Omaha Daily Bee Newspaper, April 29, 1888, Page 14

OR BETTER OR FOR WORSE. Mm Succees Wlth the Matrimo- nial Bureau. 'FOIBLES OF MEN AND WOMEN. [all, & Tynn, Mass., Clars Leader, Held Up by His Deserted Wife— Youthfal Matrimonial Mistakes. Relative Values, Josephine Pellard in Harpers Magaziney 8o Jim has retired from bachelor life And married a widow. Why nott d Do tell the about it; I'm anxious to know . What sort of o wife he has got. | Bhe's worth twenty thousand, you say. A clare, " That's a stroke of gnod fortune for Ji Worth twenty—. Whet's thati Say it over once more, “She’s worth twenty thousand—of him. 1de- Love Grown Greater. Life. Youn should not say my love's grown less; It really is not true; o only said so—come, confess— Because you're feeling blue.” #Well, greater, then. About a word ‘Why make sc much ado! Your love’s grown lfir«:lm‘r, for I've heard You love my rive " A Doubly Married ZCouple. . Chieago Times: A dispatch from * Lynn, Mass., says: The officers of St. Paul’s Methodist church were treated 10 a story yesterday about one of their members—Howard Hall, of Union court ~which rivals in romance the tale of " Enoch'Arden. A well dressed woman ~ of fifty, with her son,a man named ~ Hawkes. o painter, in Summer- ville, ‘waited upon one or two of the number, and stated that her name was Hawkes, and that she was the wife of Robert Huwkes, ‘who she believed was drowned in Nova Scotin twenty-seven years ago, but whoms he had found alive in the flesh in theperson of Howard Hall, wh o has been a devoted class leader in the chure ind a member for some years. The woman said she married Hawlkes, alias Hall, in a little town in Nova Bceotia, at the age of swect sixteen. They fived together in pleasant wed- lock for four years and nine months, until one afternoon, when Hawkes left his pretty home to go and see his moth- Jer-in-lJaw. A river, deep and wide, flowed between their domiciles. Hawkes disappeared. Search was made, but he could not be found. At last it was be- lieved that he was drowned. The wife was left to struggle alone with two boys, and subsequently a third son, who was born in the month of March in which Hawkes left. For twenty-four genrs the wife mourned her husband. he got a place to work in Boston in 1872, but sent her savings home to her - children. One boy died, but the cldcst and youngest sury ived and grew UK man's estate. Three years ago Mrs ' Hawkes married again. In the summer of 1887 a man came into the ‘\Imn Scotia village. sash and blind manufacturer. ‘‘Hello, John Hawkes, father.” * Mr. Hawkes know him, and he “My father is dead.” The man stuck toit,and Mr. Hawkes said he would have no more todo with him. The stranger went his way. A little laterin the year, Mr. Hawk of Somerville, was seen by a man who called him hy name, and claimed he was his father. Mr, Hawkes replied, as his brother had, that his father was dead. The man said he wasn’t. Mr. Hawkes sought out his mother. From his story she recognized her long-iost husban She went to a lawyer, and, after gcuing counsel, left her second husband, Then she suffered from sick- ness for many months, On getting bet- er she set out with her Somerville sont in search of his father. Yesterday she traced him to Lynn. She went up to the little house on Union court, and there she saw Howard Hall. She rocogmzcd him at once. There was a pretty lively circus. Hall got on his ear at once. His name was Hall, and it was not Hawkes. He had but one wife, and she and his three children were living with him. He threatened to knock his son from Somerville down. Mrs. Hall objected and advised him to be quiet, She wanted to know ‘‘what woman she had seen him with the night before.” Hall is charged with ogling the girls from the steps of his uphol- stery store on Union st Mrs. Hawkes got no satisfaction and went to the church officers, They ad- vised her to see the city marshal, and she saw Mr. King this morning. De- tective Rowe took the case. The grand sequel may follow. A Boy Bridegroom. New York Sun: An extraordinary divorce suit recently settled in the Lon- don courts brought out a very remark- able story which led to the divorce which has been granted by Justice Butt o a petitioner. Richard D. Fisher has only just reached his twenty-first year. He™ was sent in 1878, when not twelve ears old, to the boarding school of Mr. all, at St. Leonard’s, months afterward an improper intimarv sprang up between the youthful Lothario and Emly Kate, the daughter of Mr, Gall, the nr(nc(pul At the end of 1881 Fisher went from Gall’s school to King’s col- e. Emily Kate came to London to him, and told him she was threat- ened with disgrace through him, and it would be only honorable in him to mary her, Fisher, who was only fif- teen, concented, and they were married by ial 1icense, the clergyman being a relative of the girl. At that time, as the evidence showed, the husband’s financial resources con- sisted entirely of one shilling a week. which his father allowed him as pocke money. This he was obliged to spend % keep up his dignity at school, and the {oung woman was obliged to maintain he baby. When the marriage was dis- covered by the boy’s l;}u nts in 1884 he was packed off to the United States, and he remained there studying med: until last Decemb On his return he found that a second child had been born, of which he couldn’t possibly have been the father, and he brought suit lor divorce in consequence. The judge rightly blamed the clergyman who mar- ried the couple, and condemned Fisher tosupport the first child,Yor which he is responsible. Landing a Sturgeon, Tray Standard: ‘‘Mamma, dear,” n Albany girl the other day, upeul\mg in the tone of gentle, loving wnfidenoe that is always so charming to see between a mother and daughter, $I—T—think George Sturgeon intends asking me to behis wife to-night. What § ay it ha doost” (durliu;z." eried the fond mother, clasping her loved one to her bosom, $Must you ask me-—must you ask any one—what to say at such a time? Be uided entirely by the dictates of your wh heart. Ask your heart if you love Mm. What does my ,darling’s heart ’W.ll mamma,” said the ma\duu, nsively, it scems to be kind o’ strad- e of the fence, and don't know which . way to ulnble, but, on the whole, I guess George is about as good a fish as I THE OMAHA DAILY BEE: am erly to h\nd, 80 I'd betler haul him in, hadn’t 1¥" “My sweet,"sald the ng]luwd mother. tearfully, ‘I reckon you The Ruling Passion. Boston Budget: There is a story told of a Boston attorney who, on the eve of being married, found it impussible to renrg the npmhslmi place, nad tele- graphed for a ‘“‘stay of pmvhc(lnuzn. the legal phraseolngy of the dispatch proving that even at such an eventful time the deciple of Blackstone and Coke could not shake off the verbal fet- ters of the law. The Test of a Good Husband. Smithville (Ga.) News: A colored man living near Smithville forbade his daughter to receive the attentions of a darky who was visiting her, Some time before this the old man had ex- pressed a desire for o certain kind of slow which he had seen, but said he didn’t have the money to buy it. The youthful Romeo purchased the plow and presented it to him. “It's all right about the plow,” snid the old man. ‘‘Now go out dl\r in de field an’ hitch dat mule to it an’ go to work. It's de only way you can get my gal. I tell you 1t’s ‘follow de mule’ wid me ebery time.” A Sad St Story. Phitadelphia Press, The day had come, the wedding feast was spread, But w?s 1mfl. touched, the guests went homo unfed. The bride-elect wept tears of wrath and shame-— The bridegroom that she looked for never came. The absent groom, a youth of good repute, Had called a boy to bring his wedding suit. Long years have passed, but still, with eyes of flame, He's waiting for that boy that never came. To Fond of Matrimony. Philadelphia Record: One of the pe- culiar marriages by Rev. J. J. Sleeper, of Camden, came out yesterday at a hearing before Magistrate Pole, of Wil- liam T. Johnson, an mgMuen-yeur-old colored boy, whose besetting sin, ac- cording to his father, is his passion for matrimony. Young Johnson, whose home is with his father at No. 928 La- fayette street, first indulged his passion last summer, when he was married to a young colored girl by Mr. Sleeper at his establishment in Camden. The youth- ful couple lived together about three monts, whenfthey separated. Johnson had no trouble in finding another girl ready to share_his fortunes, and very soon after the separation he madé an- other visit to Camden and returned with wife No. 2. He succeeded in keeping from his father all knowledge of this bigamous transaction until Friday. When the elder Johnson learned of it he took his son in hand and marched him to the Fifth district police station,where Lieu- tenant Usilton lockedfhimup. At the hearing yesterday the father made the charge of bigamy against his son, and the boy was held 1n 81,000 bail for an- other hearing on Tuesday next. An effort will be made to procure the pres- ence of his two wives at that time. At the time of his arrest young Johnson was not living with either of them. He Likes His Luck. On the 22d of \[m‘ch last the Globe- Democrat (St. Louis), item relating to the city of Mr. S. C. Tunlml of county, Mo., to Mrs. P.P. Miller, al- leging that the match hx\(l been made through a matrimonial agency, and that the parties had never seen each other until they met in St. Louis. We have just received the following good natured letter from Mr. Tucker. We regret that he has been bothered so much by requests for his experience, ete., but this is only a reasonable result of the abounding circul n_of the Globe-Democrat. Here is Mr. Tucker’s letter in full: TuAYER, Oregon County, Mo., April 20, 1888, —Some time ago you_published an ac- countof my marriage to Mrs. Miller, at the Merchants’ hotel, in St. Louis, March'21,giv- ing me a very complimentary notice, and at the same time writing me down for a fool. 1 had intended to pay no attention to the state- ment given by you, but to let it pass as a lit- tle sensation at my expense; but circum- stances have changed my views in regard to it, and now [ wish you to letme tell your readers the exact truth in regard to the mat- v, T was well acquainted with Mrs, Miller. and understood fully her social standing and family connection; but having made it a rulo of my life to keep my own counsel, and wish- ing to avoid publicity, I made a mistake in not hunting up a reporter and telling him the old, old story of old hearts warmed over,and s was brought about, saving litting work so kindly done in our behalf by said reporter, Mrs, Miller knew me and my family, and was well cnough satisfled with our standing to unite her fortunes with mine. Of our past lives and our present condition, financially and socially, let it suffice that we are mutually leased with the present, and trust that the ture will not bring us anything to disturb what we arc now very sure will be content- ment. My reason for asking you to give this statement is this: 1 have been getting letters and postals from about every stute in the union, and one from Nova Scotia, asking for information in regard to “how to get a wife," and I am getting tired, and wanting it dis- tinctly understood that I am not in the mar- riage brokerage business, for money or fame, and knowimg thet the Globe-Democrat is read everywhere, ask you to let this follow the noticé given us o generously in March, 8. C. TUCKER, He Got a Room. Rochester Democrat: A few days ago a gentleman from Fresno registered at ono of the principal hotels in San Francisco, but as there was no rooms vacant at the time he was told to re- turn in the afternoon, His luck was no better on his return, as more rooms had been engaged by telegraph than a hotel double the size of the one in question could contain, He was a little indig- nant, and told the clerk at the desk that he would stop there anyhow, and offered to back his boast with $100, Among the guests of the hotel wasa young lady from the same town as the gentleman, and for whom the would-be guest of the hotel had a liking, He went to the young lady, told his pre- dicament and determination, and asked the young lady to marry him, She consentéd, and together they went to the parson and were married. Itis sficient to say the gentleman made good his boast, Just as Young as He Used to Be, New York World: Furgurson, a wealthy dent of Albion, Orleans county, is the defendant in a breach of yromise suit. He is seventy years old, {)ul his love for the fair sex is as ardent as ever, for he proposed to and was ac- cepted by two dows inside of two mouths, The first was Mrs, Moses Ross, of Shelby, an attractive widow of sixty-three. She readily gave him her heart, and was preparing for the wedding, when her fickle suitor marvied Mrs, Wirt, a younger widow, of Eagle Hurbor, Mrs. Ross lblm'cs the value of her aflections at $30,000, ——e, CONNUBIALITIES, Hitch and kick—Marriage and divorce. The Deceased Wife's Sister bill was passed by the house of commons. This will save the British nobleman the bother of runnng away with her. Henpecked husbands might hear of some- thing o their advantage by consulting Mr. William J. Brown, of Michigau. Mr, Browan bas just married his twentieth wife. A McKeyn county, Penn,, woman, elghty- SUNDAY, APRIL three years old, Is said to have been married to her fourteenth husband the other day, after havirg been diyvorced thirteen times. Olean, Kan, is minus its mayor, T.C. Tewis, who has eloped with the daughter of a prominent merchant and gone to Boston, He left behind a wife and two small children. Wilson Winter, of Oshkosh, Wis., was mar- ried Tuesday to Miss Ella Spring. In this instance the usual order of thin, is re- versed—Spring lingers in the lap of Winter- A German who walked most of the way from Texas to Boon+ille, Ind., where he was to marty a young woman, was nearly six months in reaching his prospective bride. The couple are now wedded and have gone to Kan- sus. The Minneapolis Journal says two of the most prominent bankers of that city are mar- ried to half-blood Sioux, and that their de- scendants promise to be as proud of it as are the Virginians who trace back to Pocahon- tas. A Pacific coast missionary relates that after walking fifteen miles to_perform a mar- riage ceremony, he received in payment a sack of fine cabbages, and lugged them home on his back for fear of offending his parishioners, B Thomas Stanley, n gypsy, lies in the sreenbush, (N. Y.) lock up for having sold his wife to his cousin, in West Troy, re- cently, for §1. It is stated the wife cheer- fully acquiesced in the transaction, and that an agreement was signed by all the parties, Daniel Webster's great grandson is to marry a great granddaughter of Benjamin ¥ .anklin in June next, the ceremony to take place in Washington. . The youth is Webster Appleton Edgar, son of Mrs. Jerome Napol- eon Bonaparte by her first marriage, She \was Miss Appleton of Boston, a granddangh- ter of Webster. The girl is the grand- daughter of the late General Emery. Reently a young milliner of Paris, wishing to receive her lover in her room at the par- ental residence, tied sheets together by which to pull him up throngh her window. The lover seized the rope, but the girl, bein unable to retain her hold, was drawn out o the window aund fell from the third story of the house. The young Romeo broke her fall, but the pair sustained serious injuries. James McMorris and Kate Simpson eloped last week from the home of Katie's parecta, and were married at Jeffersonville, Ky. Mr. McMorris {8 o young merchant in W oming, und on a previous visit to Kentucky he be: came acquainted with Miss Georgin Simp- son. They corresponded until a few weeks ago, when McMorris arrived here and made the ncquaintance of her sister. Katie made it 80 agrecable for the young man that he fell deeply in love with her’ and when he proposed an elopement she consented. There comes a story from Clinton, Ta., to the effect that Franklin K. Peck, an aged citizen of that place, had prayed that his life might be prolonged until the fifticth anniver- sary of his marriage, which occurred on April 20, Though the end was thought to be near many times, the old man rallied, and when the day arrived he seemed overjoyed to know that the looked for time had come. He clasped his aged wife's hand. Soon after his strength failed and he passed away at 9:30 in the morning. He had lived in the vicinity of Clinton since 1837, A romantic_incident occurred in South Nashville a few duys ago. Two young swains, aged about sixteen, and the sons of prominent citizens, have long been suitors for the affections of a certain south side belle, also a daughter of prominent and well- to-do'parents. 13ad blood was engendered between the youthful lovers, who last weel concluded that the south end of the city wus to0 small to contain them both. A battle was agreed upon. The engagement was 1o have been fought under tne marquis of Queensbury rules. No one present, how- ever, was sufficiently posted on the details to render impartial judicial service, cipals in desparation discarded civilized methods and went at it in the good old way. After a prolonged and severe contest the fight was declareda draw. The names of the beligerents are known, but are not given, inasmuch as the color of their eyes render recognition easy within two blocks. The young lady is said to be in great distress. and also admiration, over the conduct of her adorers. B-IUS[CA“A e ———— AND DRAMATIC. Campanini after a_lapse of four “years, ap- peared in New York last week in **Otello.” Leslie Allen and his daughter Viola are to join the stock company of the Boston mu- seum next season. Rowland Buckstone, of *“The Highest Bid- der” company, is a son of Buckstone, the fa- mous English comedian. The Duff company will open with the new opera, *'The wucen’s Mate, at thc Broadway theater, New York, about May 1. Miss Clara Louise Kellogg-Strakosch is to head an opera company next season, and will give “Mignon” and “Faust,” with per- haps others. Bijou Heron returned to the stage last weel for the first time since the death of her father. She is playing in “The Mystery of a Hansom Cab." Hawthorne’s remarkable novel, the “Scar- let Letter,” has been dramatized, and Touis James has purchased the right' to produce it next season. “My Sweetheart,” Miss Minnic Palmer, sails for Europe May 20, on the Alaska, re- turning in December for a short starring tour of the large cities. Henry Irving and Ellen Terry are playing in “Faust” at the London Lyceum. In May the bill will be (hulu.n'd ofun he Amber Harp” and “Robert M: Miss Emily Winant, it is an. yunced, has been engaged by the Boston Haadel and Haydn society to sing in *“The Messiah” and “Elijah,” which are to be produced next season. Miss Menk Meyer, grand-niece of Anton Rubinstein, and pupil of Liszt, . .~ zal pro- digy not yet eighteen years ol s com- posed the music and written the Loretto of un opera. Mme. Gerster will sail for Europe on April 28, On May 15 she will sing in opera at the Pesth royal opera house, and will probably also appear during the scason in London in Italian opera. Mrs. McKee Rankin’s season with “‘Ihe Golden Giant”’ was finished according to the prearranged dates. It is denied that the sea- son was not satisfactory, The piece will be used again in the fall. 1t is chronicled that Ella Russel, ‘“the new American prima dona has given her one hun- dredth concert at Warsaw, and the enthusi- astic Russians threw her valuable presents and more than three hundred bouquets, “Otello,” Verdi's latest opera, which was recently produced in New York, has elicited strong praise from a number of tne critics on the ground of its intrinsic merit, as well as for the manner in which it was presented. Mr. Bolossy Kiralfy has just purchased the original Parisian spectacle, ““Matthias San- dorf,” by rdulius Verne and W. Busnash, which will be produced at Niblo's garden in August. The Victoria theater, of Berlin,pro- Quces it next month, Etelka Gerster wants the public to refrain from unkind remarks and see it she doesu’t her voice after a while, *Pens can very cruel,” she says. No one fecls ill-disposed foward’ her, but o woman who ean’t sing ought not be advertised to sing. Mrs. Langtry is to pass the summer on the Pacific coast, and has not any contracts to ar next season as yet. This has given ney to the old, old story that she pro- poses to obtain a divorce from her husband under the accommodating laws of California, Agnes Huntiogton will retire from the Bostonlans opera company at the close of the present season with entire good will on the hart of both singer and management, Jesse Jartlett Davis has been engaged to sing leading contrulto roles for the Hostoniaus next season. Herrmann, the prestidigitateur, will sail for Loudon on May 23, where he has an e gagement st the Crystal palace in view. | will return to this couutry in July. and open in Omaha on August 6. From there hie goes direct to San ¥ cisco, and from there to the Civy of Mexico, where he will begin an engagement in October nex A permanent Italian operais to be estab- lished at the Paris Jiden theater for the pe; formance of operas exclusively by Italian and French composers. Verdi's “Otello,” Boito's “Mefistofele,” and Ponchielii's “Gioconda” will te the Italiar works to be first placed upon the repertoire. Chevalier Blondin starts for New York from France in about two weeks and will ap- pear at St. George, Staten Island, in J under the man of Tmre Kiraily. Al though the famous tight-rope walker ~is SIxLY four yeu he is sald to beas lively us reappearance in this count ice Of 50, many years will b resting avent “Nudjy,” the opersita which'is to follow 29. 1888.—-SIXTEEN PAGES, PROTECTIONTA R LOGIE Against Shoddy Goods. Agalinst Unpr1nc1p1ed Dealers. Against High Prices. Against Second Hand Trash. OMAHA FURNITURE COMPANY Protect you against all of these abuses. Chamber Suits are manufactured for US l“\l LUSI\’LLY out of the best selections of solid v and mahogany, 60 styles, ranging in price from $18 up, y them, We handle nothing but FIRST-CLASS goods. Our alnut, oak, ash We make all of our own PARLOR SUITS and ODD PIECES, and WARRANT every article First Class, Parlor Chairs, Imported Plush, $4.50. Parlor Rockers, Imp'd. Plush, $9.50, Parlor Suites, Imp'd. Plush, $35. ‘We will have your trade if Honest Goods, Low Prices,Easy Payments and Gentlemanly Dealings count tor anything. Western agents for The Whitney Jewel MODEL Baby Carriage, efrigerator, Illinois Cooking Stove, GASOLINE STOVE AND LOWELL CARPETINGS. A hese are acknowledged the best throughout the United States. he city. The only first class Installment IHouse Zie . OMAHA FURNITURE CO,, 1212 Farnam Street, Omaha. 1310 and 1312 Farnam St. Always Inatqek a Zull line of RIKER'S TOILET REQUISITES, PERFUMES, &c. All of which are legally guarantecd tq give entire satisfaction or they cost yom nothing. NO mmm}u NO POTASIH, NO ARSENIC IN Riker's Compound Sarsaparille The best medicine in the world to purify the blood and invigorate the system. Bottles contain nearly double the quantity of any other advertised. Price, 75 Cents. RIKER'S EXPRCTORANT. One boltle WARRANFED Lo cure any un!lnnry( or Cold or yor ¥ money ls roturned. A w TAIN CUIt or Coughs, Colds, ‘Wh Thine in Ciost, rlmmuy. Bronchitis, matory Disenses of the Pulmonary Or, Price, 60 Cents. Riker's Calisayaand Iron TONIC AND ANTI-MALARIAL, One of the Oldest and Best Medieines known ta medical sclence. Prevents and Cures Malaria or any disenses of that nature. Improves the appetite, Kns riclies the blood, Relnvigorates tho sestom, abd 18 permanent in its of PINT BOTE Price, 75 Cents, Riker’s True Emulsion. Of I'inest Tasteless Norwegian COD LIVER OIL, With Hypophosphites of Lime and Soda. NO POTASH, NOSOAP. NOMOSS. EASILY TAKEN. EADILY DI D. This Emulsion contains @ per cent of PURE O and may be jmplicitly dep upon in every in: stance to give entire satisfuction, and s guaranteed tole the best emlsion now mide, or we return the Price, Per Bottle, 75 Cents. “Erminie at the Casino, New York city, is in three scenes each of which affords oppor- tunity for beautiful artistic effects. The first represents the exterior.of the governor- general’s palace on the baniks of the Danube, the second the grand solon of the palace, dis- closing in the distance a view of Vienna by night, and the third a street ahd bridge in Pesthl. The first two scenes are by Henry E. Hoyt and the last by Richard Marston, v Musical Festival will and 26 in the great Music hall. Cincinnati, under the direction of Theodore Thomas. The solo artists comprise Frao Lilli Lehman, Mme, Ginlia Valda, Herr Paul Kalisch, Myron W. Whitney, Mrs. Co- rinne Moore-Lawson, Miss Emma Cranch, T. Toedt, Miss Elizabeth Hetlich, A. E. Stod- dard, and Bdward Lloyd, thé Enzlish tenor, who comes under contract to sing sole this festival. Arthur Mces will be th ganist. The other musical forces are Thoo- dore Thomas's orchestra, augmented to 108, and the Cincinnuti May Festival chorus of 600 voices. be given M e sl PEPPERMINT DROPS. A girl may lsugh and a girl may sing, And a girl may dance all day} But she can’t mount a bicyele like a man, 1or her garments ain’t made that way. An Arcola young lady of taste, Loved a dude who wore bangs made of paste; She told him his_muscle a3 her bustle 1t he'd practice at squeezing her waist. Harlem has a basc ball club called “The Girls.” It is doubtless referredto as the Mr. Hamlet remarked, the rub,” he is supposed to h got off a railroad train with a cinder optic. The * Herr Professor—“‘Donncrwetter, whiat is it that that outragcous rumbling in the street makes rdon—it is a beer wagon.” The Keely motor is developing some fric- tion in tne courts, This is the first sign of any motion in connection with the machine, A German baron is said to_have securcd a place as waiter in a New York restaurant, It is only natural that he should take to the fod- der-land. “Knock-around--and-do-nothing-all-day” was the name a Kentucky father gave his son, which the last legisluture [consented ty change for him. A doctor at Virginia, Nev., who was ar- rested for not reporting cases of smallpox, wvas horsewhipped the next day by a woman for reporting one. “[eep your eye on Kansas City's building boom,” says the Kansas City Times. All right, But is every speculator obliged to buy 118 0wn microscope? According to the ladies’ fashion journals, this is to be & velvet year, But from the olitical news we judge it will ba more widely Khown as u canvass year. “Discrepancies in my account!” repeated the bank cashier indignantly, *not a bit of it. The accounts are all right” toa cent, The trouble is with the cash.” A prize fighter can get along all right with abroken arm or leg, but if his jaw should happen to be fractured or his tongue cut off what in the world would become of him? A Boston scientist says the delightful tingle of a kiss is caused by the electricity in it. That is probably the reason it is so much more fun to kiss o dynamo than u pretty girl. “Did you have any confederates?” inquired the judge. *No, judge,” said the prisoner, who had pleaded guilty of bank robbery, “ithe fellers that helped me was democrats, o' course, but they wasn,t Rebs.” "The following order has just been received at a lurge wholesale drug establishment: “Dear Sirs—The baseball wave has struck this town. Pleaso send mo ten gross of Pond's Extract and five boxes of plasters.” “Pho life of a young man in_Reading, P: has been seriously cdangerefl by lead-poi oning, contracted by kissing a girl's rough painted cheeks. Had he kissed her lips he might have lost his life in an explosion of natural “Do you think, young many” o said, *‘that you will be able 10 take care of my daughter Flora in the style to which_she has been ac- customed £ “f think so, sir,” answered the young man confidently. '“She refuscd o go 10 the concert with me last Week, because, she said, she had ‘nothing to wear,’” “You say he committed suicide on the in- stallment plan? How’s thald?, *‘He moved from Chicago to New Yorls ian to Cincin- nati, then to is, where . K to drinking beer, then whisky, e B eating house for his meals,and finally became a cigaret sinoker, What else could you call it “Eye, just in" his —————— Nipped in the Bud, Is it not better to nip Consumption, the greatest scourge of humanity, in the bud, than to try to »145 its pr A few doses s }.uulm\mu, A AmL, the king of Consump- tion, will relieve, and a thorough treat- ment will cure, Nasal Catarrh, too of- ten the forerunner of consumption, can be cured by CALIFORNIA CAT-R- CURE. These remedies are sold and fully warranted by Goodman Drug Co., at 1, or three for $2.50. - Faro, nw tall of the Mux Meyer & Seidenberg’s town, a 10¢ cigar for 8¢, Co., wholesale depat WASH DRESS GOODS AT Popular Prices Our stock of Wash Dress Goods was never more complete than itis this season, and at prices much below our competitors. Note the follow- ing prices and theninvestigate and ascertain whether we do as we advertise or not: American Sateens at 10e¢, 12}¢, 15¢ and 25¢. The 2 sold in this city for imported goods. o quality is Best French Sateens at 83 1-8¢ per yard; sold everywhere in Omaha at 85¢. American Dress Ginghams, at 10c, 124c and 17 Best Imported Zephyr Ginghams, large assortment to select from, at 25¢. Figured India Mulls, very handsome and we guarantee them not to fade, 17¢ and 25¢ a yard. Best Batiste, one yard wide and guaranteed to wash at 124c. Crinkled Seersuckers at 10c and 124c. American Outing Flannels at 15¢ a yard. Imported Outing Flannels, at 50c a yard. India Linen at 10e, 124c, 15¢, 17¢, 20¢, 25¢, 80c, 35¢ and 40c. Plaid and Striped White Goods at e, Te, 9¢, 10c, 124e, 14c, 15¢, 16¢. 17¢, 20¢, 22¢, 25¢ and 80c. In the last named goods Wwe have o large assortment of styles at each price. Selling goods for cash enables us to give the lowest prices that can be made and we believe that we can convince you that we sell goods cheap if you will visit our store, at least you will receive courteous treatment whether you buy | or not. THOMPSON,BELOENGCD 1319 Fanam-st., Omaha. A Presidential Bee Hi A gentleman who went to Washing- ton recently in order to get some se tors to attend the banquet of a political club, met a senatorial friend at the door of the senate chamber andasked his aid in persuading some of his brother sen- ators to attend, “Who do you w aut?” was asked. HSenator A,” was the reply. “He won't go because he is a candi- | date for the presiden: “Well, then, Senator BY”? “‘He's a candidate, Luu.‘f’ 'BARNACLE &JONES, |1 PI.UMBEHS, Attention Paid to Fine Plumbing. o most approved sanitary appliances always on haud. Drainlaying & speciaity. All work done according to the strict rules 0f sanitation. Estimates Furnished, For Plumbing, Steam and Gas Fiting and Gas Fixtures. Special ““How about *‘He's another,” “Senator D. the ¥ ame boat.” nator Ky *Another.” “Can't. I get any | Presidential candidate **Not in that room the senator, pointilg over Shis shoalder ut the seuste.chamber.” Hose and Lawn Goods Always who isncta on Hand, Telephone 1081, s the rerly of | 404 Novth 16th Street | With PEPSIN and QUININE, at the same price. RIKER'S BEEF, IRON AND WINE. Best Nutritive Tonte. Pints, ) cents. Riker's Perftmed Al ondMeal. An clogant and effectunl propnration for whitening sotten d benutifying the skin. For removin AHONA, OF hiny IBIBUIIoR 1€ Will b6 10 tho numerous, lotions, kaap It is absolu ways len al. WDn & Inre clogunt metl caskot, with. Binge. Covers Price, 20 cents. Riker’s Florida Water. bronounced by all o b more fragrnt ind lusting an any. 1alf pints, 8 cents, Guaranteed to be the Deet 11 Sxistence, Riker's Tonic Wine of Coca, Guaranteed superior to the fmported, and very far superior o any other of domestic munufacture. bottles contain oue and a quarter piats. Vrice, 7 cents, RIKER'S AMERICAN FACE POWDER, Absolutely harmless, reuily beneficial; everybody usesit. Large boxes, Riker's Compound Dandelion Pills Are the best Liver Pills you can take. No mercurys Noaloes. Nojalup. Box (30 pills) Ib cents, i Riker's TOILET PREPARATIONS Inelyding the following: Rikers Riker's Amerl Tair llu-lnx Rikers” American, trifrice c Lustral Hair Dress. tiker's um and '| U Dowder. RIKER'S CELEBRATED Ex, Strong Hankerchief Extracts Legnlly guaranteed to be superior in every way to bin’s, AtKinson’s, Coudra Orin fact any, lmported or domestie, Riker's American Sachet Powders Are legally warranted to hold thelr odor for ive years, A. R. LOGIE, 1310 and 1312 Farnam Street, THE_ COMMERCIAL HOTEL, Cor. Dearborn and Lake Streets, CHICAGO. This house s Just been thoroughly refited ata cost of over § making it far 'P than any hotel of t e R o I evtay. Hoctrio Libhts, Bt Hooms, knd. aik modern improvements, Rates, .00 and $2,50 per Day, Including meals. Centrally located; accessibla toall rallway stations, theaters and business houses. Street cars to all points of the chiy. Speciul rates to professional people, C. W. DABB & CO,, Proprictors, HERE ARE BARGAINS. '0M Place lots §1,750 to §,70, lot in Hanscom Place, G0x1E room house, city water and’ cistern; burn and shed, 5,000 Hx150, new 8 room house, 3, lsundry room, lurge elosets, Eouth front, 1174, $1,390 0 on it near N. St South Oumubiu, 1,00 4 1O o0 N. Bt Bouth Owaha, $1540. 4 JO08 ou L and 2iat St Bouth Onatia, §40, We can give you the best Prices and Terms Eouth Omalia Property, BOSWORTH & JOPLIN, Room 89, Barker Block, | Rl Etate, Loans, Fire lisurance,