite note of request for it and hand it to him on a sharp stick. Tt is strange that some members of Con- gress should regard the report of Bayard’s threatened resignation ss an attempt to bulldoze the House. Such a threat is not sufficient to scare even a cuckoo. Huntington boasted once he could never be tracked in business by the quarters he had dropped, but his course in politics could probably be traced by the dollars he put up, if a searchlight turned on. 1f the Senate debate on the Monroe doc- trine resolutions is held in executive ses- sion a great deal of perfervid oratory will be lost. Shutting out the public shuts up the mouth of mapy an eloquent statesman. In declining to bea candidate for renom- nation to the Presidency Harrison shows a full appreciation of the traditions of American politics. - Having been twice honored with the nomination by his party it is right and proper he should now give way to others, y SALISBURY'S POLICY. The speeches recently delivered by Salis- bury, Chamberlain, Balfour and one or two minor members of the British Cabinet are more notable for what they suggest than for what was directly stated. In express terms they vaunted the power of England in her isolation and hurled defiance at her foes, but they suggested an eager willing- ness to make alliances with almost any first-class power and upon almost any terms. "The purpose of all the speeches seems to have been not merely to allay the war scare and prevent anything like a financial panic, but to prepare the country for the submission to Parliament by the Cabinet of a scheme of foreign policy involving a radical change from that which has been pursued in the past. It seems clear from what has been said by the Prime Minister and the ablest of his colleagues, that Great Britain will no longer oppose the coloniat expansion of other nations, particularly of France and Russia, but will try by conciliating them to obtain the support of these strong powers in carrying out her own schemes of aggrandizement in differ-. ent parts of the world. 1t has been plainly stated that the pres- ent Cabimet has no objection to further French conquests in Siam or even t6 an advance of Russia into China far enough south at any.rate 10 obtain a Pacific port that would be free from ice all the year round. Clear and emphatic have been the declarations also that if the United States would eonsent to an alliance, Great Britain would be willing to meet her more than half way. In fact a portion of Balfour's latest speech was almost a special plea for what he called an Anglo-Saxon alliance by which all the English-speaking countries of the world were to be united for the pur- pose of carrying out what the orator called “the duty with which providence has in- trusted us.” The suggested Anglo-Saxon alliance is, of course, out of the question. It is not even a debatable proposition. Whatever chestnuts in the way of colonial posses- sions providence may have designed for Great Britain, it has not intrusted us with the duty of raking them out of the fire. The offers to France and Russia, however, are full of wonderful possibilities. If the three most aggressive pewers on the globe should manage to reach an agreement thereé is no telling to what extent the map of the world may be altered in the next few years. The empire of China, as well as that of Turkey, may be dismembered and divided and the colonies of the weaker powers crowaed out of Africato make way for the domin ant three. ‘While such an alliance is improbable owing to the conflicting interests of the three powers, it 1s still possible, and it js evident the Salisbury Cabinet is willing to grant much to bring it about. Great Britain has discovered her isolation and is doing her best to ‘overcome it. A new move is imminent on the chessboard of diplomacy and the conditions next month may prove to be almost a revolution in in- ternational affairs. CHINATOWN DISSOLVING. It did not require the Rev: F. J. Masters, who knows what he is talking about, to assure us that Chinatown has lost at least 10,000 of its population within the last | eleven years. If this were not sufficient | the evident intention of the Chinese prop- | erty-owners to borrow all they canon their | property and then abandon it, and the re- | fusal of many of the banks to lend on that security would be amply convineing. The exclusion laws passed by Congress explain the situation to a considerable ex- | tent, but other causes have contributed. | One of theém, the value of which is likely | to be overlooked, is that the clannishness | of the Chinese and their absolute holding | aloof from American customs and affilia- | tion indicate a wonderfully strong love of their native couniry and a desire to return to it as soon as'possible. Many of the men | here left parents in China, and their filial | affection is probably stronger than in any | other race. Besides that, what would be a bagatelle in America is a princely fortune in China. A Chinaman owning $500 in this country changes it to- Mexican silver coin before going home, and that means he lands on | his native soil with about $900. This is sufficient to support him and his family 1 comfort without hard exertion. A Chi nese who earns $25a month in this coun- try can save nearly $250 a year above his | living expenses. Out of this he has to re- imburse the company which advanced him his passage money-hither, and sub- mit to certain extortions and blackmail, besides contributing to the support ‘of the secret society to which he belongs, and whose main purpose is to prevent the operation of our laws. All in all, a Chi- nese can generally save sufficient in five or six years to establish himself as a rich man in China. When he returns the-ex- clusion laws prevent others from taking his place. The scattering diabolical murders of employers which Chinese have committed have made many persons afraid to employ them. At the same time the thinning of the Chinese ranks and the increase in the number of white persons seeking employ- ment have raised Chinese wages. reduced those of white persons and thus naturally operated to the supplanting of Chinese with white workers. A gratifying consid- eration is the fact that the constant work of organized white laborers to supplant all the demands for labor have been a very important factor in the case. Chinatown has been doomed for some time. Its decay henceforth will proceed as rapidly as is possible in ‘the dissolution of so great a body. Portsmouth Square in time will be surrounded with handsome structures, and lower Kearny street and Montgomery avenue will: become impor- tant business thoroughfares, forming the natural link between North Beach and Market street. LOOAL MUSICAL TASTES. The charge that the large audience as- sembled to greet the Tavary Opera Com- pany on its opening night contained but a very meager number of “our best people’ should be in all fairness considered in connection with the fact that on that evening fashionable society had a prior engagement in the shape of a splendid wedding in a fashionable church. That fact in nowise diminishes the credit due the foreign population for turning out in so generous numbers to greet ' the distin- guished singers. Exhibitiens ol a musical taste by our best people bhave a complex character. For instance, when Scheel’s Orchestra, a good band of musicians, who could play symphonies as well as Souza’s marches— such a band may be seen in any of the great beer gardens of the Continental cities of Europe—was forced to quit because of a lack of attendance, concerts by favorite local musicians nearly always have crowd- ed audiences. Whether this may be accounted for on the assumption that these last-named entertainments are re- garded in the light of what some of us have the easy but incorrect fashion of calling a ‘*function,” or whether excel- {lently rendered music of the chamber | order happens to be more popular here than heavy concerts, is a matter for special- ists to determine. It can hardly be denied that when & certain concert, of whatever kind, is deemed the proper thing, it inva- riably is largely attended. Nothing more instructive to a student of human nature can be found than the at- tendance at the park concerts on Sundays. These are free, and if the day is fair the number of persons present may run to 5000 or 10,000. It is pleasing to obterve with what silence and pleasure they listen, and how patiently they keep awkward po- sitions when good seats are not obtainable, and it is instructive to note how marked 1s the,absence of those who know what the correct thing is. Probably this is explain- able on the ground that persons of means have opportunities for hearing good music (for that at the park is exceedingly good) which are denied others. Although this separation of what we unfortunately call ‘‘classes” is universal in the United Statesand England, it is not so common in European cities, where the boulevards and beer gardens are visited by. all classes. A difference in Sunday cus- toms largely explains the matter. As a rule, San Franciscans of the wealth- ier kind are appreciative of opportunities to hear good music, but they demand it under the most agreeable conditions. Patti, Isaye, Madame Tavary and many others can give testimony to the fact, and the hopeful ‘outlook for the newly organ- ized Ban Francisco Symphony Orchestra adds a graceful finish to the picture. OVERHAULING LAND FRAUDS. Three separate and unlike movements have been started almost simultaneously to overhaul iand titles in California and protect the public domain. The first, with which the public is now familiar, is the series of bills presented in Congress by the California Miners’ Association for tLe pur- pose of preventing the ‘patenting of min- eral lands to the railroad as agricultural. The second is the suit just filed by B. F. Bergin on behalf of the Attorney-General of the United States to set aside titles fraudulently obtained to 27,000 acres of redwood timber land in Humboldt County. The third comes in the form of a petition from Zach Montgomery to the President and Congress, praying for an investigation.of the titles to many of the largest and richest bodies of land held from Sacramento to San Diego under grants from the Mexican and. Spanish governments. The Humboldt suit is exceedingly im- portant, not alone by reason of its in- trinsic merits, but also because it assails a condition that by no means is confined- to Humboldt. It has been notorious for years that valuable timber lands in the Sierras also were secured by rich corpora- tions through dummies. The greater part of the valuable Government timber lands of the State have been lost to the people through these fraudulent entries, in which there is every reason to believe the local Government officers connived. The Montgomery petition is a more ex- traordinary affair, and 1if considered by Congress at all will undoubtedly be reviewed with great caution. It shows in an elaborate presentation lowing ~ alleged facts: That the value of the Spanish grant lands held ille- domain is $250,000,000, comprising some of the most valuabie agricuitural lands in the State; that the commission created by the act of March 3. 1851, for 1nquiring into the claims to Mexican land grants, ex- ceeded its jurisdiction 1n many cases, set- tling titles which it had no authority un- der the actto examine; that in. the con- firmation the terms of the act were vio- lated in allotting a greater acreage that ihe. Mexiean granting law warranted; that the surveys made by the Government officers were absolutely fictitious and fraudulent; that fraud, deceit, perjury and bribery ran through the whole business, and that they were all practiced in the interest of | wealthy owners and to the harassing and damage of poor claimants. . Not one of these three attacks upon land titles—except inferentially, perhaps, that made by Mr. Montgomery—comes within the category of actions which sometimes operate to alarm .present owners, cast a cloud on their titles and induce them to buy quitclaim deeds. The best policy of the State is to defend existing titles which are reguiar on their face, otherwise extor- tion schemes which have been so profitable in the past might be of endless recurrence, and California has suffered too much in that way for her people to regardr with favor anything that looks like an attempt to revive them. ‘PERSONAL. Ulysses 8. Gast of'St. Louis is at the Palace. Cecil W. Ernst of Oregon arrived here yester- day. 2 A. C. Tonsey, 8 business man of Tacoma, isin town. A. Ritchel, & business man of Sonora, is at the Russ. i Henry Fowler, the hotel proprietor of Napa, is in the City. Ex-Senator J. W. Seawell of Healdsburg is registered at the Russ. H. H. Porter, an attorney of Sacramento, is here on a’business trip. 8. T. Godbe, the oid-time business man of Selt Lake, is at the Grand. C. A. Beeton, & large landowner of Winlock, Wash., arrived here yesterday. N. W. Calkins and W. T. Jones of Melbourne, Australia, are at the Occideatal. Among the arrivals at the Russ is C. H. Brown, a business man of Sacramento. Dr. J. R. White, who has been for some years residing at Redlands, arrived here last night. Robert M. Clark of Carson, ex-Attorney-Gen- eral of Nevada, arrived here yesterday for a brief stay. Louis Deen, a wealthy cattle-grower of Reno, Nev., who has been long engaged in the busi- ness, is at the Russ. | The San Francisco Music sud Drama an- nounces that Maggie Moore will return from Australia within the next few months. Frank H. Short, long editor and one of the leading owners of the Fresno Daily Repub- lican, arrived here yesterday and is at the Palace. H. A. Unrah of Arcadis, manager of E.J. Baldwin’s Santa Anita ranch and who has 'a general supervision over the millionaire’s other property, arrived from the south yes. terday and is at the Baldwin. Henry Rives Ellis, the mining expert and mineralogist, has returned from a six months’ ‘tyip to Utah, where he has been experting mining claims and looking into the reduction of ores through a process of his own invention. Mrs. Cora Urquhart Potter and Mr. Bellew have been engaged for an extensive tour of Australia and New Zealand by Williamson & Musgrove, and the brilliant actress will spend a short time in Oakland with her parents when she comes to this coa¥t en route, and it is quite likely that she may be seen here in her favorite roles.—Music and Drama. CALIFORNIANS IN NEW YORK. NEW YORK, N.Y., Feb. 4.—Among recent arrivals: E. Maguin, Mrs, I. Maguin, Marlbo- rough; Mrs. B.W. Paulsen, Astor; R. A. Put- nem, Continental; J. M. Wilson, Everett; R. Kennedy, Imperial; T. H. Blendell, St. Cloud; H. Norman, Warwick. - : —_— He Understood. —“ Do you understand,” asked the Sabbath-school teacher, “what is meant when we say that time shall be no more?” “Yes'm,” answered Tommy. “It means when the clock stops.”—Indianapolis Journal, the fol-| gally and reconvertible to the public | AROUND THE- CORRIDORS. Editor George Nixon of the Winnemucea Sil- ver State is down from Nevada, dressed in his best suit of clothes, He arose from his couch in the Palace Hotel yesterday morning, some- what earlier than usuel, in the hope of being able to find some one with-whom to discuss the silver question. The white metal has no more George Nixom: Talks Silver. [Sketched from life by & *“ Call” artist.) stanch or perpetual champion than the editor of the Bilver State. He talks silver in his sleep, and does a great deal of sleeping—that is, after the campaign is over; but just before election his journal gets out an evening edition and a morning edition, and the editor never retires until the last ballot is counted. But, to continue, and find some one for Mr. Nixon to talk silver with, He crossed the cour- til, walked into the billiard-room, around ' the grill, out into the courtil again and presently spotted a 8an Francisco friend. They clutched ut each other’s hands and retired to a corner to have it out. “George, yowre looking pretty slick. How do you mansage to keep up such a good fromt in Nevada?” said the editor’s friend, in a ban- tering way. “Probably because you San Francisco people have conciuded to let up on us & while.” “What have we got to do with you'Nevadans, anyhow, I'd like to know?” inquired the San Franciscan, looking across the table in an in- quiring way. “Everything,”said Nixon, taking & long pull at his cigar. “We built your town.” “What?” exclaimed the City man, bringing his feet down from the opposite chair with a bang. “Nixon, you're crazy.” “That’s what I sald. Waita minute and I'll give you a brief summary of how we started San Franecisco in business. In the first place ! when we hed free colnage and siiver was ona par with—" “Oh, rats, George. There you go on the silver question again,” < “Well, I propose to sti¢k toit,” remarked Mr. Nixon, tapping his left hand violently with the finger of his right. “When silVer was on a par with gold at the true ratio of sixteen to one, and the Comstock mines were run- ning full blast there were about five men ris- ing from millionaires to multi-millionaires who were sinking their money in California and particularly San Francisco. Oneof them was the founder of the fortune that built this hotel and bought that inlaid table now being adorned by your native son feet. Look at the Board of Trade, the Mills building, the Stock Exchange, the Wenban block, the Fair build- ing, the Flood building, the California Theater, the Nevada block and ell the best buildings in this City. They were all built with Nevada silver, and your beef comesfrom Nevadaand all the decent butter and cheese on your table is produced in Nevada. There are hundreds of homes all along the swell streets in San Fran- cisco that were put up and furnished with Ne- vada gold andsilver. I tell you this harbog would be nothing like it is now were it not for the fact of Nevada's being the adjoining State. Silver has done it, and silver will double the size of the town and the population of the Pacific Coast. Get your feet off that table and come to breakfast with me. We will haye some Nevada tenderloins and fresh Nevada creamery butter and T’ll pay the bill in silyer even if it is as long as the funding bili protest.” WAR AND NEUTRALITY. Until the state of war arises the condition of neutrality does notexist. Neutrality is a cor- relative of the state of war. When war, and consequently nentrality, arise—and they, arise together, the one as the consequence and im- plication of the other—then the law of nations also becomes operative. The character of con- traband or otherwise attaches to goods, rights of seizure accrue to the belligerents, the state of neutrality attaches to other nations, and along with the state those certain duties, privileges and responsibilities that are inci- dent to it. Prior to the existance of a stateof war and of neutrality. the only obligations resting upon nations are those imposed by thelr own municipal laws. They are bound io enforce these as a seli-imposed obligatien. If they willfully neglect to do o a friendly nation suffering througn such neglect would havea moral claim to indemnity. I# some instances this claim might derive support from the lan- guage of treaties. = These elementary propositions are not-with- out their bearing on the resolution adopted by the United States Senate looking to a virtual demand upon Spain to affirm the status of her operations in Cuba. The position of the United States s a friendly power is becoming intolerable. They nave the moral right to in- sist upon belng put in the position of neutrals, to which will attach certain clearly defined rights and duties. 1f Spain is engaged in a 'WAT property conmqu of waris subject to rightful seizure on the high seas, and neutral vessels on the high seas may rightfully be overhauled for the purpose of ascertaining the character of the cargo. in is not atwar, but is engaged in no more than the policé per- formance of repressing domestic disorder, it follows that she possessesno such rights on the high seas. + While citizens of this country offend against its own laws by fitting out expeditions to levy war against a nation with which it is at peace, they have an unimpeachable right to sell to whom they please goods which, when the state of war exists, are contraband, and to clear such. goods at any an of entry. This }mmlry rightis not abridged even by the ex- stence of the state of war itself. No right of interference at the port of shipment accrues to Spain now, 50 long as she is not at war, un- til the goods come within her territorial waters, Then, but not till then, her general lice powers attach; she acquires the same ind of right to deal with arms and munitions afloat that she would if they were loaded on a packtrain ashore, in custody of cwners’ agents and destined to the use of rioters or {nsurgents. But even if at war Spain would have no moral right of protest nor any t of interference ti‘ll the goods were clear of port and on the hi 6!: seas. pon representations made by the Spanish Minister, and acting out of its own redun- dancy of zeel, the Federal Government_has set spies over several lawful shipments, and insti- tuted proceedings to prevent their clearance, which wholly lawless procedure has been queshed by the courts directly they obtained a hearing. In Florida similar measures have been carried out in a wey even more high- handed and without shadow of right. e right to enforce its own laws by arresting e breach of them in the very act is one m:i; the Federal authori may thus it sulig of L ody o1 e Oranized o hosile nsf n. A ves clear] built for warllke ' barsosts 1o entolmnL e ! to confiscation nnfl"er, any rule of law te of war ;dairno& 50 long 25 a & exist. She cannot even lawfully converted to its own use upon payment of her value by the Government in whose. she lies, g0 all:ltz;:te‘f! w-tr lexuu. must not sail wi ntion of levying war on & power with whom theGovernment 1s at Dpeace, 13x that lean offense- against our own. 1ot the law of nations; but so long as neither proof Tior a reasonable presumption of that destina- tion ean be prov inst her, she has a law- ful Tight 1o her cleatance, b S playing detective and policeman at the dieta- tion of the Spanish ter has 5 re Government in a contemptible | i A and itis time the who!e business were stopped. FEBRUARY 5, 1896. Spain Is in fact st war. Let her ssume all of the responsibilities ol“ herposition.—New York Evening Sun. - b - i Y ASLEEP. tired Mother Earth has gone to sleeP: alk tiptoe through her chamber lest she waken! . 4 Her children faithfal waich above her keep, ‘Whiie she with siumber sweet is overtaken. Notlong ago a thousand tendor ferns Spread over her their wealth of dew-spun lac And nestled close to hér warm heart, where bur: The fire that kindles springtime’s sylvan graces. And when the blessed Mother longed for rest, How soothingly the little slender grasses Threw all thelr soft gréen arms across her breast; No wintry Blast touch her as it passes! The maples watched her with a beaming smile ‘When proud October covered them with glory, And gladly dofied thelr golden robes the while w! them they made her bed—the old sweet story. And yesterday all day the longing sky Bent lovingly and wistfully above her, ‘While s0ft white kisges—oh, so Lenderly ! Came down and covered Ler—who could but love er Dear Wi EDWAED A. JENKS In the Boston Transcript. AN EDUCATED CHIMPANZEE. Johanna, the educated chimpanzee, gave an exhibition before a highly interested audience in Central Park one day last week. The follow- ing mérning the newspapers gave full accounts. of the wounderful things she accomplished, particularly in the way of letter-writing and drawing. Johanna is very fond of her keeper, *| Mr. McKay, end obeys him readily. He lets her know what he wants her to do more by the inflection of his voice than by.the words he uses. ' Such words as he does use are in Portu- guese, the language, he explained, of the sailors who captured her siter killing her mother thirteen years agoin Africa. He says Johanna will yet learn to understand him ‘when he talks to her in English. Mr. MoKay began the proceedings, asit were, by handing Johanna a piece of -cardboard, on which he had drawn her picture. Johsnna '| 1847. Bhe is old enough, either way. the neat costume, the skirt of which was ::‘uhle:}z thengnh. stripes formed points at each seam. . ANSWERS TO CORRESPONDENTS. BaTTENBERG—T. T. P, Oity. The relations of 1ate Prince of Battenberg to Victoria, Queen é?exfxilmd!:' were such that he eould d t her table. WarteR DaMRoscH—R. P. J., City. A letter addressed Walter Damrosch, New York City, care of the Dramatie Mirror, with a request to forward, will reach that gentleman. No ApmrssioN Feg—C. D., City. The book- makers at the Bay District track pay so much & day for the privilege of making books on the track, and in consideration of thatpayment they are not required to pay an admission fee at the gate. Two Smips- 7. K., City. The length of the American ship Roanoke is 311.2 feet, beam 49.2 feet and depth 20.2 feet. The length of the American ship May Flint, formerly the steamer Persian Monarch, is 350.5" feet, breadth 42.8 feet and depth 27.9 feet. Divegs.—The bird commonly called “diver,” found on the marshes of California is the American ‘eared grebe (Colymbus nigricollis Californicus). The bird breeds in this State. The eggs are four in number, nearly oval, with smooth surface, bluish, which becomes more or less discolored, turning buff, brown and orange. TAMALE—E. G. §., Livermore, Alameda County, Cal. The word tamale is of Spanish- American origin and is traced to the South American countries, where it was first applied toa dish made of crushed Indian corn and mea¢, seasoned with red pepper. Afterward cornmeal was substituted for the crushed corn, end it was prepared in corn husks, as it is to- day. Then the preparation .found its w-g to Mexico, Texas and neighboring States. No the olive isadded to the composition and the cornmeal is made into s paste that 1s spread on successive corn husks previously dipped in oil; the whole being tied and bofled. Some authorities'declare that the word should be spelled tamal, not tamale. THE CITY oF NEW Yorx—O. 8, City. The steamer City of New York, belonging to the people are rather—rather decent, are they not? Now, I am & Daughter of the Revolution. R . Miss Nobody of Nowhere—Mercy! How well you carry your years.—Woonsocket Reporter, PARAGRAPHS ABOUT PEOPLE. Bernhardt's age'is under new discussion. Bome sey she was born in 1854, and otbers in George Frederick Watts, the celebrated Eng- lish artist, whose eighty-second year will be ¢ompleted in February next, is still in excel- lent health and works with characteristic assi- duity, Mr. Charles Fraser, the Scotland Yard official who is in constant attendance- on Queen Vie- toria, is a delightful gentleman, as well asa skillful detective, and has grown to be a great personal favorite with her Majesty. 5 Dr. Milburn, the blind chaplaiu of the Sen- ate, was first elected a Congressional chapiain in December, 1845, just half & century ago. He was then 22 years of age, and the youngest man whose voice has ever been heard in Con- gress before or since that date. Gomez, the wonderful Cuban insurgent gen- eral, is & man of 60, aboutb feet 7 inches in height, and weighing not over 140 pounds. He is deseribed by an English officer serving with the rebels as alert, eool, calculating and intrepid. There are four Chinese students at the Uni- versity of Michigan, Ann Arbor, &nd two are women. They call themselves Mary Stone and Ids Kahn, and the latter is suppesed tobea lineal descendant of Confucius. They are nat- urally somewhat shy, but are quite popular with their fellow-students. George L, Wellington, who has been elected to succeed Semator Gibson of Maryland, is ‘what is commonly termed a selt-made man. He attenaed rchool only a year and & halfin his'boyhood, but afterward, while at work, spent his evenings in securing an education, JOHANNA MAKING PICTURES. sat on her haunches, held the cardboard in her left paw and with her right started.in dil- igently to copy the portrait. Ina few minutes sge walked to the bars of her cage and handed the cardboard and the pencil to Mr. McKay, when, to the astonishment of wll, it was seén she had not only made & pretty faithiul copy of ;he picture, but had added” the arms and body to it. The audience applauded and Mr. McKay was delighted. : - « ’ée can do more tlian that,” he said, -witha smile “She will now write a letter.” He then handed Johanna & piece of paper and the pencil, and Johanna, using the floor Sketch of Johanna, Made by Herself. of her cage for & writing-desk, made several curved lines on the paper and handea it to Mr. McKay. : “Ican’t make out,” he seid, “what she means to say. but I suppose her chimpanzee relatives in Africa can.” Mr. McKay sgoke in a commendatory tone to Johanna and she hopped around the cage, at every hop emitting a guttural sound that her keeper said was & laugh of satisfaction. Of course, the audience had to take his word for Johanna’s Letter. it that it was a laugh, but it was the queerest laugh any of them had ever heard. And every time she laughed Johanha opened her moutl to its fullest width and tossed her head back- ward and forward. CURRENT HUMOR. “Do you let your wife have her own way?” “Oh, yes; it's only when she wants to have mine that I obj_ect." hington Times. ' She—Yes, they are engaged. Iknow she re. fused him twice, but the third time he pro- posed she accepted him. Her Husband—serves Life. “Ig the wah talk all ovah?" asked Fweddy. *Oh, yes,” answered Cholly. “There’s not going to be any wah.” ‘Whereupou Fweddy resolutely rolled up his trousers again. Uncle Josh—I see where some of them fellers that makes wheels say they have a bicycle plant that— Aunt Fanny—Land sakes! You don’t mean to say they’ve got to growin’ 'em.—Puck. Patient—Doctor, do you think I will recover? Dr. Sooher—Yes, I am sure of it. You are the fortieth, One in forty recovers from your dis- edse, and the thirty-nine that I have treated are all dead.—Texas Sifter. “Wait one moment,” said the eminent states- man to_the reporter, who had come for the manuseript of his speech. “Iwant to make a little correction.” And he made a hasty erasure where he had written the bracketed word ‘applause” and the applause had failed to come in.—Chicsgo Tri- bune. . Triyvet—There is one queer thing about the gold reserve. Diter—What is that ? “Trivvet—The smaller it is the more attention itattracts.~New York World. S Mother—I hear that the lieutenant had the impudénce to kiss you at the station. What dm,m“mr—l)h,r I kissed him, 100, 50 as to Daughte: , make people think we were relatives.—Flie- gende Blaetter. ' Miss Winthrop Bludblue (baughitily)—Your him right.—Brooklyn Pacific Mail Steamskip Company and fiying the American flag, ran ashore on the rocks near Point Bonita during a fog on the 26th of Octo- ber, 1892. She was bound for China and Japan and loaded to her full capacity—3020 tons—with flour and g cargo-of general mer- chandise. She had 133 passengers oun board. All were taken off,as was also $290,000 in specie. She was in command of Captain F. H. Johnston and in charge of Pilot George Jobn- son. A great portion of the cargo was saved, but the vessel, after & number of efforts to Rulf her off, becarie a total wreck. A wrecking firin that purchased her saved part of the movable objecis. After an official inquiry Captain Johnston, the master, was exonerated, but the blame was laid on Pilot Johnson and his license was revoked. TowNsSEND's California glace fruits, 50¢, 1b. * ————— There was & good deal of sound human na- ture in the unexpected reply of the dying old woman to her minister’s leading question: “Here, at the end of a long life, which of the Lord’s mercies sre you most thankful for?” Her eyes brightened as she answered, “My victuals.”—London Household News, ————— EPECIAL information daily to manufacturers, business houses and public men by the Prass Clipping Bureau (Allen’s), 510 Montgomery. * ————————— Aunt Dorothy—How many commandments are there, Johnnie? Johnnie (glibly)—Ten. Aunt Dorothy—And now suppose you were to break one of them? Johnnie (tentatively) — Then there’d be nine.~Truth. PURE, ich, red blood naturally follows taking Hood's Sarsaparilla. It dnivesout germs of dis case and builds up the whole system. It gives new life, as it were. Try it and be convinced. which included a thorough grounding in his- tory and literature. The board of visitors of the University of Wisconsin has just investigated a charge that President Charles K. Adams is “a born and bred aristocrat,” and has decided that the charge is unfounded, on the ground that the president was born on a farm and worked his wey through school and college. —— “Mrs. Winslow’s Soothing Syrap” Has been used over fitty years by millions of mothe ers for thelr children whils Teething with perfaas success. 1t soothes the chlld, softens the gums, al- lays Pain, cures Wind Colic, regulates the Bowals and is the best remedy for Diorrbeas, whethee arising froi teething o other causes. For sals 0y Druggists in every partof the world. He sureaad ask or Mrs. -Winslow's Sooihiig Syrip. 48e + bortle. 3 M. Avez, a well-knoivn politician of Parls, died recently, and his funeral was attended by & curious incident. The representatives of the Chamber of Deputies found that thé coffin was draped in rted, the emblem of revolution. Under these clrcumstances they found itim- possible to hold the eords, and contented themselves by simply walking with the mourn. ers. —— : CORONADO.—Atmosphere I8 perfectly dry, soft and mild, and is entirely fres from the mists com~ mon farther north. Round-trip tickets, by steam- ship, including fifteen days' board ac the Hotel del Corouado, $60; longer stay $2 50 per day. Apply 4 New Moutgomery st.. San Francisco. ———————— Wx do not like baldness, gray halr, dandruft, nor thin locks. Avoid these erratic features of the hair by using PARKER'S HATE BALSAM. The dowager Empress Frederick of Germany takes great interest in all the occupations of country life, and has lately turped her atten- tion to bee-keeping, which she considers a most useful industry for the peasant popula- tion. In order to encourage bee-keepingshe has become the honerary president of tne ‘Weisbaden District Bee Society. i hafurs ksl cibintas Smith—Blumer is one of the most thoughtful men I ever saw. Jones—What has he been doing now? Smith—The other day he sent foran umbrells 1 had borrowed from him and bad my name An interesting memento of Izaak Walton has | engraved on the handle.—Pearson’s Weekly. turned up in the library of a Surrey vicar, now being prepared for salein London. It is a copy of Dr. Brown’s sermons, date 1640. On the fly-leaf is written in Izaak Walton’s holograph: “For my deserving and most deare Ante, Mrs. Susanna Cranmer, from her dutiful and most affectionate nephew, Izaak Walton.” Strange Things Going On! All the Folks Surprised ! Mem.—A man pofinded his finger; lost fifteen minutes’ time, curing it. Few of therulersof Europe play cardsexcept as & pastime. The King of Italy detests cards and will not take them in his hand, it is said, owing to the fact that his father wasted hours over them. The Emperar of Austria plays a few innocent games. Since the death of Al- phonso XII card playing hasbeen forbidden at the court of Spain. Emperor William also frowns upon cards and never plays excepting when on a yachting trip, Another got a whack square in the eye.” He was docked one hour's pay—could then see out of it and % went to work again. This label, says the - Paris correspondent of thé London News, bas been stuck on the glass which holds Gambetta’s brain in the anthro- pological museum in the old convent of the Cordeliers: “Léon Gambetta, died on Decem- ber 31, 1882, of perityphlitis, at the age of 43. Gambetta, was, above everything else, an orator. This can be seen from the great devel- opment of the third frontal and left convolu- tion—a development greater than any other so far noticed.” A PRETTY WAIST. The demand for extra waists is steadily growing, and one of the latest fancies is for shirring. Bright plaids are very effective when made in this way, and are very stylish. A mixture of green, grayand red, in & medium- sized plaid was made after this pattern, and had a collar of green chiffon to match. Another of brown, violet and greens had a Still another bad sat up nights with Felons, tried cocaine and opium, but the agony had got there first and would not yield. Finally his wife, who had cured her tender feet, gave him a pointerand Hubby's Agony Found a Master, For he says he “Was Asleep in Ten Minutes.” Yo “Royal Purple” After either accident. MrromsLL’s Magic Loriox did the business for them all. Money in Your Pocket To have it around, for nobody knows when or where the Lightning Is Going to Strike. Any Druggist can get it for you— 25¢, 50c and $1. Be sure and read the directions. Wednesday, Feb. 5th. To-day only. Came—brick — Embroi- dery,fine quality,1# inch, Flouncing. 1 in. edge, 3¢ yard.” Regular 10c grade. “Drop in*’ and see our Weekly Specials. SMITHS' CASH STORE, 414,416, 418 FRONT ST, S. F, violet velvet collar with a bunch of violets on either side, and a tiny roll of violet velvet finished the bottom of the waist. - Washable silks made up very Pn\ttfly after this model, and_all the light-weight evening goods dre used tocarry out this design. A pink and white stripea silk had & trimming of white lace-over the sleeve puffs, the front ends helngocnt away to form points that meet at the bottom of the waist. Pink satin ribbon finished the edge of the lace ruffie and formed ‘bows on the shoulders. A roll of the same at the bottom, and a.collar of wider ribbon fin- - If you want & sure relief for mains in the back, side, chest, or limbs, use an Allcock’s s Plaster BEAR IN MIND—Not oné of the host of counterfeits i tions is as good as the genuine. G 0 it