New Britain Herald Newspaper, May 15, 1929, Page 6

(Sunday Wscepted) - Daily P A Moreld Budg. 67 Church Strest % — 5 RATES $9 s Toor $3.00 Three Moeaths T6c. & Month Baterod st the Pest Ofics at New Britain % Sesend Ciame Mail Matier. reftable sdvertisiag medium i “City.”Girculstion books and pree The Ameciated Press ia titled_te the us for all_news credited to it credited in this paper news published therei circulstion. Our clrculatien Dased upea this sudit. Th tection against fraud in tributien figures to both lJecal advertisers. The Hersld is em sale daily in New York at_ Wotsling's Newsstand. Times Square: Schults's Newastands, Eatrance Grand Cestrsl Ind Stre e E————— In about & year from Nnow a new achool will be under construction in Berlin, but just where is anybody's guess. 8o far three members of the acheol board have quit, possibly upon the assumption that an easy way to make enemies is to decide the achool question. Ultimately the skedaddle will be settled and future historians will allude to it as one ot those things which temporarily rut- fied the public mind but left ne I ing difculties. In other' words, it is just as easy to be optimistic as to be pessimistic, even in connection with a school issue. If what was done In Ware, M to insure a quorum at u town m ing becomea generally adopted there never need to be any fear of fallure te attend such gatherings. In Ware, it will have been noted, the town's fire apparatus was called out and the siren blown until enough citizens had gathered along the main drag, when the call was sent along that attendance at the town meeting was desirable. All towns inflicted with general inertia to attend town meetings now know how to whoop up a crowd. 8o we¢ are to have the annual cleanup campaign, and to make it certaln that citizens realize the in- tentions of the foes against dirt three publicity . hounds have been .appointed to attend to the whoopee. We.doubt whether all the accumu- lated refuse lying around can be . cleaned up within a week. Why not ““make it a month? .go-getting reporter's idea of ,.a live story in connection with the trip of the Graf Zeppelin is one in which that gorilla on board gets Ioose during the trip. v A SPLENDID PARADE The Od4 Fellows parade in this city ‘was elaborate. Officials of the state convention of the order are to be congratulated upon the turnout. Altheugh the damp weather exerted & depressing effect upon the thou- sands lined along the line of march, appreciation of the spectacle was widespread. Visiting Connecticut lodges made a most gratifying impression, both as to numbers and costuming. Every. thing the city could do. for their en- tertainment was done; only the weather man failed to co-operate. Regardless of the drizzle, however, the visiting delegations bravely and gayly went through with their marching and seemed to enjoy it as well as the onlookers. It was a grand victory for the fraternal spirit. r ¢ [the total of actual g on upor a subscription basis. Oanly in the case of the third and final con. cert of the season—in which the Choral society participstéd—did tnon-subscribers have access to the event. The choral society concert, by the way, was far above the general average given in concert courses in cities of this size. 3 Financially the asituation is one that evidently requires careful study. ‘The choral concerts cost much more to provide than the artists concerts, It is poassible to give artists concerts alone, or it is possible te include the choral concerta under the patronage of those public-spirited citizens who ¢t |believe the city is_entitied to have them. These are among the policies that will be discussed in further de- tail. It will always be a question as to music lovers in this city. Assuming the city has a population of 80,000, and that there are 20,000 additional roundabout to draw upon, there would be 100,000 people to appeal to. The music asso- ciation had less than 1,000 members, and it is hoped that during the com. ing year it will have that tetal, As- suming that it will, this would amount to one person out of every 100 hereabouts a member of the as- sociation. Certainly double this num. ber ought to be found willing to at- tend a first class concert. How conditions are elsewhere is worthy of comparison. New York is regarded as a musical city. We have always doubted whether it is as musical as it is cracked up to be. Greater New York prides itself upon having a population of more than 6,000,000. Now, if one out of every 100 citizens there is a music lover— and that certainly is the case here- abouts—there woyld be 60,000 music lovers prepared to attend concerts on any one day, week-days or Sun. days, in the metropolis. Nothing like that ever happens. 1t it did there would be need for a dosen Carnegie halls to hold the crowds. “As a matter of fact, audiences of 2,000 people have been known to at- tend concerts here, which would be one in 50 of the population, lecal and surrounding. On the same basis of two per cent of the population this would produce an audience of 120,000 in Greater New York. Noth- ing like this is likely to occur in the great musical center on the Hudson. Not that many people attend con- certs during an entire week in that city, including those zealous music lovers who attend them! in a row. There is evidence all over the country that most amaller cities and towns are more musical per ratio of population than the great cities; but the latter have the best concerts and in the largeat number merely be- cause of their \« populations. it only ene per ‘cent of the popula- |tion of mny large city attends con- certs during a week the total of peo- ple trying to gain entrance into the auditeriums defies the accommoda- tiona. But it doesn't necessarily fol- low that there are more music lovers to the bleck than in the small places. The figures would prove the con- trary. It merely happens that when cities lack the population frem which to extract onc per cent ef music lovers willing to listen 1o offer- ings that there is undue trouble for concert promoters. Such a city, man tor man and woman for woman, will show a vastly greater proportion ef music lovers than the metropolitan cities. It secems to us to assume that New Britain possesses a fair ra- tio of muaic lovers to its populatien, although that does not solve the problem of concert prometion, If it were not for the high ratio of mu. #ic lovers in the smaller cities con- certs in such places would be im- possible. New Britain aims to re. main on the musical map, and if only one per cent of the population knew where to ge.* He reterred’te the tact that Maryland 1o ene of the three states that has refused te give the federal goverament co-operation in enforcing prohibition. Does that mean, however, that there are more speakeasies in Baitimore than, sy, in Philadelphia or in hington ? Or in Connecticut, for that matter? Dr. Whaon made a mistake in en. tering into & debate with Mr. Dar- row. The latter nearly monopolised the logic, m > the firat time'that concerts were give [still buy liquer in Baltimere ~if eae FOREIGN COMPETITION Foreign competition in American markets is not so serious as it som times ia painted. Some industries, of course, sufter from foreign compe- tition much more than others; seme, in fact, suffer no fereign competion at all, but rather, successfully com- pete with foreign goods in foreign markets. Goods valued at $90,000,000,000 are sold in American markets by American industries every year, and only $4,000,000,000 of foreign goods are sold in the American market. The latter total, compared with the total of goods of American manufac- ture, runs into an even lesd ratio when the realization is made plain that a great deal of the four billions in importa consi of raw mater which we do not grow but must have to supply our own industries. { The total of imports, dutiable and free combined, is less than our total of exports. There has been an excess of exports ever imports since con- siderably before the turn of the cen- tury Although the President is maid to teel strongly on this point, he h acted quickly in behalt of higher tariffs on certain rural preducts, in. creasing the duties on milk, cream, and flaxseed—under the flexible pro- visions of the tariff law—by §0 per cent. This plan te aid the farmers seems to be more to his liking than the plan to aid industry, which he is said to think is already well enough protected, although he also added a similar increase in the case of window glass, which is an impor- tant industry in Pennsylvania. The increased duties en milk strike a blow at Canadien milk preducers; the window glass increase atrikes at Belgium and Czechoslovakia, There increasea under the flexible tarift provision are important to aftected; but also are important te consumers. There has been a large increase in importations of Canadian cream and milk in recent years, and the cort of production is slightly less in Canada than in the United States. The President’'s move evi- dently is to equalize the cost of pro- duction and place both Amecrican and foreign products on an equal bi in the American market, Much argument, pro and con, will be heard upon this subject in the future. A DEMOCRATIC ‘EKNESS EXCEPT— are executive There ‘positions world's greatest business—which re- quire as high a type of ability as de- manded by our mightiest of cor- | porations. But government salaries 'are ridiculously low compared with similar types of executive-positions in private employment. The govern- ment actually expects men able to earn a six-figure salary (o enter gov- ernment employ at figures ranging from $10,000 te $20,000. Mest of the pay, it seems, comes in the form of honer. It is a credit to a large number of men in the employ of the goevern- ment, therefore, that they will con- descend to enter such employment at salaries one-quarter or less of what they can earn in private lite. This. of course, does not apply to poli- American producers of the products ! Wo calied all ;this s “demecratic weakness” O ’the other hand. it also 1a & domogratic streagth. It i somethiag creditable te & demecracy such as that under which we live that it can command the unselfish Iabors of experts at ridiculousiy low | compensation. It is & credit to the citizenship that is willing to tender its ability and wisdom te the govern- ment on low terms. Facts and Fanci Be sure yeur newspaper chases will find you out, alse. Frenzied vocal reaction in the farm belt when call money en Wall Street goes to 20 per cent.. “Ho, hum. pur- The great man really is misquoted in print. The interviewer usually corrects his grammar, Fable: She was very sensitive, but she wasn't proud of it and didn't tell anybedy. Peaches should be plentiful this time. The crop has been ruined only aeven times this Spring, instead of the usual ten. Another nice thing to do with left-overs is to place them in an open dish, meisten with milk, and feed to the dog. Faith is the quality that makes the price of land double when con- gress promises farm relief, The difficulty in buying & news- paper's influence is that the one that can be bought hasn’t any influence. The impertant question is: Can Mrs. Gann butt in ahead of the line at the ticket window? “Another brutal The dead man's inions weren't like min Oh, well; served him right.” Americanipm: L] Human nature doesn’t change, and when Fall came in the Garden, Eve doubtless blamed Adam for acattering the leavea everywhere, The woman whe bought & violet ray lamp last winter will seen Le telling the children to keep out of the hot sun, ’ The Klan is going back to Atlan. ta—home (o the South, as anether organisation did after wearing itaelf out lieking the North. Another advantage of the milk- shake is that you needn't stand and drink eix to prove yoursel! a good tellow, At the end of the third gloomy, rainy day, you wonder why the an. clents conceived of hell as a pla without moisture. There is no historical recerd of any people that ever became great on a diet of peanut butter sand- viches, Weather éxperts say a houss ex- plodes in a cyclone because of a vacuum, but it deesn't zound rea- sonable. You never saw a head ¢x- plode, . {We divided the property,” said one within the federal government—the |f tends.” The opposite of tact is what (DM| nurse reveals when she says casual- lv: “Why, yours was just a simple appendix c: wasn't §¢2" Correct this sentence: “And then of the heirs, d parted as good Copyright 1929 Publishers Syndicate 25 Vears _i;_o Today Btanley Works will close down | Monday in honor of William H. Hart who will celebrate his 50th an- nivérsary as treasurer of the con- cern. A loving cup will be pre- sented to Mr. Hart, the gift of the employes, A. H. Wood announced teday that he would retire from the watch and clock business after 35 years cf service, A mumber of New Britain car- riages have heen hired for the parade in Hartford next week. Themas Roper and Michael Souney, the newly appointed per- manent fire department drivers, will art their duties tomorrow. The retiring driver is Jehn A. Scheuck. And Well Help Kxplore Thom! For anarchy and all its woes The sort of treatment we propose Is fun-archy, throughout the earth Exploding bombs of cheer and mirth! \ The Object! Wilson: “I've got a new car &nd I really can't afford it." Griffin: “A man 1s foolish trying to impress the neighbers.” ‘Wilgen: “It isn't the meighbora, We're trying to impress the cook! “Look out, B! trump it!" — CHINATOWN (IN NEW YORK) By A. G. Muckerman The most amasing things, they say, Occur in Chinatown by day, While eerie circumatances quite Beyond belief disturb the night Near Mott and Pell and Doyer. Down there iU's no surprise to find Dead men, murdered from behind, of every kind, t to shyster lawyer. Elly's going to The peeple live on varnished rice, Ancestral eggs and pickled mice; They cramp their feet in tiny shoes And strange people with their , aueues Near Doyer, Mott, and Pell. Dark, secret passages abound That run te Chine underground, And baek of A resking T've heard that all their evil haunte Are filled with captive debutantes Whom scheming Jaundrymen betray And chloroform and spirit away To Dover, Pell, and Mott. For Chinatown is full of dangers, Hatcheteers an1 moncy-changers, And when it comes to Kknifing strangeras— They'd just as soon as not! All of these tales are true. T know; !The bus announcer told me so! Identified! First Drunk: “You seemsh to have a foreign accentsh in ygur voicesh.” Second Drunk: *“Yeh, I guess thash-a Scotch in me!” —F. R. Troller —_— Alice in Wonderland The girls call her Alice. hecaus> sho is always wendering when she's ‘going to land him! ¥rom Our Children's Garden of Curses! Junior had been watching aeroplane fiy over his heuse. “Mother,” he said, “if that plane sheuld fall, the man in #t would be killed, wouldn't he “Junior, you must be optimistic,” answered his mother. “Did you say I ‘must be up (o mischief'?" asked Junier. —Mrs. A. M. Cohen an THE DEMI-TASSE By Charles F. Hart you. It's not real coffee, you know. “Try it, my dear; it won't hurt Honestly, it won't keep you awake. Reporter: had every desire fulfilled?” Mitliensire: “All but one.” Reporter: “And that is?" Milllonaire (looking cautiously abeut): “Te dry my hands on one of our guest towels!" 3 ~—Janet McCrudde: (Copyright, 1939, Reproduction Ferbidden) You can get an answer to any question of fact er information by writing to the Question Editor, New Britain Herald, Washingten Bureau, 1322 New York avenue, Washington, D. C., enclosing two cents in stamps for reply. Medical, legal and marital advice cannot be given. nor can es- tended research be undertaken. All other questions will receive a per- sonal reply. Unsigned requests can- not be answered. All letters are confidential.--Editor. Q. How many daily and weekly newspapers are there in the United States? A. There are 2,215 daily and 1,765 weekly newspapers in conti- nental United States. Q. Are patives of Alaska, the Virgin Islands and Hawali citizens of the United States? A. Alaska, the Virgin Islands and Hawaii are territories of the United States and the natives therefore are citizens. Q. When a grandfather, a father and a son, all living, bear the same name how are they distinguished? A. The grandfather is called “senior’; the father ‘*junior” and the son is “third". Q. Do females outnumber males in Eurepe? A. In Europe females generally outnumber males, the figures rang- ing from 1,002 females to 1,000 males in Buigaria, to 1,224 females to 1,000 mal in Russia, The figures are for 1920. Q. What is the theme song of the picture “Gang War?” A. "My Suppressed Desire". Q. In going dewn stairs does a gentleman precede a lady or vise versa? A. If the stairs are broad enough, the gentleman should descend with the lady; otherwise the lady de- scends ahead of the gentleman. Q. What is the meaning of the wame Lauretta? A. It is an English girl's name from the Latin meaning. “a laurel”. Q. How much forest reserve land is there in’ Continental United States and Alaska? A Approximately acres. Q. Who was Eris? A. The Greek goddess of discord. Q. Who wrote “Gentiemen Pre-| fer Blondes”? A. Anita Loos. ‘What is the value of a United States nackel five-cent piece dated 1883 with the word “cents” on it? A. Tt is worth only its face value. Q. What do the names Annabel, Frances and Velma mean? A. Annabel means Frances means “free” and means *‘bloom”. Q. Who invented munication? A. Radio communication is not an inventien. The theory was known long before anybody was able te apply it in practice. Numerous inventors were trying to devise ap- paratus that would make the theory work. Fer this reason, several dif- ferent practical systems of wireless telegraphy appeared at about the same time. Marconi had the good 159,000,000 “grace™; Velma radio com- Kaeck off the fumps of mor- tar, with g scrapdf. also scrape off the mortar s Where . they are heavy, and,'vemeve ce by sponging with & mixtpre. of equal parts of commercial, muriatic, acid and seft water, which will soften and ‘remove the mortar. Finally wash with clear w. Q. What is the composition of air? A, About one-fitth oxygen and fqur-fifths nitrogen. -Air also con- tains about four parts per 10,000 of carbon dioxide, a varying amount of water vapor, and small amounts of ammonia and certain rare gases, as argon and neon. Q. Where is the most powerful lighthouse beacon in the world? A. At Heligoland, Germany. has 38,000,000 candle power. Q. What proportion of the popu- lation of Mexico is Roman Catholic? A. According to the latest figures available, there are in Mexico Roman Catholics; 73,951 22,718 other faiths: | 208,863 faith unknown. The total Population is 14,334,750, Q. Are passports required of American citizens who go to Cuba, Mexico, Canada and Bermuda? A. Not for direct travel to those countries. - Q. Can a diamond be cracked? .| A. “While it is true that the dia- mond is the hardest of all gems it is also true that it may be cracked or chipped by a blow. Observations On The Weather Washington, May 15.—Forecast for Bouthern New England: Mostly cloudy tonight and Thursday: not much change in temperature, Mod- erate southerly winds. Forecast for Eastern New York: Generally fair tonight; Thursday in- creasing cloudiness followed by showery and thunder stornts in aft- ernoon; cooler Thursday in extreme west portion; cooler Thursday night; tresh southwest or south winds. Conditions: A long trough of low preasure prevails this morning from New Mexico northeastward to Lake Buperior with centers near St. Paul, Minn., 29.70 inches and 29.80 inches at Banta Fe, N. M. The cen- It EYES EXAMINED Frank E. Goodwin Optical Specialist 328 Main St. Glasses Fitted Sheridan. 5 Showers were reported over near all nerthern districts east of -the northern plains states and tempera- tures range between 55 and 70. Conditions favor for this vicinity unsettied weather with slowly rising temperature, Temperatures yesterday: High 80 58 66 64 70 7 82 4 80 70 82 70 58 Atlants ..... Atlantic City ... Boston Ciacinnati . Denver .’ Duluth .. Hatteras . . T.os Angeles ... Miami Minneapolis . Nantueket . Nashville New Haven ... Norfolk, Va. Northfield, Vt. Portland, Me. . Pittsburgh . 8t. Louis ... Washington . Of the 1,157 motor ships in serv. ice during 1920, only 27 flew the American flag. ? y;h““"', LONG CREDIT This is the only story T know about a Scottish Quaker. This esti- mable man was a coal-merchant and one day he was delivering a cart- load of coals at a big house. On coming out of the side ent after “tipping” a bag of his wares he saw a thief walking off with a large lump . of coal evidently stolen from his car. Running after the man he said: “Friend, dost thou realise that thou wilt have to pay dearly for that bit of coal at the Last Day?" “Last Day, did you say?" asked the errant Scot. “If the credit is as long as that I'll just run hame wi this lump an' come back for an- ither.” Bl (o (Copyright throughout the world)’ (Copyright 1928 by John F. Dille Co.) HOW JOR! that the British the Britishers have own, Our Washington Bureau has prepared a comprehensi tive bulletin on the British Parliamentary System. the British “constitution;” of parlisment and of the responsible BULL DORS IT The British are about to hold m general el ion. Tn spite of tha fact been said thst ment than our nd authorita- including the history of cabinet Avstem of Great ritain. It ia full of facts and Information on the English government system that you will want te know about. Fill out the coupon below and send for it: = == == em == ®CLIP COUPON NERE ™ == == o= o= POLITICAL HISTORY EDITOR, W hington Bureau, New Britain Herald, 1322 New York Avenue, Washington, D. C. T want a copy of the Bulletin BRITISH PARLIAMENTARY RYSTEM And enclom herswith five centa in coin, or loose, uncancelled, U. 8. | postége stamps, to cover pestage and handling costs: NAME , 1 am a reader oi the New Britain Herald, RSP R S fortune to be first, but he distanced West Tooperville Ne'ws Item By Fontaine Fox AUNT EPPIE HodG, THE FATTEST WOMAN 1N 3 GOUNTIES, and you cen't possibly tell the dif- ference. It tastes exactly the same. The only difference is that it wen't keep you awake. Harry and I drink WAS “THE VICTIM OF A MoST UNUSUAL ASCIDENT RECENTL WHEN $OME |DIOT ToSSED AWAY A LIGHTED CIGARETTE. of the city and environs jein in the effort the finest of musical events ticians who could not earn much in | private life anyway, but to these The Teutonia Mannerchor seciety serenaded H Samlow at his hems last evening, the eccasion being hie STUNTING, ON THE RAILS Traveling 60 miles an hour along the branch line of the New Haven railread running through Thomaston has received the formal denunciation of the Interstate Commerce Com- mission, which after investigating the fatal wreck of last January, indicates the line is not capable of permitting high speed. 1t is gratifying to receive official confirmation of this fact from this high source. Why the engineer turn. ed on the throttle in that manner will never be ascertained; he is dead. He disoheyed special instructions never to exceed a speed of 35 miles an hour. In other he traveling nearly as fast as railroad regulations permitted Just like air stunts usually lead to the deathe of stunting aviators, se | rail stunts still lead to disaster along | the rails. words, was twice TRE M b AND MUSIC LOVERS Having tentatively decided to con- tinue its pregram of providing local artist concerts next season, the Ciuic Music Association continues to func tien. Details and further discussion of policies will continue in a week oy ,90. Thus It is evident that the asso- ciation’s first season is 1o serve as a guide for the future. would be possible. A MEAN THRUST The jeers and heckling that came to Dr. Clarence True Wilson during his debate with Clarence Darrow in Baltimore evidently gave the star prohibitionist an epportunity to paint 4 dismal moral by referring te some past history in Baltimore. The sentleman perhaps showed poor taste, but he went at it regardiess of the emotions of his hearers. Balti- more was the city. he shouted, in which the movement of Union troops during the Civil War was subject to interference; indeed. the first bleod of the war was shed on the streets of the city, when Massachusetts regi- ments, passing between railroad sta tions—there having been no throug line in those days—were attacked by mobs and shooting became neces- sary. Maryland. however, remainsd in the Union. The state had sons fight- Ing on hoth sivies of the Civil War issue. And in 1895 at the outbreak of the Spanish-American war, the rame Massachusetts regiments pass- ed through the city amid a barrage of roses instead of bricks and ceb- blestones. That. in the oplnion ef Baltimoreans, aptiy made up for thi |incident during the Civil War, Dr. little more. | high-minded men who willingly set aMde the opportunity to earn a large salary in order to sérve the govern- ment and the people. Frequently they enter into such service at a net loes to themselves, it frequently cost. ing them more to live than they re- ceive from the government. Charles E. Hughes instantly comes to mind as a notable example. When he was a member of the Supreme Court it is said he was well satisfied and probably would have remained upoen that august tribunal to t day had it not been for the presidential nomination in 1916, which caused him to resign. Then, when he was defeated hy Mr. Wilson, he “return. ed to private life"—and now ia credited with earning sums in six [ gures every year as a leading prac- titioner at the bar. Just now there is something simi- lar in the wind. The farm relief |l1egislation being passed will require {#ome experts at the head of the Ilnlm board. The salaries will he $12,- [000 & year, the chairman perhaps a Their responsibilities iam)M be valued by a private cor. "poration at around $150,000 a year. :l"or upon their good judgment and 1a\'Hol\ will depend the prosperity of | quarter of the eitizens of the United States—the agricultural php. The experiment of the first year of | Wilson, however, did not mention it. | ulation. They will decide the policien the Civic Musio Association was not- able in local music history. It was Of course. Dr. Wilson got a big laugh when he declared one could that will affect hundreds of millions ‘BI dollars in values. birthday anniversary. There was & large attendance at the war symposium in the Center church chapel last evening. Tie papers were read by Major W. W. Bullen, Everett C. Hoffman. Charles Phelps and A. A. Daly. After the papers there was an open discussion on the phases of the war. Tt was necessary te close down the American Hosiery plant yesterday afternoon because seme employe had maliciously cut the main belt duriag the noon hour. It was surmiséd jthat someone wanted a haif holiday ’hed enough to put the company ‘o |several hundred dollars loss to ob- tain it. - Blamed for Air Wreck Providence, R. 1. May 15.—M— Lack of seund flying judgment in stunting with Ris biplane at insufi. cient altitude, caused the death of Pilot Major O. Cayler and his mechanic, Ralph Kirker, when their plane crashed in this city last night, according to a report filed last night by the aviatien investigating com- mittee of the Providence chamber of commerea. Caylor's actien in guiding his plane inte an inside loop at a dis- tance of approximately 300 feet from | the ground was given as the direct | cause of the failure of the plane to | right itself. No failure of the motor te function properly was found. 1 services for the dead pilot will be held in this city temorrew after which the hedy will be sent to Florida, Alabama. Kirker, who lived will be buried to- morrow. it every night and it never keeps us awake, does it, Harry? . . . I'll bet If 1 didn't tell you it was fake, you would never know the difference. “Go ahead, my dear—you'd bet. ter try a cup. I'm sure you'll enjoy it as much as u demi-tasse of real coffee. 1t 1ooks and tastes the same as the real thing. The only differ- ence is that they've taken the caf- feine out and—it won't keep you awake, Harry and T used to stay awake by the hour until we tried this Sanker; now we go right to sleep, don’t we Harry? “The beauty of it is that it tastes the same as real coffee and it makes 2 nica hot demi-tasse for after di ner. We've served it for the pa: vear or more and everybody swears it's real coffee. Harry and I did so hate the thought of having to give up our after dinner coffee. Neither of us were getting our sleep, were we, Harry? . . . “Go ahead, my dear—do try a cup; you won't be able to detect the slightest difference and I'll guaran- tee you won't lose a wink of sleep. One or twe lumpa? . . . There! Now, doesn’t that taste exactly like coffee ™" Have At 'Em! Rartell: “The Attorney General should gird on his swerd to battle for the peopie’s rights.” Adams: “Yes, he has a position of public thrust:” —G. H. Stover Arrange to have the lady of your choice peel seme potatees. If she cuts thick parings, she is extrava- sant, so beware. If in only water, she is net very clean. If she leaves in the “eyes” she is