Lakeland Evening Telegram Newspaper, May 15, 1914, Page 2

i | e | Y | 1 ! | | il i |l b ] PAGE TWO EVENING TELEGRAM, LAK Probably the man who kicks the most against the income tax is least Bt by it | Reversed Lever, Many a cloud a silver lining has, This should flluminate the shroud; Stealing radium from a cancer is /Mke stealing pennies from a dead But we get mixed 1d find that many B " eyes A silver lining 1 a cloud. A Brave Man. Kissimmee Prairie, a village in Flor- ! %, should be a paradise for DeWly wq men of this generation, is courage. e We are shirkers. We run before the Somebody has invented a new dance torm: Even before our physical ills y has invented a new : TRl e i ® we quail like children. ealled the Swiss movement. It mllI Al R (R e il e would you do, sir, if you were like Job | and had a carbuncle on the back of your neck? Lecturer—I'd face it, sir!—Life Conscientious Preparation. new | Fashdon decrees that the | “Are you a professor of mathemat- clothes for men shall be plainer. The 'y on ookaq My, Cumrox. moen themselves are plain enough DOW. gy caid Mr. Hibrok. |you do not think of taking up the study!” “Yes, I do. I want to plod patiently through algebra, calculus, logarithms and all the rest of the outfit. After that maybe I'll feel competent to fig- ure out my_income tax.” Mafl ewindlers have cost the coun- try $129,000,000 in the last two years, and they were not worth the price. Now they have discovered that the Bekimos have an extra joint in their back, but who wants to be an Es- kimo? It that automatic restaurant really elminates the waiter with the unman- Mcured nails it has accomplished no Lecturer—My friends, what we lack, | \ “Surely Start to save vacation early. money A girl always fancies that her lover thinks her tears are sweet. The woman with a sunny disposi- tlon seldom makes things hot for her husband. The best thing about evil predic- , tions is that very often they don't come true. One of our neighbors has a daugh- ter who plays cubist music. At least | 1t sounds like it. z Mona Lisa's lip curve is better un :darsmod when a 400-year-old Titian goes for a pifiling $335,000. Let us be thankful that lots of wom- en cannot and do not'in the least re- | semble the fashion plates. Some men leave footprints on the sands of time, and others leave finger prints at police headquarters. i SO s ¢ It can hardly be denied that if the telegraph operators strike they will ituation, small feat hold the key to the SNAP SHOTS AT L. H i\ i i A 1—Up a Tree. 2-—Lloyd Hooks and Wil Hetherington, Business Manag er and [Editor (rescent 3 Attention, Their Undivideq Seniors Sunning Sa id Plant City? Giving JUST TO PLEASE HER [ [ . [ [ [ o e BY BARRY PRESTON. that trouble you, would you, Billy?" Marion Orton looked up from the outspread pa- per on her knees and raised her pretty brows at the big, troubled young man who paced up and down ths ver- anda “Little thing?” echoed Billy Cap- en, “Little thing? Here's an old and honored name dragged through the mire 1e per- fectly ¢ u- tation torn tO shreds, honest | motives twisted I and warped “Didn't you expect it?" she ask “Well, not anything so bad as tt he confessed. “It's a nice mess you've got me into, isn't it?"” “Oh, Bllly, you're such a quitter,” she sighed “T never wanted to run for mayor, anyway,” said he. “You egged me on to it. “T wanted you to do something more worth while than amuse yourself,” said she. “Billy, you have great pos- gibilities in you, if you'll only really tey. “Well, I've tried,” said he. “And this is the result. Mud-slinging, repu- tation-wrecking, a joke to all your friends. Why, only this afternoon as I was coming up here T met Bob Whit- ing and Charlie Green and they seemed to think it was excruciatingly funny to give three cheers for her honor, the next mayor. Of course, there's no chance of my being elected, but they needn’t make quite such a silly joke of it.” “Perhaps you won't be so much of a joke after election tomorrow.” “Don’'t you belleve that,” sald he. “I've got just about as much show as a snowball in—in—July,” he ended lamely. It was 3 o'clock the next afternoon when Billy Capen, rather whitefaced rushed up to the veranda where Mar- fon Orton sat fussing with tea things. “Say, what am I going to do?" he groaned helplessly. “About what?" she asked “I've been hanging around headquam ters,” he sald. “It seems that I'm i going to be elected beyond the shadow of a doubt.” “Oh, Billy!" she cried radiantly, “It's awful,” he groaned. “What'll 1 do?” She stared at him, “T believe if I really am elected, Il go right down and resign,” sald he. “Billy Capen,” she cried, “I'd like to shake you!" “I wish you would,” he said lugu- briously. “I'll make a sweet little mayor, won't 1?2 Well, the downfall of this beautiful burg be upon your head. You put me up to it. You in- duced me to run when the reform crowd put my name up. Now, see what you've done?” “It's perfectly splendid,” she cried. “Why, Billy, you're the right man for the right place. They've needed you for ever so long. I know you've got: it in you—" i “T wish T thought that way," said he, “Didn't you want to be elected?” “NU!" She stared at him, “Then—then what on earth did you run for?" “Well, T though there wasn't the least chance of my getting it; so I didn't see how it was going to do any harm, and I though the attempt, the trying, would show you—well, would please you, Marion, and—and—oh, hang it, the plain truth of the matter {s I wanted to make good with you. Now I've gone and got elected mayor, and—and—if I've got to be his honor, you'll have to be her honoress—the power behind the throne.” She flushed slightly. She did not look at him., Instead her eyes were fixed on the blue flame flickering be- neath the bubbling brass kettle “If I do—If I consent to be her hon- oress, as you choose to call {t—will you do just as I say?” “Why, of course.” “Then you won't throw Mike Touhey out as head of the street department? You know Mike was our gardener here “And you'd let a little thing like | & % pleasure to show our goods, The Loss by Fire in the U, § Ve keep up with the very newest things in faney footwear. Itg, nd our aim is to fit you. We are tpy Iv store in Lakeland that ues the custom fitting methods, P, § ofofoiideg DUTION-HARRIS ‘" (;0 Store of »0Quality FOOT FITTERS We Repair Shoes While You Wait. # L Ay 122 Ky. Ave. B e 80 B B B < i B e A B D B A el B B B BB B During a Recent Year Amounted to Almost One-Half the Cos Of All New Buildings Constructed During the Entire We represent the following reli- TWClVfi Moth! able companies: Fidelity Underwriters, When Buying or Building capital ...... .. .. 4,750,000 Philadelphia Underwriters, Provide the Means capital .... .. el $4,500,000 German American, capital 2,000,000 8pringfield Fire and Marine womow 107 ReDuilding MANN & DEEN Room 7, Raymondo Building so they cameto Our Store And that they hadn’t come before They now think, is exceedingly strange. % Buy One of Qur New Modern Ranges And you'll wonder how you got along with that old stove so long » THE FAVORITE AND THE LIBERTY are splendid makes, having every desirablg improvement. The varying styles and sizes make once. I'm very fond of Mike.” for a good minute. “Why, Mike's the biggest grafter of the whole ring. It's his scalp the re- “Even if I won't marry you if you do?" “Even if you won't marry me if 1 do,” he repeated She put out the lamp under the kettle She J T as she slipped Billy Capen stared at her silently | form crowd is particularly after. IM| have to throw him out whatever you | & RANGE of prices suited to al] pocket books L ARRANGE TO HAVE ONE OF OUR RANGES PHONE 71 oPPOsITE DEPOT