Omaha Daily Bee Newspaper, July 16, 1888, Page 5

Fonaks TR G o AL DML it MR NEWS FOR TRAVELING MEN. Anecdotes end News For the Knights of the Bample Case. GRAND ISLAND RESOLUTIONS. The Boys Want One More “Horse" on Omaha—Traveling Men in Texas— A Murder — Pickering's Con- traot—Am ny the Boys, They Are Full of Fight. The residont wraveling men of Grand 1ls- land arose in their righteous lndlqnuon Just before the 4th day of July, when some un- suspecting but patriotiomember of their craft suggested that the traveling men present in Omaha on that day join the parads in uni- form. They even weut so far as to call upon the merchants of Grand Island to boycott any Omaha house which should take part in #ny such movement that might thus tend to draw in the least from the local celebration. The Omaha merchants and their traveling fim acceded 1o the desires of the Grand ls- aders and did abstain from any action on their part or participation in the © in Omuha. Tpe Grand Island were 80 overjoyed by the manner in” which they kept Omaha out of a local demonstration and by the success of the day 8t their own bome that at a weeting held Iast Monday night they passed the following very amusing resolution MKesolved, That while we are cognizant of the friendly foeling of this winor city toward Q’s groat metro, 1 the west (on account of our recent celebration), the traveling nen of Grand [sland retain an’ attitude of unre- lenting, unforgiving, unmagnanmous intol- erance, and we hereby solemnly proclaim that as long as life has passions the demon of war aud the spirit of hatred shall re supreme in each and every noble brea provided, however, that if on the Fourth of July in the year of our Lord, one thou- ind eight hundred and oithnmc, there all appear on the beautiful streets of the magnificent city of Omahe, twenty thousand traveling men leading the largest trades dia$ play cver seen, then this resojution is null and void, otherwise to remain in full force to the end of time. And be it further Resolyed, That a copy of these resolutions be furnished the mayor of Omaha, a8 8 fair and timely warning. The resolutions sound just like a jolly good T(wllllg of the boys. The members of the raternity can rest assured that there is ne city in the west that would give a grander welcome to the Lravollng men of the state in 1880 than Omaha and that there is no city in the state that can stand as big a crowd and enjoy as large a demonstration, The mayor will see a copy of your resolutions and will 0o doubt remember the 20,000 statement up against you. Traveling Men in Texas. M. O. A. Hotohkiss, of Dallas, Tex., in an article on the drummers in Teoxas, written in reply to some asticlen in the Alliauce organs, and showing the Denefits the state derives from her traveling men, says: “I'ive months in the year there are 7,000 commercial trav- elers in the stato of Texas; the remaining soven months there are 4,000. In the fall and spring thero are 7,000 who spend an average of $ a day each, or a total of 35,000, 81,030,000 a montn, 'and for the five months, 85,250,000, The remaining seven mouths there are 4,000 who at the same low average would spend £20,000 a day, $600,000 a month, and for the seven months, $4,200,000. Add this to the amount spent by the 7,000 in five months and we have the sum total of § 000 per annum, ““Phen there is the drummers’ license, hich, if collected, would amount to $245,000 direct revenue to the state. There are about chants now doing business in the as. 1£10,000 of these merchants were compelled to go to market twice a year and purchase goods, as they formerly did, at a cost of §2,000,000, end do away with the drummer system, the state would lose 80,450,000, besides the £2,000,000 tho mer- chants would necessarily spend in goi market, ng nothing of the §2 state derives from the drummor: ‘This would be very tough on the hotels, liv- ery stables, raironds, etc. (As iu is, the hotels are tough on us). “Just to give you an i¢ea of the hotol busi- ness. The Grand Windsor of this city and the Pickwick of Fort Worth will average each twenty drummers a day throughout the year at $2,50 per day. This amounts in each case $1,500 per month and §18,000 per annum from traveling men alone. From the above will be seen that tho drummers ocontribute five times as much to the prosperity of Texas "I"l,.l the ulliance organization is actually . Worth, A Traveling Man Killed. Daniel Smith, of Peacock, N. J., a travel- ing represoutative for & New York patent medicine company, was shot and instantly killed at Jackson, Tenu., recently in a fight with a man named Stovall. Smith had had soma worde with Mrs. Stovall and it was statod that he told her she had lied. Haland Rofilnald Stoval, Mrs. Stoval sons, came out of their room and asked Smith if he had ac- cused their mother of telling u lie. A scuffie ensucd, and Ann Wilson, of Yonkors, N.Y., a married duughterof Mrs, Bmith, rushod in and rabbed one of the young men. A running h&mwhm hall, out on the back porch, #ad into the dinning room followed. Thrae shots were fired, only one of which took effect. The ball, a large one, entered the top of Smith's head, passing downward, He staggered and foll out of the window on the ground, blood and brains oozing from the wound, The young men gave thenselyes up, and while it Is admitted “Hal fired the shot: :;ht:.hh killed Smith, both say they are equally me. 1y Smith was forty-seven years old aund leaves & wife and family. A Contract en Hand. The Merchunt Traveler in speaking editor- {ally of the outlook for the T. P. A. says: M. J. Pickering, the newly elected presi- aeat, has & mighty work 0 perform if he sue- ocends in saving the T, P, A. from fiual disso- lution. He takes charge of an mssociation which is virtwally bankrupt, §,500 in debt -and a dissatisfied membership to draw from. He is bandicapped by such unpopular and in- efficient men as Stone, Silverstono eval. It i8 t0o much of a load for any man to_carry. 1 his genius can get the association through the year perhaps another couvention will ‘be wise envaugh to elect ofticers who will be of assistance to him, but it is doubtful. Each succceding meeting grows more pruriont and disgraceful. The Minne- ;nolis meeting was two-thirds of the time a howling mob without aim or order, and_the report of the wmeeting shows that nothing wwas done. Most of the dolegates went, as they cxpressed it, to “have a good time,” and carcd very littlo whether the T. P, A, ~ dived ordied. They were all prepared 1o danco at the funeral. Tt is rather expensive fun for the rank and file to run an associa- tion ut an expense of §20,000 per year for the sakie of giving less than & hundred men a wock's recreation. ‘The membvership grows steadily 1evs, and who can wonder at it] Rustling For Customers. ‘The following short colloquy shows some of tho tricks of the drammer’s trade: *Which way do you got" “Up towards Lancaster and Harrisburg.” I go to Yarsey,' " I must skirmish to-morrow and hunt up lmpaknmr for the boys,” said & third Three traveling salesmen, all membors of the .ua..'fi«d outside the door of the association rooms, 163) Market st the other eveuing vmc l;!n]:ladehohmbufly ews man 0 £ y Were arranging to start in flmmdlrwv.m‘nal on lon; trrn-‘or the‘l‘r hot ind one of them kindly undertook to ‘explain what he meaut by providing “snaps’’ for the hoys. *“You see 1t pleases our customers to show them the latest novelties when we visit their store, und we aim w&'nl around and speud o Tow dollurs \m‘yuag a1 up bofore we loave h lunno:&lm this,” Hehiod L) over to a store window, took & small picce of rubbar from his pooket, wet one 'hnuukn on the nss ) lly L hyt on the object. . SR 0 window when traw Syt ) Jar hook for your hat er w'&.“m.n'l“ povket, It catches the merchant.” The salesman then displayed a scarfpin ke askull, and by pressi button oo his vest a tongue ran ouf and the eyeballs rolled in it. He had a cane, the top of which opened by touchings spring and & tiny wax taper was revealed, while touching another spring a match-safe flew out of the side of l.gs cane. He had a patent pair of eyeglasses that made men seem to be standing on their heads. He took from his coat ‘)ock.t a funny cigar case, a pocketbook that let your bank- notes, if lucky enough to have any, disappear ‘when placed in a compartment. fl.“] :l:‘tnu.k y 'npe:i 1l f the goods, reet that makes 8 specialty of and they are generally, or, at least, at first, imported from Paris; but after a few are brought over inventive Yaukees eoon imi- tate. You can form but a small idea of how this helvs me make sales,” he concluded, as his friends prepared to move down street. part just rm it 1oose and stick it in your vest Thirty Thousand Against a Broncho. A traveling man was discussing politics at the Kennard house in Cleveland the other day and related the following story of a hotel man’s bet: ‘‘United States Senator Stock- bridge,” said he, ‘‘was in Detroit a few days ago, and stopped at the Russell house, of which W. J. Chittenden, a prominent demo- crat, is the proprietor. The senator, attired in @ bran now suit of gray, formed one of o group of gentlemen in the eorridor of the hotel before dinner, and, the conversation turning on politics, some one asked him if he iked the republican ticket. ‘I should say ( did like it," replied the senator. ‘We will catry evoy northern state, and gain two or three congressmen in Michigan,! Mr, Ch tenden laughed at this, und the laugh was about 9 per cent sarcasm. This stirred up Senator Stockbridge, and he said ‘I'll tell you what I wiil do, Chittenden. I'll just bet you the best horse I own against a broncho that Harrison will be the next president of the United States.’ ‘That's a good bet,’ re- plied CHittenden, ‘and I will take it,’ at the same time booking the wager. Both are men of their word in such matters. Senator Smckbri\ige‘n best horse is a stallion valued at §30,000." He Was from Iowa. George Smith and Will Brown are two names that are as good as any to use in the narration of an incident, says an exchange, in which well known and popular Cincinnati traveliug men recently fizured. Brown's remark of ‘‘Come and havea drink” was what led to the embarrassing sit- uation that ensued. “Certainly,” was the prompt response. “By the way,"” said Brown, after he had prudently thrust his hand inio his pocket; *you'll have to take beer.” ““Take beer!" “Yes, I just discovered that I've only got 15 centa.” “Oh, I sce," They stepped into tho bar room, and s a matter of form Brown inquired: *‘Whav'll you take, Smith “‘I think 1’1l take s mint julep,” responded mith without changing a muscle, A which?” “A mint julep.” “What'll you take!” inquired the bar- keeper of Brown. “‘Me!” said Brown, with pensive sadness, “I think I'll take a glass of water.” The Drummer's Rebuke. The following very interesting account. is given by the New York Tribung of the way a local traveling man rebuked a tailor for having his check certified: “August Gross, a traveling ugent for Charles Scribner's Sons, ordercd a suit of_clothes from L. 8. Pakas, a tailor, of No, 749 Broadway, a short time ago, and paid for it in_advance' with a check, Pakas wont to the bank and had the check certified, Mr. Gross did not like that manuer of treating his check and called on the tailor at his store and told him so. BHe- fore he left the place Gross broke an ebouy cane over the tailor’s head, inflicting three scalp wounds, splitting opon his lip and blacking both eycs. The tailor says the as- sault was unprovoled, and he had Mr. Gross arrested and arraigned in the Harlem court the next day. Gross says he did not assau!t Pakas until Pakas shook his fist in_his fuce and had hold of him by the coat collar, He says hio refrained from attacking the tailor until assaulted himself, bocause o knew ho could thrash Pakas and did so as thoroughly a8 he knew how when Lo was forced to do it. Gross was held in $500 bail by Justice Gor- man for trial.” ‘What the Boys See. A commercial traveler writing to the St. Paul Globe over the nom de plume Yuot says of their profession and work: There is no 1ife so full of incidents as the life of the com- mercial traveler in his daily rounds from town to town. He sees everybody, hears everything good, he puts up at u poor hotel or @ good one, rides on freight trains, making long and tedious trips, meeting different characters, and a hundred and one other things which would be of interest to the public and a real benefit to o number of com- mercial travelers and _their friends, 1 hope the boys will take hold of this matter and contribute a little whenever possible. It is pot a feature of the commercial travelers to let anything lag that bears their name., So come to the front and fire off your wit and wisdom that the world and the boys may be benefited by it. A Good Man Going Wrong. The story has gotten out among the boys that Ed L. Shepherd, with Dodson, Fisher & Brockmann, Minneapolis, one of the most popular and best known traveling men on the road, will be united in marriage on the 18th inst. to Miss Breen, of Cleveland, O., a lady of great beauty, and one of the leading belles of “her native city. After spendin woeks east ho will return with his bride to Fargo, where he will muke his home. Mr. Shepherd has the good wishes of all the boys and ‘will no doubt be substantially remein- bered on that great day by mauy of thom. TAKING IN A TOWN. The Fighters Who Traveled Together and Took in Strangers. “While I was traveling through Texas for a New York notion house,” says a writer in the Philadelphia North American, * I had a chance to see many things which you seldom see in the cast. In October, 158—, I landed in Galveston for the first time, and being somewhat of a ‘boy about town, I concluded 10 ‘take in’ the town that might. So, closely pocketing the §100 note I had for expenses, I started out, and the first place I ‘struck’ was a well known sporting resort on — street. T shall never forget it, for the very next day I had to part with' my gold vepeater at a_sacrifice 10 meet gurrent expenses, Well, to coutinue, I walked boldly up to tho bar, ordered drinks all around, and the com- pany was about saying, ‘Your health, stranger,’ when the door wis open, und iu strode the bigges ever' saw in my life. Ho roared ou you dhrink dat_to de Dutch chiant’s healdt or I'll glean dis d——d blace oud, sooner as quick.” Maype you dond know me. Vell, [ shust tell you who Ipe. 1 pe de Duteh chiant, and can lig all de mans in Texas for #8100 to 3 §1,(00.” He glared at us as if ho intended to devourus together whon it suited him. He was a finely built follow, standing about six feot fl:fie i:;l‘ncl:kbmd shoulders, ight Limbs, very appearance od his threat.” X No one had apparently noticed a little Trish- man about five feet seven and a half inches in height, who had been sitting in one cor- ner of the room, until he carelessly walked up to the big Dutchman and said: “Phat the divil do f'ou mane by making so doomed much noise! 1f yer want ter fight fer ‘ducats’ 'm yer man, and will fight ye with bare knuckles for & thousand dollavs.” *Mine Gott in himmel, shust you listen to dat baby,” said the Dutchman. “Vell, I wyuu L lig you in fife minutes,” “Well, you won't lick me at all, atall,"said the plucky little Irishman. A ring was soon formed in a back room, a referee chosen and both put up §1,000 each. Before the fight commenced the Irishman said: *I will take any reasonable bots that [ lick him in thirty “minutes.” Everybody thought him crazy, and everybody wanted to ‘bet him. He got all sorts of bets—three to one. and in some cases he bet even money. Betting ran h fi:mm $100 to $500 by each individual. The fight commenced, and it was a bloody fight from first to last. It was cloarly seen that the Irishman was the better scienced of the two. The fight lasted twen- -five minutes, when, with ‘a well-directed blow, straight from the shoulder, the Irish- man doubled the Dutchman wup in the corner. When time was be did respond. he - Irishman walked ‘carelessly out of the saloon, taking with him lzfio clear winner of$3,100, not counting t tchman's $100. Ieaw them. tivice on the samoé trip afterward, once in San Antonio and once in Laredo, ting, as usual, and each time the Dutchman was “licked.” Why shou'dn't he, when he got more than $1,000 for each “licking." hen 1 met them in Laredo I ‘4wigged” their game, They traveled togather, but as strangers. In each town they would select the ‘‘moneyed” sporting resort, and would meot there as strangers, kick up & row between themselves and offer to fight for any amount of money. Of course the bets were in most every in- stance made by the Irishman on himself, and avery time he walked away with the cash. Oh, yes! I got my $100 back and 8500 more they gave me not Lo ‘‘squeak’’ Omaha's Sunday Guests, At the Millard—L. B. Helbe aud H. 8. Raymond, Chicago; L C. Burdick and L. J. Stepbens, Mason City, Ia.; M. C. Bristol, Clicago; D. F. Eiseuhart, New York: E. A. Cummings and O. H. Willinms, Chicago; H. B. Barney, New York; P, E. Stretnan, Chi- cago; J. P. Foley, Lockport, N. Y.; J. A. Ham, Chicago; W. G. Condon, Kansas City; Samuel M. Schwartz, Philadelphia; William N. MeKinlock, Chicago; H. Hahn, Louisville; H. W. Loomis, Hai L. ‘Gere, Chi- Everett, Milwaukee; J. C.' Corn- ago; A. L. Campbell, Ransas City; tar, Chicago; M. Jambe, St. Louis: W. A, Learned, Northampton, LW, Alexander and J. O. Bérg, C. C. Fitzmaurice, A. W. Butts, C. J. lush, J. F. Moore, J. H. Moses and C. P. Rorback, Chicago; Edwin Glow, St. Louis; G. W. Wheeler and_Joln West, Chicago: J. B; Dutcher, Now York; Edward Bliven, Chicago; C.' Dopriner, St. Joe: J. F. Mo Sween, Minneapolis; E. W. Hananer, Phi delphia; H. d. Trucsdell, Boston; John Keane, Now York; Thomas H. Doane, cago; A. E. Tricy, Boston; D C. Shand, San Francisco; J. C. Shand, New York: S. Jumos Springef and Georze' L. Carrington, New York, At the Paxton—Horace Wood, St. Joseph; A W. Wicting, Miluaulkee; Fred F. Fank, Chicago; L. Ullrech, New York; E. J. Seeley, Denver; Chaxles J. F. Rittor, Now York;' Harry L. jferd, Quincy; George Clowder, Minneapolis; 8. B. Greiff, New York; N. A. Duff and H. N, Carpentér, Sy- racuse; C. W. Chadbourne, Boston; Daniel Cohen, Now Orleans; Frank D, Zug, Car- bsle, 'Pa; M. D. Galloway, Phila- deiphia; ~ H. B, Hachmay, j Louis; = Sim Rewak, New ' York: P. Cristie, Toronto; E. Heath, jr., Now York; Edward W. Penfield, Chicago; Ewing Herbert, Hiawatha, Kan.: ' John E, McGea. Minneapolis; M, Horton, Chicago; H. J. Can- non, St. Louis: C. A. Dage: B, Nelson, Chicago; Phil Bohnn, New York; G. Lehr: berg and D, Hirsh, Chicago: J. N. Hickok aud D, 8. Clark, New York; J. A. Landers, Louis: 'Joe M. ' Carey, New L. Roso, . Chicago; William_T. Haarstich, St. Louis; O. E. Moore, San Francisco: 'John Kongldson, St. Louis: William Wadsworth, Davenport; M. Schiller, New York; Ed Gailegher, Chicago} W. A. Wade, Boston: E. C. Dawmeron, St. is; H. R. Cutler, Boston: J.W. Torrénce, Keokuk; F. G. Thomas, Chicago; C. J. Wal Lis, New Oricans; William_ C. Bodmax, Ch cago; James Gallagher, New York; 1. G. Wildinan and I, B, Hooker, Chicegos C. N. Porter, Cheyeno. Samples. S. D. Wadsworth has not his “‘dancing clothes" with him, but is still plugging with his usual tenacity for Deere, Wells & Co. in central Nebrasks and is having a good trade. K. H. Israel, formerly with the L. M. R sey manufacturing company, of St. Lo has rotired from the road and has been ceeded by Mr. T. J. Tigan, who cove: territory of Nebraska, Colorsdo, Wy and Utah. S. B, McEldowney, of Walker, St. Joseph,waus havi; arth, 'si v he has i ity to sell dry goods Overland RRoute” to good effect. The genial representive of Blake, Bruce & Co., Omaha, 1n the person of L. C. Beobe, is known to the te, His smiling countenance and nave been recognized among th drug merchants in western Nebr past week. Frank Buchheit, with McCord, Brady & Co. of Omaha, begun perspiring on the Fourth, and is still keeping it n; present his 200 pounds many customera in prope good effect. He just succeede 4 nice opeuing order in Kearncy ‘I'. B, Harlan representing the Consolidated Tank Line of Omaha, b of the Union Pacific Ve with flat- success. The ing and reaping nes will be taxed to their utmost to st the abundant grass and grain pro- his year and T. B. is having a picnic on the lubricators just now. For the past four years Edson, Keith & Co., of Chicago, have been represented in Ne- braska by the sociable Mr. W, H. Case,whose smiles always predominato upon his counte- uauce, an index of his happy disposition. F enjoys a splendid trade and is greatly desery- ing of it. His home and heart are with his estimable wife in Fremont. Among the many enei and _enterpris- ing commergial travelers there are nono more deserving of success than Mr. N, H. Cohen, of Grand Island. Cohen manufactures his own goods, baving in his employ some twelve or wore first-class cij akers. The immense trade he uuh{ high com- plimentary to his busiuess qual tions. His brands are well known and always called for by the traveling fraternity. C. A. Diamond, the popular emissary of Steele & Walker, St. Joseph, with his sister, Mrs. H. S, Keith of North Platte, returned a few days ago from Mankato, Minn., w! they spent the week of the Fourth enjo; the boating, fishing and bathing pies ures of guke Madison. with parents, brothers and sisters in family reunion. Since his vacation Cal has entered upon his duties with renewed vigor, and his usual good suc- cess has been increased. sl Of All Things in the World A tonic is what nervous people require. To impart strength into the nervous organism is to iusure its tranquility, provided causes of unhealthful excitement are avoided. A wed- ical tonic like that—like Hostetter's Stom- ach Bitters—pommands _the unqualified sanction of the healing profession, aud which institutes a general reform in a bilious, dy peptic and debilitated condition of our sy tem, 18 surcly entitled to a careful trial intelligent people, capable of forming a due estimate of a medicine from emphatic and often recorded professional evidence in its behalf. Not only are the nerves and stom- ach invigorated by the Bitters, but the sy tewm is also endowed with unwonted power of resistance to the influences in air, water or daily wuvocation subversive of health. Prominently dangerous among the first named of these is malaria, against which Hostetter's Stom Bitters affords a com- petent safeguard. Rheumatism and kidney }mublus arc also prevented and overcome by t. o —— Miut julep goes well with the ther- mometer at 90 degrees. To make it you must have real, old fashioned gar- den miut, frosh, tender, and above all, unbruised. Into each glasss put four lumps of sugar and ice water to cover them. Stir till the sugar is soft, then half fill the glass with best Bourbon or Tennessee whisky, put mint in a circle all around the edge, and fill heaping full with ice broken to the size of a wal- nut. For hailstorm take ice and sugar in equal parts, shake together for a minute, pour in whisky to cover it and add, if approved, a squeeze of lemon or any other fruit flavor. i An Absolute Cure. The ORIGINAL ABIETINE OINTMENT s only put up in large two ounce tin boxes, and s an absolute cure for old sores, burns, wounds, chapped han1s, and_ all skin erup: tions, ill positively cure all kinds of piles. Ask for the ORIGINAL ABIETINE O?N . MENT. Sold by Goodmaa Drug Co. at £5 ‘vents per box—by wail 80 cents. ——— A Story About Washington, There is an unpublished story of ‘Washington, told by the descendant of the ancestor who is in the story, which cepresents the great general in the pleasant family life we have all liked to contemplate, and not as the grand maa and the hero av the head of his army, It was when Washington, after the revo- lutionary war, was traveling through Couuect{cut and visited flfl'&rfl, stay- Continental House 'I.a’rgesl Clothing House West of the Mississippi River. Clothing EXPRESS ORDERS. We will send packages containing suits of clothing, cloths and woolens of all kinds kept in our establishment, to any address in Nebraska, Iowa, Dakota, Colorado, Kansas and Wyo- ming C. O. D,, giving buyers the privilege of examining goods before paying for them. By this arrangement people living in distant towns can obtain every advantage of seeing any atticle ot merchandise in our stock at their own towns, examining the same before paying for the m*and if not verfectly satisfactory, returnine goods to us at ourexpense. Money for all amounts ex- ceeding $10 may be returned at our expense. TRY THIS ARRANGEMENT. For years we have sent goods all over the United States in this manner by express with the most satisfac- tory results. You take no risk. Examine the zoods, and return them at our expense if they do not please you. FREELAND, LOOMIS & CO., Corner 15th and Douglas Streets, - - Omaha, Nebraska ing at the Bull’s tavern there. A boy came into the kitchen of the tavern and said: I want to see, General Wushing- ton.” The functionary.on duty did not pro- pose to let any mere boy see Goneral Nashington merely for the asking, and said as much, 5 “‘But I have a note for him,” remon- ed the b “Irom whom m N . Chief Justice Ellsworth.” “Oh—w and the functiona re- lented. General Washington read the note and said to the boy: **Your father invites me to dinner, I will do more than that, I will go and brealkfast with him.” And he did the next morning. And kfast e ook the twin sons of o cach on a knee and sang thom the “Derby Ram,” an old English bailad beginning: "It was on a mar- 4hé otting forth that the ttam of Derby was 80 big that the bivds bnilt nests in the wool on his back and the butcher who undertook to kill him was drowned in the blood. s Aduda Th Jse Dr. Jones’ Rea Clover ¢ never have dyspepsia, costive- ss, bad breath, piles, pimples, ague and malaria, peor appetite, low spirits, headache or kkidney troublés. Price 50 cents. Goodman F L ‘Wouldn't Suit Her, A well-known theatrical manager in the city says the San Francisco Chron- icle, has just gone to housckeeping. He has a cuufi whose only fault is that she despises the theater.” It hurts his feel- ings, but she’s n great cook and an ex- cellent servant, But he can’t get her 10 go to his theatar. She turns up her nose at seats inthe dress circle, and even a private box has no temptation for her. The other day the mistress asked her if she did not want to seea play. y PXo, av you plase, T don’t care for it at all, at all.” “I will give youtwo nice seats, and you must get a friend and go.” “An’ sure, ma'am, what for should I go? To see them make love and flop over and die. Sure, ma'am, it would make me sick to my stowach, gn’I wouldn’t be fit for any work for two days after it, ma'am,” P I like my wife to use Pozzoni’s Com- lllexmu Powder begause it improves her ooks and is as fragrant as yiolets. No Chair For Her. An opera singer, once well known, but living quietly in Brookiyn justnow, found that her income as music teacher needed pieeing out, so she applied for the position of ehoir singer in a local church. The chairman of the music committee asked her if she could read music. She believed she could—at all event she would try. So, taking the score that was handed to her, she stood beside the organ and began to sing. As her voice swelled through the church the committee sat silent and wondering, but when she had flnished the chairman sprang forward and said: ‘‘Oh, no, madam, we can not engage you.” “I'm so sorry,” she answered;**I would like to come.” “*Impossible,” said the chairman. “But I will sing fora little. I will come for $1,000. “Ah, madam, we give our leading so- prano only §300.” ¢ She did not join-the choir, — Nipped in the Bud, Is it not better to nip Consumption, the greatest scourge of humanity, in the bud, than to try to stay its progress on the brink of the grave. A few doses of California’s mgst useful rroflucuon, SANTA ABIE, tfhe king of Consump- tion, will relieve, and a thorough treat- ment will cure. Nasal Catarrh, too of- ten the forerunner of consumption, can be cured by CALIFORNIA CAT-R- CURE. These remediesare sold and fully warranted by Goodman Drug C at 81, or three for On the *Make-Up.” Mme. Ristori says: *I have always been of the opinien of Mlle, Clarion that the less paint or powder an actor or actress employs, the better.” It will be remembered that we quoted this famous nctress of the eighteenth cen- turay, who was so opposed to the use of lards and greases, powders and paints, that she scarcely “made.up” atall, Mme. Ristori continues: “I therefore never employed any means beyond those absolutely necessary to bring out the characteristics of ihe personage T was representing.” Here ‘we mus{ observe that it has been given {0 fow artists to possess the peculiarly and beau- titul features of Mme. Ristori, which so readily lent themselves to the ideal representations of heroic and historical Her noble face required but little make-up to give us a complete idea of what a Medea or a Myrtha Indeod, few painters would care for a finer model; and so mobile was her expression that the least alter- her headdress changed her countenance completely into at least an idenl picture o Tts superlor excollence proven in millions of homes for more than a quarter of a century. It 18 used by the United States Government, 'Ep- dorsed by the hoads of the KIeat purest’ and most aking Powder does not contain ammonia, lime or alum, Sold only in cans. INTERNATIONAL EXHIBITION Industry, Science and n Until October, 1888, Jongress Meets Au GLASGOW, SCOTLA. ATE LINE, For iuformation apply to AUSTIN, BALDWIN & CO., Agts., 53 Broadway, New York. PEN ROYA PRy perbox by hall.or s Thallor Srtiouiard’? posage dm:m Sealed ps. y mail by Goodman Tas For sale and b, Drug Co,, Ommaha, Neb, JOSEPH GILLOTTS STEEL PENS GOLD MEDAL PARIS EXPOSITION 1878, Nos, 303-404-170-604. JUDICIOUS AND PERSISTENT Advertising has always proven #uoccesstul. Before placing Newspaper Advertising con: LoAD. & THOMAS, FOUNTAIN FINE OUT AND 1W§. ..l;‘LUO .fi'u-l"l ©. POWLER, Moodus, Gonn, | MEN ONLY “& 00., BUFFALO, itk Slomache And Constipatien. By TARBANT'S SELTZER APERIENT. ity Hiad Quickly Cured. BY TARRANT'S SELTZER APERIENT. vwe CHICAGO Ave ORTH- N VWESTERN RAILWAY. Council Blufis And Chicago. The only road to take for Dos Molnos, Marshaltown Cedur Hupids, Clinton, Dixon, Oicago. 3 Wi A1l oS Kast. 10 tho phople oF Fadon W oiaing Ui, Lanbot Newadn, Orogan, Wash Titon und Calitornin, 1t offera superior advAntagos B0} possibla by Any Other ine. Atbons a faw of Eho nuIMOrous potnts of superlority onoyed by the patrons Of this road Dotwech Omuha B Chlcigo. Wro ite. thirao trains & 4ay of DAY SOACH IS, Whioh 40 the Anest that h {nzenulty can cronte. 18 PALACE SUEBPING CAIKS, % cquinl of which cannot bo found ersowhore: At Coundil B, tho trana of the Union Pucific Ratl wWay connoct I union depot with thoso f tho Ohi: o & Nortuwestorn By. In Ohioago tho trains of ihis line muke olose conneotion with thoso of il otior Bastorn 1ex. ¥or Botrol, Gotombug, Tnaian spolis, Clocionatt Nlugorn kails, Butiulo, Diiabary. Taronto. Montro Boskort Ko Fork: Pliudemnta, Baitiniore, W A1 ponts (B tho ast. Ask 10r toketsvie NORTH-WESTERN" It you wian the best. wccommodation. Al okt HENBAC v . P. WiLSON. ‘Genl Mannger. Gonl Pase't Agent. GimoAqo, 111, W. N. BADCOGK, Hon i Wesien G ¥ WEST 1401 Farnam St., Omaha, Neb, (HICACD SHORT LINE Chicago, lllwaukL& St. Paul Ry, The Best Route from Omahs and Council Blufls to —==THE EAST==-— UWO TRAING DAILY BETWEEN OMAHA AND COUNCIL BLUS¥S —AND— Mitwauki polis, Cedar Magdison, Janesville, Winona, La Cresse, Aad oll other Important w East, Nortbeast and Bor ol it. s st Lo Backer Hock.of e Lafn Badge Dflfi!‘nm Sloepers and th Piniog Gags iy world 8P ruly O3 She AL o5, Foit mEk i i b iy L1 Ma r. R e e M&‘fi ig\?fi::’wn. Assistant Genoral Passeoger 3.2 ‘Generel Superintandeat. UNION PACIFIC “The Overland Route,” Has so arranged its Family Sleepin Car service, that berths can now be re served uggn Agpllmmnn by any ticket agentto M. J. Greevy,Passcnger Agent, Council Bluffs, Iowa. The reservations when made are turned over to the train conductors taking out such cars,so that suaengerl can now secure berths or- ered, the same as a Pullman berth is reserved and secured. J. 8. TEBBETS, E. L. LOMAX, GenP. & T. nt. Ass'tG. P &P, otk SIAHA, NED. SteclgPiano (PO A Ooncentrated Liquid Bxtract of MALT snd HOPS, Aids Digestion, Cures Dyspepsia, Strengthens the System, Restores Sound, Refreshing Sleeny Priceless to Nursing Mothers, Rocommeadsd by Emineat Physicass, For Sale by all Druggists and Rich< ardson Drug Co.‘.“l:'homuk Drug- yists, Health i3 Wealth i PR 2 R S mbuo i, Involunt: DRTAT -~ 00 of 7 wail prapaid ga rer WE GUARANTES SIX BOKES 5 us_ for boxes, mlxflm'“ [l o o sshasey, ok itien ST p LR, S Stroet. ON 30 DAYS' TRIAL. pe. wit 3 (e g e T :'C% ma ot FLORESTON. SOLOGNE,' EXHAUSTED VITALITY 'l‘!mfllo’ml,m great Medical Work of the oonsequent theroon, %0 pages 8vo, 135 ‘Pprescriptions for all disoases. Cloth, full giit, only $1.00, b) mall, sealed. Tlustsative sample tree to all young and middle-aged men. Send now. The Gold and Jewalled Medal awarded to the author by the Na- #lonal Medical Assoclation. Address P, O, box 16%, Boston, Mass., or Dr. W. H. PARKELR, grad uatoot Harvard Medioal Collego, 23 yoars' practioe in Bostoh, who may be consulted confidentially Spectalty, Diseases of Man. Offioc No, 4 Pulnchat | ANYYEAKMAN VITAL TABLETS bttty B