New Britain Herald Newspaper, May 28, 1918, Page 5

———— et e e e e, DE TALK BY RUTER CAMERON Why Stories Fall Fiat a neighbor he other , A story told by Yo a group of wus, fell very nearly flat. There was only one person in the group who had that exceedingly rare gift—the ability to laugh when one i3 not really amused. The rest of us gave those queer cackles or chuckles, gr whatever you call them, which are the average person's sickly substitute for laughter on such occasions. My neighbor was surprised. Later, e told me that he could not see why that story hadn't taken. ‘T thought « awfully funny when I heard . tell it” he said But Fle Wouldn't Have Wanted to Hear, So 4id 1. And if I hadn't known that he wonldn't care to hear, I could have told him why it wasn't funny when he told it. It is Mr. C's own pet story and he knows just how to tell He leads up to the point with just enough de- | just enough delineation of char- er, to give it reality without etgiting it down. My neighbor is also a good story teller, but that was not one of his own stories and he hadn't gotten the hang of it He over weighted the first part with detall, too muoh character delineation, thus over halanced the story s had his hearers expecting much | o¢ vour denouement than he ha fun of to give them I N < are a few It Takes As Much Knack to Tell a| qwonit make you a Story, As to Write One. e ol lalibook Won ' To tell a story well requires quite | ..,u1q make vou a good actor, as much knack (though of a different 11l help vou fo. see why sort) as to write one. Comparatively | _...i.. {1 hetter than others few people are born with, or acquire, this knack. Baqually few can Tre per suaded that they do not possess it ; Fven without this knack, however. of mine | tell a evening, one may storv passadly if one will avoid certain pitfalls Don't tell tori that much explanation involved in them, has to T a mind to grasp the explanation one is going to make that zet a funny story surely fall flat. For instance, I | a man who had a very amusing dote about a game of pinochle, he was always trying to tell people who didn't understand game of pinochle and by had finished his explanations of game, he had killed his story Tniversal Truth is that the More { to the truth, tant point (““Was it Monday, Tuesday?”) Don't tell a story in humor lies wholly whiish they doesn't did, to an know the to what | which volved. story only when you re of a onrself, suggestions zood story well | require so of circumstances listener considerable effort effort to and vour story will knew anec- it to | the tims he the interest in Important Than Actual Truth in Story Telling. Don’t feel obliged to stick too close Don't stop to debate some unimpor- or was it in the relation of the character of the persons involved audience persons in- | Don't tel stories of which the point j= vour triumph over someone else. | You should be the central character make They teller, acting some bilious. of No but the the A TRIAL BOTTLE C. TO DR. W. B. CALDW S ——————————— R PR the 1-A MEN CANNOT Boston, May the selective service heen placed in Class boards cannot enli ice, the war department by Major cott, in charge of the draft in Mas: chusetts. law who 1-A by for naval BOY ACCUSED OF Joseph Wa THEFT. but home was entered and 36 was A boy who was arrested confe taking §$1. | for the land the balance for ice cream NEW PERFECT] ON “The U.S. Fuel Administration au- thorizes us to say that it considers the use of oil cook stoves and oil heaters at this time a very important help in the necessary conservation of coal for ~_war purposes.”” Save Coal for the Nation’s Needs If you use a New Perfection Oil Cook Stove _you can give coal to the nation—and gain gas-stove comfort. But the New Perfection is the only oil cook stove that gives real gas-stove comfort with kerosene. Its Long Blue Chimney alone insures clean, intense, instantaneous heat (free from soot and odor) for every cooking need. 3,000,000 now in use. Made in 1, 2, 3 and 4-burner sizes, with or without cabinet top. Also 4-burner stove with cabinet and heat- retaining oven complete. S0-CO-NY Kerosene and the New Perfection mean clean, ‘econom- ical, ready heat—freedom from coal hods and ash pans. °Uue S0-CO-NY Kerosene—economical, convenient. STANDARD OIL COMPANY OF NEW YORK Ask your dealer about the New Perfection Kerosene Water Heaters and regular New Perfection ovens— none better. HEN your head ly find that you are constipated and To correct constipation and clear the system of the fermentiny congestion of stomach waste, foul pases and hile, use DR. CALDWELL'S SYRUPSPERSHN Ghe Perfect Drug Stores Everywhere RE, OBTAINED, FREE, OF CHARGE, BY WRITING 457 WASHINGTON ST., MONTICELLO, TLLINOIS JOIN NAVY. 28—Registrants under = have local serv- under instructions received from Wol- | kowitz, of Willow street, informed the police yesterday that his stolen ed to | of which he spent 40 cents hire of a bicyele from a dealer To Relieve Sick Headache —Remove the Cause! aches you will usual- Laxative <1.cs —50 cts. $1.00 HANCOCK IN SERVICE., Bassett Street. Man e Enters Aviation Corps Overseas Duty. Horace G Mrs Hancock Mr. Daniel N. Hancock of 140 Bas eet, left this morning for Dal- las, Te where he is under orders | to report for active duty at the U. S. {army aviation camp. Mr. will make the trip by way where he will stop for | credentials. He the examinations . son of ind of Boston ernment. successfully passed and enlisted in the corps several months ago, but recelve his call until last He has entered the active 1g branch of the service and is to train for a fighting pilot Mr. Hancock has been for a number of years as the North & Judd Mfx year ago waived po {{hat the factory might h | nis exemption from army He is one of the most active members of Centennial lodge A. F. & A. M., and is 2 member of the Kenilwerth club. Iis brother, Luther Hancock, is with the a tationed at A southern eamp his g aviation did not i rH‘PI'\\ar‘ | for ible ve made service any VENDETITA SUSPECTED. Brideeport Rlv(dnr-:l: Man Shot Down in Street. Guiseppi Spat ess man, lies in Vinecent® hespital and 2 o, for- keeper here, iz technical charge of breach as a resuit of a hold-1 ttafola's home, Spattafola ast. The definite evi he is held merly Leld of the peace | Sunday night 27 Union Square, was shot through police say there is dence against Rus but pending the result of the coroner's investigation now in progress. Spatta- fola persistently refuses to make any statement. He had on near in wh the no at the time worth touched his person and $5,000 and none of this w ilants. The police tlieory that of the a jewelry, s his a working the | was the cause | are on vendetta FOOD SUPPLY STATIONS, Boston, May 28 stations in every { ccnservation of vege tablishment of city and town for surpl fruits and ables produced during the sum- mer was urged at a conference here today of food officials from various | parts of England. The gather- ing” was called by the Massachusetts fcod administration because of the | prospective increase in food produc tion in this s tion and necessity for rreventir Dehydrating of products was recommended by speakers representing the United | States department of agriculture. New SCHOOL OF AITH OPENS, Boston. M Public health ficials thr Massachusetts | tended the opening session today the Four-Day School of Health ’ | this city conducted by the state med- | ical society in conjunction with tha[ te department health and the rublic health service. The care of | water supplies was the principal mat- ter discussed today. Hancock | I potatoes and fertiliz- nley ea Gr ind Coal Co. our seed potatoes and fertilizer f 1 1075.—Advt. rowder's order to army or go to effect a get into the having the from ork is Several of are missed d haunts on an youtt dra street corners | street complained to the p electric light and ma battery hing were ame into opening arded traffic by on the Co. No. 5 extin Miller o1 < 1t of I afternoon disloc night police s the placing a openin hed the Ravmond Stanton, man | ing 100 cigare H T.ater he | auto Mr. and Mrs. George Pleasant street have received that their Norman lis in the Medic 5, ha | safely overseas. told the polic cigarettes in the Provost of on Provost, who Dehm of thi o trade, who tending the Wentworth ernment school at B recommended for ernment “tor and is | orders from Washington John maker by pattern been has been L position as a gov instr awaiting Johnson, a machinist at the enlisted a radlo oper Corbin 1 Re ctory, has serve as . WILL HOID HEARINGS on Orvder. Welcomes Suggestions Rate Increase Washington, 8 1inst the order of Director General increasing rates ap per t and fares to three Adoo nately 25 raising cen s Interstate pite all senger mile will heard hy the Commerce Commission, d 1 of that vesterday, proving actic in ap hearing. body the order without was pointed out ministration offi It we said that su be welcome either rom and concerns or from commission and it is way that tisfactory the new rates can he today by individuals state railroad hoped in this 1justment of made. ASSYRIANS CONTRIBUTE, Red Cross contributions amounting .33 were offered at the Sunday of the Persian Assyrian mis- connected with the South Con- gregational church Rev. F B rmon the Persian ave generons- contribut- servic sion NO POTICEMAN WITH BOYLE. Tt s erroneously stated in paper that William of 131 reet had taken to Camp Up under police escort It develops that Boyle went voluntarily and without the guardian this Royle been to ¢ | | tion of | ea | 1esentative of | oi the p of a policeman. The informa- the Herald published was sup plied by a member of the second dis trict exemption board. ARFIELD'S May 28 WHITE G ington White, form Mine pr t AID. John = of the U HnV America and or to the fuel a appointed rep Fuel Administrator Garfield on the labor policy I ording to announcement today The hoard will soon institute an in vestigation of the needs of labor a view of formulating president Worlke of labor iv ation, has heen board, with a labor budget TO ATTEND CONFERENCE, Rev B & S the Swedish Lutheran church, Wednes y to attend a ference at Rockford, Tl gone for about two weeks, and dur- ing his absence the pulpit will be lled' by ministers from this section state. Dr. Ohman will the synod meeting at Minn of | will | con- | He will be | man, pastor also tend Minne BOY BICYCLIST HIT. John Willlams, of 83 E. Main ! street, Plainville, told the poclice last | night that while driving to New Brit- | ain he struck a boy on a bicycle ona ! Wes 1 & ear Corbin avenue. | The boy was only slightly injured and ; refused to give his name. S e e | AYS Rou"ht has borne the signa= 1S, n. | icteher, ond nas been made under his ision fo 30 years. _Allow no one . Counterfeits, Imitations and 1 small | treets | word | irrived Freight | Complaints | the | railroad | § gestions would ood’” are but experiments, and endanger the ‘hildren—Experience against Experiment. What is CASTORIA ast Y‘fi is a harmless substitute for Castor Oil, Pare- goric, Drops and Soothing Syruy It contains neither (?mum Morphine nor other marcotic substance. For more than thirty years it has been in constant use forthe relief of Constipation, Flatulency, Wind Colic and Diarrhoea; allaying Feverishness ar therefrom, nd by regulating the Stomach 2nd Bowels, aids the as- similation of Food; giving healithy ¢ tural sleep. The Children’s Panacea—The Mothe: The Kind You Have /Always Bough Bears the Signature of (4 in Use For Over 30 Years THE CENTAUR COMPANY; REW YORK CITY. HEWIER, PICKHARDT & DUN "’x \lam N., Opp Arch St. Phone . 1409 Our Semi-Annual Clearance Sa on Coats and Suits Tremendons sacrifice of prices will prevail throughout th YOUR DECORATION DAY NEEDS, NEW BLOUSES. different from carly Spring Models. DAINTY LINGERIE BLOUSES. TAILORED AND SPORT BLOUSES. CHINE AND CEORGETTE CREPE Bnousm WOME WHITE WASH SKIRTS in Gaberdine, Linon, Poplin, Pique and Wash Satin. 5 SLIP-ON SWEATERS. efrechingly CREPE DE Excellent value at $3.00. Made of soft light weight S Wool in the most effective of Sport Colors. SUMMER HOSIERY, UNDERWEAR AND CORSFTS. These you will want and our stocks now are at their hest prices arve lower than they will be later in the season. THE QUALE TY STORE TEL. TEL: ; 805 806 8 SPECIAL FOR WEDNESDA Cash and Carry Van Camp’s Milk 2 for 25¢ Challenge Milk r()\l ATOES 15¢ can PINEAPPLES 27¢ can SQUASH 18¢ MINCE MEAT 2 for 25c¢ RUMFORD'S BAKING POWDER 140 10¢ pkg. BAKING BEANS 15¢ 1b MUSTARD (large jar) 10¢c Fancy Prunes 10clb VAN CAMP'S TOMATO SOUP 3 cans 25c R. & R CHICKEN SOUP 100 cans 25 ¢ FANCY COFFEE 30 Corn Starch 9c pkg. ; 6c KIRKMAN'S POWDER FRESH VEGETABLES NEW CABBAGE 4c 1b NEW ONIONS NS 2 Ibs 25c. 2 BUNCHES RARERIPES RHUBARB 4c Ib MACARONI ASPARAGUS TIPS 2 WASHING SODA 1 Ibs 25¢ SPINACH 25¢ pk LET TUCE 7c. NATIVE OUKES 2 fo Ad. HALL, £38 Main Stree ASPARAGUS 2 bunches 25¢ Main Floor Covered, Front Deor to Back Door--Select Your Style Now While the Se! Sleepers, Strollers, Go Carts, Gigs and Sulke From $3.50 to $45.00 (A TIP)—If you are ever going to need Furniture BUY NOW. B.C. PORTO 222224 Main Street | Opp. the Park