Omaha Daily Bee Newspaper, September 7, 1915, Page 9

By JANE M'LEAN. This is my grandmother’s old chest, Where live the things And if I lift the lid I" The world she lived in First comes the scent A dear unspoken brea she loved the best, 11 know long ago. of lavender, th of her, | | | | And then a tiny broken fan, And here the picture of a man. My grandmother, did she coquet While stepping through the minuet” Here s a letter tracin g faint, And slipper buckles carved and quaint, And here the yellow o That one time framed f old lace a girlish face 0, grandmother of long ago, The soul of you must That soul of me supre surely know mely blessed That knows the things you loved the best. By DOROTHY DIX. I have received a letter from a dis- tressed and perplexed husband who asks my advice about how ti cure his wife of her one weakness. is a good woman, really true anc loyal and fond of him. that she's a devoted mother, and a fru- ®al and industrious housekeeper. But' she has one fault that is griev- ous in his eyes. She is fond of admira- tion, She likes to be complimented and have pretty apeecheas made about her, and her hue- band has watcheu with stern disap- probation how her face brightens up when some man be- #ins “Jollying” her. So he wants to know what to do about it. The answer to that question is dead easy, Mr. Husband. Supply the wife with all the admiration she craves, instead of leaving other men to do it. And make the home brand of flattery so strong and full of ginger and snap that any com- pliments she may receive- on the outside will seem as weak and tasteless as del- icatessen dishes do by the side of the goodies that mother cooks. There are men and women with natures so intricate and cranky that their wives and husbands are not to be blamed for never finding the keys to them and be- ing able to manage them. But a man or a woman whose predominant charac- teristic ia the love of admiration is so simple that there is no excuse for thelr “wives and husbands not being able to work them, . The wife who lets some slick-tongued woman take her husband away from her by means of flattery gets exactly what ahe deserves. She had the first inning: She had the ineide track. She knew that her husband simply pyrred under any hand that rubbed the fur the right way with him, and that he beamed and gurgled with delight when anyone told him how big and brave and handsome he was, and yet, knowing this, she felt it her wifely duty to continually remind him of his faults instead of expatiating on his vir- tues, and so left the other woman a chance to get in her deadly work. Equally the man who has a wife who lovea admiration, and who is so dense and stingy and tight-lipped that he re- fuses to even pay her a compliment, is himself to blame if she packs her trunk and hikes off to Reno with some more He says that she appreciative man, or if she becomes ono' of those near-faithful wives who are the ruination of the happiness of any home— women who remain outwardly respect- able, but who indulge in cheap flirtations. Of course, men who crave admiration and appreclation, even if it is only lip service, can always go out into the world and find Jt—or buy it. The average mar- rled woman is not circumstanced so she can do this. She has to depend upon what she can get from her husband, and this is generally nil. 1 know of nothing else in that-is at once so tragic and so pathetic as the gnawing hunger for some word of praise, some token of gratitude, some sign that their husbands even think of them otherwise than as a domestic con- venlence, that most wives suffer, and which their husbands are either too dull 1o percelve or too »efish to make the effort to appease. ¥or'it is literally the truth that after the !oneymoon wanes nine women out of ten never get a com- pliment out of their husbands until it is carved on their tombstone. The lack of adm’ration and apprecia- tion is the main *aing that makes mar- rlage a failure to most women. It fan't poverty. Let a man tell his wife that in his eyes she grows more besutiful every day and she will wear a $10\ suit and feel ke a queen in it. It isn't hard work. Let a man still show an interest in holding his wife's hand and Mee’ll con- wider it a privilege to work it to the bone for him. It isn't the monotony of domes- tic life, Let a man compliment his wife's cooking and she'll think housework the most thrilling occupation on earth. It isn't anything that a man does, or leives undone, except handing out a few com- pliments that makes marriage heaven or the other place to a woman. Nor is this quite as foolish as it sounds. A woman's home 1s her world, Her hus- band is her audience, and it's a dreary thing to g0 on year after year doing your level best, giving yourself body and soul, without ever getting one ripple of applause, or even knowing whether your efforts are even perceived or not, No actor can play his best to a cold house. No clerk gives his best service to an employer who never commends. Even a horse will pull his load better for a word of encouragement or praise. But most married women have to live their married lives without getting o single glad hand from their husbands, and ft's pitiful to hear them beg for a word of praise. I've heard of a woman wy as she tried to corkscrew a compli- went out of her husband, “How do 1 the world!} look?' And without his paper, glancing up from he would reply, “Oh, |enough.” Or she would say, “How do |you like this dress” And’ he would he ever saw, it was the limit. And fail- ing other means, she would ask how he liked a certain dish at dinner, and he would grunt as he gobbled it down, that it had a little too much salt or sugar. Never a word of praise or appreciation. The strange thing about this withhold- THE BKE: OMAHA, TUESDAY, 1915, Learn How to Relax to Be Graceful, Says Ziegfield Girl Miss Sybel Carman illus- trates her accompanying ar ticle by two poses of relaxa tion which she finds beno- ficial in her daily exercise. well | .| answer that of all the darn fool fashions ng of a little flattery from their wives ' is that men, for the most part, do admir their wives. Their own egotism mak: them think that the women they picked out are the headliners of their sex, but they would die rather than tell them so. To know that her husband still thought that she was pretty, to know that he thought her a second edition of Solomon, | to know, that he blessed her in his heart (for all her years of loyalty and devotion, | would make the average woman e premely happy, and pay her for every sacrifice she has ever made, But her husband will never say it to her. ‘The cure for a discontented wife, and for a flirtatious wife, is flattery ad lib applied by the husband. It is a remedy that never falls, How to Keep Your True Love [C— By BEATRICE FAIRFAX, Every day dosens of letters come to by mome uncertain youth or girl may make sure of the love of his or her be- loved. Symptoms and actions are related to me galore and “what she means by this” or “what he intends by that,” are marshalled before my critical judgment. | But so long as human nature is human | nature and change is one of its strongest characteristics, no one cgn sit at an of- fice desk and assue John of Mary's love or guarantee to Mary that John is faith- ful and devoted. | The best way to'be sure of any one's love is to wait until he is so sure of it jthat he tells you perforce. Convention prevents a woman from de- | claring her affection, but her preference must show itself and she sacrifices all) |the joys for the supreme one of being | with her beloved and trying to make him happy. The lllusian of youth often makes us {Muke fancy or infatuation for real {love. The great danger of life les not |in knowing whether or not your beloved {loves you, but in being sure whether or {not you really love your beloved! me asking for same infallible test where- | There is nothing in all the world to! (which “make haste slowly” is so directly | applicable as to love affairs. If only' { youth would stop to weigh and analyse' {the attraction it feels for other youth | instead of yielding to the supreme urge of emotion that has no real basis! But John knows subconsciously that Mary's eyes are blue and tender and Mary's mouth 15 sweet and red. And| s0 John pours out to Mary a,conglomera- | tion of his dreams and aspirations and | desires and ambitions. | And Mary knows that John is tall and | ! strong and handsome, and so she listens { with her heart in her eyes. And, fancy- {ing that they understand one another and are madly in love, they plunge int. an engagement or into matrimony itself. Poor John! Poor Mary! They knew no single true test for true love. The most efficlent test for love that I know is two-fold. Ask yourself not “Can I live with this man or woman,” but {"Can I face life without him?” The in- dividual with whom you want to share your dreams may be very dear to you, but more honmestly dear is the ome into whose dreams you want to-fit yourself. Not in a willingness weakly to sub. | merge yourself, but in a supreme desire for co-operation and understanding les ithe honesty of & big love. The lover | whose life you complete and who com pletes yours—mentally and spiritually as well as emotionally—is your true love. [The one you would detend against the world is your true love. But the final great test of love is this: | | Does your love mean to you life's great | immeortality? Do you want it to bring to you as a result of the perfect partnership of your two lives little children who shall | be like the one for whom you care? Are | you willing to send down to posterity the traits and characteristics of your be- loved? Do they seem to you fine enough and splendid enough to go on down through the generations as a result of your will to immortalise them and your love? Children mean tmmortality great crown of your love. Marriage without them is*seifish. If marriage means to you the shirking of life's great- est responaibility—if it brings to you no longing for little baby faces, you do not know true love, Infatuation may be for the day. Fancy may be for emotional outlet, and even affection may yearn but for the comfort of home and refuge from lomeliness, but love is #0 sure of fteelf and of its per- manent admiration and adoration that it longs for \mmortality and the By ELLA WHEELER WILCOX, (Copyright, 195, Star Company.) There is a certain universal vanity in all human beings—the vanity of sorrow. Ask apy one of your moquaintances if he has had trouble in life, and, almost an. the reply will be to the effect that his sorrows and Lhmie Lave been un- usual; that he has had his sbare which will mean that be 1ceis he has more than his share In country places, in large cities, in villages, it is the eame. scems to be a part of human con- sclousness—this be- llef that each one of us has been Canvenk a spe- - clal dispensation of SOrTOW Only a small percentage of human | beings place the true estimate on the value of trouble, or know that it has its place, machinery, in the epiritual gymnasium, and that by our abllity to use it we may develop character—the purpose, aim and end of existence, Only one individual do I recall hay- ing met In all my experience who made no clalm of sorrow. It was a woman who had counted at least four decades on the dial of life, and she told me she had never known & disappointment or a sorrow; since her birth she had indulged all her wishes; she had never lost a near relative or friend, and had never known a grief worthy of the name. A shallow woman she seemed to me as I studied her—one who enjoyed her | morning coffee and her dinner at night; who was pleased with a new gown and brooch, and who felt no strong affec- tions and was incapable of deep emotiun. Perhaps she had passed throush experi- ences which might have meant sorrow to others without feeling them, and ing missed sorrow, 50, 100, she must have | ¢ l-M-nm great Sorrow One Vanity Common to Humanity Today Miss Sybel Carman, charm- ing member of the Ziegfield Midnight Frolic cast, finishes her article on the way to gain grace through strensth ening the feet. The simple exerclses that Miss Carman has Hlvstrated take only a few minutes each day, and will prove invaluable assets to the woman seriously intent on gain- ing a lithe and graceful figure By SYBEL CARMAN. Yosterday 1 spoke of strengthening the feet. Today's exercises simply oarry on this fdea. 1 truth of the statement that pretty do much toward making pretty women Awkward feet make a woman so clumsy That strong, supple feet and ankles mean more to A& WOmAN'S Erace- fulness than many people suppose. Thick ankles are unnecessary if a woman will bathe and massage her feet frequently foet s why am a firm bellever in the | | Mvidual with a character unlike any one | else | There must be a certain freedom and {lack of stiffness apparent in every move | & woman makes if she would be thought | truly graceful By GARRETT P, SERVISS, Tho legend of an origlnal Paradise on this earth, from which man got himself excluded by his own greediness, turns up in & new and extremely charming form In the stories ocollected by Dr. W. C Farabee, of the University of Pann. | aylvania, among the It well 18 Important, too, to learn to sit This means stralght shoulders and high chest but train | muscles o that they do not sag, Forget yourselt and learn to be natural. No truly Kraceful woman was ever self-consclous 8o many women do not know how to stand when they appear in public. They are donspicuous at a soclal function. | oftentimes, simply because they call at- | tention by consclous awkwardness to thetr ungraceful hands and foet Why not stand as though you took a real pride in yourself?! You are an in in Relax, your In the world 1y s Why not stan' as you amounted to Stand that a line droppod from the center of your head would fall between the arches of your feet. Diatri- bute your welght evenly on both feet And, above all, do not allow yourself to though thing? re some and learn how to wear sensible heels on her shoes. I would add one other caution to the woman secking the beauty of feminine grecefulness. Learn how to relax. Do not be afraid to let yourpelf go. Relaxa- tion will help you to stand and walk well. e Surely swe was no personage to hold as an ideal, and those who belleve they | could have attalned large successes of great helghts, if they had not known sorrow, would have found in her refuta Uon of their theories. The mortal must feel develop. He must know the strong emotions of Iife; he must use his mental qualities in thinking he was out of trouble; he must be anxious at times in order to leam patience; he must pass through the win- ter of sorrow in order to . enjoy the springtime of joy. A In visiting tropical countries it has al- ways seerned that;the natives who dwell there miss a great joy in having eternal summer. in order There are no emotions sweeter than | those which are produced by the sudden dawning of the spring in sky and trees, and in hearing the first sounds of the returned birds, To gaze always upon summer summer foliage and to hear ever the songs of birds can mever repay for the loss of that pecullar happiness which comes in early spring deys. And 80 the heart that has never knows anything but pleasurable sensations must lack the keen joys which come to those who have experienced lack and loss of blessings, and to whom they are re stored—as life always restores measure that which It us, But the real value of sorrow and trial lies In the strengthening of courage, the increase of faith, the growth of character | and the development of the higher at-| tributes of the mind. | Unless we are more sympathetic, more tolerant, more patient and kinder after each trouble, we have missed a great op- portunity which life has offered us, and we must suffer again and again until we recognize the hand of love beneath th #love of patn—untfl we experience the | resurrection. takes from Pausing & moment, ere the day was done, While yet the earth was sclatillant to | an \ skios, | in some | ket lop-sided Was my dead self. some Lent gu dond And yet that grue- it fudden splendor to the falling Showing the conquests that my soul had Up to' the rising stars T looked and oried: few weeks Sanatogen’ On the road to health at last! easy of digestion that the most old—can take it with notbing but “The Practitione: journal, says, tive value of other food material, n upbuil of strength and vilit; that more than 21,000 physicians hav mending it to youis firm and sincere. ‘Won't you give Sanatogen the oppor health and strength ? Sanatogen is sold by good i in sizes from $1.00 up Loadon, 1913, mmn A & with light, 1 od. From valley. | and_height, | path had run. | natlod upo each one 1 for Elbert Hubbard’s new book—"Health in the Makin tal advice on lunm.l. health ER CHEMICAL 'ANY, philosophy, together with caj reminder 10 address THE BA ‘When we tell you that Sanatogen is used by the medical profession all over the world as an aid to convalescence and written letters commending it, you will understand that our confidence in recom- Wal-Wal whom he found dwelling in the TumaocHumac range of moun- taing, on the border between Brasil and the Guianas and #0 remote from cfvillsation that they knew nothing of white men, Dr. Faraboe be- Yeves that these Indians are the descondants of the Cariba and Arowaks whom the Spaniards encountered along the coast 40 years ago. They are ex- oeedingly simple In their ways and tastes, and physically very handsome representa- tives of the human apecies, almost good enough in that reward, according to Dr. Farabes's description, to inhabit & new Garden of Ben They have no jewelry and no metals, and wear no more clothes than neces- #ary. But they do made ocloaks, aprons, Indians, — = ‘There is no death; for, each new d‘y 1 wake e larger life. to joy mots t. Bo Many times have'I been crucified the lon morn, n resu 3 phant, tho new Calvaries ‘“—and then with just a more of L And yet how impatient you are to be up and going. But it is now, when the sys- tem is trying to rebuild its store of energy, that you will be most grateful for the reconstructive help of Sanatogen. Sanatogen, you must know, is a natural food-tonic, combining purest albumen with organic phosphorus— thus conveying to the wasted system the vital elements to build up blood and tissues, and it is so remarkably delicate—young and beneficial effects. It reawakens the appetite, assists digestion, and as a physician in » a loading medical “It sesme to possess & wonderful effect in increasing the nutri- M. Olfoe Schreiner, thie giftod writer, stat “Nothing that taken fof y: ° verynervous and anmmic has been ereatly benefited g.y the p wed use of tunity to help bring back you—or some- one that is near and dear to you—to dreases, otc., of home-woven cloth, Intertwined with the bright-colored feath- ors of gorgeous macaw birds, which ex- eite the admiration of the civillsed visttor by their novelty and beauty. The women are described as resombling statues of polished bLronse of magnificent propor- tlons, while the men are well made and | Intellizunt 100kin, 1f, s Dr. Farabeo thinks, these Wai Wal Indiana, with the surrounding tribes, who resemble them in manners and appearance, reprosent a unlon of the remalns of the ancient Curibs and Arowaks, then the peacesble oharaater of the latter, who, before the coming of the Spaniards, had been sadly harssed by the war-like Cariba, has prevailed in the blending. There aré no wars among them now. They live on vegetables, truit and game; grind cassava with roughly hewed granite bolders and obtain fire with sparks from atrioken stones. Hpring Is thelr mating time, as with birds, and then they put on thelr beil- Hant garments, gleaming with the most exquisite hues of scariet, yellow and blue, and dance the “masheka,” or “pea- nut vine dance,”” An imitation of this dance was long ago produced in Brasil, being ploked up from the Indian tribes and carried down the Amason, and this was the origin of the “Maxixe,” a danocs which came to Amerion through Paris In the place where it was Invented this dance ia a rite of the mating season, as symbolical as the bacchic dances of the anclent Greeks. Those great mystery storfes of unl. ersal humanity, the legends of a pare- dive and a deluge, have been found again by Dr. Farabee in this almost inacoes- sible part of the world. The paradise story, as told by the Wal-Wals is in some respects more pleasing than the Hobrew account used by Mflton in his “Paradise Lost.” In the beginning, it #ays, the god Duwid, having made men and women, continued to feed them with his own hands, bringing them every day abundance of fruit and vegetables. In their idleness, the men and women found nothing more interesting to da than to watch the other animale. Thus they discovered that these animals went oft somewhere eovery morning and re- turned at night. Led by curlosity, they followed, and found a great tree which shed every day from its branshes both fruits and vegetables, on which the ani- fed. Here,” they said, “is where Duwid gets our food. Henceforth let us come and help ourselves, Then we shall not have to thank him for it Accordingly, they told Duwid that he need not take the trouble to bring them food any longer, for they had found out where to get it for themselves. “Very well,” aald the god, *“'but here- after you will have to work for it. To- morrow the tree shall be cut down, but, to save_you from starvation, I will give you a hint. Break off branches bearing oach kind of fruit and plant them in the ground. Water and tend them carefully and they will flourish and continue to bear abundantly as long as you continue to labor. They began to obey Duwid's instruc- tons, but, becoming wearied left off be- fore they had taken from the tree more than a small number of the infinite va- rlety of frults that it bore. Fortunately they got the cassava, but they have to work hard, not only to raise it, but to fit It for eating. The enormous stump of the grent tree, they say, still exists in the inldst of their gountry, in the form of & huge steep-sided rock, rising high above the roof of the forest. The Wal-Wals are deacribed as a very childltke race, but this legend of theirs 1s full of adult wisdom and & keen knowl- odge of human nature. It depicts the consequence of idleness and too indul. gent paternalism far more polntedly than the story in Genesls does, while alto- gether avolding the unnecessary inven- tion of the serpent as a tempter. The absence of vindictiveness 4n the god Duwid's sentence is also & notable "l Written ip bis aftractive manner and flied contentment, ht is FREE. rving 27 3.