New Britain Herald Newspaper, November 22, 1926, Page 6

New Britain Herald HERALD PUBLISHING COMPANY Issued Dally (Sunday Excepted) At Herald Bldg., €7 Church BStrest. SUBSCRIPTION RATES $8.00 & Year. | $3.00 Three Months. | 76c. a Month. | Hntered at the Post Office at New Britain as Second Class Mail Matter. TELEPHONE CALLS Business Office 13 Editorial Rooms .... 926 The only profitable advertising mediwm Circulation books and press | open to advertizers. | the Associated Press. ees 1 exclusively en- | titled to the use for re-publication of all news credited to it or not otherwiee credited fn this paper and also local | news published therein. Member Audit Bureau of Circalation. | The A. B. C. fs a national organization | which furnishes newspapers and adver- | tisors with a strictly honest analysia of | circulation. Our circulation statistice | are based upon this audit. This fneures | protection against fraud in newspaper distribution Tiguies to both patlonal and | local advertisers. | The Herald fa on sale dally in N York at Hotaling’s Newsstand, Tim Square; Schultzs Newsttands, Entrauce | Grand Central, 42nd Street. | BRI FALSE ALARM BUGS It 18 clear that the city is infested | with a species of false alarm bugs | whose activities need rigorous curb- | ing, When it has come to a pass| where the fire department is called out upon will o' the wisp calls twice In one night it is time that| something radical be done about it. | Most of these calls are due to the | playtulness of boys who think they and “get away | FEvidently they are right, | judging by the manner in which they fail to get caught. When, as will happen sooner or later, one of | them is caught, an example should | be made of him, rather than treat- ing him merely to a little lecture of how to deport himself in public. Whenever the fire department is called out on a fake alarm it not only costs the city money but there is as great a danger of accident as it there were a fire. The narrow squeak at the Maln street crossing, where a fire truck ran through gats and stopped within a foot of a a moving train, placed at least five lives in jeopardy. Somewhere in the city a boy was in high glee at being the cause of calling out the fire de- partment, “all for fun;” but he would have had a seared consclence | for the remainder of his life had he found that his little prank caused the death or injury of five men. A NEW BRITISH EMPIRE Tt i scarcely too much to say that the British Empire has entered into a new epoch. Its dominions—upon which the sun never sets—by he- coming autonomous, species of independence previous condition of self-govern- ment which make them even less of a cohesive unit than the 48 Ameri- can states, now add a to their One wonders what should there be a some of the dominions lean one way and the anot interest—of a dominion rather than will happen great crisis and remainder her. Self- the empire—can dictate a policy op- posed to that in London. When the British Empire can no be absolutely certaln of acting as a unit in an international crisis the diplomats in London will thelr style. longer change It s hardly likely, however, th the emplre will fall apart. Austral and Canada may not London cn some points of policy now and then, but it isn't likel anything will be deemed impor cnough to warrant severing that binds. A agree with at t MILLION DOLL BACK T The New York, Hartford railroad least more candid be. The railroad this city that tt R PLAN— 1910. New Haven and nowadays is at than it recently advised used to antiquated old pile known as a railroad station would remain where it 1s, and the best that can be done it is to renovate it a bit. In the old days—in July, for 1910, for instance—the railroad was more specific, jollying us along into thinking it would spend a million dollars in this oty The plans ot new station, 1910 called one of the for a finest i Connecticut, on Jubilee stroet, the Main line. The Highland division of on the railroad—1. e, the branch Black Rock around the southern part of the city to the new ation. The tracks of the branch line in the ¥ were to be used for electric subur- bgn passenger freight, ete. A grand schene. F while it Is resurrccted, and occasion- ally hit upon by folk as a brand new 1dpa. Yet the reasons the New Haven | g4ve fqr the contemplated mprove- | )||L'nt_! in 1910 hold equal ddy, "The railfoad compa line—was to be run from service and factory ery once in a ly well to- ny New | dly Wwis quoted as realizing that Britain had grown more ray in size and fmportance than any other city in Gonnectiout during tha past a ness should be done on the main ! s ten years, and decided that its busi- | administrations, resulting in a not- ganda, line Instead of by a small branch. | It was belleved, so the rau-“ road was quoted, that the New Haven would get enough more busi- ness out of New Britain to Justify | Nraw the amount invested. But this con- | " tention was never put to the test. The station remained where it is. There will be some railroaders who will declare vehemently that | the improvements might have been| made 1t just about that time the| automoblles had not begun to dust | up the horizon, Maybe there fs much | truth in the contentlon, too; and if there is, the fact that New Britain has no main line station can be laid | to the devastating competition v)mj Conditions Are Not As Perhaps some censorious critics— they are found everywhere—ex- pected that there would be a consid- erable total of platitudinous folderol | uttered at such a gathering as the | New England conference set out to be. These hold that wherever the boost spirif prevails to the nth de- gree speakers will be bound to over. work themselves and overrate their logic. But it can scarcely be denied that out of the chaff the discerning and patient individual could obtain the automobiles offered to the rail- | road company. | A few years prior to 1910 it re- | quired “a lot of pressure” by the | city to induce the railroad to put the name “New Britain Junction” at | the Berlin depot and on time tables This finally was done, and happily | some ideas of a genuinely construct- 1t did not cost & million dollars. |ive type; ideas that might, it ap- That's why it happened. The new | plied, be of benefit to New England. statlon wasn't built because the| A goodly proportion of the popu- | plans would call for the expenditure lation do not take these New Eng- ot money. Yet if the million dollar | seriously as improvement had been carried out becs in 1910 the value today would be more than twice that much. land conferences as folk apparcntly do use | | they do not think New England is as bad off, all things considered, ns“ those who point with alarm would | OF | jave us believe. The report of the | committee some INOREASING COST FEDERAL GOVERNMENT | o000 50 0 ren Economy may be all right In its | yore gut the contentions of the opti- way; but despite all that Prosident | pqa rather than the walls of the | Coolidge and the other economists | pocmists—it showed there is room | can do the actual cost of running | gor ymprovement but on the whole the government departments 18| y4ated a story of fair industrial steadily Increasing. | progress. | The budget to be presented by the | President at the December session of When it is found that since 1920 twice as many plants opened in New England as went out of hile in the south for every hundred | plants opening up, 75 old plants | | went out of business—this would | This means that a continued rise | indicate we are not down and out. | during 1028 fn the cost of conduct- | | i ‘3\_ ; : e uring that time, too, New England ing the government is anticipated; ; Gl ained si making fu Sufl B0 for the BOurER wunmesstve | o Lo A% HBW (mallls making Ll X since the Congress is expected to show a sub- stantial increase over the total of $3,494,222,308 submitted at the opening- of the last session of Con- gress. business, fashioned hosiery lost while the lost two. New and south gained and England 29 new mills making seamless hosiery 1 R g none, ow point in post- ! five war expenditure was reached in gained The net debt has been reduced " h ained 30 during the Harding and Coolidge S GRMAL P In underwes New | England gained eight mills and lost | eight; the south gained 11 and lost | cost of 5 . 10, a net gain of only one. If this is r able saving of interest charges. But the net increase in the operating the federal government | he during the last three years will be i il © 0 qustry between New En the neighborhood of $450,000,000, | | the south, there {s nothing much | h is more than 12 per cent of : else to worry about. In shoes New the government's total expenditures | . | England still during the fiscal year 1924. B third of the nation’s supply. ve of the large expenditures of the post office department. During the period in which fed- eral expenditures were rapidly de- clining expenditures of depart- | mental units rapidly increased, and thelr rate of Increase has acealerated during recent years. The subtle facility of propa- | JUriNg the pas | history repeats itself; new sections, how | Hasil when cleared, settled and developed, relative condition of the textile nd and wh manufactures one- | These figures are exclu Somae speakers have given the im- pression, perhaps unwittingly, that New England is as poor as Turkey; | that she is the chronlcally sick sec- | tion of the United State to throw off this baseless imputa- . We arise ! tion. New England has not grown as fast as some been tions of the country t generatlon because which tries to show the government been,is {llustrated in no partieular | tively as in.the comparison 1 and state increases of ex- | | comes; but a slowing-up docs not { mean stoppage. economical naturally expand swittly—just like New England did after it was first settled. The slowing-up inevitably | penditure Thus it has been harped upon that 9to 1 deral expendi- | tures all told—including reductions | from New England “found ago. It cannot expect to be the bee- hive for the entire country, like some thoughtless enthusiasts would have it. It must produce and market its share, but the newer sections of the country, filled long | leclining debt—d 80 per cent, while | same period state expendi- | res fncreased over 150 per cent. devastatir the | S compari- ; | unfair. In 1919 | With energetic people, rich in re- sources and tasting industrial pros- | perity for the first time, are bound to make their presence felt. There was the talk about coachi New England to buy New England goods, the, exclusion of other £00ds, when possible. This vene: eainat most certainly; , doesn't h son is fed xpendi 1 and local expendi- tures had been chec es were at the v peak ¢ state ed as a resnlt of the war. From 1919 o states and local wunits of government o api " 1 to rapi inded their expenditures to o up in needed the public im- provements, while foderal goy. | 1468 1% & commercial wis 30 years standing, and there is no in suct, | likeliood of it gaining adherence extent 30 years from being passed, i to a greater now than it does at present. If only New Englanders bought New En land goods New England industry | would speedily starve. Tt by a super- Why do not th ton statesmen, quote gures and pe portant point they did, human effort such an idea were exe- cuted, and the from con other sections fol- The et lowed suit in conncction with their i own manufactures, New England's et P prosperity would be cut to the bone. W England sells too many c 1 fr loads of goods elsewhere to try to depend upon its own people for all trade, or to New Engla Al were mor times its 7 reprisals penditures of Dur as nst d goods from | the hardws in a year Ha other ions. re At bought in New England I 10 Local er times as gr American expenditures in and a half times as Of course, the federal go > question of New Owen D. Y ested er it is found, departmer England’s yet be to be hop s may economi Bu may not be all it is crack al Ger in DR. LEKSTON WELCOM Dr. Doman L D HOMI UBKaND kston was wel 1 a host of friends home, 60 Wint sion being his arrival months' trip to 1 spent his time at the Military hosptal, as well as i wing hospitals at Vienna st evening a linner rect, t his occ \fter a three Dr. 1 Cracow he kslon 1086 | S proceeding Tur Jaworek of H i M Dr. and this city Mrs and fonal ex It it | auestion of New England developing companies is i E. Shoer triends £ ’ yen of rom surrounding eitfes. “The Spirit of '26” England Has Taken Stock of Itself and Finds tured—Tooting Horns Rather Than Lamentations Are Needed, Reports At Recent Hartford Con- ference Clearly Indicate. | as much water power to develop a 'Iir meat cent Serious As Have Been Pic- its latent water power before other states or sections do 50, that is an- other matter. A candid appraisal would indicate New England at present is not in the lead; nor has it | the south, for instance. | There was the oratory about the | rm situation in New England. We don’t grow what we eat and import ances. Did any | food from long di speaker pause to point out that this| is the inevitable result of indus-| t indy lization? The very presence of | in large numbers in the nearby cities reduces the farm in- dustry. Farm ds find they can| earn more in the cities by being em- | . ployed in the factories; they prefer | to live in the cities anyhow, with| their opportu s for amusement and recr centers grow up close at hand u,,yi ion, and when industrial | their way there. The farmers at the only way they can com- | pete with the cities in galning hired hands is to pay city wages—and this they cannot do and at the same pay. Great industrialized time ma the farm in, the most country on the globe, is an example; | T it once was an agricultural country, | now doesn't raise enough food to| feed London. If somebody could de- | vise an economic system in which | industry would not in income and |d possibility for profit entirely over- lap the income from tilling the soil, the problem would be solved. But it | isn't being done. We will continue | to eat fruit from California, wheat ! in the form of bread from and m I e at from Chicago. The mor industrialized the west becomes the | more trouble the farmers there are having. ' go down. ‘ = o \ and | Getling down to facts and for ting fancy, the fruit, wheat s simply thrivi Britain writers hardware, Hartford Connecticut pr type- | and Jucts | generally. | New red mostly | in the En, past decades by mot | o keeping step in the development of | S certain grown to that New bor new industries which have | l vast It gland proportions during | time. is not the fault that it antomobile though it ca of a cannot har- the industry—al- make parts and ship them to Michigan; that it cannot be a part of the movir try picture indus- that it producer of |y, except as a cons the prime imer; cannot he clectrical goods seeing that the con- 1 over the country; that it I cern producing la cannot produce most of them has s in- 1he concern ne eeing that nation all the teley 1e struments i use, chief buyer is a k which co-operates with the widely- that it airplanes, spread electrical industry cannot produce ail the de ficld and the ance raw material has to come; considering the disf Wi g J it has not held its own in develop- ing the bus! be control phonograph t cause the actual it else- some of her own milk. m | cot : conscientious she tried to give whe has not developed a the radio business itto with add- ing ma ers and other contrivances. It will be seen that much success in industry depends altogether upon the originators of a contrivance and | where they happen to be located. | New England originated much in its day—it was the original textile pro- ducer, the original high class shoe producer, one of the ware producers, and sight typewriter pro the er, to tion some of our Tts did leading ing main trouble has been that not continue its originality new industries developed, a s been going on | and now we find these c And this other sections | elsewhere. while zan experimenting in some of our own lines, which wa What New t to do Is to to have been oxpected England could and o experiment in some which have been where, or to take up new they are developed. erence h n that t e t New | Er We | of the and’s horn rrived arc opinion t The re is plenty to toot | r about plan of Governor Trum- i lici world | 1 ¥ appropriation to tell tI what Connecticut ha som . ro. tis who years ag hid 1t the is z 1 the hushel it from out b | READ HERALD CLASSIFIED ADS Dear Miss Gordon; [ Why With god spirits bl this brush are set in ivos S\ Pre "hem ne'er to take th brush ndustry goes up and they | When ed on New | boy all nak: the smart the ba chains and gone, she took the ke th th standing in | 1rancisco, a bor fough 4 Send all communications to Fun | Shop Editor, care of the New | Britain Herald, and your letter will be forwarded to New York. How About It? The plum pudding proaches, but Folk: not a fun pudding crammed full of jokes, lazing on top of ason ap- it, too, We'd like to sit down to a piece, | wouldn't you? Proves Nothing Madam, the bristles of and when ¥, you know, X “Oh, don’t know. AD Bad, Bad 'he child who is his mamma’s hope, Yet fills the soup with shaving soap, burns the little pussy’s tail, or to jail! ake Falstaff. Will go to Con 5o The Pearl of Great Price ome low and loathsome creatures y careless maids for bed or bath without First pulling down the shades. st But well-bred, gallant Galahads Follow a code which binds a tiny peepJ Gentlemen prefer blinds! ~—M. A. Fisher Different Sally: “Men were braver wys of old Na in the Tadiesicol them off. —now they try to —T Tuccle m the s they take movies, all tall men are near- ighte The Naked Truth Little Annie was allowed to go nd visit her newly-born cousin » returned her mother ask- our baby cousin?" “Oh, mamma, immensel “And by the w rarie, or a girl?” ouldn’t tell, is it a mother, 1 saw it —7 Krieger. THE GREAT TEMPTATION (Overheard by “‘Rusty” Lippert) Andy Ames the amiable and wpable notary public and fertili csman of Squash Corners, took a teeth, sir,”” he sald, “you can talk i bout intelligence all you want, but lived cow st animal that ever as Jake Mitchell’s brindle Sapho learned easy. Jake taught how to let herself in and out of n rned to tie the round the other cows’ necks, it w pathetic thing to see 13 to fasten the chain at the her own n r try ack o “One day family was from under old t he e clack. nocked do it. Sh rug on the back per 1f into the house and wound On the way out n a flower pot and got a broom and opt up all the pieces, and when family came home she the barn door, d a large and held it out to her with it. ¥ cryin 1+ had pi ¢ woodpile and \ke 50 he could 1 “Jake made a mistake when 1ught Sappho to mi s by mistake, Tt was like of alo; first drink cide n't leave produce igh erow appetite. it she wore her- 1, at the early age \d four- share and isfy her own result was t nd dic ss that cider.” Pa: NOW YOU HUSH UP, OR \LL DROP You! THE DOCTOR SAYS \ HAVE TO TAKE REDUCING EXERCISES WIFEY! WHAT THE— ( M Hint (bashful): ‘What your father?" “Why?" Kent man is Muriel Kent the ¥ Muric use ened to n 1t do you care? Lever Loth. Free Itt proted 1.0 night that took a trip 1 admired the d it to me. will be weotle 1 1 much nd gave ot he iulgent husband and very \r it an i just‘ Yes. They used to weat | “Well, Annie, how did you like | h, | she | was | board off She | You my | to San e har- hoy Does usan Gordon No. The harbor at San Francisco is the Golden Gate. Look:up the ex- pression “glving the gate” in any dictionary of modern slang. s Dear Professor: I dreamed last night that I had to cross a narrow canyon between two precipices. I laid my best girl across for a bridge, and just as I was half way over, she collapsed |and I woke while I was falling. What does this signify? Maurice Phillips Dear Comrade: Get another girl. Under no cir- |cumstances marry the one you | dreamed of. She could not support | | you in the style you require. (Copyright, 1926, Reproduction | Torbidden) | | Q. What is a “coffee hug” and | |do they attack human beings? B Coffee bugs or cocids are any | |of several species of scale fnsccts | that live on coffec trees. They are {encountered in all parts of the |world, and spraying with insec cides or other means of eradication | are often necessary to save lhni | crop. Some years ago an experiment | was tricd in Ceylon of introducing | a red ant Into coffee plantations | |to destroy the cocids; but thsy at- tacked the workers who threatened | to leave the estates and that meth- od was quickly abandoned. Coffee | !bugs do not attack humans, | Q. What is the membership of the Daughters of the Amerlcan Revolution? A. In the Natfonal Society there |are approximately 151,000. Q. What is the record attendance | and non-profes- and how does | it compare with the largest at- tendance at a baseball game? | A. The largest audience at a pro- | fessional football game was 75,000 t the Los Angeles Coliseum for |the game between Red Grange's | Chi s and the Los Angeles sional foot League | tendance was 63,600 for the scconé game of the 1920 World Series at | Yankee Stadium, New York City | |The largest attendance for a col-| lege football game for the & asor | ‘OC 1925 of which we have any record was 85,500 at the Illinois-Ohio State game at Columbus, Ohio. | Q Whatis the population ot Honolulu, Hawaii? | The estimated population fot 1924 was 97,000. | | ""Q. What is “Short leat” pine and there does it grow? A species of pine tree that | nail out of his suspenders to pick |, v e Frcts 100 foct tall and | | has a diameter of about 2 feet. It| |is native in castern and southern| | states from New Jersey and Penn- Ivania to southern Tilinois, Arkan- | sns, and eastern Texas. It is valu- | Je for lumber and the wood is : ned, and strong. It principal use is for the | framework of buildings, weather- boarding, railway ties, cars and oth- er forms of building. It is less resin- ous the long-leaf pine, and| | ranks next to that species in fmpor- |tance in the south. 1R rom what book or play was th ving pleture “Red Lights” \dapted from the “The | ay for the speaking | by R What does “Waurenga” It n Indian word mean- “a good thing. Q. What rifle is best for range and accurac; Springficld, .30 calibre, n accurate shooting om 1,000 to 1,200 vards. |"'Q. What is the present name of | Petershurg, Russia? Leningrad, | Did British or American ships | the most American soldiers | is to France during the World War? * A. Of every hundred American soldiers who went to France, 49 went in British ships, 45 in Ameri- can ships, 8 in Itallan ships, 2 In French ships and one in Russian ships under English control. Q. Does the United States em- ploy hunters? A. Government hunters are em- ployed by the United States Biologi- cal Survey of the Department of Agriculture in Wyoming, Colorado, Texas, New Mexico, Arizona, Utah, California, Nevada, Idaho, Oregon, ‘Washington, South Dakota and Mon- tana. No specified age limit is set, but men of mature judgment are employed. The pay ranges from $90 to $150 per month, depending on the ability of the man and the amount of equipment he furnishes. Q. Can a graduate of the United States Naval Academy refuse to ac- cept a commission after graduatfon? A. Earl Blair Zirkle of Kansas refused to accept a commission after graduating from the Academy. the vy and if he had persisted in his refusal he would have been sent to sca for two years as a Mid- | shipman. Q. What been shown in the mov first time this year? A. “The Torrent” dirccted by Monte Bel fare Nostrum” direct- ed by Rex Ingram and *““The Temp- tress” directed by Mauritz Stiller. Q. Where and what was the or- iginal Crystal Palace? A. It was a vast structure of glass and fron designed by Sir Jo- seph Paxton and erected in Hyde Park, London for the World's Fair of 1851, It was removed to Syden- stories of Ibanez have s for the !ham, 8 miles from London, in 1854 and became a place of popular en- tertainment. In 1911, it was pur- chased by the Earl of Plymouth to be held in trust for the British Natfon. The Imperial War Museum was opened there in 1920, Q. Who wrote “The Street Forgotten Men A. The story was written es- pecially for the screen by George Kibhe Turner. Factsand Fancies BY ROBERT QUILLEN Among savages the women usually boss. Isn't civilization wonderful? The proper study of man is his opinion of a “slick" lawyer. You can determine any woman's social stratum if you know where she bought her beads. Very few can stand prosperity if it'’s the other fellow’s. indicate or gum Alas! A firm jaw may either strong character chewing. Zero in entertainment: Visiting people your wife once knew. Even if all men really were born cqual, some would get lazy and crooked. Undevoloped peoples: Those not — COLUMBUS T He| | was not permitted to withdraw from of | yet exposed to the vices and discases. In the last five thousand years, man has invented new ways to do almost everything except .go to the dogs. ‘The safest thing for pacifists is to begin now and organize a new re- ligion that forbids its followers to fight. Severe weather is that in which ou see only seven men watching a |sign painter. Old-time doctors wrote books about sex, but they didn't call their work literature. You can’t blame a truck for fits manners. It contains more pig iron than an automobile. The race won't be drowned agaln. It will just fall dead when a Su- preme Court declares gome tax une | constitution&l, Every community has at least one man who isn't good for anything ex- cept to sce the other fellow's duty, Nearly all kids have a chance to become hardy except those raised |with thermometers in their mouths. And many a poor kid gets licked |because his dad hasn't sense enough ;(0 “help” intelligently with an arith- |metic lesson. | Correct this sentence: “I could !make more money as a stenograph- ler,” said she, “but I'd rather cook.” (Protected by Publishers' Syndicate)’ Observation On The Weather ‘Washington, Nov. 22—Foreca: for Southern New England: Most- |1y cloudy tonight and Tuesday | warmer in Connecticut tanigh | fresh west and southwest winds. Forecast for Eastern New Yor! Mostly cloudy tenight and Tuesday with snow flurrice in extreme north | portion. Warmer tonight in ex- treme south portion; colder Tues- day in north portion; fresh, possibly strong southwest and west winds, | Conaition Areas of high pres< | surc overlies the plains states, the southern states and the Atlantic | states. Dressure is low over On- | tario and the upper lake region, | also the Pacific coast states. Light | snows occurred yesterday in the lake region and the St. Lawrence | valley. It is ‘raining this morning | at Galveston, Texas and New Or- |leans. Relatively low temperatures prevail for the season of the year {in the Ohlo valley and southwest- | ward to Oklahoma. | Conditions favor for this vicinity | fair weather with slightly higher | temperature, PISO’S for COWL: ghs '0 COOLIDGE! Here's that Outline of American History you have been walting for— a Lulletin prepared by our Washington of type. giving every “high spot” in of this continent down to the present Bureau, condensed into 3,500 words American history from the discovery day. It's “different”—it will glve you a bird’s evo view of tho development of America from the timo of its dls- covery that you can get in condensed form nowhers else, glrls and grownups will find it equally anceators came over on the Mayflower Bchool bovs and interesting and valuable—whether their or on the latest steamer from Europe! Flll out the coupon below and send for ft: == == o= CLIP COUPON HERB ! AMERICAN HISTORY EDITOR, Washington Bureau, New Britain Herald, 1322 Now York Avenue, Washington, D. C. I want a copy of the bullettn COLUMBUS TO COOLIDGE, and encloss herewith five cents in loose, uncancelled, U. 8, postage stamps, or coln | tor same: | NaMB ADDRESS cITY I am & reader of the HERALD, ..BTATE 3HES WIPING DISHES AND TELLS WIFE TO 6O IN AND REST, HE'LL PUT THEM AWAY STh HE PANTRY. REPORTS NO DAMAGE EXCEPT SMALL. HIS NIZK IN SUGAR BOWL PLATTER AT BACK TELL OVER, Co ht, SURING HER T'5 ALLRIGHT THEY '60° KEEP PLATTERS STAND- ING UP THAT WAY RIS TOR PANTRY 45 KNOWS JUST WHERE WHERE HEPUTS OITHER, CANT FIND WHERE IT COMES A CRASH FROM PICKS UP SILVER WARE MUTTERING [T WASN'T FAULT, IT'S SILLY TO SPOONS, KNIFE TO WASH OVER 1926, by TEN MINUTES LATER RE- TURNS FROM PANTRY TO ASK DOES IT MATIER LADLE, DROPPING THREE TORKS WHICH WIFE HAS ALITTLE LATER ASKS WOULD SHE MIND OPENING PANTRY DOOR TOR HIM, HE'S AFRAD T SET THESE THINGS DOWN CREAM- SEEMTO BELONGS TFINISHES AT LAST. WIFE SPENDS NEXT ANDTWO DAY TRYING TO FIND WHERE HE PUT THINGS AGPIN SRS WIL'J:fl Y e