Grand Rapids Herald-Review Newspaper, December 28, 1901, Page 4

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We Bra pis hear tevew Published Every Saturday, By I E. C. KILEY & SON. WO DOLLARS A YUAR IN ADVANCE qutered in the Postoffice ut Grand Rapids Minnesota, a8 Second-Cligs Matter Official Paper of Itasca County, Village of Grand Rapids and Deer Rover aud Town of Grand Rapids. KISSING BY.1 TELEPHONE. Bevel Performance in Which a Wom- an Seemed to Find Consider- able Satisfaction, | When the woman at the soda water ountain turned round to pay her bill he saw the fat clerk braced back inst the perfumery stand, fanning yhimself limply, says the New York Sun. al “Did you hear that?” he asked. “Hear what?” said the woman. “What?” he repeated, incredulous “It doesn’t seem possible that ¢snybody could become so absorbed in a glass of ice cream soda as to miss that. I am talking of the osculatory performance of the woman who just owent away from the ’phone. “Honestly, that custom is a new one on me. I’ve been working in -drug stores, one place and another, a good many years, and have heard several millions of women talk through the ’phone, but this is the tirst time I ever heard one of them kiss over the wire. “Sure, didn’t you hear it? Why, the smack sounded like a popgun. (ll bet the fellow at the other end st the line caught it, all right. He couldn’t miss it, even if he was away out in San Francisco. “I wonder if this thing of ending a telephone conversation is some- thing new, or is it an old fad that I am just catching on to because I am so mortal green? I’m used to hear- ing pet names slung over the wire by the dictionary full, but this is my first kiss, figuratively speaking. It’s junny. Long-distance kisses may be old style in other parts of the town, but I tell you they’re a novelty here.” SENTENCED TO BE SPANKED. A New York Magistrate’s Queer Meth- 4 of Dealing with a Trouble- some Boy, On the back-yard fence of the home of the Foote family at 653 Linwood -street, Brooklyn, the other after- noon, says the New York Times, were perched a grinning and ‘ex- pectant group of urchins. They were the playmates of 12-year-old “Heney” Foote, and with chuckles of glee they were waiting to hear him wail and howl.from within. “Heney” had been arraigned in the morning in the Myrtle Avenue police court. He was charged with commit- ting a slight offense, and Magistrate -Naumer was puzzled as to just how to punish him, Finally the court had an inspiration. “ll sentence you to be soundly spanked by your mother,” decided the magistrate, looking severely at the small prisoner. “Will you prom- ise to carry out this sentence, ma- dam?” turning to the lad’s mother. Mrs. Foote promised, and led “Heney,” who wore a look of utter dejection, out of court. Whether or not the sentence had been executed could not be positively learned. One of the urchins who had been perched on the back fence ob- served, however, with a finger laid along his nose and a deep wink of his left eye, that there had been “somethin’ doin’, all right.” DOG DIES FROM APPENDICITIS Autopsy Showed That as Unmistak- ably the Cause, Induced by Splintered Bones, And now the dog is subject to ap- pendicitis. At least Dr. William Coop- er Eidenmuller, of this city, claims to have made a discovery to that effect while performing an autopsy on the remains of a favorite pet, reports the San Francisco Examiner. “When the animal died,” said the jan, “I was not satisfied with taking off and made a careful autopsy. I was assisted by a veterinary surgeon, and we had not been long at our task when it became evident that death had resulted from acute appendicitis. “The animal had been ill for a year, and in reviewing his symptoms I can see that they were identical with those of humans who suffer from re- current attacks of this disease. Of course I did not at first think of a dog suffering from anything of this sort. There was no record of such ase among animals, plintered bones caused my dog’s death, and while I am not a veteri- nary I have come to the conclusion that bones are not the best diet for canines. Russia May Abolish Her Nobility. At present the czar’s subjests are divided into tour general classes—the nobility, the clergy, the inhabitants of the towns and those of the coun- “try, says a St. Petersburg corre- spondent. The nobility is itself of two kinds, hereditary and personal, An officer acquires a life nobility on acquiring a certain rank in the army or navy. Those who attain the rank of colonel in the army and of captain in the navy become hereditary no- bles. It is most probable that when the proposed reform of the Russian system of cl place the nobility will cease to exist 29 a separate class in the nation. S organization takes! FRANCE Is | MADE HAPPY. ! Delighted with mies Successful Man- euvers of the New Submarine Bont, the Gustave Zede, The submarine boat Gustave Zede has sent a thrill of joy through all France by her feat in striking the great battleship Jaureguiberry with a Dumont torpedo without her ap; proach being suspected. It was in the harbor of Abaccio, Cor- sica, that the erucial test took place. ‘The officers of the warship, though on the lookout for the Gustave Zede, did not know she was near till she rose to the surface and signaled that a torpedo was attached to the giant’s hull far under water. Paris is in eestasies. “Where now is Britain’s boasted naval supremacy 2” {s asked on every hand. It is added that there is evidence that France’s oavy is the most dreadful and power- ful in the world. The Gustave Zede is one of a long list of submarine boats—how long it is impossible to say, for the French gov- ernment has been careful to guard this seeret. It is a fact that France has been arming herself ever since the Fashoda affair, just after the Jameson raid. It is certain that France would not and could not stand another humiliation at the hands of the Brit- tsh, who are duly aware of it. These submarine boats have raised the confidence of the French people to a high pitch and they look with equanimity upon the fast growing number and size of Britain’s warships, feeling confident that their submarine boats can‘knock holes in all of them. The English papers make a joke of the feat of the Gustave Zede, remark- ing that “in the event of a war with Britain the whole French fleet would be submarine in short order.” MILLIONS YET FOR CHARITY. Andrew Carnegie Has $280,000,000 Which He Will Give Away in Public Benefactions, Andrew Carnegie still has £56,000,- 900 to give away in public benefac- tions, says the New York Herald. Mr. Carnegie himself is authority for this statement, which he made recently at Skibo castle to a member of the New York chamber of commerce commit- tee, who is now in New York city, but wishes his name kept secret. Several members of the New York ber of commerce delegation which went to England recently, visit- ed Mr. Carnegie at Skibo castle, and with them he discussed his gifts to the public. He remarked that in the future he meant to make other dona- tions, more extensive even than here- tofore, to public institutions. According to Mr. Carnegie, he is still undecided in what manner to dis- pose of his wealth for the publie good. He wishes the public to obtain the best results from his future benefac- tions, and for that reason has not yet formulated any philanthropic state- ments. Mr. Carnegie admitted that free li- braries and other educational instit- tions would undoubtedly obtain a por- tion of the millions in question, in or fler that the plans he had previously adopted would be fully developed. His hearers judged from what he said that, he was considering the advisability of directing his wealth toward endow- ing and supporting art galleries, scien- tific museums and similar institutions. REMARKABLE REUNION. Brothers Who Each Thought the Othe er Dead Brought Together After Halt a Century’s Separation, A remarkable reunion has been ef- fected between two brothers in Henry county, Ind., after a separation of nearly half a century, during which time each thought the other dead. Barton and Jabez Guyer lived with their parents in North Carolina. In 1852 Barton left home to make his way in the world. He went to Texas, thence to Mexicc, finally returning to Texas, where he located. He wrote his brother repeatedly, but receiving no reply to his letters gave him up for dead. Jabez, never receiving any in- formation from Barton, lost all trace of him and likewise mourned him as dead. Barton enlisted in the confederate army and served until peace was de- slared. Jabez Jater on moved with his family to Henry county, Ind. Recent- ly a relative of the family learned shrough a conversation with a travel- ing salesman of a man named Barton Guyer .n Harrisburg, Tex. © Corre- spondence developed the fact that he was the long-lost brother. Honor for a Woman, A distinguished honor has been con- tered on Miss Elizabeth Nourse—dis- tinguished in that it has only once be- fore been conferred on a woman who was not a native of La Belle France. She has been elected a member of the Societe des Beaux Arts, and this is a sitle that takes rank as a gold medal, first-class. Miss Elizabeth Nourse isa native cf Cincinnati, and pursued her art studies in that city before guing abroad. She and her sister, Louise, are at present in Paris, France. One of her sisters was the wife of Benn Pit- man, the distinguished artist, author and scholar. A Swift Messenger Boy. A Louisville woman is suing a tele- graph company because one of its mes- sengers, “traveling at a great rate of speed,” ran against her in the street, says the Chicago Record-Herald. The boy had probably been let off to go to 2 ball game or something. Pay Emperor Fine Compliment, ‘The Germans have paid their. em peror a fine compliment, says the Chi- zago Record-Herald, im deciding that a man who would assault him must necessarily be crazy. ney J worth’—Go! olde Days, OUR English boys stood on the deck of F a fast-sailing craft in the Mediterranean —which seemed to be making for the north coast of Africa—working sullenly and with downcast faces. One would rather have expected them to be looking bright, and keeping timé to their work with a song, for theday was beauti- fully fine, and the vessel bounded over the mmooth sea at a grand rate. But their gloomy looks were fully explained by. the presence of a dozen or more dark, keen-eyed, fiercelooking men in eastern dress, one of whom—a big, powerful, savage fellow, with a hideous scar across his bearded face-- shouted some order to the four lads every now and then, followed up with a volley of abuse in a strange, outlandish tongue. His manner was enough to depress any- one, and then his cursing and abuse were felt harder because they had never been used to such treatment before. The thoughts of the boys were as gloomy as their faces, and under the circumstances it could hardly be different. ‘The fact was that the Bristol bark Jacob, to which these boys belonged, had been ‘cap- tured two days before by a Turkish corsair, and the pirates had decided upon carrying their prize into Algiers, and selling her crew zs slaves to the Moors of Barbary—the usual fate of Christian captives in those days. But a sudden squall had separated the two vessels, and the Jacob was left alone upon the sea with a crew of t3 Turks, in- cluding the big officer above mentioned, and the four English sailor lads, who had been put on board to assist in working the ship. Certainly the poor fellows might well look gloomy, with such a prospect before them; but anyone who had looked closely at the face of Jack Long, the eldest of the four, a tall, active, curly-headed lad of 17, would have noticed a sudden gleam in his~ bold, brown eyes which showed that he had not lost all hope even now. “I say, Harry,” whispered he to Harry Cook, while helping him to haul in the slack of a rope, “are you game to fight if there’s a chance of our breaking loose?” “Rather!” answered Harry, emphatically —“anything rather than be made slaves of by these rascals.” “Well,” said Long, “T’ll tell you how : think we might do it.” And, bending forward, he whispered e few words in his comrade’s ear. Harry Cook’s face brightened at once, and i he was just about to speak, when a warning | gesture from Long checked him. “We mustn’t be seen talking together, or these chaps will suspect something; bat, when you get a chance, just tell Jones and Tuckey yonder what we’ve planned, and see that they’re ready to bear a hand wher they’re wanted.” Jack Long’s plan was simply to wait till the greater part of the pirate crew had gone below to rest (which they were now doing one by one, having been kept om deck all night by the storm), to imprison them by clapping on the hatches and battening them down, and then to attack those who were left on deck. It was a desperate venture, and certain death if it failed; but death itself seemed better than the hideous bondage that await- ed them in Algiers, and when Cook had succeeded in communicating the scheme to Tuckey and Jones, the looks exchanged by the four young heroes showed that they “meant business.” Meanwhile the day was wearing toward afternoon. The breeze had died away, and everything was stiflingly hot and close. Al! of the Turks had gone below but five, four of whom were lying half asleep on the deck, while the grim commander himself, Hussein Ali, had sat down to smoke his pipe in the shadow of the mainmast, still keeping a watchful eye, however, on the four prison- ers. All at once he rose to his feet and looked anxiously upward at the sky, as if fearing that this sudden calm might betoken en- other storm. Then he shouted: “Take in the mainsail.” “Now, boys,” whispered Long, as they hastened to obey, “we'll stow that sail clum- sily, and that old billy goat will get savaye and come aloft to show us how to do it, and then, the minute you hear me sing out: ‘A!I clear below!’ grip him and chuck him over board.” Brave aa they were, all four felt their hearts beat quicker as they mounted the rigging, knowing that a few minutes more must decide whether they were to live or die. To work they went, and, as Long had foreseen, Hussein Ali soon came rushing aft, shouting, angrily: “Is that how you stow e sail, you Chris- tian dogs? Your backs shall smart for this presently.” “All clear below!” cried Jack Long, as the Turk came within reach. Instantly Hussein Ali’s bulky figure was seen flying downward; but the powerfu! Mussulman was not to be so easily disposed of. Instead of alighting on the deck or in the water, he fell harmlessly into the hollow of the sail, and, clutching a rope, swung him- self on to the port bulwark. In another mo ment he would have been safe on the deck; but just then Long, who had's!id down like lightning by a weather backstay, snatched up a heavy spar and dealt the pirate a blow on the head that sent him down into the sea like a stone. “Now, Jones,” said the young leader, “clap the hatches upon those fellows below, while we jump for’ard and tackle the rest.” Jones obeyed, but the noise that he made in doing so fairly aroused the four sleepers on the forecastle, who had been already dis- turbed by the sounds of the scuffle with Hussein Ali. All four sprang to their feet at once, ard, drawing their long ar iees rushed upon the English boys. But just at the right moment Cook let go the forebrace on the starboard side, and the heavy rope flew back among the Turks, knocking one overboard and completely stunning a second. Long’s club felled the third, while Tuckey grappled the fourth, and soon had him at his mercy. Then, having tied the four disabled men to the mast, our heroes let loose the helm, which had been lashed amidship, and pro ceeded to get the craft’s head around. But their perils were not over yet. A heavy thumping suddenly warned them that the nine imprisoned pirates below were try- ing to force open the closed hatch, which trembled at every stroke. “Drag that coil of rope on to the hatch; boys!” shouted Long. “All together, now! Pulling with all their strength, they suc ceeded in getting the heavy-coil upon the hatch, and, piling on top of it spars, blocks, chains and everything else they could get hold of, imprisoned the ruffians beyond all power of escape. The ship was now their own again, ond early next morning the four daring lads brought her safely into Gibraltar, whith at that time belonged to Spain, where they turned the tables upon the pirates by » Ning them to the Spaniards for $50 apiece, 4, hich —as Jack Long remarked, with a grin—was “a ‘a great deal more than the rogues were ae *FURNING THE TABLES) NEW INVASION | OF INDIA. American recperet Are Carryiry All Before Them in the Orient. The idea that the native Indian es- | chews all but his native tobacco, which he takes mostly in the form of cheroots, receives a hard shock from the newly issued official Review of the Trade of India. It appears that in 1898-99 the imports of manufactured tobacco, especially in the shape of cigarettes, underwent much expau- sion, It is no longer true that the con- sumption of imported tobacco is prac- tically confined to the Anglo-Indian population. Cigarettes made in Amer- ica are being extensively now with special reference to the re- quirements of the native smoker, says | They are greatly { the London Mail. in evidence in and about Calcutta and other large cities, where they are be- ginning to supersede the unclean and unsavory compounds smoked in na- tive apparatus. Imported cottons have largely su- perseded the production of the native handloom; imported mineral oil and dyes have superseded the inferior ar- ticles produced in the country, to the great advantage of the consumer; im- ported sugar is also gradually begin- ning to thrust back the inferior and dirty sugar hitherto offered to the Indian consumer; and now it seems that Indian tobacco is to recoil be- fore the invasion of foreign tobacco made up in neatly packed cigarettes. Another turn of the wheel, and when the people have become accustomed to the better article the capitalist will arise and make it on the spot of Indian tobacco, to the advantage | of both producer and consumer, 33s has been done with cotton goods and will be done with sugar. THERE WAS A MISTAKE. Case of Genuine Honesty That Teoh an Incredulous Scoffer Off His Feet. “T think,” he began, as he halted a pedestrian on a back bay street in Boston, “I think I made a mistake with the cabman who drove me to the art gallery. I am quite sure I gave hima ten dolar bill, but he must have mis- | taken it for a two dollar bill.” “And you_hope to find him again?” asked the man, who was a stranger in the city, relates an eastern exchange. “Why, yes, I have hopes.” “Well, you are about as green as they make ’em. That cabman delib- erately swindled you out of many dol- lars.” “I can’t hardly believe it. He looked so honest and truthful that I—I—” “That you ought to have asked him to hold your watch and the rest of your money! My dear old Josh from the cornfields, let me say—” At that minute a cab rattled up, and the driver dismounted and said: “See here, old man, there is a mis- take. You probably meant to give me a two dollar bill, and I thought it was one whenI gave you one dollar change.” “But I think it was a ten, my friend.” “No, it was. a twenty, and I have been driving about for half an hour to find you and restore the money. Here it is.” “And what was it you were goin’ to say to your dear old Josh from the cornfields?” asked the old man, as he | turned to the stranger. But the stranger was there no long- er. He was flying for a subway car as if running for his life. A CLEVER CHINEE. He Draws 2 Keen Comparison of iis Religion and Other People’s. “One of the most brilliant men of my acquaintance is a Chinaman,” said John B. Galore, of New York, toa Washing- ton Post reporter. “He has a tea house up in our metropotis, and he isaschelar as wellas importer cf the leaf. We were talking about the Chinese imbroglio several days ago, and conversation drifted from Boxers and the taking ot Peking to the teachings of Confucius. He called attention to the fact that mis sionaries were trying to Christianize native Chinese who cling to a religion which has stocd the test 6,000 years, and had nearly 300,000,000 followers, imported | Bee MEE aR Ee ae eae ARE ae he aE ae age Se a Aa AE A ATE ae ae ae ae ae at. ot AE ah AE AE ea a a ea aE | white the Christian religion is scarcely | 2.000 years old with many followers of | divided belief. “You Christian believers me,’ he explained, ‘of the Chinaman who stood on the river shore and watched the moon rise over the hill. A ray of sublime light came to him. It was beautiful. tioned at other places and he calied to them to come quick and behold hisown beautiful ray of light. They replied that they also followed beautiful rays remind | | | His friends were sta- | of light to the same moon. From what- | ever position they looked they caught a ray equally as beautiful. way with religion, and especially yours. You are looking at the light of good- ness, emanating from the Divine source, and each thinks he has a menop- oly, like the lone Chinaman with his one | ray of light.’” Women Rulers, Considerably more than half the hn- | man race is ruled by women. Two women — the empress dowager of China and the queen of England— alone govern about half the entire population of the world. The third in importance is young Queen Wilhel- | mina of Holland, whose home land numbers less than 5,000,000 souls, but | whose colonies have 30,000,000. Spain is ruled by a woman, Queen Regent | Christina, in the minority of her son, It is expected that the queen mother Margherita will have great influence | over her son’s kingdom, but her case is not needed to estabush the preporr derance of woman-ruled races. That’s the | EXAMINE THE FACTS before you paint, and you will use Moxall Fast Color Paints (ready mixed). ‘They are made right and sold right. We can prove to you that Noxall fast color paints are good paints—there are no better We can sell them to you lower than any other equally good paint can be sold. WHY? 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