Norwich Bulletin Newspaper, January 25, 1913, Page 16

RAINS, FAIR TOMORROW . A - FULL AssoOCI ATED PRESS DIISPATCHES What Is Going On Tonight. " Moving Plotures‘and lllustrated Songs at the Breed Theater. Vaudeville und Moving Pictures at See the shoe specials Frank A. Bill offers today (Saturday). Ladies’ $2.50 shoes at $2, ladies’ fine $3.30 and 34 shoes at $3, men's $2.50 shoes at $2, ete. The fourth number of the Y. M. C. A. entertainment course to be given at the Central Baptist church next Tues- day eveming will be a musical attrac- tion of unusual interest. The combi- nation 1s known as the Boston im- periais and includes eight talented art- ists. Miss Evangeline Hiltz the prima donna soprano, is unquestionably the finest colorature soprano in New Bag- land. She has been soloist with lead- ing concert companies for sevel vears and for three years soloist with Victor’s band. Raymond Stmonds, first tenor: Lyman Hemenway, second tenor; John Smaliman, baritone, and Alex Logan basso, comprise one of the best male quartettes in Boston. The instrumental trio Is composed of FI\HED Morse, formeriy solofst with Sousa’s orchestra: Miss Alberia Florence, vio- linist, formerly with the Bostoniaz la- dies’ orchestra, and Miss Phyllis Ham- mond, harpist. Miss Hammond has for two seasons toured with her own com- pany and as soloist has gppeared be- fore mearly all the exctofive clubs of eastern Massachusetis, The programme will consist of voc: solos, duets, quartet: and quintettes; instrumental trios, harp solos, and string and vocal ensembl Tickets are on sale at the Y, M. C. A, and G. A. Davis® store at 30 cents each. Doors will open at 7.30 and programme begins promptly at € THE BASS CLEF. LOUISE EARNOLT, CONTRALTO, for services + s i. the a Miss Barnolt's first appearance in} Norwich I8 being looked forward to with a great deaj of pleasure. Fler connection with the Montreal Opera | company Jeaves mo question as to he dramatic talent. Her best roles are Millaka in Lakure, Begyis o i/ Amyies Fritz Suzuki in Madams Buitersy, io- la in Cavalleria Rusticannu, \iek H in Tales of Hoffman, Saec is deyoting | all of her spare time 1o repcrioirel building and has a greaf future ahead | of her. Miss Barstow, the violinist, is meet ng with wobderful success, just appeared at Symphony the 19th with Biena Gerhards, booked for a eomcert in April with the | Boston Sympheny ocrhestra, ] Tickets 16 associate members are on | sale this merning, The associate mem- | bers of the ciub subseribe for iwo tick- | ets for each concert at 75 cemis cach, | and select their seats before the pubiic | sale begins, The sassocinie member- | ship roll is still open. and these wish- | i | | ing to sign cards may de o any time before Wednesday, the 29th. Tickets Will not be on sele to other than asso- ciate members unii Wednesday, the 29th. The price for single concert tick- ets will be $1 BREED THEATER. The Wives of Jamestown, Sensational Two-Reel Feature Pictur. Ome of the most aseurate portrayais of historical events is the superh Ka- lem story at the Broed today entitied The Wives of Jamestown. This is iw two Teels of ome thousand feet cach and was mmde partially in Fmgiznd and partdy in Jamestown, Va. it is the | Temarkabie siory of the transporiing of | women from Engiand to Jamestown to be sold as wives to the codonists and how Iady Geraldine was sold to the | man who had defended her at the ar- rival of the vessel bringing her. He proved to be her lover, to whom she had given her heart while in Enzland but, not recognizing him, had prepared 10 commit suicide, when he removed the beard and stood as he did at their old home and plaved the flute for her ontertainment. Scenically the picture is a beauty of the first order, the scenes | at the colony sale being as beautiful and remarkable as any this year. Ire- land the Oppressed Is the title of the other Irish pictur: FEATURE SHOW—DAVIS THEATER An opportunity which no Norwich theatergoer can afford to miss is that afforded them by the management of | the Davis theater to see that celebrated | dramatic actress, Blanche Walsh, in a picture version of her famous success, The Resurrection, by the late Count Leo Tolstoy. Miss Walsh is one of the foremost actresses of the American stage, and the motion picture manu- facturers, and also motion picture pa- irons, are exceedingly fortunate to have the opportunity of securing her poses from this great play, something she was prevalled upon to do by prominent | managerg and critics who urged her to perpetuate her wonderful acting in thi= great play. Miss Walsh starred in The Resurrection for something Jike five years, everywhere to tremendous crowds, and no piay for 20 ycars has made such a tremendous impression, The story tells of the downfall of o gretty Russian peasant girl, Katusha Maslova, Watusha's beauiy attracts the admiration of & young nobieman of the czar's housshold and this admira- tion creates so much jealousy that she is driven from the household where she is employed, Fyerywhers she goes to work men of the househsld pu: her so mmch attention fhat she is driv. en away by the mistress, Dovn, down she goes, nntll, starving snd desperste, she Is foreed to 3 life of gevety and yhame, Ons night, when fiushed with wine, gihs gives ons of ey yictimg on yverdose of sleoping pswder and he Ales. Katushs is sentenced (o banisk ™ day morning ar Dennis. orning s . en t Comforter§C. good Rise of Popular Legal C Making sembling n brown comp the right rai Fisiselima i Gomps raised oh Fleises Would Like 1o & cate jhe people is “Wat More Bread sbme very ssund should il that b Erease mur heailh foim, DR. F. W. HOL¥S, Deniist| even more impressive and wondertul | COLDS AFFECT THE KIDNEYS vis theater for the first hait of the | Many Nerwich People Have Found This To Be True in picture form than in the sboken drama, and Miss Walsh' appeaviog in the title role of the pictdre version, ives it additional interest, so that the week ‘will doubtless Le packed to ihe doors at every performance. DAV:. THEATER. All the regular patrons of the Da who make Thursday night their dat; for the vaudeville at that popular | o om 5 house, and who missed their chance because Thé Ot Homestead was here, will have one moro chance tonight and this afternoon to sce the cxcellunt bil: that is on for tie lust of the weeik. The three turns are all ones you wi fo see and will miss LaKeliiors 1 bhave an offering t you and to that is aGded the fun and melo- dy which the Three Whelans Iuter- | sper in their nov i gz and D act. Then to th ; simmons and C nation of sense an just calculate: Davis pietu: themselves. reception on ik e H 1 ances toni o is_the fam which is one of ducers ever . 5 ture screen, st a and see this s : 4 ture toni SUND uB Seventh Day ent! H-mee Loyai Temn L The sut C n meeting in Truth. The Hol 3 until fur At the Fir o at ¢ Rev. G. H The G Peabody. it Not Wh. You CAMGREQ FARGUS Stirring Story of Yeast SPELLS HIS NAME “DOUGH” Reputation as increased Bre ocate Jobn Doush He wes forthwith emp Fus yulus of bread as a foc i doing )L R S0 wo da iy John 1 un a% Anmex, Room A | stannes Buil Aelcghons 43 ocziva | let Are you wretchied in bad weather? Does every cold settle on your kid- neys? 5 ache and become irregular and cause to sus- weakness. WANTED. under the heading of “WANTED, FOR SALE or TO REN ~ ARE INSERTED AT THE RATE OF 5c per line, six words to the line FOR SALE. TO RENT. need quick help. ills are especially . 7, Norwicl, in'in my back, BLosion ¥ Augusia Journal, Mrldgeport Post, lame and Was sure to s Kidney Pills 11 do.not hava TEN DOLLAR NOTE FOR A FLYER Will carry a 2o word classified Ad. igto 2 million Lomes one time (any day) in entire lst: List A—New England. 25 words. 1 insertion § s insertions 327. Portana Telegram. sutland Heraid, oW Diitain teraid New Haven Leadel, st Huvernill Gazette. Lgor No vs, yiarciord Giobe, iden Record. ~ \y'cester Telegram Lewiston Journal Norwich Bulletin, Walterville Bentinel Lowell Telegram, Springfield Boston Am Jnion, Lawrence Eagle. ican, Lynn News, siiua Tolegraph, Wrovidence Journal lington res Pross, Bend for Booxiet, Merrill _ Adv. Agoncy. 1161 Brosaway, N. Y. Phont 7 Mad. Jan13s icome, We ne free samp. ents for the United ©— Doan’s — and TWANTE covered AGENTS—You can secure permanent ployment and earn a good sSteady i good men. Send for and _catalogue. Morris sles Co, clair, N, J. jan25d WANTED—$40 per month and ex- pensos puid good men for taking, or- s, Steady work. Apply Pretediive irseries, Genev Y, junzad ing housenoid article; large demand goods; success assured; investigite lay ew F nd Specialty Co., 120 : jan?sd 7, Hartford ANTED —Zalesmen to sell new edu- fonal -ciulty to school boards; w¥: no competition; on. Union Sciivol Fur- St eral p WANTED—izh class . shrabs, roses,vines, ber: man to seil ¥ bushes, Tning 1 send for ous latest lars free, Specially . Middle{own, Conn. in our tw kages of pipe cleaners for i0c tin of Mariposa 10- kel, at Fagan's Noodle ce tnat wiil Slop a train of cars at 2 point on_the road. John J. €y, Monhegun. R.D. No. > —Board and room In rotestant famlly by three have good re Bulletin. =’ '{ONS are easy bookiet Y-638 tells “ile today—mnow. - Barl Hop- Washiugton, D. C. 3An1 W8 N REAL ESTATE business by The small cost of our course is olute guarantee of sai- Wwill help you get start- >r free particulars. Na- erative Iiealty Company, n Building, Washington, D. 3ands ction woon strictly temperate. Locust Valiey, jan23d Two or three families of 5, ole, eady - work Apply to Quidnick- . Willimantic, Conn. onced man on dairy and board for & SD—Agenis; every town; best 00d wag: permanent] orritery Brothers® | jan2sd in_an automatio | Ad- | Great possibilitics even as side WANTED —Farm work by a young iglishman; can milk and care for plain and also for about necessary. Write >—To buy beef, hog: five to ten head each week, given, P, Nawrockl, 495 jan22d PTIONAL OFPORTUNIT Sor one of the best busi- 05 known; permapent; irol; absolulely mo risk) 165, Niw Haven, Conn, janz2d WANFED—AR old house or building near the center of city, Price must be low for cash. Address Mr, Hadoljff, e Bailetin C janzid WANTED—Men and wemen wanted oveininent parcels pesi pesitions Tionin; rapid advancemeny; aunual ions . no “layeis;’ mon ifieient; aver 18- sintments comingi Ipfluence 1 sraédiately for 1 . Pranklin Instituie, ester, N. ¥, ©D—Raw furs, at M A, Heed- TR R Lt Rovsd DAl kinds of raw furs, 1 el at Joseph ©enner Sns’ Saturdaj. A. B. Weodwerth. om0 for &y and ubility io operate | capiul necessary, Drawer WANGED —Plano (URinE. & o1~ 298 Preospect St, Clty. Tol 6¥3-2. b L. J. COSCORAN, Sup clock a. m., Winslow W | avenue, the following property: One black horso (weighs between 1300 and 500). 1 colt (coming three vear: ATrow, ne: cuterer w Help Wanted s, Farm Help, 1 Housework Gi ‘ooks, and several Malds for hospital FREE EMPLOYMENT BUREAU, Central Bldg. WANTED Good Family Cook, Second Girls, seneral House Work Weman in din- ng room, Scrub and Kitchen Women. J. B. LUCAS, Room 32 Central Building B., WILCOX .... .. Auctioneer. AUCTION? WEDNESDAY, JAN. 29, 1913, at 1i o’clock a. m., will sell at public auction, at the liams farm, on Vergason 1t 1200). 1 one-horse mow . 1 horse rake, 1 cutaway itivators, 1 plow, 1 weeder, nter, 6 cider barrels, 1 set m harness, 1 express har- 2 driving narness, 1 Concord bug- Qemocrat wagon 2 market wag- tean wagon, 1 new covered millc os, 1 grindstons, » 25-foot ladder, 1 Keg 5 bushels Gold Coin sced-po- (utoes, 1 fish box, 1 churn, ¢ C, cream eans, some housshold furniture, and other farming mention, 1f s + rair weekday, Terms cash, A tools tes numerous to id day prove stormy, be ip gitendanes, JOSEPH BEETHAM, sitistanding the Fire we are still doing business at the eild stand and the qualilty of pur work is just *"Nothing but skilied labor empiored e same as ever— Fhe Best.” 1 bést materials used in pur work. STETSON & YOUNG, Carpenters and Builders, Telephone, West Main St is mo advertising medi Bastern Connecticut egual o The Bul Dusiness resuits, NEWMARKET HOTEL, 716 Boswwil Ave. First-class Wines, Liquors and Cigars. Meals and Welch Rarebit served to order. Johm Ruckie. Prop. Tel, i8:=h FOR SALE—One meat refrigerator 16 feet 6 inches high by 6 feet 9 inches wide, 1 corned beef tank well, z one- barrél earthern crocks, 1 Enterprise dried beef cutter, 1 set computing scales (make, Dayton, O). For price call on or address S. M. Biiven, 68 Un- ion St, Willimantic, Conn, jan25d FOR SALE — Thoroughbred collie puppies. O. B. Peck. Tel. 463-14. Janzsd FOR SALE_Two Poterson's desk companions, $2.50 each. K. N. Cash, 9 Lnion 3t., Norwich, Conn. Jan25d FOR SALE—100 bushols russet ap- ples. Apply W. E. Burgess, Lebanon. Tel. 17-4, Jan24d FOR SALE Cleap, one high clas parior suit, 3 1ron beds, 1 buffet, leav . Mmust be sold this week. A Wnittaker, Griswold, Ct, Junzia FOR SALE—Two young new Il ws, 1000 1bs, horse, ‘afraid of nothing, o White Wyandotte and Rhode 1s. und Red pullets and cockerels, W, \anr, Frankiin, Ct. Tel. Leb. Div. 33-4. "G SALIL—Model 17 Bulck, 1910, (August), fully equipped with every- thing; Jope-Hartiord, model D, (9, go0a order, full~ equipped; Maxwell, i1, model Q, roadster, rully equipped; Maxwell, model , racing rowdster; Jackson' 2 cyl, light truck; two Max als, "1%, 36 h, p. practically new, These cars must be Soid te make room for 1813 models, Price no objoct. Send in your bids. C, H, Pellott, Dun- Jonn. Ph igo, Jan23d ¥OR SAL¥_11-room cottage, modern improvements, $8,000; lot adjoining, T0X120, §500; &lso bakers' outfit, eleetric mixer, barrel capacily, will sell very cneap—a bargain, A, L. Olmsted, 1 Highiand Ave., an3d FOR SALI— 35.25 per_cord in iwo-cora lets, Cash on delivery, Adaress Charles S. Brown. Yuntic, Conn, Telep Jan23d FOR SALE—One first ticket to Canada; price 3%, Address William Lennox, No, 2 3. K. le,_ Cenn. o TEN ST POCKER Shorthand iessons equip you to earn $300 up. Graduates in Constant de- mand. P lesson free. Expert, 1463 arcade, Provi o. B. L sanzod will se that will surprise you my at a price Large SLUCK of millinery aad fixtures, situated on | { Main st., 0. Jewett City. | Miss D. Beauregard. Jsnlid FOR SALE OR RLNT Farm of Pai- rick Shea, in_town of Canterbury, iwo iniies north of Canierbury, on Brovkiyn road. comprising about 110 gores. in- Guivs S EUSHE. Agan MW Lonaon, Coan. _ Junid FOR BALL SLb wood, Stove JeLaih $450 cotd, 32.50 hajt cofd. G A Bull 3 o - of 10 room good barn suitable for garags, gvod Feason lor seilius. Inquize ai 138 Me- lviniey Avenue decid THINE IT OVER — 350 noteLeads and 20U 6% (regular business size) cavelopes, neatiy printed, Lor $1.30; 504 each, $3.00. Beua for sampiés and prices fOf any Driuling you are in need Of. The Bulletn Company, Norwici, Conn. ¥OR SALE—O. L C. pigs, thorough- breds, registered, none Dbetter in Lhe country. Ludiow Farm, Norti Stoping- ton. R. ¥. D. 5, Norwich, Conn. H. ¥. EButton. FRINTING—LooK at Lhess prices: 500 | G% envelopes (regulur business size), cdrd printed in corner, $1.40; 1000, $2.00; 5,000, $0.00; 10,000, 10.00. 500 Loloheads, 6x34%, Drinfed, 3140; 1,000 $2.10; 5,000, $6.50; 16,000, “$12.50, ' 500 leiterhends, $iuxil, printed, $1.16 , $9.50; 16,000, '$13.50. ads, Tx8s. printed, 3160 5 5,000, $1.00; 10,000, $§13.50. Printing of every _ description done prompily. Send for samples. The Bui- letin Co., Printers and Binders, Nor- wieh, Conn, SACRIFICE SALE Pleasanily located | 78 acre farm, 36 acres excelient plow iand, balance’ pusture and wood, good fruif, 14 miles from R. R. station and viliage, Mear merkets, 14 room colonial Bouse with verandab, best condition outside and in, large barn, palnted, new | peshouse, cot 3363, sheds, outbuildings, | buildings worth $5.000; price $3,300— ,000 down, Includes’ houschold fur- ( 31 pibnings, fdrming tools ‘and poulicy. ryon's Agency, Willimantic, Conn. Jan3t FOR SALE, A bargain for a live meehanie with a littie re outiit for wagon and auipmebile wor Woodworking, blacksmithing and paint. | {ng all under ons roof, Best location | in"the city, Owner wWishes to retire cifve’ business, Address PALVMER & ROGERS, d Norwich, Conn, frem jam TO RENT—Two furnisfféd connect- ing rooms; witl rent separate or to- socher, Mrs. Kobert Mcamiernan, 120 roadway. Janod TO RENT_At No. 6 West Town SL, nedr Harland's Corner, a nice tenement of eight rooms, closetf, city water and electric wired; also barn if desired. ¥or further pi T. B. Lillibridge, Town. Phone S$71-2. Jjan3d stigulars inquire —of , _Scotland Road, Norwic s| POETRY REST. The hills call, the dew-clad morning 1uis, 5\ Aboys thodustys. .= "of the Pl Could 1 Jay aside my yoke of old-tim weariness; Could I take my. staff and seek the hills again; The far hills where dawn is sweet with rain? After much_thirst, much hungering, at " nightfall, When' the vong way beyond my striv- ing seems, Would inere come suddenly the keen sweet breath of valleys, And, afar off, the sound -of twilight streams, In quiet hills whose dusk is cool with dreams? The murmuring of rivers; and the wind ; A starlit place of shadows liquid, dee| Ah, and a night of infinite forgetting! Night of the calm great hills that vigil kKeep; The mothér hills where weary men find sleep. TO RENT —Upstairs tenement of 7 rooms, gas, bath, hot and coid water, steam heat furnished. Inquire R. W. Tilden, 74 Pearl St. decsld TO RENT_Lower tenement, four rooms. Bnquire J. Bradford, Book- binder, 108 Broadway. dec20d TO RBNT—The store No. 35 Broad- wav. next to the Wauregan Hotel, and formerly occupied by W. J Townsend as a_grocery store. Apply to Wiliam H. Shields. apriza FURNISHED ROOMS — Central loca- tion. * Mrs. Smms Morss, 18 Union St nov! " FURNISHED ROOMS, all modern con- veniences, 38 Unicn St. Telephoas $34-4, i¥i7a UP 1O DATE furnished rooms, Mar- guerite bullding. Mrs. Lees. $76 Main. 0ct263 FOR SALE™ with | temohts, b xs vinted, $1.40; 3,000, "31-63; 5,480, $4,00% 16,006, $11.00. | dy cash te get a first class | SACRIFICE SALE OF AUTOMOBILES Now is the time to purchase a used car, We need the room for our new product; Don’t miss this opportunity. An attractive offer- ing of Pope-Hartfor nd other makes at sacrifico prices, rang- ing from $200. upwards. Come and look them over, or address Used Car Department THE POPE MWANUFACTURING COMPANY, Hlartford, Conn. FOR SALE 48 Union & a Cottage House of six rooms. cet, Owner has moved from city. A good chance to secure a home near the center of the city. In- quire of JAMES L. CASE, hetucket St., Norwich, Ct. New York Correspondent FOR SALE A High Grade Preferred Stoek, paying 7 per cent. of an old and established company; total issue $2,000,000. The stock will be of- fered to investors this week at 89 and dividend. by Spencer Trask York Banke JAMES L. CASE, 40 Shetucket St.. Norwich, Conn. FOR SALE Farm containing 95 acres land, 40 tillable, balance pasture and wood- land, orehard of 152 apple trees. The house has 11 roems u. falr condi- tion, running water in house and sufficient water on farm. There ls also a good barn, wagon shed, hen houses, ice houses. This farm is lo- cated in Preston City, near the ehurehes and schoel, and the price is $2,000 TRA €IS D.DONOHUE, " FOR SALE Two 2-tenement houses on Mechanic Street in Danielson. Income $420 gross, net income on investment 93 per cent. Houses pleasantly situated, three minutes’ walk from railroad sta- tion, post office and business section, five minutes from churches and schools. E. L. DARBIE, Real Estate Agent, Savings Bank Block, Danielson, Conn. | FOR SALE To close the Estate of James Brown, late of North Stonington. 1. A dwelling house, with smail tract of land, located one and one- quarter miles from North Stonington village, just off state road, and for- merly known as the Taugwank Cream- ery poperty. .~ Farm of one hundred acres, more or less, with dwelling house and out- buildings, located in North Stonington, formerly ‘known as the Hull farm. 3, - Farm of three hundred acres, more or less.with large apple orchards, good mowing land and pasturage, in the town of North Stonington, known as_the Colburn place, . Further information cone above real estate gun be obtalned from LLYN I, BROWN, care of Brown & erkins, Norwich, Conn. Jan23d FOR SALE Six-reom Cottage, barn, hennery, fruit, 21-4 aeres of land, Clese to trelley and very tempting, E. A. PRENTICE Phene 360, 86 Cliff Street FOR SALE Several hundred feet of Radiators. some of which are new; aiso two Boil- ers, ail perfect and used only one sea- som. The price will move them. T. E. BURNS, ~ 82 Franklin Strect. janiod THERE 1s no advertising medium in Eastern Connecticut equal to The Bul- letin for busiaess results. rning the Seashore Land For Sais Forty acres of hign lanc tuate on state mecadam rosd overisoking the Atlantic ocean fruom Point Judilh on the east to Montauk on the west. Only 25 minntes’ ride from Westerly station, N Y. N H. &£ 5 R R FRANK coy. Long_Distance Telezhone. 6 High Street, Westerly, R L decil! Peck’s Heal Estat: Agency * FARHMS A SPECIALTY 132 Sprinz 3 5. Comn HORSES—HORSES 28 just arrived. Big bnes (1600 1bs.) matched pairs, horses for delivery wagons. Everything, anything, come, see and be convinced. ELMER R. PIERSON Telephone 1139 BOXBALL ALLEYS. Tso Boxball Bowline Alleys for sale Inquire of J. C. GARAND, Jewett City P, O, 1267, Jan21TuThs FOR SALE Seven per gent, eumulative preferred shares f reliabls indusirial company par vaiue §ind, price $1023%, netting investor approfimately 6.83 Der eent., dividends payable quarterly, Thls is- sue, by redson of its satisthctory mar- ket price its assured seeurity and its stable market, is of the Sort to com- mend itself t6 the mest conservative investor, THOMAS H, BEOKLEY, 278 Main 8¢, Representing Turner, Tueker & Co., jan24d - Roston Banker LOST AND FOUND. EOSE_Male yellow hound shephc dog. Finder return to . R. Burdick, 51 'Fenth St., and receivé reward. | Bill Smith; but as it ’appen Centrat Buttans. Norwich. Conn. || man for the place.” | ell Struthers Burt, in Serib- 0 SLERP. Take me upon thy breast, O river of rest, aw me down to thy side, Blow-moving tide, Carry out beyond réach Of ‘song or of speech This body and soul forespent, To thy still continent, Where sflence hath its home, Where 1 would come, Bear me now In thy deep Bosom sleep O Sleen. —Grace Fallow Norton, in Atlantic. THE AUTOMOBILE. The freedom of roads that go winding along Like 1bbons of silver and gold, By orchards and meadows, and gardens and woods, And rivulets crystalline cold: And a fair panorama of, viilas and A SONG O farms As the milestones away from you reel Are only a few of the pleasures tnat With the price of an automobile, A rose on the cheek, and a song in the heart. An eye that is steady and clear, An_appetite equal to pickles and pie Without a gastronomic fea; A spirit at peace and in tune with world And nerves that are tempered to steel, Are some of the pleasures of health that you get When buying an automobile, The honk of the horn has a magleal note That charms all your troubles away And the hum of Lie motor invites y to Zo Where the blossoms and birds are play. There is somowhere a racy new mode of speed Awaiung my hand on the wheel So put on your hat, and together we =0 And pur hase an, automobile. Minna frving, in Leslie's HUMOR OF THE DAY Felter—What is his place in the fin« ancial world?2, : Skeltetr —He's among the a ousined.—Life. She—There’'s always a crowd round o lim-< the dear old professor. He's such a wonderful conversationalist He—Lor’ You really think so? T tried him just now on every possible topic—hounds, bridge, golf, music halls, everything—and he was simply useless, —Punch. She (whispering in church )—Tisten. Tsn't 1t ridiculous? The choir is chant- ing Shall We Know One Another Over There? He— What's funny about that? She—They are all so jealous of one | another even the pastor can't, bring them to speaking terms,—St. “Louis Republic, Friend (admiring the prodigy)—S: enth standard, is she? Plays the pi ner an’ talks French like a native, bet, Fond But Touchy Parent—I've n doubt_that's meant to be ve: only exposin’ yor ignorance; the natives in France—they're as wh wot we are.—Sketch. Lecturer—All ove 5 the blonde woman is more difficult to get alons with than the brunettes. Astonished Man in the Audience (starting up)—Are you certain of th n—Then I believe is dved.—Philadelphia Telegraph. “That Nobel pr! of was not awarded this year.” ‘Why not “Nobo to ote fpencert s i aramba I could have got up =, | revolution ang you could have stopped it We s poor business men. - Louisville Cour -Journal. “An acre of ground that mow s orts two people will have to sup- port a thousand in days to come. “Well, it _can probably do it,” as- serted Mr. Wombat. “T used to bare support myself. Now I support a wife, four children, a mother-in-law and two of my wife’s brothers, and I dor seem to feel the strain very much ore.”—Pittsburgh Post. 0 vou want me to support Wom- > sald the prac- citizens. On what grounds?" On the grounds that he is the ablest “Um! Now what other qualifica- Washington Herald. DSCOPE People who throw bouquets at them- selves are not nec rily fond of flow - tions has he’ i e One way to avoid being bothered by vour relations is to be poorer than the are. The successful man is one who is on the job when the main chance comes along. The girl who mar a man because he is a good dancer is apt to regret it In after years that a spendthri was born with ay come to pass hasn't the cents he ome men won't be haapy in heaven becausa they had to leave their earthly possessions behind. The mere fact that a man docsn't laugh at his own jokes is no indication that he doesn't think them funny Probably a man never appbciates his wife so clearly as when he wants to use her as an excuse for not going to war. The one way a man can win anarg- ument with a woman is to state his sige of the case, then siam the door behing him. On the mistaken theory that there s always reom for one more, many a man tries to take home a bigger load than he Is capable of carrying, After a girl ha: = A every other w- to get a_propesal and failed, she takes to standing at the side door with her sieeves rolled up,and an apron on.