Lakeland Evening Telegram Newspaper, August 18, 1913, Page 7

bows.” “That’s no excuse.” “It hain't, eh? Not when he’s bitten every one of her bows and driven them away? They have all swore that either the dorg must go or they would.” | “He bit the young men that came to call on her, did he?” asked Mfss Lena, all at once interested. | “Fiercely.” ot “And she gave him to you on that account?” “I'l eross my heart on {t.” | “Mavybe I'd buy him if he wasn't so homely.” | “That's what high roclety is after— homely dorgs. The homelier the bet- ter. Got any bows?" “Yes,” admitted the girl blush. “Anv veu want to get rid of?” “Y-e-.” “Then don't be two minits closin® this deal' One of your bows come in ard bowes and scrapes and takes & cheer. Abeut the time he has got his legs erossed and is ready to talk love Nero sneaks around and takes & bite.” “And what follows?” “What follers? Lemme tell you that what follers would make a hen laugh! There's a sudden jumpin' up. There's a sudden swear-word. There's a gig- zling in which vou do all the work. ‘Then there's a sudden ‘goed night,’ and a-gettin' cut doors, and that bow nev- er comes within a block of the house a agin’. Can't you imagine {t?" ¢ “You come back to the houce and I'll | p M ' OR UODALE get the money for you,” said the girl, '} ° o C as she softly gigled at the picture the | = : The Florida Avenue Grocer boy had drawn. PHONE RED—290 The money was paid and Nero { changed bands. He made no objec- | M Respectfully asks his friends and the publ generally to_give him a call when needing | tlons, and he seemed so content and Fresh Meats, Groceries, Vegetables, Etc. - gentle that the new owner had her HE WILL TREAT YOU RIGHT AND WILL GUARANTEE SATlSFACTION o WHY SAFER THAN CASH Paying by checks is not only more convenient than pay- ing in cash, but it is safer, beccuse it eliminates risk of loss. Your account subject to check--large or small--is cordially invited, AMERICAN STATE BANK J.LSKIPPER , P.E. CHUNN President Gashier with & btograph of the immense steel dock shed constructed by the American government at Cris terminus of the Panama canal, taken at the time of its dedication. 290 Btations. tress. | about these | Angry Ac | “Why these pouts?” ) doubts about his biting anybody. In “Look at this press notice,” stormed | 5 FHENEH UUE fact, her father looked the dog over the actress. | and doubted if he would bite a mutton- “The critic speaks highly of your chop. genius.” “What did you get such a rat for & “And never mentions my gowns!” dog?” was asked. “To bite some of my callers.” “Go ahead. I guess you'll pick out | § the right one from the gang. : It was the poetic young man’s eve-, ning for calling. He had spent the i whole day composing a sonnet to Miss | Lena's nose, and had finished and brought it along. Such was his impa- m?" something Clever Ruse Whereby Popular Maiden Rids Herself of Su- - I perfluous Admirers. By LAWRENCE ALFRED CLAY. Miss Lena Walters was troubled in | her mind. When a girl bas four differ- WILL SING FOR YoU! gll the other world-famous sing- jave a VICTROLA., lusive agents for the Victor ent admirers and can't say which she prefers, it's a mighty solemn situation. Well might she pause and reflect. Na- | tions have riser or fallen over easier { problems than that. No. 1 had curly hair and a lisp. He was simply delightful. No. 2 had a drooping mustache and arched eyebrows. He was charming. No. 8 not only had the poetic expres- elon, but he also wrote sonnets. He had written one sonnet to her eyes and another to her chin. No. 4 sat and sighed most of the time when he called, and he had eyes out of which a lost soul seemed to be gazing. tience to read it, and hear her words of praise that he took no notice of the dog. He had scarcely been greet- ed when he took the manuscript from | his pocket and began: “No blooming rose With Lena's nose, In soft repose Can—the devil!” [ “Why, Mr. Davis!” exclaimed the owner of the nose. | “Some darned thing bit me! There it 1s—a wretched little rat of a curl™ “Str!” “Yes, bit me to the bonme, and Ifii may be a case of the rables!” | “But you can have a case of the! ANOTHER DROP IN MAZDA LAMPS 25 watt Mazda 40 60 60 100 150 unskirted skirted 35¢ 350 450 60c 80c 5 $1.30 250 g $2.00 We carry a stock of lamps at the following places and a$ our shop: LAKE PHARMACY HENLEY & HENLEY Mr. Walters was a business man and ' rables and still be a gentleman, can't rather brusque. He paid very little at- ' you?” ' | tention to eoclety, and to who came | “No, sir—no, sir, I can't! If you and went, but after pumping against have started in to keep a mad dog im | a score of young men in the hall at the house you must—ahem-—excus® | wey /7 e Barnk pires you a welcome . ter: “Lena, you tell the cook to have her ' way to the first hospital to be treated. ' one time or other he gaid to his daugh- me from—" And out he bounced and made his | goes o1t to the man whke has MONEY IN §oy in the bunk enables you to carry eut yeur : jhers to join youput In an enterprise. Try to @l without some MONEY OF YOUR OWN; i§t with SOMI MONLY that 1s ours; yeu UADVISB YOU on business matters, an time, Your Banking With Us National Bank LAKELAND | Life of Linen work 15 wihat you am lesking fee and amghving. Try ma d Steam Laundry West Main B0 young men come to the kitchen door | after this.” “Why, the cook is a married wom- | an,” was the reply. “Are they chums of the butler?” “Of course not.” “Then what do they want here?® *“Why, papa. they are my callers.” “Humph! Better get rid of all but one. They wear out the rugs.” And, being troubled in her mind, ’Mlu Lena did a much more sensible | thing than to retire to her room and | fiing hergelf on the bed and weep. She | put on her hat and took a stroll to do | some serious thinking. be bounced, but suppose that erisis had come? Suppose the young lady found herself compelled to say to num- ber one: “Pirdie Rockingham, your halr curls fn the most delightful profusion and confusion, and that lisp is something to make an angel eit up and listen for more, but this is a life of sadness and disappointments. 1 wish you well, and I will be a sister to you, but you must make your hike. Find some other angel and be happy with her.” Miss Lena was finding cold chills creeping over her when a voice at her elbow addressed her: “Say, you, don't you want to buy & dorg?” ! It was a gamin of about twelve, and | tn his arms he had a dog—a French bdull dog. | | “Mercy on me, is that a dog?” cried the girl as she started back. | “You bet. He's worth $50, but I"Tl " take 25 conts!” | The Freonch nation sends us chio dresses and hats and cloaks, but when it comes to bulldogs they are & dead faflure. It is as if they took 8 coon. a rabbit, a suzar beet and a cab- bage head and bofled them down to- gether and poured the hodge-podge ' into a mold and called it a dog. They ! are warranted to scare babies into fits | and the elephants of the country in & single night. ! “He can't he a dog,” protested Miss Lena. “He sure in, mies,” was the reply. { “He's homely, but he's all the go in so- clety. The terrier and the poodle are { mot in it with him” “But you have stolen him!* “Not a bit of it.” “But you can't own a $50 dog.” “Say, lemme tell you something. He was given to ne this morning by & young lady.” “Then he can't be a nice dog.” “Hold on a minute. Why did she | give him to me? Bekase she The father hadn't spoken serfously, \ and none of the four admirers would | It wasn’t the evening of No. 2 to call, but being at the umbrella mend- | er's on the corner, he thought he'd run | in for a moment and ack Miss Lena it her father's business had been unfa- vorably affected by the tariff. He was cordially greeted, but hardly had he {opened the subject nearest his heart when he jumped a foot high and yelled | out: | “Holy smoke, but I've run against |y a live wire!” “It's only Nero,” the girl calmly as- sured him. | “What, that litle cur? Why, he's bit- | ten me!” “Yes, he bites most every one!” “Well, you must excuse me if I don't call again until I hear of his death!” | “Oh, certainly!” Number four—he of the sad eyes and sadder gighs—called the next eve- ning to ask for Lena's hand and heart. It was patent to her the moment sghe looked into those ead eyes, and she looked furtively around to see if Nero was on the job. He was. He was looking at the sad-eyed man's right leg. | “Miss Walters—Lena—you must have geen—you must realize that I— I thunder and hlazes!" “Why, Mr. Pilgrim!® “Your infernal little cur has bittem | me!™ “Yes?” “And—and—" “And I'm going to keep him right along!” “Then—then,” and out went the saéd eyed man, never to call again. There was only one more left—he of the lisp and the curly hair. He called next evening. Nero was ready for him, but the moments fled into hours, and there was no crisfs. At length he proposed matrimony and his case was taken under advisement Next day Miss Lena asked her father: “P~ma, will a man who let's a dog bite his leg for two hours and never make a complaint make a good hus band? “Tip-top!”™ was the answer. “Better have the wedding next month!™ The bridal tour had been made when the bride sald to her husband: “Have you any scars where Nero bit you that night?” | “Not a single scar! 1 was wearing sole-leather leggings!™ (Copyright, 1972 by the MeClure Newspa- per Syndicate.) o An electri¢ lamp nas twe base shaped quite like a fiower pot. The standard resembles the stem of o plant, while the shade of glass I8 shaped and colored like & flower. This lamp comes in two or three sizes, JACKSON & WILSON Cardwell ano Feigley Electrical and Sheet Metal Workers » PHONE 2331} COLE & HULL Areselling agents for the celebrated Harcourt & Co’s line of Wedding In- vitatlons, Letter |Heads, Business add Visiting Cards. We Invite you to call and see our samples. COLE & HULL Jewelers and Qptometrists Phone 173 Lakeland, He. “A Plecsure To Show Goods” For Fire Insurance =——————=SEE MANN & DEEN Room 7, Raymondo Bldg.