Omaha Daily Bee Newspaper, November 13, 1916, Page 4

/ A Short Ballot Recruit, Friends of the short ballot movement will welcome the active assistance of a powerful re- cruit in the Chicago Tribune. The Tribune may perhaps have favored the short ballot heretofore, but it is now spurred on by the lesson of the re- cent election, to take up the demand and put punch into it. Nowhere has the case been hetter stated than in these words of the Tribune: “ If the people are to control, their political machinery must not be so complicated that the average man cannot follow its workings. When the voter is given a ballot such as the one he struggled with last Tuesday he can- not vote on his own knowledge on most of the offices, He must vote on faith or not at all, except in the most conspicuous cases. e result is not the expression of the pop- ular will. Candidates are nonnnallfy chosen by the people, when in fact the people have been compelled to thoose blindly, The, political machines have chosen these men and the people have accepted them passively. v The multiplicity of elective officers is not democratic but anti-democratic. It weakens both the responsibility of officials and the re- sponsibility of citizens. We must make gov- ernment as simple and responsible as possible. If we do not we shall never have popular self- government, e These arguments, with variations, have been urged by The Bee time.and again, but will bear constant repetition, until the needed reform is accomplished, whether it comes all at once or is attained only by degrees. ‘THE OMAHA DAILY BEE FOUNDED BY EDWARD ROSEWATE VICTOR ROSEWATER, EDITOR. | THE BEE PUBLISHING COMPANY, PROPRIETOR. Entered at Omaba postoffice as second-elass mn‘lf; % and Sunday witheut Sunda eni ly. . .20¢ nd Sunday ‘Bes, ‘hree years I advince. § notice of change of address or irregularity in jvary to Omaha Bee, Circulation Department. e e kb S, . REMITTANCE. & | Rem draft, express or postal order. Only 2-cent stamps uh:‘ bh, -l':;-l u::nu. Personal cheeks, | except om By Mail per 6. de. and eastern exchange, not OFFICES. T, PSS 1e N piveet L A K Chi 18 People’s Gas Building. New York—Room 863, 286 Fifth avenue. S, Cireulation Manager. and sworn to before me Car Shortage and Freight Rates. One of the most recent arguments advanced in support of an increase in freight rates is the present car shortage. It is now contended that the revenues of the roads are so low in time of business depression that it is ympossible to ac- quire sufficient equipment to meet the demands when business is expanding. This point is very plausibly set forth, but holds about as much of real merit as most of the propositions presented to bolster up the higher rate campaign. While superficially attractive and apparently sound, ex- amination generally discloses a fundamental weakness. The car shortage argument raises a question in economy. Is it desirable that the public shall pay for extra box cars that must be idle and un- productive during a good part of the time in order that shipments may be expeditiously made at certain rush ? Are we to add the transportation industry to the list of “seasonal occupations”? The producers naturally want to get their wares to the market at times when the prices are in their favor. Under existing condi- tions the rush to market crops, live stock and other farm produce necessitates storage at cer- | tain points, which favors price manipulation and control, a practice much complained of. If it were possible to meet the demands for shipment of goods, the plethora at the storage centers would be still greater, and the consequent effect on the price to the producer would very probably | be the opposite of what is sought, He would find _himeelf on the market at a time when the excess of demand would have its natural result, and purchaser with facilities for stor- age would reap any advantage that might grow out of early marketing. No good would come to $:c :anmnm. who must finally pay the price. istinct ntage may be noted in the situation M’:I'\I. provide the railroads with steady employment for the equipment they have, even if it does extend the period of handling the farm produce through a greater portion of the year. The public must always stand the expgnse W Picking presidential candidates now for 1920 at any rate a harmless pastime. ; Sepeme— 1o ome envy Mr. Wilson his job of steer- ship of state through the troubled waters next four years. returns from Minnesota justified the the noiseless trail of John Lind be readily mapped out. em— % fate of hero aviators of war differs little that of the common ,run of high Afiers. r or later both m‘uk to earth with & A e SR e Wb shovid compl: for, m all others, is the suc- ? vhlc‘h he per- of idle ¢ , no matter in what industry, a8 the alternative is bankruptcy for the enter- prise. A better adjustment of the transportation over a greater period, thus insuring more de- pendable employment for the railroads and greater stability in price Is Tammany Really Dead? | “Tammany is dead!” proclaims the New York World. “That is the true significance of the election’ returns from New York City.” Which information is, indeed, interesting if true, But it will take more than this assurance to con-/ vince the people of its truth. The fact is that Tammany has more feline qualities than the proverbial ‘cat with nine lives, for it has been hilled over and over again and pronounced po- litically dead more often even than has William Jennings-Bryan, himself, yet has none the less ‘bobbed up as big as ever to do business again at the old stand. The World seems to have per- suaded itself that in the next municipal election “the stampede to avoid the Tammany nomination for mayor will tax the resources of the police reserves.”” Here we have a prediction and a test. We shalt'see how dead Tammany really is by the time New York City gets ready to choose an- other set of municipal officials next year. ——— Nepotism Again. | . One of the indictments brought by the repub- licans of Missouri, in their platform, against the democratic administration in that staté charges nepotism and promises legislation to put a stop to it, The nepotism business, which is nothing but a graft, as everybody knaqws, is not confined to Missouri, but is likewise an affliction frequently suffered in Nebraska. There is no good reason, however, why this abuse need be tolerated if only public opinion is aroused to its viciousness. An antisnepotism bill, drafted by the editor of The Bee, introduced into our legislature two sessions ago, came very near passing the house even over the active opposition of the office-holding horde who had loaded the public pay roll, with “their sisters, their cousins and their aunts.” Some ‘fearless and aggressive member of our next leg- islature can make a record for himself by pushing through a law scoring for Nebraska ahead of Missouri in putting a quietus on the noxious nepotism nuisance. — The entrance of Hon. Jeannette Rankin, con- gresswoman-elect of Montana, into the highest level of legislative life, question in politico-social etiquette. Having won, the title “Honorable” by right of victory, by the same action the distinctive prefix “Miss” is overshadowed if not wholly discarded. Many dis- cerning women rightly contend, as a measure of safety, that men should bear a tag or title in- dicating their status as married or single, Should Congresswoman Rankin prefer the new to the old and more interesting title, the example may be followed down the line and produce in masculine circles some of the confusion besetting eligible maids. Until this question is settled right the safely of the country is not wholly assured. ——— * California reveals in its political gyrations the main characteristics of its climate. Los An- d geles revels in sunshine and republicanism, * | while San Francisco sprouts ! unted to $691,000,000. Nebraska's soil prod- this year aggregate in vilue $341,000,000. ‘Of almost greater interest than that mani- ‘in the deportment of a winner is that be- owed upon the general bearing of the loser. latter certainly comes under close and criti- crutiny, and the way in which he carries him- has no little to do with the determination of ‘niche which he gains permanently in the of the people. this respect the distinguished citizen who second as a result of yesterday's poll will “well if he even succeeds in becoming an ac- understudy to former President Taft, ‘man has carried gracefully and big-heart- burden of defeat it has been Mr. Taft. umdenql& he must have felt his defeat, how: . and with what even and admirable amia- he has “toted” the memory long after other the honorable scars might have been thought are both brought out in some remarks made by him on the subject of world- ace. During their delivery Mr. Taft un- erred to the “planks” in the league’s In response to the laughter that fol- excused himself in these as one will.to escape from the A5 ation, :‘hen_ still rem;ir;: some h find expression in a word here or 0w and tbhen." il 4 _words, these, in condonation of words ther 5 constitute no offense, but were calculated to endear the utterer to ho heard them. m tlemeanor has not the 8 among our t. in error, John O\flncg“A s, : out the back door * triumph- In the light of that for- big of body and of 4 THE BEE: OMAHA, MONDAY, NOVEM Chinese Proveros Think twice and do not speak at all. Only those become priests who cannot earn a living. At seventy a man is a candle in the wind. A thousand soldiers are easily obtained; one general is hard to find. Do not lace your shoes in a melon patch. Easy to open a shop; hard to keep it open. Of all important things the first is not to cheat conscience. -problem would be the extension-of marketing | esents a perplexing ' nd democracy. | All pursuits are mean in comparison with learning. " In a united family happiness springs up of itself, . He bought a dried fish to spare its life. Win your law suit, lose your money. Better do kindness near home than go far to burn incense. If you suspect a man don’t employ him; if you employ him don't suspect him. | Eugenics gfi Efittk-Cmtrd l Birth-control is sometimes regarded as a meas- ure of eugenics. A writer in the Journal of Heredit; (‘Nuhington, October) asserts that it has nothing to do with eugenics; some eugenists approve it, while others violently oppose it. Only two organized bodies appear to have taken a definite attitude on the subject, both of them on religious grounds. One is the Catholic chyrch, the other the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter- Day Saints, popularly known as the Mormon church. Eugenics, the writer reminds us, is a movement to better the quality of human mate- rial; its quantity, whether more or less, is a matter of secondary interest! Of course if it can succeed in lessening births among the unfit and increasing them among the fit, it will be ac- complishing its object. We read: “Antagonism of the Roman Catholic church toward the ‘birth-control’ movement is well known. This antagonism is based on theological grounds, but it has frequently been pointed out that the result, whether the church has the fact in mind or not, wil] be to give the church a slowly increasing preponderance in numbers, in any community where the population is made up in part of Catholics and in part of Protestants. “The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, popularly known as the Mormon church, has taken a similarly antagonistic stand on birth- control. Theological objections are raised against it; but in this case what may be called the eugenic aspect, the problem of altering the relative rtions of different classes in a pop- ulation, 18 c! eul{umn and acknowledged. “In the July issue of the Relief Society Maga- zine an official publication issued at Salt Lake City, five of the twelve elders who make up the supreme council of the orgamization, state their views on birth-control, “The eugenic_ view.of the subject is most clearly seen by Elder Joseph F. Smith, jr., who points out: I feel only the atest contempt for those who, because of a little worldly learning or a feeling of their own superiority over others, ad- vocate and endeavor to control the so-called “lower classes” from what they are pleased to call “indiscriminate breeding.” ““The old colonial stock that one or two cen- turies ago laid the foundation of our great na- tion is rapidly being replaced by another people, due to the practice of this erroneous doctrine ‘of “small families.” According to statistics gathered by a leading magazine published in New: York, a year or two ago, the average number of chil- dren to a ily among the descendants of the old American stock in the New England states was only two and a ion, while among the immigrants from European shores who are now coming into our land the average family was wm“poled of more than six. “Thus the old stock is surely being replaced by the “lower classes,” of a sturdier and more worthy race. Worthier because they have not learned, in these modern times, to disregard the great commandment given to man by our Heav- “li Father. It is, indeed, a case of the survival of the fittest, and it is only a matter of time before those who so strongly advocate and practice this !nrnkloun doctrine of “birth-control” and the lim- ting of the number of children in the family will d themselves and weir kind out of “i'm:;i, 4 : : r to point out thar birth-control is not, as t:o public seems to suppose, an integral part of the eugenics propaganda. Many eugeni- cists advocate it; many. others oppose it. In cither case, it must be regarded as a fact with which eugenics must deal. If one section of 2 community limits the number of births, and an- other does it is easy to calculate how soon the latter section will supplant the former, and there are plenty of ob; ect-lessons such as Mr. Smith cites in the old colonial stock of New England. have “The eugenicist, of course, is more interested in the quality than in the quantity of the popula- tion, The quantity is im&onant only in a relative way. In opposition to Mr. Smith and other peo- ple without adequate knowledge of biology, the cugenicist holds that there is a difference in the inherent quality of various sections of the popu-, Iation, and that if an inferior section multiplies much more rapidly than a superior section, the result will be very serious from the standpoint of national efficiency and racial progress. “Precisely such a result has taken place in the United States during the last half-century. “It is unquestionable that the number of births has been much limited in the economically most efficient sections of the population of the United States, and very little limited in the least efficient sections. “It is\also unquestionable that the spread of the birth-control propaganda in the ’lower classes' is at the present time very rapid. Whether BER 13, 1916. TODAY | Thought Nugget for the Day. One inch of joy surmounts of grief a span, Because to laugh is proper to the man. —Francis Rabelais. One Year Ago Tocay in the War. German mission arrived at Athens. | Russian offensive on Riga-Dvinsk front gained momentum. Germans and Bulgarians drove Ser- bians out of Morava valley. Shah of Persia received allied min- isters and declared himself friendly to allles. n Omaha Thirty Years Ago. ‘The members of the German School association have styled themselves “The German Ladies’ School Society” and have placed it under the manlfi ment of the following officers: M Lucke, president; Miss Augusta Perry, secretary; Miss Stella Rosewater, treasurer executive committee, Mrs. Louis Heimrod, Mrs. W. Segelke and Miss Nettie Richards. The last of the dangerous walls of the burned Barker block were torn down, leaving standing but the first floor, Workmen are busily engaged in rebuilding the Davis building adjoining the Barker, while the Ames office will soon be in first class condition. The Arst sleighbells of the season are jingling, but the constantly falling snow prevents any great demand for sleighs from the local livery stables. There was an oppressive air of quiet around the court house, occasioned by the absence of Deputy Sheriff Phillips, who was snowed in at the Millard, and his side partner, Mike Leahy, who had not succeeded in get- ting through drifts of snow that made him a prisoner in the boller room under the temple of justice. Superintendent Whitlock issued a bullding permit to Nathan E. Adams for the construction of a residence to cost $2,000, at the corner of Twenty- second and Miami. This Day in History. 1761—8ir John Moore, who conduct- ed the memorable British retreat to Corunna, born in Glasgow. Died at Corunna, January 186, 1809. 1776—Montreal was captured by General Richard Montgomery. 1809—Admiral John A. Dahigren, who invented the system of ordnance that bears his name, was born in Philadelphia. Died in Washington, D. C. July 12, 1870, 1814—General Joseph Hooker, cel- ebrated union commander, was born at Hadley, Mass. Died at Garden City, L.-1., November 2, 1879, 1851—8ubmarine telegraph between England and France opened. - 1866—Right Rev. Anthony O'Regan, third Catholic bishop of Chicago, died in London. Born in Ireland in 1809. 1886—Serbia declared war against Bulgaria. 1890—The fln;é-n(e legislature of ‘Wyoming convel at Cheyenne. 1900—United States cruiser Yosem- ite was wrecked at Guam by a ty- phoon. I 1907—The German emperor Wwas welcomed in London. 1909—More than 300 lives were lost in an explosion in the St. Paul mine at Cherry, IIL 1914—Brigadier General Hugh L. Scott was appointed chief of staff of the United States army. The Day We Celebrate. ' B. P. Roggen is celebrating his six- ty-ninth birthday. He is an old-timer in politics, having been secretary of state for two terms some thirty years 1 ago. H. N, Jewett, wholesale lumber mer- chant, was born November 13, 1849, at Fort Madison, Ia. He has been forty years in the business and before com- ing to Omaha he lived in Broken Bow. W. H. Rowland, traveling passenger agent for the Pennsylvania lines, with headquarters in Omaha, is 47. He was born at Stubenville, O., and first en- tered the railroad service as clerk in the freight house at Denison, Ia. Dr. Frank 8. Owen, oculist and aur- ist, i8 celebrating his sixtieth birth- day today. He was born in Seville, O. Thomas F. Sturgess, editor of the Twentleth Century Farmer, is just 63 years old. He was born on a farm near Niobrara, Neb., became a printer and thence into farm journalism. Louis Brandeis, associate justice of the supreme court of the United States, was born at Loulsville sixty years ago today. 3 Joseph F. Smith, president of the Mormon church, was born at Far West, Mo., seventy-eight years ago to- day. Prince Albert, ruler of the little pringipality of Monaco, was born six- ty-elght years ago today. The duke of Marlborough, who mar- ried Miss Consuelo Vanderbilt of New York, was born at Simla, India, forty- five years ago today. John Drew, one of the foremost actors 'of the American stage, was born in Philadelphia sixty-three years ago tpday. J. Sloat ' Fassett, former congress- man and long & republican leader in or not one agprovel of that spread, it is certain that the birth-rate in those classes is likely to fall, thus checking the very serious differential nature of the present birth-rate. “If, at the same time, eugenics can succeed to some extent in increasing the birth-rate among the socially most valuable sections of the com- munity, then the present demonstrable deteriora- tion of the American stock, as a whole, will grad- ually become less menacing.” | Elections Cost Too Much I New York World: Once more at the conclusion of a long-drawn- out presidential camgaixn the thought will occur to most people that these contests begin too early, demand too much time and cost too much energy and money. S June conventions are a survival of stage- coach days when communication was slow and difficult. Under existing conditions there is no nmuits for making nominations before Septem- ber, and a month devoted to the consideration ot the claims of candidates and parties should be ample. Formerly vast sections of the country were difficult of access. Today there is hardl a hamlet from coast to coast that is not in mncK with or within easy reach of the telegraph, the railroad and the Tmfln( press, Campaigns of unnecessa more than useless expense and labor. They are distracting to all the usual activities of life; they lead to repetition; and to escape the tiresome- ness of repetition, they encourage the unscrupu- lous to promote archaic electioneering devices that do no credit to anybody. The American pec;gle are at all times well informed politically. Having had an opportunity to examine any candidate’s record for four or five weeks, their knowledge of the general situation should fit them for an intelligent expression of four or five mont length involve New York, was born at Elmira, N. Y., sixty-three years ago today. Charles E. Courtney, the celebrated coach of the Cornell university crews, was born at Union Springs, N. ixty-seven years ago today. ud” Goodwin, the world's great- est all-around swimmer, was born in New York City thirty-four years ago today. Timely Jottings and Reminders. The third season of grand opera in Chicegs, unde~ the direction of Cleo- fonte Campanini, will be opened to- night with a performance of “Alda.” Nearly 500 delegates, representing 3,000,000 organized workers, will gather in Bhitimore today for the thir- ty-sixth annual convention of the American Federation of Labor. The Interstate Commerce commis- sion is to hold a hearing at Pitts- burgh today in the case of the Amer- ican ‘Bridge company against the Union Pacific railroad. The claims of St. Louis as a location for one of the proposed farm loan banks will be presented to the Farm Loan board at a hearing to be held at St. Louls today. Storyette of the Day. A new arrival at a certain boarding house was a man who had taken part in a famous arctic exploration, and at dinner time he often regaled the other boarders with stories of his ad- ventures. ‘'Yes,” he said, after one particu- larly thrilling description, “we were slowly starving to death. Just when things were at the last gasp one fel- low had an idea; he cut up our boots and made soup of them, and— “Hush, hush!" hissed all the other boarders, anxiously. “Don’t,let the landlady hear you!"—Philadelphia Ledger. 1 - Discord on That Diet. Omaha, November 12.—To the Edi- tor of The Bee: I have read the menu compiled by the head of the home economic department of Bellevue col- lege. I can only say that she should blush for shame. Her diet, recommended to us as a triumph’ of economy, is one to make any true American sit up and take notice. It's worse than that of any penitentiary; worse than that of slaves in ante-bellum days, Man is entitled to all the fruits of the earth, not just enmough to keep body and soul together, No, my dear lady; you had better employ your time in evolving some scheme whereby all laborers of Ell classes can have a full, bountiful share of all that is good and nourish- ing and pleasant to eat. MRS. ELLEN BALIS EGAN, 1629 Grant Street. Yes, But It Has Withstood That Test. Benson, Neb., Nov. 12.—To the Edi- tor of The Bee: The most remarkable thing about this movement for state prohibition is, that at least 75 per cent of the agitators for it are people who lack self-control, reformed drunkards who cannot take a drink without crav- ing for a barrel. Thus we have the unique spectacle of people who lack self-control making an organized at- tempt to get legisiation enacted to| control people who are capable of controlling themselves. State prohi- bition is a blow at the Statue of T.iberty and a contrayention of the constitution of the United States, which forbids the | enacting of laws by any state, that con- flicts ' with the constitution of the United States, or has a tendency to abridge the personal rights and liber- ties of the people residing within its Jjurisdiction. Therefore, the supreme court of the United States would be Jjustified in declaring the measure un- constitutional. z THOMAS HENRY WATKINS, No Jeremiad This Time. Omaha, Nov, 10.—To the Editor of The Bee: To meet. individually all my true and tried friends who voted for me Tuesday would be a physical impossibility. i Therefore, 1 desire to extend my most sincere and heartfelt thanks/ through your great paper to those patriotic citizens regardless of their political affiliation, particularly the working class—who have elected me for the third time to represent them. I wish to assure them that they will never regret voting for my election. My record at the 1909 and 1915 sessions of the legislature is an open book and speaks for itself. I might further add that I am extremely grateful to the women for champion- ing the cause of my election. Likewise I will say that it is through no_ fault of mine that these noble women are disfranchised. : JERRY HOWARD. Post-Election Reflections. Omaha, Nov. 12.—To the itor of The Bee: This has been an election of surprises and has nullified the prophe- cies of the most skilful campaigners. Lagically and historicelly, Hughes should have been elected; not that Mr. Wilson made a conspicuous failure, but because of the distress caused by high prices, for which he and his party, however, are in no way responsible. They lowered the tariff to lower prices, but the mopopoly maintained by the ‘““gentlemen’s - agreement’” completely nullifies that action. It would be the same if every article of commerce were put on the free list. Tariff under monopoly no longer has anything to do with retail prices, Mr. Wilson has no more responsibility for high prices than with the weather; but the party in power must always bear the blame of hard times, whether responsible or not. According to, past history, this administration ought to have gone down under the present pressure of high prices. The Adamson law was a serious mistake and greatly weak- ened Mr. Wilson's grip on the people. His weak policy toward FEuropean belligerents, and especially Mexico, in spite of the laws he steam-rolled through congress. greatly weakened him in the estimation of patriotic men. ‘With all these things against him, why was he not defeated? Because the republicans did not or- ganize a good campaign against him. In the first place, they did not make concessions enough to the progres- sives. If Hiram Johnson had been nominated with Hughes, he would have carried California and pulled the ticket through. The cool treatment given that great reformer alienated that state and gave it to Wilson. The republican party was defeated, not by Wilson's popularity, but by standpat conservatism. If the breach of 1912 had been healed, as it might have been, the G. O. P. would certainly have been restored to power. This is not the only surprise. Towa, a thoroughly dry state, elected Mr. | Harding, a thoroughly wet candidate, | for governor. Nebraska went decis- ively dry and yet elected a man gov- ernor who has the reputation of be- ing wet. The fact that the state gave| prohibition 25,000 majority and Hitch- cock 13,000 shows that many men can still plow with a horse and an ox hitched together. The democratic party owes its suc- cess to its adoption of reform meas- ures advocated years ago by the pro- hibition, the, socialistic and labor parties, The republican party will have to do the same or go to the po- litical scrap heap. Before the next presidential elec- tion there will be an industrial, eco- nomic and political revolution that will require a new political alignment. Now that tariff, supply and demand no longer control prices—that combines and monopolies are making it almost impossible for the common people to live—we must have a commission to control prices of food, raiment and fuel, just as we have for transporta- tion, pure food and drugs, weights and measures, etc. All Europe has been driven into this drastic and paternal supervitions to keep its poor from starving. n four years from this time all parties will have to adopt prohibition in their platforms, as they now do in most prohibition states. It will be not only the paramount but the domjnant issue by that time. Woman suffrage will stand next in importance, ‘Both parties kow-towed to it in 1916; both will have to adopt it in 1920. The next administraticn will have no easy job. The European war will close and England will establish a government in' Mexico, if we do mot. Mr. Wilson has not prevented war, only postponed it. We must protect life and property in Mexico or give up the Monroe doctrine and cease to be a world power. When Europe gets through with its war it will no longer suffer its subjects to be killed and its property destroyed as the United States has pusilanimously done for the last four years. There is little to hope from Mr. Wilson on this line. He sacrifices all for peace, justice, honor and national dignity. This country needed a change of administration to meet the momentous issues that must soon arise, but it has lost its oppor- tunity by standpat conservatism. The Uniteg States was never so prosperous as it is today. There is no real scarcity in products; there is money to burn, and yet the common people are having a hard struggle to live. Something is wrong; there is a screw loose somewhere and the ma- chinery will be wrecked if it is not tightened, Let us not be deceived by our apparent prosperity. There is a silent but tremendous discontent in little, unincorporated business. A cataclysm is not far off. “When Rome was at the zenith of her glory, a mor- tal disease was upon her vitals.” D. C. JOHN. LAUGHING GAS. Mother—Children, I'm shocked! You each promised me you wouldn't eat your oranges tiil after dinner. You have decelved me. Willie—No, mamma; we didn't eat our own oranges. Tommy ate mine and T ate his.—Boston Transeript. “Did yeu cure that patient you had with the falllng memory?" *“1 thought so at one time, replied the doctor, ‘/but I'm not so sure about it now. He went away and forgot to pay his bill"— Judge. 3 “It I rejected you, would you commit sulcide 7" “I don't know, girlle. Your 16-year-old sister is very attractive. In a few years—" But she accepted him forthwith, and he is working hard nmow to meet the install- ments on an engagement ring.—Loulsville Courfer-Journal. DR MR, KABIDBLE M WIFE oBdsCTS Yo MY* Amateur Poetess—Ten dollars for cor- recting the meter of this little verse! Profeasional Poet—Oh, yes; for this sort of work I charge regular plumbing rates.- Life. ‘Aren’t you the boy who was here a week looking for a position?” — ‘Yes, sir.” “I thought so. And didn’t T tell you then that T wanted an older boy?" “Yes, sir; that's why I'm here now."— Southern Woman's Magazine. “Did Marle get many h.lndlomL ‘wedding presents?” “Yes, Indeed. Her friends were quite extravagant in what they gave her. Why, she got a whole crate of eggs and two bar- rels of flour.”~Baltimore American. “Senator Squareit says he stands for the greatest good to the greéatest number.” “Well, he does. Only he thinks the great- est number is always number one.”—Life. “Does your minister practice what he preaches?” the mewcomer questioned. “He does,” the citizen answered with a sigh, “and T'd be perfectly willing to have him stop. He lives next door to me, and begins at 7 o'clock Sunday morning to prac- tice what he is going to preach.”—New York Times. “The people of your town applauded me with fine enthuslasm.” “That isn't altogether enthusiasm,” sald a member of the reception committee. 'fl'saml of It's hospitality.”—Washington tar. THE ETERNAL PLAY. Richard Le Galllenne, in Harper's Magazine. Third act of the eternal play! Tn poster-like emplazonries, “Autumn once moPe begina today'— "Tis written all across the trees In yellow letters like Chinese. How many hundred centurtes Hath run this play, with ne'er a pause! "That which this llving audience seces Thrilled all the dead to wild applause— And yet the strange old drama draws. Not all allke adjudge the play: Some laugh, some weep, . there be Deem the old classic’s had its day, And some scarce any of its see, Nodding In witless apathy. and some And others more than all the rest One act out of the four prefer— Spring, in her wind-flower draperies drest, Or Summer, with her bosom bare; Winter than these some deem more falr, Sorae, mayhap melancholic deem Autumn the meaning of the play— The smile that says, " “Twas all a dream!” The sigh that says, “ can but stay A little while, and then away;” The rustling robe of joy that ends, k Tho moon-cold kiss upon the brow, The fading sail of sea-sped friends, The love that is another's now, The volce that mourns, “Ah! Where art thou?" For all her purple and her gold, Autumn hath such a tale to tell— { The tale that tells us all is told; ! Tea! but she tells it wondrous well, ‘Weaving strange hope into her spell: The hope that, when we sit no more At this old play, and needs must go ‘Through yonder shrouded exit door, The mystic impresario Hath still for us a stranger show. ing it easy for them holders. We strive to assist worthy employees to lay aside a part of their earnings by mak- to acquire a financial interest in the business. Nearly half of the men employed by this Company are stock- NEBRASKA TELEPHONE (O. ——