Lakeland Evening Telegram Newspaper, July 7, 1913, Page 8

i | | ! Ll PAGE EIGHT CLASSIFIED. ADVERTISING FOR SALE wili be sold cheap. Phone 242 Red b} HCRSE COLLARS?McGI.ASHAN. 819 \ FOR SALE—On easy terms, or will rent beautiful home, eight rooms, two story house, large lot cover- od with bearing orange and grape- fruit trees, just up hul from Lake Beulah, on west side. D. H. Sloan. 912 dirt. Kindling Apply at 886 TOR SALE—Free wood at $1.00 per load. Kibler Hotel. FOR SALE—Rubber tire trap i urst-| class condition. Fix 'Em Shop, Pine at., between Klorida and Tennessee. 923 ! )R SALE-—Will take as first pay- went on good house and lot in two blocks of school, a vacant lot or small cash payment and $12 per month on balance. Now rented for $15 per month. Dr. N. L. Bryan. 911 FOR SALE—One buffet, one couch, one range, two rocking chairs, four straight chairs and a kitch- en table, all in first-class condi- tion Apply Mrs. F. A. Morrell at Mrs. M. S. Booth’s, 927 FOR SALE---Good milch cow. F. B. Terrell. 924 FOR SALLE—One bouffet, one couch, one range, 2 rocking chairs, 4 straight chairs and a kitchen ta- ble, all in first-class condition. Apply to 309 South Missouri ave. or phone 114 Green. 927 ¥OR SALR—Fresh miled cow; also ' ene large horee, eight years old Apply to Pleard Bros, Drane bajldiag. Phone Ne. 6. 766 - ['OR SALE--New house of 9 rooms, bath, electric lights, corner lot 60 x 135; will be sold at a bargain. arties leaving town. The John F. Cox Realty Co. 937 HARNESS REPAIRING?— McGLASHEN. FOR SALE-—Good two-story house of 7 rooms and bath, electric light, corner lot 70 x 100, shade trees, $3,200. The John F. Cox Realty Co. 9317 e e e S S0, eSS FOR SALE—A bargain; Hudson 33, 1912 Model Auto. In nrst-cldss conditfon. New tires all around with 6 extra innter tubes. Apply Box 165, Lakeland, Fla. 936. FOR REN§—6 room house; shades and screens. One and a haif qsuares north of school, Florida avenue. Inquire ut Pillan’s groc- bath, ery. 864 TOR RENT—Furnished and unfur- nished rooms. Apply at 805 S. Florida ave. 928 FOR RENT-—Office rooms in the Smith Hardin building. The John| F. Cox Realty Co. 937 FOR RENT—Two furnished rooms for light housekeeping. Apply at 704 East Oak and N. Florida Ave. 933 Miscellaneous HARNESS?—McGLASHAN. 1y WANTED—Your safety razor blades 10 resharpen, made better than zew, 25¢, 35¢ and §0¢ dozen. Lake- | land Furniture and Hardware CoAi ‘e BRIDLES?—McGLASHAN. 81y The Ginger Man. | Bometimes the weather puts ginger | Mato come men. Then there is a kind ’ of man that all the time puts ginger fato everybody around him. Nobody a this old world is more useful to it tan the chap who gives his fellow men chots of ginger in all kinds of | weather, 1 two or three others might call in the GRACE AND HENRY The Whole Village Knew They' Were in Love When They Married. By MAUDE J. PERKINS. That Henry Walters and Grace Brown were in love with each other | when they married there could be no sort of doubt. Davisburg would have sworn to it. “Why, I saw 'em hold hands over an hour, and they did not let go once to scratch their noses, though I know they itched,” said little Mrs. Watkins. “And right with me looking om,” added Mrs. Flint, “he told her that it she caught the mumps and died he'd commit suicide!” No, there could be no question of their loving, and it seemed a safe thing to predict a happy future for them. Henry was a carpenter, earn- ing good wages, and though Grace knew little about housework, she was ambitious to learn. What brought the clouds after a few few months? Isn't it odd that lovers have no philosophy about them? They do not look for any change as time passes. There will be no cross words or falling off in demonstrations of affection. Behold them! Henry| ‘T wasloving you all the time I Was | ¢ook, whose name is Gerrit Gallandt, smashes his thumb with the hammer ; Quarreling with you.” "'a truthful man, fifty years old, who one day, and he goes home thinking | ‘‘Same here.” 'has been cook on many ships since | what a fool he was to hit his thumb | “We Will give you one minute more,” | he put to sea from Amsterdam 35 instead of the nail. He found his wite | came a throaty*voice from outside. | years ago. He has not been buck fn bed with a headache. She was| “Oh, Henry, it will most kill me to there since, vexed about it. Why hadn't the ail- | have 'em tar and feather you!"| e remarked that it was necessary ment come to some one else! Why j moaned the wife, {to anchor about three miles off the | wasn't Henry at home to put a wet cloth on her forehead and utter words , of sympathy? “You are an awfully careless man,” she said as he entered the house hold- ing his bruised and bleeding thumb. “If you hadn't got your feet wet or something you wouldn't have a head- ache,” was the reply. THE EVENING TELEGRAM, LAK ELAND, FLA, JULY 7, 1913. The whole village of | ds walked abroad in the nlmge’ | streets, ] One walked in advance, aud the E a1 others followed two by two. L The village slept and there was Do | one to observe them, but they did no(j l ! speak to each other and they walked | : i It softly. Moses Granger's bulldog could | Sh|p Cook Tells Mosquito Story | lick anything on four legs in the coun- | an Blas Coast. try, and had geen known to tackle a} of § thunderbolt. He was roaming around | when he caught sight of the ghosts, and the way he ran home was a cau- | Double-Headed Dutchman Relates How : tion. Natives by Their Ingenuity Were The nine paused in front of a cot- Able to Load Vessel With It inmates were snoring in Cocoanuts Quickly. i tage. peace. The nine passed through the gate New York.—The cook of the British and drew up in line before the door. | gehooner Carib 11, which was at the Then one of their number knocked | foot of West Twenty-fourth street, and fell back. After a minute a halt- | while in port, said that he was a “dou- dressed man opened the door to ask: , ble-headed Dutchman.” When ques- “Who are you, and what do YOU | tjoned as to the meaning of this phrase want 2" | the cook explained that a ‘“double “This is the committee of order. We | headed Dutchman’ was a sailor man sent you two warnings and you did | pajling from Amsterdam, Holland. not heed them.” { It is necessary to come from Am- “What is it, Henry?” asked the Wife | gtordam in order to be addressed by as she was aroused. | the above name. A man who came “They have come for us!” ' trom Rottendam, the cook said, would “Is it tar and feathers for you &nd | ot be a “double-headed Dutchman,” i 8 ducking for me?" ! nor could the native of any other city “It looks like it!" ‘ but Amsterdam use this title. “Come out and get your punish- | ment,” said a voice outside. “Hen-Henry, 1 am sorry [ have been i mean to you," sobbed the wife. “l have been the meanest of the! i two,” was the reply. ' ed schooner owned in Colon, and ar- rived with a cargo of cocoanuts from the San Blas coast. There were 390, 476 cocoanuts in the schooner's hold ! when she arrived, according to the “And think of their ducking you!” “My darling.” “My own!" beach when loading cocoanuts on the San Blas coast. He was asked how the cargo was got on board. “Time's up! Come to your doom,” ! “Mosquitoes bring it out,” replied sald the nine ghosts in chorus. | Gerit without the semblance of a Henry seized a hard wood chair and | giile. “The mosquitoes on the San smashed it on the uncarpeted floor, Blag coast are so large and smart that and handing one leg of it to his wife 'the natives use them to help out in he seized another and bounded out ' y,rigys ways. These were the first cross words and queerly enough each one was rath- er glad of it. It was a change from the honeysuckle program. Grace had | never thought that Henry could strike his thumb with a hammer, and if any one had told Henry that Grace would ever have a headache, he would have opened his eyes very wide. There was & whole month in which he could do no work. The wife whined over tne loss of income just as she wanted it for summer clothes, and even hinted that her husband was content to loaf. There had been nothing, however, that a few kisses and kind words could not have dispelled had the out- slders kept outside, but they didn’ty Thelr gossip and criticisms and ad- vice kept the pot boiling until each of the principals got the idea that he was a martyr and the other was whol- 1y to blame. Grace told the whole village Henry boxed her ears. Henry told the whole village that her cooking made him {11, and that her temper had become so Satanic that he was really afraid to sleep in the house. Grace warned the neighbors that it she was found chopped up with the ax some morning to see that Henry was promptly and properly hung as high as Mr. Haman or Captain Kidd. It was more exciting than a dog fight for a time, and there was talk that a boom in real estate would fol- low. Then the affair began to weary folks, and there was talk that the law ought to be invoked. Such a dog-and- cat couple ought to be made to get a divorce. Such a bickering must lead to murder after awhile. It was Dea- con Frazer who suggested a remedy. He was a good man, though the rem- edy he brought forward was rather heroic for a churchman. An anony- mous letter was received by the quar- reling couple. It was to the effect that if they did not at cease cease thelr bickering or apply for a divorce, something very unpleasant would hap- pen to them. “You can see what you have done!” sald the husband after reading his letter. “And you can see what you have done,” was retorted. “Nothing can happen to me. Every- body knows where the blame rests.” that “Surely they do, and you can't find | a person who does not pity me. I tell you, Henry Walters, you have reached the limit, and that letter means tar and feathers for you!" “It means a dJducking In the river of the door. Crack! Smash! Crack! | «ag goon as we anchored off the The nine ghosts had mnot anticipated ' const one fine morning we heard a nor prepared themselves for resist gound like a brass band. We thought ance, and the attack came with great ji was a native celebration after elec- suddenness. Three or four went down tion or something like that, but soon like cowsheds in a cyclone, and the | (p,o sky darkened and the ship was others made their retreat in tremen- | quickly showered by thousands of dous haste. None escaped without at | cocoanuts. It was the mosquito fleet least one good whack. The wife used | bringing out our cargo and the noise The Carib II. is a white, three-mast- | her chair leg with the vigor the hus- band did his. It should also be said that Moses Granger's bulldog, discov- ering that he had men instead of ghosts to deal with, pursued the flee- ing legs and left his marks on three of them. “What do you think!™ shouted Mrs. Hastings next morning as she burst in upon her neighbor, Mrs. Drew, “Somebody's cow dead?" “Na. sir. The Walters have made up!” Yt can’t be!" “But they have. 1 was in there ten minutes ago, and she was sitting on his knee, and they were so busy call- ing each other darling and dear that the ham for breakfast was all burn- ing up. and the coffee pot was boiling | over.” The statement not only turned out to be true, but it was proven that it was the last gquarrel to be made up. And yet the gossips were not happy. They said: “Isn’t it simply disgraceful the way Henry Walters and his wife love each other? Really, there ought to be something done about it!" (Copyright, 1913, by the McClure News- paper Syndicate,) MAKES PROFIT ON TINFOIL Owner of Tobacco Store Saves Dis- carded Wrappers and Sells Them —Llbrary as Trade Stimulus, “l am not ashanied to pick up a penny whenever and wherever I can,” sald the proprietor of a small tobacco shop In New York. “There are lots of people who think it is a sort of stigma upon their ability to pay so much attention to small sums. Not I, however. One scheme has netted me a very nice little profit every vear. Iruna small circulating library and T offer one year's subscription free for a $2 purchase. All my sub- scribers agree to return the book promptly after a week has expired or pay a fine of three cents a day. “Those people are more indifferent about pennies than 1 am and there is hardly one of them who does not keep for you, and don't you forget it!" There was less quarreling for a week, and then it broke out again. Then came a second anonymous let- ter. “The committee of good order will soon wait on you,” was the threat. “This is the second and last warning. It will come prepared to deal with your conduct as it deserves!” “Tar and feathers for you,’ whis- pered the wife. “A ducking for yvou,” whispered the husband. “And don't expect from me!"” “And you needn't expect any sym- pathy from me!” As a matter of fact, neither | alarmed. It was a village where law ! and order reigned. The minister and | any sympathy was | evening, and read husband and wife a lecture on the sin of quarreling and | endeavor to patch up a peace, but | there would be nothing bevond that. “And their talk wil 1 do no good | with me” said the husband, a book one or two days longer than he should. Not only do the sums | collect in fines pay for the books | purchase, but they even make a profit for me, and, what is more important, the library scheme helps to attract customers “Then, too, | manage to make sev- eral dollars a year by collecting the tinfoil used in wrapping up plug to- bacco and cizarettes. I usually find a good deal of it lying about on the floor and since I sell it for about 20 cents a pound whatever I get for it is pure profit.” Frog Skin to Heal Wound. W. A. Speck.-a farmer, living near Ames, la., had a growth that extended almost across his back a year avo, ; it was thought he had only a s time to live. He is well tc pluce where the growth w ed with the greenish skin ¢ When the growth w ! Des Moines hospital it left | wound. The amphibian epidc seems to be a success. “Nor with me either, unless you are to be taken to an insane asylum,” an- swered the wife. An hour after midnight one night nine men wrapped in sheets and hav- | ing pillow cases drawn over their Striving to Oblige, Angry Diner—Waiter, you fit to serve a pig. Waiter—I am doing my b Judge. Te not sir.— we heard was their loud humming. “We were very much frightened at first and ran below, but a native soon arrived in his canoe and explain- ed matters. He said that another fleet would be along pretty soon and that we must be careful not to be | struck by the cocoanuts as they fell. “The native said that efforts were | being made to train the mosquitoes to ! deposit the cocoanuts in the holds of . the vessel, but he did not expect this could be accomplished without a good deal of additional training “There was a good deal of satisfac. tion among the chiefs, the native said, over the new use that the mosquitoes had been put to. Before they were S0 admirably trained the cocoanuts had to be transported from shore in lighters and canoes to the waiting ships.” Gerrit Gallandt concluded his tale by saying that the Carib 1I. received her cargo on her visit to San Blas quicker than she had ever got one before. It's Something Awful the Way Flow- ers Grow ih Gravel on the Romney Branch. Romney, W. Va—Luther Burbank has been outdone on the Romney branch of the Baltimore & Ohio rail- road. Several weeks ago many brok- en floor boards in a car loaded with morning glory, nasturtium and sweet pea seeds allowed the seed to scat ter along the rallroad tracks and right of way for 28 miles. The heavy rains of last week and the sun brought up the flowers in Isuch profusion that the tracks are covered to a depth of three feet with | vines running in a riot of color. Bridges have been transformed {n- { to floral bowers, and the small train lon the branch no longer can make her schedule. On the heavy grade at Springfield entangling vines caused the train to stall, and the passengers, baggage and 71 packages of whisky, had to be unloaded to relieve the train of weight before it could proceed. One morning when Engineer G. W, Light took his train out nasturtiums bloomed all over the tender, putting out the fire Night and day shifts of trackmen are fighting the flowers from Green Springs to Romney. The Creen Springs station is buried under flowers, and the roundhouse at Romney is covered. Nasturtiums and | morning glories are sprouting in en- gine tenders and the running boards | have been transformed into flower | boxes, with the vines threatening to choke the boiler laggings. The road and rolling stock is overwhelmed with | flowers | Orders have been sent to green—l houses for consignments of cutworms, | Finds $2,000 Pearl, ! Long Branch, N. J.—A pearl, ap- | praised by experts to be worth $2,000, was found in a clam by a stranger to ! whom Captain Gharles Casler, a fishe erman, had sold a few at the whart here. The stranger procecded to open and eat them when he discovered the | precious gem. | | ———— Dies at Age of 108. | Bryan, O.—Mrs. Elizabeth Maughen | man, who died here at the age of 108, was the mother of 17 children. She was an inveterate smoker. maw - | | | Stop that shiftless, “hand to mouth” way now—begin to antici- pate the future by having a BANK ACCOUNT to call on when that chance comes or when an accident or illness, ete., overtakes you. The BANK ACCOUNT is a coa- stant spur to further thrift and good citizenship—it helps and protects you an dis ofereal benefit to the com- munity. 'THE NKE OF LAKELAND FLA | ° e o Special Notice : vig cf Six Reasons Why You Should Trade with Us: = 1. We are the Pure Food Store. o 2. We give Full “Weight.” fi 3. Clean and Fresh Goods. "l 4. We Treat You with Courtesy. w 5. Prompt Delivery. :u‘i 6. Our Foods are the “Best. ;" We want to sell you all you can eat. '::i ok i s - th hy Pure Food Store : W.P,Plllans & Co. PHONE93 & ag 8 t PURE ICE FOR : LAKELAND PEOPLE The ICE I am handling is made frot well water and double distilled. QUALITY. If the people wish thi 100 B 40 Itis notla question of quantity, b kind of ice they must stand by me. * L. W. YARNELL; Telegram 10cWe