Grand Rapids Herald-Review Newspaper, May 8, 1897, Page 4

Published Every Saturdi "By E.. KILEY. )OLLARB A YEAR IN ADVANCE mths $1.00 { Three Mouths, 50e the postoMce at Grand Rapids sesota. ag secoud-class matter: SESE OLICE COURT CASES. Humorees { Them Have # Bide. ority of the cases which we » daily are pathetic or dramat- here is a humorous side to the s well, and some of the most is incidents conceivable come tr courts, says Seribner’s. The .mon cause of complaint by un against another in tene- ise quarrels is that “She called of me name.” A woman told she wanted a warrant against » acquaintance because, as she Judge, your honor, she called e out of me place, and I want rove it.” Those petty broils given a hearing and settled good advice as the complaint s. "He treats me sometimes Dus,” was the complaint of one used wife against her hus- The man being brought up to the charge, and perhaps ¢x- answered: “This is a dead jealousy, your hongF; don’t An old Irish woman came me at the Harlem court and her “boy” arrested for misbe- himself in her hoyse, It came hat her “boy” was 38 years old, when I said to her that he was @ ty old boy she remarked: “Sure | not a gu’ri, and I count a boy a only when he’s married.” A Ger- | with a very much battered head lained that the defendant had | @ “dinge” in it, and described | ssault about as follows: “He do 1 cyack’on de kopf, like dis, and nodings by him.” Many of these le seem to feel that when they 2ke a complaint in court they must > all the high-sounding words they | now, regardless of their meaning. The result is sometimes amusing nough to upset the dignity of the neh. One woman who displayed a sed and battered appearance fin- d her complaint by saying: ‘He left marks of violation upon me arm, as your honor can see for yerself.” A | man whose truthfulness was questioned said: “Does your honor doubt me voracity?” A HAUNTED TREE. ——_—_ | The Coon Dogs Turned Tail When They Strack It. Last fall a party of coon hunters from this city were in the woods in this vicinity and the dogs hunted splendid- ly until they struck this old tree, says | the Danville (Ky.) Advocate. There they tucked their tails between their legs and simply flew. They whined and gave other evidences of fear and could not be coaxed into hunting any more that night. Finally the hunters them- selves became scared. One of them de- clared he heard the sound of a voice as if from some soul in deep distress. This settled it. Every man in the crowd suddenly remembered that he had busi- ness in town and townward the whole | layout proceeded without further par- leying or Joss of time. The next day an old gentleman residing in Danville was told of the occurrence and he re- called the fact that he had been one of the party which had a similar ex- perience near thie old tree three years ago and he said that the spot had been haunted for many years, A long time ago an old gentleman by the name of Louis Streat was murdered for his money and the murderer had dragged the body to the foot of this tree and | covered it with dry leaves. The mur- derer was never punished by law. A young man named Henderson was ar- rested, charged with the crime, and at his examining trial was liberated on $5,000 bail. He jumped his bond and disappeared some time afterward. . A New Evolution. Two or three mornings after the ar- | rival of a new butler the mistress of the house took the opportunity of ask- ing the cook how she liked her new fellow-servant. The report was an ex- cellent one. “In fact, ma’am,” said the | cook, “the servants’ hall is quite a dif- ferent place now.” Not unnaturally the mistress pressed for further par- ticulars. “Well, he talks so cleverly,” said the caok. “Last night, for in- stance, he. explained things to us for | an hour apd a half.” “Explained | things—what things?” said the mis- tress, now really interested, “Well,” was the’ reply, “he was telling us how we aré all descended from Mr. Dar- win.”"—Westminster Gazette. Foreclospré Against the Union Pacific Immediately upon the defeat ip the | house of representatives of the bill providing for the funding of the debt of the Pacific railroads, the Presi- dent directed foreclosure proceedings against. the Union Pacific and Kansas Pacific roads. These proceedings have been begun. An arrangement has been made with the Union Pacifje reorgani- zation committee by which the gayern- ment is to be paid not less than $45,- 754,000 in cash, including the sinking | fund. This is equal to the principal of -is not. bad. | thin, wiry build, the subsidy bonds, and interest at three and one-third per cent, so that it re- duces the loss of the government to the difference between six and three fend’ one-third per cent interest. "| imple: Dinners Are’ Now Conshtered|'the® Blegant Dinnera “A dinner engagement, no tmattér whether the: dinner be large or small, formal or infornial, is the-most exact- ing of social obligations,” says the Ladiés” Home Journal. “Indeed, I al- ways*felt a-donblé sense of obligation when” invited to a-small dinner. In selecting the:guests for the small din- ner choose: those who are congenial. If among your friends you: number physicians, lawyers or politicians, do not invite one: of each class, nor all of one class, simply because their profes- sions are the same, but select congen- jal spirits, Then small dinners, well arranged, are much more enjoyable than one large conventional dinner served to sixty ill-selected people. The food is better. service better and diges- tion better and even when trained help cannot be employed the hostess may enjoy the occasion as well as the guests, The art of dining, remember, is quite apart from the art of giving dinners. A reform in dinner-giving is being instigated. Simple dinners are now ‘the elegant dinners.’ The man who-has studied the art of living lives frugally. A hostess must never forget that during the short time her guests are under her roof she is re- sponsible for their happiness and com- fort: A huge dinner of twelve courses of badly blended food is not conducive to either. Savarin said: “The dinner is a place where men are never bored | for the first hour’; the insinuation that a second should prove a bore is rather prominent. If people in the ordinary walks of life are to make such enter- tainments a success they must never try pew or elaborate dishes, or even new ways of serving; they should sim- ply add an extra plate or two to the usual number and invite their friends.” FORGOT HIS PARCEL. Could the Ludy Have Been Wife? A rather unique instance of absent- mindedness occurred the other evening on the Jefferson avenue car line, gays the Detroit News-Tribune. The car was well filled with passengers and as a stop was made at McDougall avenye @ man stepped off the back platform, where he had been standing, and the car moved on. Instantly a wild cry went up from the late passenger, which broadened into a howl of despair as the distance between him and the trolley car wid- ened. As he shrieked he also ran and waved his hands frantically. The con- ductor, seeing the shadowy form in the dimness of the night and hearing the unearthly cries, pulled the bell-strap and thus induced the motorman to halt, which he did with a jerk. The man in pursuit came within hailing dis- His tance, “What d’ye want?” shouted the puncher of pasteWoard. eS want—the—lady—in there!” gasped the man, swinging his hat at the open car door. The car having come to a dead standstill, a woman arose, deliberately walked out of the car and was received by her breath- less escort, who had so nearly left her to her fate of missing parcels. Amid much laughter the next man who left the car in company with a | lady’ insisted that she walk in front of him until safely on the ground. A Boy's Essay on Journalism. From the Atlanta Constitution: A bright little boy who attends one of | the city public schools was told by his teacher a few days ago to write an es- say on “Journalism,” and the next day he handed in the following: “Journai- ism is the science of all sorts of jour- nals. There is a heap of kinds of jour- nals. Journals is good things ‘cept when they is hot journals, and then they is just awful. My ma, she takes‘a fashion journal what is always full of pictures of horrid old maids with the ugliest dresses gn I ever saw. fashion journal is a heap gooder than the hot journal, ‘cause the hot journal stops the train and the fashion jour- nal starts it. The fashion journal don’t stop nothin’ but the broken win- dow light and pa’s bank account. “There is sheep journals and hog | journals and brass journals, too, and pa has*got a journal down town at the | it about Then store and writes things in folks he don’t want to forget. | we had a woman ‘t cooked for us named She was the funniest She was a bald- Sally Journal. journal I ever saw. headed journal. “They ain’t no more journals that I know of. “Pp, S.—I forgot to say that a man what puts grease on the car wheels is called a journalist.” An Episcopal The Bishop of Gloucester and Bristol is reported as the latest cycling recruit in England. He has been seen astride a bicycle more than once in the neigh- borhood of Gloucester lately. This for an old man, in his seventy-eighth year, Dr. Ellicott, who is of a is well known also as an accomplished Alpine climber, skater and billiard player. Bicyclist, Bad Results of Vaccination, In a family living near Houtzdale, Pa., there is a seven-year-old child no larger than a five-months-old babe. The baby was vaccinated when it was five months old, and blood poisoning re- sulting, it has not grown a particle since. At Last. Jack—Hurrah, Mamie! We can get married now. Union stock is going up like lightning. Mamie—Oh, Jack! Have you some? Jack—No; but your father has.—New York- World. REFORM IN DINNER-CIVING, val The | THE CANAL OF JOSEPH. © &s°Usefak as:Ever at the: End of 4000 Years. How many’ of the.engineering works of the:nineteenth century will there be 4m existence in the: year 6000? Very few, we fear, and still less those that will continue in‘ the far-off ages te serve: a useful purpose. Yet there is at least one~ great undertaking conceived and executed by an engineer which dur- ing-the: space of 4,000 years has never ceased its office, on which the life of a fertile province absolutely depends to- day. We refer to the Bahr Joussuf— the canal of Joseph—built, according to tradition, by the son of Jacob, and which constitutes not the least of the many blessings he conferred on Egypt during the years of his prosperous rule. This canal took its rise from the Nile at Asiut, and ran almost parallel with it for nearly 250 miles, creeping along under the western cliffs of the Nile Valley, with many a bend and wind- ing, until at length it gained an emi- | nence, as compared with the river bed, which enabled it to turn westward through a narrow pass and enter a dfia- | trict which was otherwise shut off from the fertilizing floods on which all vege- | tation in Egypt depends. The northern end stood 17 feet above low Nile, while at the southern end it was at an equal | elevation with the river. Through this cut ran a perennial stream, which wat- ered a province named the Fayoum, en- dowing it with fertility and supporting a large population. In the time of the was under water, and then the river’s current would rush in a more direct \ course in the pass, carrying’ with it the rich silt which takes the place of manure and keeps the soil in a state of constant productiveness: All this, with the exception of the traditions that Joseph built it, can be verified to- | day, and it is not mere supposition or | rumor. Until eight years ago it was firmly believed that the design has al- ways been limited to an_ irrigation. scheme, larger, no doubt, than that now in operation, as shown by the traces of aband« ned canals and by the slow ag- gregation of waste water which had ac- cumulated in the Birket el Querun, but still easentially the same in character. Many accounts have been written by Greek and Roman historians, such as Herodotus, Strabo, Mutianus and Pliny and repeated in monkish legends or | portrayed in the maps of the Middle Ages, which agreed with the folklore of the district. These tales explained that the canal dug by the ancient Is- raelite served to carry the surplus wa- ters of the Nile into an extensive lake | lying south of the Fgyoum, and so large that it not only modified the climate, tempering the arid winds of the desert and converting them into the balmy airs which nourished the vines and the | olives into a fullness and fragrance un- known in any part of the country, but | also added to the foad supply of the | land such immense quantities of fish that the royal prerogative of the right of piscary at the great weir was valued at $250,000 annually. This lake was said to be 450 miles round, and to be navigated by a fleet of vessels, and the whole circumference was the scene of industry and prosperity.—Engincering. | You Can Have Your Eye Tattooed. The latest discovery of scientific medical men is that the human eye may be tattooed any color. It is now quite within the bounds of possibility for even doctors to tattoo a man's eye | bright scarlet or green. Of course, | eyes are tattooed only in cases wasre | one of them ‘s blind and has assumed in consequence a peculiar dead and | ghastly appearance. An eye in this condition will entirely disfigure a face, but a modern oculist may color one of these “dead” eyes and restore it to its natural appearance, so that nothing but the closest scrutiny can detect the difference between it and its fellow. The operation of tattooing is perform- | ed by first treating the eye with co- | | caine until it becomes absolutely sense- less to pain. When all is ready the part to be operated upon is covered thickly with India ink of the required color. The tattooing is then per- ‘ formed by means of a little electrical | machine which operates a specially | made needle.—Answers, The Diver's Heavy Dress. The dress of a fully equipped diver weighs 16914 pounds and costs about $500. It is made up, among other things, of 8% pounds of thick under- clothing. The dress itself weighs 14 pounds and the heavily weighted boots weigh 32 pounds. The breast and back pieces weigh 80 pounds and the hel- met 35 pounds. ‘he greatest depth at which a diver can ordinarily work is 150 feet. though there are rare in- stances of work heing done at:a depth of 210 feet, where the pressure sus- tained is 88% pounds to the square inch. It is not senerally known that suggested by the action of the ele- phant, which swims beneath the sur- face, breathing meanwhile through its trunk, which it bolds above the water. —New York Wortd Members of the Nansen expedition gay that so tired did they become of seeing the same faces and hearing the same voices day after day in the course of the slow drift northward that in the end a feeling of irritation be- came well nigh insuppartable. and the men would set off on long walks across the ice, each man by himself, and care- fully avoiding his fellows. |ing a sort of skeleton of the candle | white, with’ a tongue of yellow flame annual flood a great part’ of the canal |« the present system of diving was first | Oat of the World. EME ELEY & Flattering Them, Pe emai do you print your. biR ~ faro in French? Fashionable Res, fe euee paced I want my pat te think ‘that I think they can {t—Tit-Bits. A ato CLIMATE. A Candle Finds It Hard Work to Keep | " Warm in the Aretics. ! Cold is merely a relative term. The” resident of the semi-tropical countries, shivers when the thermometer falls to 50 degrees, while the Laplander and Es- | kimo think it is comfortable at zero. For real cold, and. plenty of it, on must go to the polar regions, Think of living where the mercury goes down to 36 degrees below zero in the house, in spite ofthe stove. Of course, in such a case, fur garments are piled on until a man looks like a great bundle of skins. Dr. Moss of the polar expe- dition. of 1875-76, among other things, i tells of the effect of cold on a wax candle which burned there. The tem- Perature was 35 degrees below zero, and the doctor must have been con- siderably discouraged when, looking at his eandle, he discovered that the flame had all it could do to keep warm. It was'so cold that the flame could not melt all the wax of the candle, but was forced to cut its way down, leav- standing. There was heat enough, however, to melt oddly-shaped holes in the thin walls of wax, and the result was a beautiful lace-like cylinder of burning inside of it and 6ending out into the darkness many streaks of light. The Cheertti fdtot. “J wonder if Maceo ‘3 really uvad:” said Mrs. Hashcrott, as she poured he coffee. “In view oi tie fact that uis physicien is said to have had a hand in the affair it looks as if it might be true.” said the Cheerful Idiot.—ladia- napolis Journal. Poor Girl. “Bob, listen.to this: ‘The oldest love letter in’ the world is 3,000 years old and is written on a brick.’” “S’pose the feller ‘threw his proposal at the girl’s head, the lly Slope BUY ™ BEST The “DOMESTIC” Is absolutely the best Sewing Machine made, Leads in latest and best improvements . SIMPLEw PRACTICAL * «DURABLE For over 30 years has been endorsed by the public as the most satisfactory of all sewing machines. We want your trade and can save you: money. Write for free catalogue and prices. THE DOMESTIC S$. M. CO, 298 Wabash Ave., Chicago. BEST LINE ST. PAUL MINNEAPOLIS ST.LOUIS. fh Pr VERYBODY 9 PAM PEE Che Only Free Silver ee Cartoon Paper ONE YEAR - - $1.00 TEN NUMBERS - .50 SUBSCRIBE AT On 24 pages Five cents. rom addzess | UP-TO-DATE, Chicage | Mentic this paper. —#k our capacety to do business. Prices the lowest. Clothing and GRAND RAPDS, Beckfelt Mather, : if General Merchandise =<. . * Lumbermen’s Supplies. Largely increased store room increases We always carry a -omplete line of the ‘test quality of goods en all departments. Dry Goods, Boots; Shoes. Groceries and Crockery. Hats and Caps. Furnishing Gods. THAN THE... - N Manufactured in Grand Rapids By ie iad! GEORGE BOOTH. for either of th | CAL stock used. BETTER CIGARS ARE MADE Pok gam Boquet ~Cup Defender an excellent smoke, e brands. and you will get None:but the. finest For the 5.9° above sum Broeker & Whiteaker are making as fine a suit as can be had in any city in the country for the money. Or, if you want something better, they can show you the finest line of samples ever brought into the county. Atany rate, give them a call before placing your order, They guarantee every garment they turn out in every way. BROEKER & WHITEAKER, Grand Rapids, Minn. S dcdedol gggeaguessenssaeassousscgenesssonscsees seeseeere 33 For full information address. ae 33 Northwestern Department Ss L. K. THOMPSON, an Manager. ce d. W, EARL, Superintendent Agencies soeeeesees. eae aa ae a a ae a eae REE RE SE EE AE ee A ea aa MINNEAPOLIS MIN. 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