New Britain Herald Newspaper, September 8, 1927, Page 6

NEW BRITAIN DAILY HERALD, THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER &, 1927. New Britain Herald HERALD PUBLISHING COMPANY Tesued Daily (Bunday Excepted) At Herald Bldg. 67 Church Street BUBSCRIPTION RATES $3.00 & Year. $3.00 Three Montha 75 a Month Entered at the Post Office at New Erit- aln as Becond Class Mall Matter. TELEPHONE CALLS I Business Office ... 326 . Editortal Rooms .... 926 [ the The only profitable advertising medt: is tr in the City. Circulation books and prees | prowi room always open to advertisera. Member of tho As The Amsoclated Pres ta exclusively eu titled to the use for re-publication cf all news credited to it or not otherwle: credited fn this paper and also local Gews published therein. clated Pre Member Audlt Bureau of Circulation The A. B. C. ' a national organization which furnt newspapers And mdver tisers with a strictly honest analveis ol eirculation. Qur circulation etatistics are o based upon this audit. This insures pro- tection against fraud iIn Dewspaper d L tribution figures to both natiomal and | . .. local advertisers. [ The Herald 1 on sale dally 1o Ne. | in 1i York st Hotallng's Newsstand, Times > Schultz's Newegands, Entrance 4204 Street. Square; Grand Central, No amount of education ca the gamble out of success, A local optimist is somebody who ¢ thinks traffic at the Center cannot get any worse. The complaint is now heard that the newspapers too much about aviation. They are “up /and a in the air,” so to speak. are printing lie Utilities Commissior v E i N - teler nd ¢ ady for e utility s are prepared in A mind-reader is a speaker who New Britain lawy while delivering his talk says, *I "¢marked that it is quite uscless to know you think this speech ls al- | Start anything” in opposition. that ready too long.” {public utilities always got “what L they want.” Failures of channel swimmers| ~NeW Britain does not stund pear this year leads to the assumption '€ 1o In the per ubserip- that the English channel is not so 10" f0 telephon The rec easy to swim after all. ord in this city is in the neighbor- hood of one one to eight in- By the way, the Connecticut com- ' ne In some citics in the state pany calls 'em “busses,” while its ) reLlogls one losttve. 1t near relative, the N England , P°ne company can put o Transportation company, calls ‘em CT®25¢ af 1 ng most residence tele- “motor coaches.” ‘What we have yet to understand is this: When every city and town has an airport, will that mean that mail and express planes are going to plck up cargoes at every station in s some than o te would 1 nt likely T the 1d loon ay 1 like the Waterbury local? jalso moi g e e Rone The Springf Republican de- [ People as mands to know whether there was- | 10Uge phor W't 100 much express on the plane '¥- A phor which dropped and killed a estch Connecticut the other day. The Co- Al t lonial company and the An in ENGCR DL Fxpress company are in no hurpry "0t reach 1o make reply. means. Tk THE TELEPHONE SITUATION 707 AND INCREASED RA than Gn One of the stellar prosperous com- | *N0Ther v panies in the public utility fi LAY the American Telephone and | graph, the “parent of the Bell tele- | PATH phone companies. This off T them all” takes from the gross r Glory w enues of each ot its oper sub- | weigh sidiaries 4 pe s payn light 1 certain services, which include the li Supply transmitters, reccivers and | past induction cotls v 1 The right to use all Bell patents, (o gamble new apparatus and new 1= id i A guaranty against infringement| Did J. D. suits, o Help of an elaborat 1« i research taf i Financing at 6 per cent Aid in promoting el- | stant? A fare of worke:s. L a The right to pass on to companies the benefit of t Bell ‘ research and ad Regulatory bodie to t rate h he ady ! vices of A & com e Bel . method of y like, 1 1 and ir T A st ing exam vas given N York Public Co year or 5o ago. { In 102 the New nn i, putation of 1 « Rross rever S nec iy (o ues the mor 1 « r these rever rates. Such cal ¢ never- To the credit of the A. T nding must the exaction ag inst gro of subsidiaries has Loy from 4 1-2to4 per cont, t ring about a ago-—pre a result of the criticism aforer tioned. The rate increase desired Southern New England T¢ . ‘ company will go Into 1 October. Tn Connecticut permission | Wit need not be secured from the Pub- wai 1 Y RV o0 o1 will be this 1 off the peach. to owners possibly 100 now does vhicl only the American D GLORY " it in Old 1 opy i fransoceani 1 not and 1 i i HOUSES rgage t time the post- lings has [ for cased up a bit, is more regard day afternoon. a 400-pound cornice uality beneath the surface, as well falling upon two fingers. A gold ' bund on one finger was flattened good looks which only paint good hoare only PAIN ooinet the bone and was removed deep. by a jeweler. Mr. Magauley also referred with e RN ir fer i 1 | sis to the way in which our| shire i F F ? . of trees has been wel d o N dnes e e e dacts and Fancies | L Tamber supply has been elimin- | BA RV ited and wood is being brought he Higher priced cotfon won't help in large quantities from the Pacific the poor tenant farmer much. The ast, where it is being produced on uew Fords will e nore. i e tine-tricd plan of ruthless cut- = i e e Tt is casy to pick out the true fan. s €8 without adequate Y€ 4fy g against any ball team that is planting. In a comparatively feW 100 far ahead. ATS 1 western heritage of lum- ey ber also will dwindie. Reforostation Still some dry furies will convict is an essential, but it takes time, and % Murderer just as promptly as they will a hootlegger. the profits are not immediate i = Connecticut’s once fine oak and ' You don't know how to make Hple trees are gone, They were not friends? Rats! Man loves the dog | Sodl £0r Limiter! elthas milllons: Decausestheldog) adores hir f of fect having been burned to pro-| ¢ it ig true rhat wopien decide S0 ide space for agriculiure, The state per cent of all purchases, it only has a sccond growth which is Froves that males love prace morc s for tin r. The sad situation than victory. sunk into the skulls of nu- officials. reforestation s now popular. Some day the state I the remainder of New England ill have good timber lands: but not -ation pened so far is a serions dra n upon ybody who buys a house or pays the k of foresight in the past has greatly helped to increase e cost of living in the present, LR BUS TIME r service on the Berlin buss- will not be due to better and The speed if somebody else furnishes the company will furnish the smooth will have been noticed that after the started busses to Berlin the paving of the washboard pike suddenly took on the earmarks company to run reality. The company seems to have had more influence than the | Chamber of Commerce or the other committees and organizations which for a long time “fought for" this road improvement. We wish the Connecticut company ould Meriden isses over pass road; begin running its Cat Hole the then there might be a chance for an carly improvement of this ancient thoroughfore, OPPOSITION “ON PRINCIP In opposing the g anting of a bus line permit an official of the Boston & Maine railroad made the follow ing statement: “If our passenger trade suf- ers we'll simply have to put the burden on our freight rates, and will suffer, We that this one line wreek the railroad; it is 10 general principle of company getting into a and t, the cream we protest against.” no doubt n business vould rather , such a territory ihat The claim King bus lines get the ream” of the short haul passen- g.r business where competing rail- and give Boston & methods of the New Haven and went into the motor road lines deqn; Maine are inefficicnt i te service, If the followed the coach business on a large scale some of this cream could be saved. In- vad of that, the railroad wishes to torce the public to be satisfied with inadequate service and ke it [ The reference to “putting the bur- den on freight rates” doesn't hold r, either. The twin brothers of Lus lines, the trucks. are also g heard from and judging by the number of them met upon the pub lic highways they are transporting the v the way, which rable freight. Wasn't it Boston & Maine, vanted o junk New r and freight traffic? numerous branch lines in Hampshire, regardless In this business ot transportation, in who best public should be allowed everything clse, 25 Years Ago Today of New Britain Holcomb of South- Attwood Marens H on are among those summoned nd jury duty at the murder 1 of Joseph (inzewish of South Seeretary €. A, FEricson has re- 1o 1 the lists of delegates from [nearly all of the 20 clubs In | the Swedich-American Republican leazne, which will hold its conven- '1ion in Vega hall tomerrow. Among the prominent repnblicans who have n invited are "nator A. Slop- s-Senator Muzzy, Charles Hop- ns Clark. Colonel (. H. Moore, L.} 1 fild, August Burckhardt Otto Bengtson, J. L. Doyle and ! s Cog ine. Rev, 8 G Ohman « nan Hatch of the isolation tal committee told a Herald r ) r tod that the ¢ ractor malking satisfactory progress on i 's. The bullding will be « pleted within a short time, i Sweee of Manehester and Matty thews of Brooklyn will Lox 20 rounds at 140 pounds at the Casino this evening under the au- i of the Pastime A, O, Cyptain Themas Brady of the *h school foo'ball team has ealled out for practice this atternoon the members of last year's team and w candidates. John Mechan, a ormer captain, will coach the eley- o 1wong th terans are Cryne, Chamberlain, Wainright and ay night at the Russwin first time here at popular | prices, th great Lewis Maorrison's’ production ust Brocken complets See the prologue, cene, and clectrical effects. Fred Sharp, the mason. met with ,a painful accident while at work at ‘the Central Grammar school yester- of new What has hap- | ster busses, but to better road pav- | s-a-board highway. And it An experteneed wifs is one who | can nod at the right times as her man holds forth and keep her [m)l‘vi on something else | | There aren’t many grave issies {“'«-»n a candidate helps himself to a cigarette instead of offering you a cigar. Tt it is a “special refinement” put on the car ta serve as a talking voint, it won't do anything but rat- Ue. “How does it work?" the asked. “It’s not so good,” said he. I'm looking under C.” Stingy ! Wiley: “They say Dr. Cla very stingy.” Huston: “Yes. indeed.” Wiley: I understand even on his office-equipment Huston: “That's right. He ried that skinny Fraser girl Send all communications (0 Fun | 16 civu buying a skelston to Shop Editor, care of the New |/ e Britain Herald, and your letter || —\eta F. Ra will be forwarded to New York. —_— Killing Of the “Bunk:" Against the pests of vegetation. The farmer's weapon is the spray, Let's save our crop of conversation | And spray the hunbug, Folks, we | | (Copyright. 1927 Reproduc! orbidden) The Right Place Dr. Pearson: “T see here, I'm a specialist in female troubles. i Denison: “That's why I've come to you, Doctor. The Lord knows I've | been having trouhle with "em! be underiaken. “I cannot seem to find my coat— he skimps | ceuts ia siamps for reply. Medical, | legal and marital advice cannot be given, nor can extended research| 4 turer of leather gloves in the United prexy | own pocket. The government fur- nishes and maintains a number of automobiles, pays certain employes of the White House, and maintains WELL-DRESSED CITIZEN of ihe vinite Houee, ana mainans| CRUSHED ON RAILROAD the president’s secretary and private [ Prosperous Looking Man With $164 sccretary, does all repair work on the White House. pays for lighting and heating, cleaning and repairing it; and allows the president $25,000 a year for traveling expenses. rke is 5 and Fare Struck and Killed By B. & M. Train Rellows Falls, Vt., Sept. 8 (P—An mar- What great country has no 'unidentificd man about 43 years old so as | Written constitution? Iwell dressed and supplied with sn.d" r his| A England is the only important [ang 4 railroad ticket to Albany civilized nation that has no Written | Y. was crushed 1o denth Weeonee: mos constitution. Asfew absolute mon-|jav by a Loston and Maine south tion | archies as Abyssinia, Siam and Nepal | hound train on the | Gonnaction have none, and there are principali- |rivor hridge, where he spncon Ules and natlve states' in ' varlous|yaq maiching conatruction ook he parts of the world that have none. 11\ " ¢ the jocal e o Q. as the govel o evel < Ak 59 e "flm“”vgm r'x)\‘l:w :;)l‘m“:v‘;‘;ym was found containing two suits of clothing, gold cuff links and other wearing apparel and a Rrooklyn, N. gl | Yoo address. Paolice o communi- cated with Rrook ithorities lead and zinc in the A. No Q. What is the lon of water? A. Approximately eight and one- United States? weight of a ¥n v R e 2| AUTO SPRINTER FINED §23 Q. Why can one ses doeper infe | Bristol Man Accused of Driving 43 | the water from a high altitude than | from a low altitude? | A The ability to see deeper into | water from a high altitude is com- monly explained by the fact that the Miles An Hour Past Line of Cars on Plainville Road. Ethelbert Micha ud, aged 45 of 37 | surface ripples and waves are lass in | NOUTh street. Bristol, was found QUESTIONS ANSWERED Elfande: =lar e ai oo & Dokl BUIEY OF [eohlens dilios and fied i ground is less eftective in diffusing | $2° and costs, by Judge Henry P. You can get an answ 1 to any Pb s bl e e et auestion of fact or information by i w| Officer W. P : 2 W is “Tn hoe signo vinces fficer W. P. Hayes testifled that \riting'ito, Sithe FQuestion LBAtOr. {fir, 15 e 2 | e followed Michaud's ear on West New Britain Herald. Washinglon| '\ {“ydar this standard thou shalt | Main street from Corbin - avenae Bureat. 1522 New York avenue.| oo vesterly and overtook it in Plain- Washington, D. C. encioslng two|™ '\ L. yici anv ather Catholie |Ville about 4:30 yesterdas afternoen churches exeept the Roman and |2{1°r it had passed 10 cars in one Greek? |spurt and several others a little la- There are in addition the olq |!°f: Michaud was driving at the All other questions| .tholic churches of eastern Chris- |Tate of 45 miles an hour, the officer | w1 recelve a perscnal reply. UD-|tondom. .the Abyssinian, | Coptie: |said.and traffic was heavy. tslsned requesta cannot be ln!ye{ed-‘g.«mmz ete. which date frofn the | Michand pleaded not guilty and i"“ letismafareiiconndentialegROltont lenriiexti duy i or MG iPie: fan| il anfisa Bt haratwasialiToy moving truck i Who was the first manufac-| TNUCH are very small and highly [in front of the cars he pased but ritualistic, the road was clear on the left and e States? T he thought he could pass in safety, Tt you must define a wellin- | [ The manuraciier ot leathes ELTON NOMINATED He doubted that he was driving at fornied man, you might say he is gloves in the United States is said o he rate of 45 miles an hour. one who knows the present status date back to the days of Sir William —_— Prosecuting Attorney Woods noll- of Muscle Shoals and why. | Johnson in New York state. In 1760 | Defeats ex-Mayor William B. Hotch. |} M case of Nathan Krayets, AT ! he induced several families of glove 5 aged 21, of 84 Talcott street, charg- Americanism: Earning more and | makers from Scotiand to settle on| KIS by Vote of 2450 to i35, Car- | °d with refusing to move when or- more money and spending it for [FEimes St i e g 3 dered to do sp by Officer John more gorgeous bath rooms. “And All I Did Was Hug a Little! [their patterns and the necessary rying Each of City’s Five Wards O'Keefe on Main street, corner of = U : v e o | Necdles and threads for glove mak-| Waterbury, Sept. T (P Ex-Mayor | CIUTCh street, about 10:15 Tuesday Still. most of the women who get “LADIES AND GENTLEMEN OF jn. Gloves continued to be made [John P. Elton defeated o) nizht i iloves ed ade | J 3 defeated ex-Ma K g mad ahout being called (hfl‘mrv'rmr; THE FUN SHOP MINSTRELS | in this locality and gradually the de- | William B. Hotehkiss by a vote The case of Mrs. Sehastiani G‘w. x are in the habit of getting mad | —B-E S-E-A-T-E-D” mand for them spread until in 1525 | 2450 to 735 for the republican may- | SNt of Beaver street, charged with about something anyway. | 1 " ‘they found a market in Albany and |cralty nomination in the local re- | SC°IVIng goods stolen by her son, | (As IT was i'nru]\r.'\r\q‘] a THK“W"' Boston. {Publican primarics held hero yester. | W28 continued until October 1 in > Y sl ing Minstrel Show I e naries held here yest igar e et anpyentl e o ,.?c Interiocntor: “And pray, Rastus, Q. Did the building of St. Peter's | 9aY. Mr. Eiton carried each of thr |@aezstegitisirohallonfdendrtent fo run for offlce you fust choese to " (/L Er Rt o e Nlied Cathedral at Rome, occupy 430 cons |fI'® Wards. The total vote cast was | e b x;mm affable and see how that plt¥ 99 vou In 3 secutive years? :)m heaviest ever cast in a repuo- Council on Religion v.orks. o 2 ican primary here 1 e 2k | Rastus: “Because man wife an'| A, Work on the building ex-|'3 PREAS Rere In Conference Today Another good coeducationall in- e fought all t'rough de war!" | tended over 430 years. but there ;o5 aiq Mr. Hotchkiss was magor | Binghamton, N. V.. Sept. § (P-e "titution is a used car “driven only | = = TicreflonselenieninE o Sto R o B0 T By *7" [ Members of the national council on ree thousand miles by an old man (And as The Fun Shop Minstrels tivity, 2 | The. democratic primaries have {Teligion in higher education are in vight here in the city.’ | Treated It)— { Q. Of what is brass an alloy?{not vet heen held hut it is accepted |S°SSion at Lisle. Addresses have been A i | TInterlocutor: “Why have you all; \Vas it used gencrally by the an- inat the present mayor, Francis: . by Precident Livingston Far- | | those American flags on your house, ¢! Guilfoile, will that party’s nom- of Cornell university; Dean ! | Tambo?” s the largest bank in jpee, E. Hawks of Columbia uni- i the United States? | = Srtee versity; Dr. Justin W, N ¢ 1 | | Tambo: “Celebratin' de Schen TN p . vi Dr. Justin ixon of the | LG i 4 T:o National Cits Pank of Giohtine of Hulk Renews ck Preshyterian church. Rech- 1 iy IS ils PP ! > fester Profescor Rebert . Calhoun 1 Réfus: “Ah didn't know yo' wuz! Q. How many one cent pieces Hope for Missing Crew ‘o yaie: proceeor av. 1. watenn of | marricd seben years.” {were eoined by the government in| Halifax, N Sept. § (PL—Sight- Teachers college, New York: Proi: I Tambo: “Yes sah, seven years 62 ing of a Handliner fisharman on the 'sor Henry Fowler of Lrown unior Wooden weddin'.” | A 175847000 St. Pierre bank Aug. 31. reported 'sity: Professor Howard Y. M 'lne’ « i Interlocutor: “Why. Tambo. seven Q. Are all the prople that ap- Wadnesday by fthe government 'of the Tniversity of Michigon hd In this world there is room for yearsisn't a wooden wedding. peared as Indians in “The Vanishing ' steamer Arras. has revived hopes | Professor A. (', Northrup of Vil vthing except a tall driver's * Tambo: “Well its disaway: on dat, American” real Indians® that the missing Lunenhurg schoon- knees in a cheap car. { day we had a fight an, &he wooden | A. Fxcept the star, Richard DIX. | cr Clavton Walfers with her crew of CLINTON CHIEF DU~ = {give in an’ Ah wooden give in" |21 those who appeared as Tndiansiqg men may have ridden out thel| Clinton, Mass. Sept. § (P~ (‘hict A brilliant kid 1s one Who suc- | Interlocutor: “Then neither one of |in the production were real Indians ' gizastrous storm of Aug, 24 {of Police Emil 0. Schwab, 53, dicd ceeds in school despite his mother's you did give in?" | from the Navajo Reservation. 160 | Tho Arras’ message explained that |last night at Clinton hospital, He conviction that everything is the | Tambo: “No; but Ah did give out. { miles north of Flagstaff. Arizona __|no attempt had been made fto:had been ill for a month. Chief teacher’s fault. ! Ah recommemibah dat night we got | Q. Are “intelligence™ and “KNOW- ligantiry the sighted vessel hecause |Schwah was horn in Clinton and | wedded. Dare wuz mah gal walkin' ledge” the same o . Ithe Arras had not been notified that |lived here all his life. He had heen It's a case of true love If he down de island toward de altar her | A. TIntelligence Is the quality. ex-14}, ()4vton Walters was missing, |connected with the police depart- keeps on feeling nunworthy of her hands full ob oranges.” [lercize lariprodiict tactive intellect b o e e e ror 14 ears, fa last fve =8 after discovering she is an awful | [nterlocutor: “You mean orange NPACHY to know or nnderstand:|oion e the Clayton Walters. chief, liar Blessoms | ability to exercise the higher mental — | Tambo: “No, sah! Dese blossoms | functions. ~Knowledge is the result It takes a shrewd lawyer to pick {had bloomed! Dey wnz soft oranges | OF product of knowing: that which . the only twelve men in the com- | it which she wuz goin' to hit me |8 known. ‘"_'f‘"'i’“"f""»‘ theratongi] TRAVEL ETIQUETTE munity Who think the woman inno- fin case Ah didn't promise ail dem (& natural endowment ~belonging || = o\ er vou are an experienced or Inesnerienced traveler, our Wash- cent, things de minister ask me.” '“n':fi or less to “‘: {1”"73;‘;“”‘ and | ingten Bureau's bulletin on THE ETIQUETTE OF TRAVEL will contain G 3 wite 118 the precursor of knowledge. suggestions and lielps that wiil he vaiuable you when on a trip of any - utol suppos i Pt hat &7 per cent ' Jnterlocuon: It\)ppo el Ie Q. Why is Panline T'zendnn, Hru:l kind. How to find out about train achedul ftare. ooni tions, baggage, etc.; Tt fs estimated that §7 per had a trousseau. heavyweizht boxer. known as the|]| Suggestions as to wardiobe, train courtesy. how to travel on a Pullman, eti- of the hig jobs are held by men| Tamho: "“No, she fus” had a slight e gk {] auetie of tha dining car. suggestions about children on trains; arriving, reg- o den't care a darn who is tennis ! cojd. We had our weddin’ supper in | oA istering and otinuette at a hotel: suggestions for travel by hoat or ehip— ‘(\_‘,‘}fm‘m:n % ‘0?": oty di! "m calty [,m,,,.y:]u A. Because he is a native of éhc§ are all covered in this bulletin. Fill out the coupon below and send for it: ——— Interlocutor: “Cafeterla, Terriers PASe country in the Pyranees|| = = = = = CLIF COUPON OFF RERW - — — = Correct this sentence: “Jones 18| ara dogs.” B | TRAVEL EDITOR. Washington Rurean, New Britain Herald, G s y hat is the meaning of the 1322 New York Avenus, Washington D. C his regular dentist,” said the gos- | Tambo: “Well dat's what we had LR i} r > i : 5 name Waldo T want a copy of the bulletin THE ETIQUETTE OF TRAVEL, and sip. “but he admits that others in | Hot dogs: Den fo' desertion we had | "% TREA™ o l encloss hercwith five cents In loose, uncancelled, U. §. postage stamps town are just as good. watahmillion. How dat bride did eat ., 70 . or coln for same Copyright. 1927, Publishers dat watahmillion! Do you know de | ToT oo, o oo oinmont pay anl NAME TP Syndicate watah from dat million got mixgd |, **10%% The & IR ke e A e x!v'v xnenses of running the White | el 4 onse? ears an' ebry time she shook her|'4*" ‘). norconal expenses of the | cITY . © STATE oo 01} I- | head pudding dropped out! Den We |, .cqunt for food. servants, and | | am a reader of the NEW BRITAIN HERALD, | servations had a party at de house et A s e e e = 0 T’I W tll ""“"’”””";“ I”";"‘(':” Bames, T by the president himself out of hi suppose. such as Pos ice i n e eather Tamho: “Yes, sah, but we cail it — Riackmail!” i | Interlocutor: *“Were there any | Conditinns: A secondary disturb- | ance central this morning over Ohio is causing showery weather in the | southern portion of the lLake region. Pleasant weather prevails this morn- {ing in nearly all other sections east of the Rocky mountains, The pres- sure continues high over the eastern and low over the western districts. | The temperature is somewhat lower in the northern portion of the Lake | region, but is still abeve normal in all the northern sections | Conditions faver for this vieinity | fair weather followed by increasing cloudiness. | Temperatures yesterday | High Low! { Atlanta Jare RISt 2 ! Atlantie Cit T8 L) TRoston e HonBhY 84 62 | Buffalo ‘ 76 62 ! Chicago Gentcns s B 70 | Cincinnati . et 65 Denver A0 60 | Dotro [ 1 Duluth ER Hatteras ShelieEe 72 Jacksontille ... s6 i | Kansas City 58 [ JiOR AMEEIER . niahvians 78 64 Miami Sircio o S = | Minneapolis ...... .. 16 66 Nanty e 64 w ~ 86 65| w <65 6 INEW 0TI LN 80 65 Norfolk e saeius B 68 Northficld S 4 a2 Pittehn Y 64 Portland. Me, ..... 50 56 | I'st. Toute ss 74 Washington ey 68 EXHAUST N FOUND Ogdenshinrgs oot 8 (UP)=— A carricr pigeon was picked up here flate vesterday, exhausted. hungry and thirsty On one leg the bird carried an | aluminum hand bearing pumbers, on the other a soft rubber band, numbered on hoth sides. It was believed the numbers were code. | recitations? Tambo: “Yes George Washington | THE WORLD AT ITS WORST—THE ENCLOSURE . - outen himself He reccipted ‘De Face on da Tea Room Floor.’ " Tnterlocutor: “You room." Tambo: “No, no: tea room.” Tnterlocutor: “Why. what kind of a face could be on a tea-room floor?’ Tambo: “Why. Interlocutor: “Mister Maloney. the diverced tenor. ®ill now sing ‘T Wonder Who's Cussing Her Now. " —F. R. Sawtrey A HISTORICAL EVENT | As Revealed by Telegrams (Jesse . Knowles. Telegraph Operator) t PRESIDENT COOLIDGE RLACK HILLS § D WE WOULD LIKE TO HAVE YOU GO UP WITH US Philander he force a reservation | i mean bar- de sur-face.! ADDRESSES , STAMPS SEALS ENVELOPE 1 PLANE AND LINDBERGH CHARL LINDBERGH ON TOUR USsSA T DO NO CTTOOSE TO FLY CALVIN COOLIDGE FLAP AIREADY STUCK. TRIES & TO OPEN ENVELOPE BY ROLL- Hi< Gonl Wilson: “So vou don’t care to live to a ripe old age?” Corman: “Nope! It T ever get around the golf links in three score and ten I'll be more than satisfied!™ —Nvydia R. Kittell MUCH GOOD IT DID HIM! By Hubert E. Lahoud The absent-minded prof took notes And then mislald and missed ‘em; The hoard of trustees purchased him A slick card-index system. The prexy called upon his soon: His face was wreathed smiles To see the absent-minded prof Leat briskly through the files. with SRR - i ING PENCIL UNDER FIAP . TAKES LETTER OUTOF ENVELOPE CANT REMEMBER WHAT HE AND TEARS ENVEWOPE UP AND FINDS HE TORS0T T0 ENCLOSE CHECK HASTILY TRIES TO UNSEAL ENVELOPE L l TEARS TIAP. DECIDES ANY- LABORIOUSLY PICKS AT STAMP WAY HE (AN SAVE THE STAMP FINALLY REMOVING IT INTACT 15 VERY MUCH UPSET. ADDRESS-| £S5 AND STAMPS NEW ENVELOPE PUTYING IN CHECK BUT FORGET- TING LETTER- DID WITH THE STAMP. RAN- SACKS DESK IN VAN