New Britain Herald Newspaper, November 7, 1925, Page 6

New Britain Herald HERALD PUBLISHING COMPANY A Dafly (Sunday Excepted) ald Bldg, 61 Church Btrect SUBSCRIPTION RATES $5.00 & Year, 2,00 Th s At H res Mont 160, & Mor At Office at N Class Malfl ed at the F ar Eec TELEPHONE CAL ness Office 1a) Rooms Mewmber of the Associated Press o Asto titled to all news credited d Prese ta exclusively ure for re-publication ed to it or not other also e Member Audit Bureau of Circulation. The A, B, C. a & na ch furnishes newspaper a analysis of or th s atriotly our o w Ate based upo protection aga distribut gures to ocal adyertisers, ald H Schult Grand Central, faoon snle dally CRACK OF DOOM I'OR CHAPMAN Gerald deral ad asen- d that The Chapman seems to in- score he At tervention on the tence to serve | anta governi o mete first. We arc opinion last chance Chapman stands convicted of two York mail 1t rohhe murder, trinl until he t Atlanta nothing The t it ford hapman wis the fime. b- Ha: end of C vere in it would nie "I'he ore by el to him, an ti al question brought to the the intention of Chapman's oun. force the government to him serve he ems claim thus making nta senten before is in Connecticut, to ecedented considering by counsel | Ing to the disaster intil later, to sacrifice years Is better luxu few years rather than deny iren the Inherltance of frec proferred city, The e that education so abundantly the state or trou with schools in Amerlca is nothing and too frequently, it is sad to relate, is not valued ighly enough. It should ambition of every 10 'EDERAL WHITYH METHODS In the W WASH en the tewashing Larns and fer much more common than § lays of more durable point 1 kno was one gover experts and it under generlc terms nment most t hear- departmental ssional investigations, other i ed by ¢ Some ctie perform deral offic! times it 1s not ths general rnmental desire and pecial hrand of governmental hlack ide The latest application of govern- white was glven the public view when Captain McVey of M: Engineer Mullen of the same craft were found not guilty of contribut- to u any whitewash, for such cases a paint is proy ment h the steamer which cost more an 60 lives near Newport summer It appears from the deliberat of the federal steamboat nspection that the chief engineer was per thing about the any- t ap- pears that the assistant engincer to the whitewas) any reported the condition chicf engineer, ich semblance of blame from the assist- ant. The 114 chief engincer, however, not report the situation to the captain, True, the boat earlier in the was delayed several hours while but the cap- tain apparently did not know the He impatiently 1 hoat day the boiler was patched up; what caused probably merely pac ind or 1o pro engincer FEALY'S CAPACTTY TO PAY | kinac and Assistant | ions | NEW BR prosperous and | unemploym lcally Many 1 United State ve re nt pra wlion unkno th 1 to thel inmigrants turn natiy Ttali; Amedei sult, so that t) mn immigrant I'he on! term of years, will refle laly's prosperity and improve ) he credi n more in future ar | IF'REE ADVERTISING FOR MOVIE STARS movie stars simply conld not prosper without a certain amount ot free advertising; and are it ki a bit spectacular in they villing to © for the merely by bein thelr personal lives, If necessary. There was the case of Glovia returned | lushand, marquls n posseesion of a name as long as the Swanson, who has just from Europe with her al alphabet, Miss Swan- | | son spoke about | great length, | the Associated marquis at relfall her | and our old Press, carvied | remarks Into thousands | papers. The gist of the version of the the would of news Im star's | marrlage was that she took marquis purely for love, and have | even maa Al of enough married him e not been a which was remarkahle to de | graphing, busied the ing that ) extensive tele- The 1f marqguis hin reporters s {1 ,» and that hy was the art e didn't tell it to Gloria to impres of TRudolph typical of got emphaslz- | gennine | cle merely s her. The case Valentino | also is the nf\ preferred universal in- \ is en route ‘ from Los Angeles to Lurope, to enjoy a vacation. But | Winifred Hudnut, is en route Europe to Los Angeles, ability movie stars to in the | formation posi tion journals Rudolph merely his wife, from presumably to go to work, in New York | dolph The couple will be | but Ru- assured the breathless world for a week, that they will not mect while in city. You sce, they had agreed 1t ) F: and k to the cach communic tated with one period. Ru- 2lorious t hing marquis, | * | don't | ver! | he ITAIN DAILY HERALD, " Facts andFanaes l BY ROBERT uLILI N ossings, A slow jud, Reform ting federal of gets Lehind, Procoss farther numhers, unl in Dill - jsn't lots, b-dollnr 1and loesn't dors, why pounds? 1t conl ire 1,864 melt docs o o ton weigh licfore ¢ sanity, amine admitting a not. let thc jury? . uienist of in- e to do to the “en- intcrest” that guides in watermelon would suffer. were addicted Know Ihe chief objection to balloon ers s that they always inadequately inflated. Pavement: That hard, stuff a town puts down just a plumber will wish to dig trous wher a hole. Every town has at least one man | He who is useful because not to trust anybody he you know approves. She isn’t maid un for running really i other a hopeless old velops A mania people's affairs. The wild conntries, ass but even take i8 hunted in Americ way his license drive, Nothing magazine sing is certain, exeept that a full of questionable ad- will contain questionable stor Vanity {s what gets a look knickers. a man has h([(\rn at hie skinny legs in the | seem | amooth | | And people eought ri in some | they | 1o ! | Nor pald the least attention to SATURDAY exit facliities arc u Maxson ; — } Send all communications to Fun | Shop Editor, care 0f the New Britain Herald, and your letter | will be forwarded to New York. | Anything to bo fn Style, Folks! 1t fashion required a pleasant smile To keep us in the latest tyle We reckon we'd use care the folks About kind of faces we wear! | The Reason “8o you Jilted Gene! the poor boy “Poor boy s right! 1 didn’t marry him.” —Alfred Freediing, Tris Well, | I feel sorry Marion Ihat's why He Who Laughs Last By Paul Cook sall” worked upon the ark neighbors gathered ‘round mocked him for his foolish plan build on the ground i which hie hoped to sall | Upon the waters wild; Aud many laughed aloud at him, While others mercly smiled. When The And To \ there “Poor nut,” they vou think You'll need a ¢ But Noah answered not a word, Though had an answer pat. and his sons just kept at work And finished up the job, said, "what makes aft Uke that?" ‘The heckling of the mob. And then the rain I'rom out the sullen s began to fail 15 fuge in vain, | With terror-stricken cries. But o'er that waste of waters rode | The ark, serene and slow, And on the deck Pa Noah sang, | | | The difference between a sensible “ merger and a wicked trust is about | 20 years of clapsed time. u bont lien our government ood Amcricans is one the vice distinet in one members have their own method insulting air It is nation stirs strife be- up at's strife nations, t up pernicious stirs with is i said the better trock, per it looks 125 VYears Ago Today . BRIDGEPORT WANTS < 10 GOVERN ITSELF Action Against lnjunclion Hold- ing Up Paving Job in sidewalk strect Carlisle Indians, at the C; s of Glad Lawton and regular used 1sino nigh 0D he oth L the polo n enclosed spac reports he (TR of onor initia- hundredth member affair took place John Kelly and representing Valjant ulated the hall hal O Day member of 1te il Observation 0n T/Ie u ah‘xer For “rnoon or England- nereasing rain; colder Bunday think. | statesman- | | on “It ain't gonna Boys! First clerk: “Notice boss got all at once? Second clerk: “Yes, he draft from the hank.” -R ose jnst a Boros, will oats are in an-| More sown tomobiles than on the ground! & “1 Miss ‘l\ Swiss” sad World! A know passed by a Laker shop which came the lizing odors of cooking pastry. pped and inhaled deeply, | his little tummy, licked his en maly; “If smell!” | Bruce This small boy Sad, 1 from vy hat Hazel only Pride and Prejudice (\ Fun shop Movie) Dim lieht the way things off, Time not heading.) 11la pretiy making ti now. &0 far navs rty-five n “Wot BOt marrie dollars live as cheap | | his is Reel 2 § terior Iding stg are gath wwn, chattine.) e gentleman just: two sweet \rming a bridegroom! nd - gentleman g notice his mother gave him away? I t 1 relisved, Th » hard time get ne of 8 g when ought do ing she say she him 7% Place, of a “T nee Ella itively it g0 out look in years, a fellows th for cat the de¢ it do, et want me go get to be a They need the new li- forewoman ob if Ipmtac to you. rier down at the old neat your that houst 4 to say e Nobody ipport ing isband Information. Please! Who is *phone: It wh Hello! Who is this this!"” o you Strange Anatomy “What's worrying J the | football coach? “How | | tinued to stai mote firhen { dawned again | short, | on | open. I they have run the | ha. | some picture of { The s how cool the | word | block and stroke and bore gushing got | from the lips as Mr. Walker ga !the street | polic | mobite, NOVEMBER 7, 1925. —THE 0B SERVER— Makes Random Observations On the City oy hu do you think of the Erotic| Eight?" The sartorfally correct automobile | salesman to whom M question was addressed ga Iy, For & moment or two he con- as if the query, like o little auger, were through the calcercous matter which protects his brain from the sun. the light What did you say?” Slightly annoyed Mr, peated his words. yes, the Erotic Eight," salesman replied, “Well, I'll tell you. They don't sell well {n this| territory. People are a littie afrad | of them. —they don’t he asked. Walker re- the make thelr own par! you understand, And besides xxx. Tor five minutes Mr. Walker lis- tened while the salesman hacked and hewed at the Erotic Eight upon which the prospect 1 set his heart. It's wrist pin don't stand up, he learned. The piston rings leaked carly and often, The crank shaft was light and was not correctly lanced which, he was ssured, caused unendurable vibration and that, in turn, brought on headache and dizziness, pleursey, lumbago, curvature of the spine, fcose veins and the {lls to which the human system s susceptible. “But I know a man who x x Mr, Walker started to interject, His interruption was bitten off The salesman was hitting all cylinders with the cut-out “Yos, he two,” he there imed one or Jut wait until car a year, Ha, able to sell it YO8, may I They won't be for junk. Now, take this car here, this beautlful Sylvan Bix x x x.” But Mr. Walker didn't take it He fled, his mind filled with a grew- biological horror csman was still talklng, such as torque, tested on the uned and, with relief, saw a eman not far away. An Innocent on Automobile Row, Mr, Walker pursued my ap- pointed task of choosing an auto- He had promised his wife a wedd anniversary For several hours he car for ent, listened to more language than he | numb, { clusion that there was not a | vanish and his r mar- | end ! | | is a Clara | parts | P you | existed. His brain was He almost reached the con- de- | thought pendable automobile made. At each salesroom he diffidently | mentioned a make other than sold { there, S Immediately he w orned. belittied, browbeaten and sneered at. He was accused of having everythini in the line of mer instability from dementia praccox to criminal d insurable insanity, which certain to descend to his children wnd his children’s children. When he started out on sion e felt reasonably himself. His fountain pen filled with ink good for signing dotted line and tracing his s on He didn't doul would he invited out to din of the Totels by who wished to in- gratiate himself into his favor, As he proceeded his self este T an to evatorate, his confiden anhood to dw into insignificance The farther he went the more he becarae convinced that he was a boob and an imbectle, hereft of all perspicacity, lacking In perspicuity, about important in was mis- of s corta on nature a cheek one hiest ner at some esman e > 10 “One knae of his bacl vesterday George Levis, the wag tryir meaning of the word, a room full of boys, “Now,” she sald, “suppose not present tos in the room. Wha u s “Ionest, hock-headed to tell you guys say you (Copyright Teacher g to impress “ahsent” on on S0 )um]~ vy 1 was?" up a hate thest would ¥ teacher, voungster, “I' at ot 192 Forbidden) spoke somc eproduction Walker's | zed blank- | boring its way | intelligence | They're an assembled car | was | dle | S lintends to enlarge 1 was | and Its People this man's world as a glass of water |tn an all night club. | The culminating humiliation curred when he ventured into one of those gilded palaces which cater [to the desires of people who sim- ply must have everything they own imported, Inside the door he threw out his chest, determined to make an impression, Several young men were ling about the showroom in attitudes of indifference. Two of them glanced at him it he were a curiosity, looked at each other smiled and continued their con- versation, Tor ral minutes he was fgnored. He am a red blooded American eitizen and knows his rights. o after a reasonable wait during which no one scemed (o recognize his existence, id, In a voice as loud as he rmml master: Say, you pinheads. I came In here to buy an automobile, 1f you will stop discussing chickens long enough to walt on me maybe you can make a sale."” This had the effect of halting the cdialogue between the two young men who had condescended to notice his appearance on the scenc, Doth {looked pained and in doubt as to what course of action, Then on spoke up, saylng to the other ¥ ¥, the gentleman seemed to be annoyed about something. Won't you step over and speak to him. And Perey, do be gentle, You know the heat sometimes afieets elderly peo- ple and perhaps that's what's the matter with him Perey glided side, lisping: oc- stan to Mr, Walker's “Do you want some- thing, Sir? Are you sure you're in the right place? Woolworth's s a block farther down, you know." f I want something” Mr. Walker roared. “I want you to come up to my gym and put on the gloves with me, or {f that's too far, maybe we can find an alley handy where can go at it with bare knuckle #s, 1 want something. I want you to know I am not an clderly person. The heat hasn't af- feeted me. T want to buy an tuto- mobile, but T don't think you know what an automobile s ' bid you good day.” Slamming the door as he went out, Mr, Walker rushed off to a restaurant and drank a quart of butter milk, meditating, the while, on what a funny world this is. That evening at dinner his wife, noticing the wrinkles around hls Lrow, inquired gently: “Is some- thing worrying you dear? Did you select an antomobile? To which Mr. Walker replied: “There is no such a thing as a good automoblle. Ask the salesmen. And you're going to continue to ride in taxi cabs.” Maybe there's a moral to this tale. ! Maybe there isn't. Anyone whose knowledge of automobiles and who has sfarted out to buy one | will tell whether there is or not. we When the the Children's Home, as proposed hy { Rey, . Klingberg, 1s com- plete, a room will be set aside fin which the portraits of benefactors ill grace the walls, Dr. Klingberg s always made ap effort to sccure the portraft of any person who has | contributed to the institution in such a manner that it might carry |on its building program and fn the | majority of cases he has been suc- As a result the gallery of enefactors will be one of the most interesting sights at the home, Dr. Klingberg expects to recefve |the bequest from the estate Spencer Douglas in a few months With this money, which will amount ito between $40,000 and $50,000, the funds out his ide No. doubt Tie will have the | cooperation of others when he de- | cides to complcte his plans as New | Britain has always supported him in | his philanthropic ventures, | institution il not per- to the | although these mit him to et est, Have That Todine | system vou had your lodine today? is not a facetious question, is ssary in the human absence from the thy- be the cause of nec may | poitre, | At the States Public United vice, the of ti Health request ° and | is slight | layout of bulldings at | of J.| he | Connecticut state department of health s making a thyrold survey among children, A bulletin explain- ing the object of the survey states that “Interest in the thyrold gland has been intensifed during recent years by the discovery that thyrold enlargement, gometimes called en- demic goltre when it occurs in ex- cessive degree, may he prevented by small amounts of lodine, It would seem that the thyrold requires a minute quantity of fodine in order to perform its function and when 1not enough fodine is present the gland enlarges, possibly for the same reason that the musecle of one's arm enlarges when greater demands are made upon {t.” The castern part of the United States 1z remarkably free from en- largement of the thyrold gland. This is probably due to the fact that there is a small quantity of tlodine in the water we drink. Ene demie goltre js rare in Connecticut a5 most cities are well supplied with | But in the [ pure drinking water, | middie west, especially around the Great Lakes, and in some parts of the far west, a majority of children have enlargement of the thyrold gland to some degree, Score an- {other mark for Connectlcut, In carrying out the survey a rep- resentative group of 500 to 1,006 | children will be selected in each comunity for examination. These will be taken from the seventh and cighth grades in the schools, The examiners will also look for infec- tions of the tecth, tonsils and adenoids. “The purpse state deps “is prin of the survey” the rtment of health explains, rily to ascertain the per- centage of thyrold enlargement of different degrees. Incldentally the information concerning infection of the teeth, tonsils or adenolds will permit a study of thyrold enlarge- ment in relation to such local infec- tion. By such a study f{t is de- sired to obtaln information as to whether or not focal infections may be one of the factors causing en- larged thyrold. "It is expected that the survey will continue for some time, The {cards upon which records are made will be sent to the offics of the United States Public Health Service for tabulation. It is expected that a report of the survey will he pub- lished in the Public Health Re- ports Desiring to ascertain the reaction fo the paving of Myrtle street, the | Observer questioned a representa- [tive number of citizens on the sube lject, propounding to each of them the following questions: “Do you innpr\)\e of the municipal paving of Myrtle street?” The answers are appended: | M. Llewellyn Taxpayer, |less, why speak further?” XKent B. Brainy, “Municipal pav- {Ing? T thought they used cement.” Howe I. Bump, “Not so good, but I'd lay down my life if the city pav- (ed my own street. I expect it will canse my death, anyway.” Mrs. J. Walker, “The autos will go faster now and 1 can't stand In the |street to gossip.” . Contractor, “No, anything further, “If it cost And if you I'll add, Wil it raise the or the anny Flapper, cost of chocolate sundaes I neight of wkirts?” Major Ity, “I should worry, What's it to me I" Paul ¥. Ticlan, “It {s undoubtedly lanother effort of a few oftictals to | grab all the coin for themselves, Being out of office at present, I heartily disapprove.” Warner Tchew Gumm, “Will they hang Chapman?” 1. C. Red, “Fine, It's government |ownership, just like we have in | Russia. Mortimer Trundeldinger morton, “Indubltably it will pro- {duce a salutary efiect, nevartheless |the principle of private enterprise 18 |endangered. However, 1f the fidu- clary exemplar s to be contrasted— (This was all awfully elevating, dear readers, but we can't put out 42 vages every night.) Tona Carr, “It rides great.” Ware Sloppyclose Plusfours, “Myr tle street? What's her phone num- ber?2** So it's Throck- all decided. FARM BUREAU ANNUAL Wallingford, Nov. 7 (#—The an- nual meeting of the New Haven county farm bureau will be held in Wallingford, Saturday, December 5, {1t is announced. ‘The Minute That Seems A Year. gy GLUYAS WILLIAMS [} lfi*: L‘Ll\ DEMON HWATE THREE © EN) LE WIPING YOUR VE H[M. CHINA TEA-POT, N THE SIXTEENTH ER ¢ BEST PINK CUR HUSBAND FIZED WITH THE DESIRE TO EXACTLY HOW HE MADE © McClure Newspaper Syndicate THAT IBIRDIE THIS AFTERNOON