Evening Star Newspaper, December 11, 1932, Page 4

FLECTION SATIRIZED IN GRIDIRON ACTS ‘Sketch on “New Deal” Set to Music Is High Spot of Annual Dinner. (Continued From Second Page.) back in 1632—just three turies ago —of the intrepid expk Pranklin van Roosevelt, with the L under Chief Curry of the Tammany wigwam, ror]Manhnun—And anything else he could The scene disclosed a wigwam on the stage and Chief Cufry, on hearing a cannon shot, remarked to the other Indians, including John McCooey and John P. O'Brien: “That shot came from the direction of Albany.” Previously the Indians had been in- formed that a strange Dutch ship was in the river, and as the orchestra be- gan the accompaniment of “The Dutch Cadets” from “The Bourgomaster,” the Indians huddled apprehensively and & band of explorers marched in singing: *Stand aside—We're Democrats. How our hearts rejoice. Bosses and aristocrats Hearken to our voice. We bring something new to you— Underneath our hats. Though we don't know just what we'll do, ‘We are the Democr The leader of the explorers exclaimed: *1 am Franklin van Roosevelt, and this is the Democratic East, West, North and South Exploration Company. We're exploring the country to find out what it is all abous” Ship “Half-and-Half.” Asked by McCooey if they came in Hudson’s ship, the “Half Moon,” then Roosevelt replies: “No, we came in our own ship, the ‘Half-and-Half'” Chief Curry, intrigued by the name, learns from van Roosevelt: “The ship was named after an old Democratic custom. Half of us want to do one thing, and half another.” To this McCooey retorts: “Just like us Indians—half of us wanted Smith, and the other half didn’t want Smith—and look what we got.” ‘Then van Roosevelt presented some of the ship’s company: Admiral James van Farley, Commodore Bernard van Baruch, Able Seaman Hiram van John- gm and Bosn Louis McHenry van owe. McCooey remarked: “I've heard of your cousin, Theodore van Roosevelt, Jr.” to which van Roosevelt retorted: “You won’t hear any more.” Van Roosevelt announced he in- tended to take possession of the en- tire continent, but Curry insisted he could not hawe Manhattan without the Indians’ consent. Curry said he wasthe chief and this was the Tammany wig- the five tribes ,” said van Farley, “the five tribes—the Mohawks, Onlnflll‘l» Onei- das, Cayugas and Senecas.” “No,” replied Curry, “—the Murphys, Olvaneys, McCooeys, Currys and O'Brlem . For Manhattan Explorer van Roose- velt offered to trade “the finest line of cam| promises you ever saw.” He ited & hmdml of glass bead neck- lacks and other ornaments to the In- dians, a3 50 many campaign prmhec “a farm without s mortgage, & without a note, a bank ithout & frozen asset and & home without s worry.” “Firewater” Is Exzhibited. ‘The Indians were visibly impressed, but still not satisfled until van Roosevelt offered a promise of “repeal” and ex- hibited a bottle of “firewater.” “The country is yours,” Curry finally A Imeuw-mmn, “Away Down South,” showed a group of deserving man and woman Democrats back at the old homestead, which turned out to be the Nation’s Capital on March 4, 1933. “Hooey” Long finds a mortgage ln‘n the old homestead of “twenty bil- “Why, that’s almost what it was when we were here before with Cousin ‘Woodrow,” remarked Col. Julep, who said, mortgage or no mortgage, “it's great to be home.” To Julep’s admission he desired to be It only seems so in Secretary of Agriculture, Aunt Dixie retorted he didn’t even know the price of corn. “On the contrary, madam,” replied the old Southron, “I can tell you pre- cisely. The price of the best corn is $5 a gallon.” Uncle Yarner came on the scene with an attendant, who said his patient was forbidden by order of Dr. Farley to use his vocal cords save in certain locali- ties. Learning this was Washington, the attendant said: “Sorry, no go. Dr. Farley’s orders forbid Mr. Yarner's using his voice in New England, New York, the Middle ‘West and the City of Washington.” “Hooey” Long suggested playing E:t office, whereat Yarner became vio- ntly exciled and had to be led away. “That word, post office just sets him erazy,” the attendant explained. riffa, s fat girl, entered shrieking. “That awful Pat Harrison,” complained, “sald he was going to knock my Smoot off.” Julep thought she would look better with it off. Concern of Tariffa. Tariffa became concerned about her parentage, demanding to know from Aunt Dixie who her father was. She was told of & rumor that & man named Alexander Hamilton was her sire, but there was some vagueness as to his identity. Finally it was left to Cousin Al who entered, but did not explain, but said, instead, in & perfect Third avenue Southern accent: “How I love the dear Old South- land, just like I love Cousin Franklin. Ah, here I see my beautiful ward, Tariffa. ‘This is your Uncle Al who took you up at Houston and made you respectable in our family.” Tariffa complained of & “pain in my ad valorem.” Aunt Dixie consoled her with the in- formation a “nice doctor from Albany” was going to glve her “some pui.nleu reducing pills. Tarifla lamented, but Cousin Al “Now let's look on the record. our Uncle Franklin says he's going to re- duce you so as not to hurt anybody, and if anybody can perform that feat it's one who could carry 42 States ‘without—" Just then a moving man rushed in with orders from “your Uncle Prank- ot of them useless But Uncle Julep marshalled the fam- y. “Go back,” he sald, “and tell Uncle FPranklin you ran right into the solid BSouth and busted your fool heads. Ladies and gentlemen, in the name of our dear Southland’s beauty and chiv- alry, let’s protect the bureaus and give these reformers the bums’ rush.” Humor in Serious Problems. Two of the most urgent problems be- fore Congress, namely prohibition and international debts, were found not to be without their humorous facets, as * inhrwmd by members of the c!ub for example, presented * Iu-ch-nz of Venice’ one of the first yl on debt u.nce!.hnon ever written Englishman.” The European in- m of Uncle snm a5 s&vlocl Omt&'l “"‘m £ ‘Historic Parody Hoover's “Grass” Speech Put to Song by Gridiron Quartet. “The Green Grass Grew All Around.” | Club quartet, clad in ‘The G overalls and pushing lawnmowers, came upon the stage as a club member an- nounced: “We turn to Madison re Garden for a brief review of an lc inci~ dent of the late 'unpleasantness.” ‘The quartet thereupon sang to the tune of “The Green Grass Grew All Around”: “He made a little speech and he put it in the mike And the green gras grew all around, round, round And the green grass grew all around.” Shifting to the air of “The Monkey Said to Chimpanzee,” the songsters continued: “The candidate said to the voters all And the candidate surely should know If Democrats pass that tariff bill In the streets green grass will grow. “In the streets green grass will grow, In the streets green grass will grow, 1t the Democrats pass that tariff bill In the streets green grass will grow. “Now the voters pondered the words he spoke And u-mh- eyes had a merry glint For Lhey dreamed of sidewalks sprout- ing he And the .m—m.s all growing mint. “So we give you the toast of the men who mow As we blow the foam from the gls.ss No street shall now be a thoroughfare, So please keep off the grass. So please keep off the grass, 'So please keep off the grass; No street shall now be a thoroughhre, So please keep off the grass.” ——————— picted as the three suitors in the fa-| mous casket scene. Said Portia: | “Behold, there stands the caskets, no- ble creditors. If you chose that wherein's contained my likeness on a dollar Shail straight your war debts be ab- solved. But if you fall, without one more speech, fair Europeans, You must come across immediately. ‘Who shall choose first?” In turn the debtors chose the cas- kets, Britain, recoiling from the gold, picks the silver casket. He found in it a picture of Ogden Mills, reminding him that the debts are to be paid De- cember 15. Then Prance picked the gold casket only to discover a champagne bome with a label, “made in Californ: Belgium turned the leaden casket, all that was left, and extracted from it & tariff speech of Charles Curtis, asking b‘? embargo against “Texas Jackrab- te.” France expressed the fear to Britain they must pay “these war ducats to him who's most aptly dubbed Uncle Shylock.” And Britain agreed: “‘We cannot forfeit lest we never get another loan.” TUncle Shylock entered exclaiming: “To have my debts I've taken an oath Prmmvnnlybldahxmhnrth but he launched upon his own griev- ances: “I heard all the campaign speeches; now I'll have my debts. Mmmkmmm,nmundm' I'll not be made a soft and dull-eyed To shake the head, relent, and sign and yield To lurvpean spendthrifts. Many & time and oft At Lausanne you have rated me About my mmln and my usuances. Still have I borne it with a patient Yt:\llrcun‘lled me dollar-chaser, cut-throat, e upon my tourists, deride my R-uln my commerce, scrap «my battle- Bhnn T bend low and in & bondman’s Wlth bated breath and whispering hum- bleness, Say this: P:.loll-_lsl.r ywseluduponmymnrp Called it cu.ncelkuou another day, At Lausanne you did conspire, in ‘Gentlemen’s agreement,’ to put me on the spot. I want my debts; they hired the ducats didn’t they? T've taken an oath in Congress.” Portia’s Gentle Plea. Bidding Uncle Shylock be merciful, the gentle Portia made this plea: “The quality of mercy is not strained, presidential cam- paign years. It droppeth 8 the gentle rain from heaven Upon platform p! It is twice blm E) candidates. You eth both party ‘Therefore, Shylock, thauxh collection be thy plea, consider t! 'rhn m the course of couecuon, none Shlll see full payment. ‘We do pray against repudiation An'g tr).;lt same prayer doth teach us all We %r:rbnbly won't get ten cents on the shylock demanded his ducats, but Portia wamed him: “Yet, mark you, Shylock, In the collection of these" debts, Sl:led not one penny of the prl\'lte' ebf Our international bankers have in Ger- | Nmny by the weight of a hafr th jor vary wel of a Other loans i Sold at bidding of Department of Com- | merce and Franklin Roosevelt’s bond bouse; Nurr take one-twentieth part of a scruple rom All the trade and riches promised us By Democnnc orator and Republican promiser; Yet mg "Take not one whit of lfe from Bill Borah’s Conferences for disarmament, Nor Key Pittman’s boosting of the price of silver.” Shylock remonstrated it was not written in the bond nor in the plat- forms. Convinced at last. he asserted | he was “only chasing rainbows,” doffed | his shabby brown cowl and revealed himself in his true guise as Santa Cllus “Come, let’s all go to Geneva,” he bubbled, ‘and the cast el the stage to the tune of “Jingle Bells." One of the most elaborate musical numbers of the evening was entitled “The Retreat from Moscow.” About Gens. Smoot and Fess were gathered | mileage and go home. THE SUNDAY STAR, WASHINGTON, D, C., DECEMBER 11, --re'u'm, teasing, I was only teasing Teuxng‘ uuinu Just to see what you would do. Of course, you knew that T was Teasing, teasing, to find out what the wets would do, Don't be angry, I was only, only teasing you." Gen Fess discovered “under a bush” none other than “our great master of tactics, the Indiana intelligence officer, Everett Sanders,” who woefully seized the opportunity to burst into this song: “I was wrong a hundred per cent, In a million ways. 1 was wrong a hundred per cent, And that's a lot these days.” “Hawkshaw the decectl\e in the person of George Higgins Moses of New Hamnpshire, was told by Gen. Smoot that his wise-cracking had not done the Republican party much good, so it was time he got serious like Smoot. Smoot suggested they cash in their All would be back he said, and maybe the Emperor hl;réuu would return from Elba in 1936. A scene in the “beer clinic,” the setting for which very much resem- bled the Supreme Court, showed the possible complications resultant to the amendment of the Volstead act so as to permit 3 per cent beer. The nine pathologists in the dignity of their black robes, sat on the case while leaders prominent on both sides of the wet and dry question presented musical testimony as to the innocuous or intoxicating qualities of the about- to-be-legalized beverage. Dr. Copeland sent in his guinea pig to be tried with an injection of the beer to determine whether its alco- holic content was too high for the citizenry. After the pig got his shot of beer Dr. Hiram Bingham sang: “That beer is beer, is plain as plain can be, Take foam from beer, you might as well drink tea, Take gin from ginger ale and you will find, The courts will hold that you have lost your mind. Take Ioam from beer, take foam from Take foam from beer, take gin from ginger-ale and you will find, The courts will hold that you have lost your mind.” The custodian of the beer keg rep- resented Dr. William E. Borah as be- numg “that alcohol is a narcotic pol- Dr Borah then gave his own evi- dence in song. “With a sense of deep emotion, I approach this painful case, For I never had a notion, That the wets should win the race, Or that dries would be dividing, Prohibition now deriding. Asked as to the condition of the pig, the chief pathologist reported that the exhibit was “animated but not uproar- 1011! jovial but not jubilant, twittering & trifie but not tight. The heart ac- tion is accelerated and I think—I think he is beginning to hum a little?” Dr. Morris Sheppard dressed in tra- ditional Prohibitionist garb interrupt- ed the session of the court to tell of the evils of cocktails and beer and concluded with the heart-rending, R-E-M-O-R-8-E. “The water wagon is the place for me, At 9 am. T feel immense, That's why I favor total abstinence. The eyes are bleared, the head is hot, If it's two-seven-five or if it's not, This is no time for mirth and laughter.” And the ominous warning, “Remember— The cold gray dawn of the morning after.” Bootlegger's Child. Dr. Fred Britten' of Illinois intro- duced the pitiful case of the bootleg- | ger’s child, whose woes were reiterated by the chorus: “She’s only a bootlegger's daughter, yet i =h}e] has a nglx;; to live, elping her daddy by peddling his rum, Hoping that pity will give. Out in the wildest of weather, garbed in an old tattered shawl, Starving and chilled, soon her pulse will be stilled, She's & victim of progress—that’ all.” The chief pathologist then called upon his colleagues to render their ver- dict on the condition of the pig. The members of the awesome body came to some very different conclusions about the exhibit’s alcoholic state. # “He’s curling up upon his shelf, He's singing softly to himself, He seems to be a little weepy, Go on! He's just a little sleepy, His glance is bright, His tongue is hot, I'd say he's tight. I'd say he's not.” The final decision was, “Gentlemen, the verdict is: The pig is just having a good time.” The trigl was concluded by the bar- aproned chorus singing: “For there comes a night, when we all get tight, And the water wagon is a_ lonesome ght, Nobody cares whether Bheppard swears, Nobody cares how the Woodcock fares, ‘We'll all relax as we pay the tax, And we'll all forget Carrie Nation's ax, ‘There comcs & night when we'll all get And Iu be glad when it comes, won't you? Members representing SBenator Nor- ris of Nebraska, Johnson of California, La Follette of Wisconsin, and Cutting of New Mexico, all garbed as little boys, lppefired in a brief travesty, entitled “The Four Horsemen of the Ava- lanche.” Johnson wohdered what they got when they “hopped off the elephant and climbed on the donkey.” La Fol- | lette opined that if they were shorn of their “nice committee chairmanships” they might wish they had “stayed reg- ular.” Norris wondered if the Demo- crats would help them when the time came to run again. There entered then a character representing former Sena- tor Heflin of Alabama, & small boy with & pillow strapped behind him. Said he to the four horsemen: “How do I know? Say, when I ran away in 1928 it cost me the licking of my young life. I ain't over it yet. Old Auntie Democracy spanked me something awful. But that’s nothin’ to what Grandma G. O. P. is going to do to you. Go on, ride your little hobbies as long as you can. You may think you're on horseback still, but you progressives ain’t in the saddle no more. Yah, yah, yah.” Family Relations Explained. Prof. Ignatius Flapdoodle Bunk, im- ported from Harvard, endeavored, by the aid of pointer and diagram, to ex- a disconsolate group, attired as survivors | Plain the intricate relationship of the of Napoleon’s famous retreat, in tatter- | Roosevelt family, bringing them down, ed uniforms and with torn flags and | broken guns. The chorus wailed: “Where do we go from here, boys, Where do we go from here? Anywhere from Kansas to another hemisphere. The G. O. P. is off the track, We need an_engineer, Oh, boys; oh, boys; where do we go from here?” Gen. Fess gave a report from Corpl. Coolidge !hnt. they had been “driven from Massachusetts with 60,000 Re- publicans lost.” Corpl. Couzens had “ducked into a trench and when he came out M(chlgm was $125,000 to the bad.” The desertion of Trumpeter Hiram Johnson to McAdoo in California and the turning over of 400,000 of our troops to McAdoo” elicited groans, Fess commented that “saddest of all, rock-bound Iowa, birthplace of our noble emperor, left him 130,000 in the lurch.” Gen. Smoot deplored that Field Marshal “Jim” Watson “fought on the banks of the Wabash once too often and lost his shirt. Give him a cheer.” Report to Gen. Smoot. An orderly reported to Gen. Smoot a straggler in the ranks, saying: “He isn't a member of the G. O. P., with how he didn't fight us generation after generation to an im- passe where “Theodore fled to the Phil- ippines while Franklin flew to Chi- cago.” ‘The club member to whom the ex- planation was made complained he was “getting all mixed up.” The professor's rejoinder was: “Youre not half as mixed as the social relationships of the Roosevelts are going to be during the next four years.” “Horatius Sanders” in 8 phrase | Co! of “Horatius at the Bridge” lauded the six States that proved loyal to Presi- dent Hoover in the campaign. Each State was represented 2 Roman warrior, and each was tolled. Sanders’ exordium was: “When the oldest cask is opened And the largest lamp is lit; When ;he chesmuu glow—on the diron— And political shadows Of these six States which klpt the faith Still the story will be told, With Horatius Sanders at the breach = In the brave days of old.” A club announcer expressed the de- sire to introduce two distinguished guests. John N. Garner, spunr of the House when name mm- bow, AM‘“%M ¢ w the Vice President-elect ited States, and Mr. Gamer “Thén upon the stage ensued a topleal duet between the and President-elect as 'o his conduct after March 4. The latter, as a two-gun man, admitted fire & shot in the campaign. Unlike “Charlie Curtis,” he said, he would “take my meals at home” when vlu President. He hoped be would be mitted to sleep and not be ai gresldlng officer of the Senate, if there appened to be & vote on the sales tax. Asked whether, as a friend of Hearst, he would favor McAdoo in the Senate, the Garner-to-be replied: “I will treat them all as eqt except the G. 0. P” In another skit so-called hunger marchers were seeking the le counter” and demanding “jobs, jobs, jobs.” They proceeded to “gas” with insect spra; a couple of holdouts from the bufld- ing in which they were ensconsced. Their victims turned out to be Secre- tary of War Hurley and Gen. McArthur, who figured in the eviction of the bonus army last Summer. At another period in the dinner “Prof. Albert Einstein” asked an Amerl- can consul to vise his passport America. He asserted he was neoded to use algebra, plane and fancy geometry, differential calculus and.the fourth dimension to help the United States to balance its budget. Te- puted Communist was asked by the consul if he approved the American form of government and replied: “I was not in favor of it before No- vember 8, but Mr. Ogden Mills' speeches convinced me this Government was go- ing Comum:t and I want to be in the fashion.” ‘Whereupon, it was decided that Ein- stein_after all was only a Democrat and he was promptly admitted. Guests at Dinner. Those attending the dinner were: The President of the United States. The Chief Justice of the Supreme Court. The Speaker of the House of Repre- sentatives, The Secretary of State. ‘The Ambassador of France. Ambassador of Germany. Ambassador of Great Britain. Ambassador of Belgium, The Ambassador of Cuba. Secretary of the Treasury. ‘The Secretary of War. ‘The Attorney General. The Postmaster General. The Secretary of the Navy. The Secretary of Interior, The Secretary of iculture, The Secretary of Commerce. o Minister from Carl E. Adams, New York City; Eugene G. Adams, Phelps H. Adams, the New York Sun; Dr. Roy Adams, George Akerson, New York City; Theo- dore C. Alford, the Kansas City Star; handler P. Anderson, Matthew C. immmnz, Hampton, Va.; Robert B. Armstrong, Los Ancelu Times; A. Y. Aronson, Louisville, Ky.: Herbert S Auerback, Salt Lake City; Floyd & Awalt and M. H. Aylesworth. Representative Isaac Bachrach, New Jersey; Bruce Baird, Elbert H. Baker, the Cleveland Plain Dealer; Raymond T. Baker, Representative Malcolm Bal- dridge, Nebraska; Arthur A, Ballentine, Undersecretary of Treasury; Robert Barry, Bernard M. Baruch, New York City; Dr. Robert S. Beale, Edward 8. Beck, the Chicago 'n-lbm MzMn Beh- rends, Ulric Bell, Courier- Journal; Paul Belhmy the Cleveland Plain Dealer; Robert J. Bender, the United Press; Ira E. Bennett, Wash- ington Post; C. K. Berryman, The ‘Washi Evening star; Karl A. Bickel, the United Press; Senator Hiram Bingham, Connecticut; Paul Block, the Paul Block Newspapers; ME resentative Sol Bloom from New York; John 8. Blue, Canton, Ohio; John Boettiger, the Chicago Tribune; Mer- ritt Bond, North American Newspaper Alliance; Dr. Joel T. Boone, United P. Brandt, the St. Louis Post-Dispatch Capt. Taylor Branson, U. S, Band; Harold Brayman, the New York Evening Post; Dr. Paris E. Brengle, R. C. gfl‘lfl. Ashmun_Brown, Provi- dence Journal; Maj, E. M. Brown, End- 1}5" c‘wumn&' 1d; Harry rown, n Heral J. Brown, Salt Lake Tribune; Sevellon Brown, the Providence Journal; Ed- mund Bruce, San Francisco, Calif.; H. E. C. Bryant, Asheville Citizen; Gene Buck, New York City; E. A. Buel, Balti- Walker S. Buel, Cleveland Eliot Buffinton, New York City; Senator Robert J. Bulkley, Ohio; Rev, John J, Burke, Harry C. Butcher, Harry Flood Byrd, former Governor of Virginia, and Senator James F. Byrnes, South Carolina. Louis G. Caldwell; Floyd L. Carlisle, New York City; James E. Carson, Mi-|w; ami, Fla.; A. C. Case; Robert Cassels, New York City; Louis S. Cates, New York City; Tom Cathcart, the Country Home, New York; Willlam M. Chad- bourne; C. M. M. Chester, New York City; G. Bowie Chlpmln Robert B. Choate, the Boston Herald; 'Representative Rob- ert H. Clancy, Michigan; Raymond Clapper, the United Press; Edward B. Clark; E. T. Clark, Washington, D. C.; Allen’ Cleaton the Times-Dispatch, Richmond, Vi Frank D. Comerford, Boston, Mass.; Senator Royal S. Cope- land, New York; Wiliam S. Corby, Chevy Chase, Md.; John F. Costello, Democratic national committeeman from the District of Columbla; Edward Costigan; Dr. James F. Coupal; Frank Couzens, Detroit; Senator James Couz- ens, Michigan; Gardner Cowles, Recon- struction Finance Corporation; W. B. Craig, Bulletin, Philadelphia, Pa.; Harry M. Crandall; Marvin H. Creager, the Milwaukee Journal; Harris M. Crist, Brooklyn Daily Eagle; John C. Cmcke R. J. Cuddihy, the Literary . Hugh §. Cumming, Burleun Geneu! Public Health Service; J. Harry Cunningham, Cheyy Chase, Md.; Le- land W. Cutler, New York City. Others in Attendance. Neil Dalton, Louisville, Ky.; George Davis, Kansas- City, Mo.; George De- Keim, Edgewater Beach, N. J.; Charles H. Dennis, the Chicago Daily News; Col. Prederick L. Devereux, New York | ham; City; Prederick L. Devereux, jr, New York City; Henry L. Doherty, New York City; Emmet Dougherty; Repre- sentative Lewis W. Douglas from Mas- sachusetts; Arthur S. Draper, the New York Herald-Tribune; Pont, Wilmington, Del. Stephen T. Early; Fred East; Martin Egan, New York City; Howard Ellis, Chicago, Ill; Richard P. Ernst, Cov- ington, Ky.; Milton H. Esberg, San Francisco, Calif.; J. Fred Essary, Bal- timore Sun; Ray D. Everson, the In- dianapolis News; Charles E. Ewing, Chicago, Il Walter J. Fahy, New York City; E. Barry Faris, New York City; James A. Farley, chairman Democratic National Committee; George R. Fearon, State Senator, New York; Maj. Matthew C. Fenton, Baltimore, Md.; Senator Sim- eon D. Fess, Ohio; Carter Field, the Bell Syndicate; Richard L. Field, the New York Herald-Tribune; A. Lincoln Filene, Boston, Mass.; George E. Flem- ing; Robert V. Fleming; L. M. Flesh, Piqua, Ohio; Mark Foote, Grand Rap- ids Press; Rudolph Forster; Col. R. L. Foster, U. S. A.; Logan A. Piqua, Ohio; 1. F. Freiberger, Cleve- land, Ohio; E. L. Fugel; Maj. Gen. Ben H l?uller. commandant U. 8. Marine Plerre 8. du George Rothwell Buneun Gridiron Heads Charles G. Ross (upper), who was elected president of the Gridiron Club yesterday, and Walker 8. Buell, retiring g{uidgnt, who presided at last night’s nner. Henry Hall; Col. Edwin A. Halsey; Clarence C. Hamlin, Colorado Springs; Victor H. Hanson, the Birmingham News; James G. Harbard, major general, U. S. A, retired; John F. Harris, Repre- sentative, national committeeman from Florida; Senator Pat Harrison, Missis- : llvpl Roland H. Harrison, the Christian fence Monitor; Walter' M. Harrison, the Oklahoman, Oklahoma City; Dow Harter, congressman-elect, Ohio; Nel- son T. Harrison; Senator Harry B. Hawes, Missouri; Russel Hawkins, Port- land, Oreg; Jay G. Hayden, Detroit News; Willlam R. Hearst, jr, the New York American; Lewis J. Heath, the United Press; 'Guy C. Helver- Democratic _State chairman of ; M. E. Hennessy, the Boston | Q. Globe; Arthur 8, Henning, Chicago Tri- bune; John Herrick, the Chicago Tri- bune; George W. Hess, superintendent United States Botanic Garden; Dr.,D. Percy Hickling; Frank Hight; Charles D. Hilles, Representative, national com- mitteeman from New York; itchcock, cson, Ariz.; Curtis A. Hodges; Paul Hodges, the Cleveland Plain Dealer; Frank J. Hogan; Dr. J. J. Hogan, Vallejo, Calif.; Q. S. Holden, the Cleveland Plain Dealer; George R. Holmes, International News Service; Walter Ewing Hope, New York City: Fred E. Hornaday, the American Forests Magazine; James P. Hornaday, the In- dianapolis News; George A. Horton, New York City: H. Lindley Hosford, St. Paul, ; Hilleary G. Hoskinson; Harrison E. Howe, xndumm Chemistry Maga- zine; Louis M. Howe, New York Ctty. Edward N. Hurley, Chicago, IiL; P Hutton, New York City; Henry Hyd: the Evening Sun, Baltimore, Md. ‘harlés Issael, the Philadelphia Ernest Lee Jahncke, Assistant Secre- tory of Navy; E. L. James, the New York Times; Frank R. Jellefl; W. W. Jermane, Seattle Times; Richard Jer- vis; Edmund F. Jewell, the Washing- ton Herald; Arthur C. Johnson, sr., Columbus, Ohio; Phlhnder ©. John- son, Washington Evening Star; Jesse H. Jones, Reconstruction Finance Cor- poration, and Theodore G. Joslin, sec- retary to the President. Hans V. Kaltenborn, Brooklyn, N. Y.; Walter Karig, the Newark Eve- ning News; R. M. Kauffmann, The Washington Evening Star; Victor Kauffmann, The Washington Evening Star; D.J. Kaufman; Senator Hamilton F. Kean, N. J.; Neil Kelly; Judge Daniel J. Kenefick, Buffalo, N. Y.; Joseph P. Kennedy, New York City; Frank R. Kent, the Sun, Baltimore, Md.; Col J. Miller Kenyon; Kenneth Kerney; Charles P. Keyser, St. Louis Globe- Democrat; Willls G. C. Kimball, Wo- burn, Mass.; A. H. Kirckhofer, Buffalo Evening Newa, Col. Frank Knox, the Chicago News Dr. Parke R. Kolbe, P’hflndelphll. 8. S. Kresge, Miami, Fla., and Arthur Krock, The New York Times. Lynne M. Lamm; Robert R. Lane, Newark Evening News; Maj. E. Brook Lee, Silver Spring, Md.; Arthur Leh- man, New York City; Rudolf Leitner, counselor of German embassy; George A. Lewis; Sir Willmott Lewis, the Lon- don Times; Charles P. Light; G. Gould Lincoln, Washington Evening Star; Allen L. Lindley, vice president, New York Stock Exchange; Ernest K. Lind- ley, New York City; Thomas P. Little- "fi' Henry F. Long, Boston, Mass.; Willam R. Lynett the Scranton Times, and G. A. Lyon, The Washington Star. Included In List, Clifford F. MacEvoy, Newark, N. J.; H. Edmund l‘lclmld New York City; Leod, Providence, R. Mapel, Lexington, Va.; Edgar Mark- John C. Martin, the Public Ledxfl, Philadelphia; L. Randolph Mason, New York City; Rev. Edward P. McAdams; Florence McAuliffe, San Francisco, Calif.; Joseph J. McAuliffe, the St. Louis Globe-Democrat; Dr. Lee McCarthy; Wilson McCarthy, Recon- struction Finance Corporation; J. F. McClelland, New York City; Col. Mar- vin H. Mclntyre; Willlam Meclntire, Philadelphia, Pa.;' Guy D. McKinney, the Chicago Tribunte; William J. Mc- Nally, Chevy Chase, Md.; John C. Meikle; Bradford M. Melvln, San Fran- cisco, Calif.; Lowell Mellett, the Wash- ington News; Herbert R. Mengert, the Cincinnati Enquirer; Charles Michel- son; Jeremiah Milbank, New York City; Representative Jacob L. Milligan, Mo.;- James S. Milloy, the Minneapo- lis Tribune; Dr. Prancis H. Miner; Dr. James F. Mitchell; Raymond I. Moley, New York City; Francis Monroe, Cleve- land, Ohio; E. E. Moore, New York City; Willlam H. Moran; Admiral Casey B. Morgan, New York City; Charles M. Morrison, the Public Ledger, Phila- delphia, Pa.; Maxey Neal Mornsun Phl.hdelphl.l. Pa.; Herndon Morsell; Tudor Morsell; ' Sedator George - Moses, New Hampshire; Arthur F. Mul- len, Nebr.. and Dr. Joseph J. Mundell, U. Mo. Bdwl.n W. Gableman, Cincinnati En- | Newton, ui ichael City; ‘Fred qu Gauntlett, Chevy Chase, y;’ . Gauntlett, Md.; John P. Gavit, New York Oity; Archer Gibson, New York City; Clinton bert P. Gilmore, Christian Science anwr W. 8. Gil- more, the Detroit Ne: J. Gockeler; J. L. Goodbody, New York City. ln.rk L. Goodwin, Dallas News; o.h&m Bufl'lln, N. ¥.; Ira M. Ornburn, Tariff Commissioner; Vermn G. Oweu and Junior Owens. Alfred Palmer, A. Mitchell Palmer, H. C. lealee. llcflnw»nnl Publish- ._Prederick J. Pumw, 'IQM!- 1932—PART O New York City Gmg Pat- terson, the Toledo Blade; Pat terson, Bun, Baltimore, Md.; Col. Richard C. Patterson, New York City; g. D. Fargo the Chicago Ben? I New York clt.y, John Perlhl.n: eral United States Armies (!’flh;;;, Plerce, New Y e ity ew Yorl New York cuy John Garland Pollard, kflnh Atlee Pumtame. S. Prall, Reprmnu ve from e e ot Temes D, o Dl He Mln'xl\‘elm nn esentative Henry b - W Willlam F. Raymond, Roland L. New York City; Senator Reed, Pennsylvania; A. P. Reeves, wmum A. Reid, Charles A. Reynolds, Brooklyn Daily Eagle; Maj. James suwm Richardson, - New ; Lawrence Richey, Secre- to the President; Edgar Rickard, New York City; Albert C. Ritchie, Gov- d; B. H. Roberts, Roy Marc A. Rose, ess York; Charles G. Ross, St. Louis Post- Dispatch; Louls Ruppel, New York City; H. L. Rust, Carl D. Ruth, Toledo Blade; John P. Ryan, New York City, and William C. Ryan, New York City. Leo Sack, The Pittsburgh Press; Everett Sanders, Chairman Eepublle-n National Committee; David Sarnoff, New York City; Frederick A. Savage, Baltimore, Md.; James T. Scarry, The Newark Evening News; Alfred H. Schoenkopf, Buffalo, N. Y.; Senator Karl C. Schuyler, Colorado; William E. Scripps, the Detroit News; Harry H. Semmes, Whitney North Seymour, Sen~ ator Morris Sheppard, Texas; Paul Shoup, New York City; Jouett Shouse, E. H. H. Simmons, New York City; Ar- thur J. Sinnott, Newark Evening News; Anthony J. Sircusa, New Jersey Assem- bly; Francis H. 8isson, New York City; Ray L. Skofleld, Santa Barbara, Calif.; C. Bascom_ Slemp, Charles Gaston Smith, jr., Boston, Mass.; John Lewis Smith, Robert B. Smith, Philadelphia Public Ledger; Senator Reed Smoot, Utah; H. P. Somerville; Representative Bertrand H. Snell, New York; John Snure, Des Moines Refll'cl' Edward C. Snyder, United States marshal; William H. Stayton, captain, U. 8. N. (retired); E. C. Steffe, Gen. W. W. Btex'lhw com- mander of the Texas Ral G. Harry Stetson, Los Angeles, C liam M. Steuart, M. Harry stevms Al- fred J. Stofer, Birmingham News; Lewis L. Strauss, New York City; French Strother, secretary to the President; James A. Sullivan, Mark Sullivan, jr.; Mark Sullivan, New York Herald- Tribune; Thomas V. Sullivan, N Ohio; W. D. Sullivan, the Boston Globe: John T. Suter, the Associated Press; Henry suydnm, Brooklyn Daily Eagle; Conrad H. Syme, Sao-Ke Alfred Sze. Charles F. Taplin, Cleveland, Ohlo. william H. Taylor, Philadelphia, . F. J. F. Thiel; Mark Thistlewsite, fl Journal - Gazette; erick, Mfl Elliott T. Thurston, delphia Record; Representative John Tilson, Comnecticut; Represent.mve George Holden Tinkham, from Massa- chusetts; Charles T. Tittmann, Wash- ington, D. C.; Representative Allen T. Treadway, from Massachusetts; Arthur R. Treanor, the Saginaw News, Sagl- naw, Mich; Harold W. Tucker, Provi- .| dence, R. I; Ray T. Tucker, the New .| York Telegram; Joseph P. Tumulty, Dr. ‘W. D. Tewksbury. F. D. Underlood New York City. Senator _Arthur H. Vandenberg, Michigan; Earl Venable, Leroy T. Ver- non, the Chic2go Daily News; Fred C. Vincent, Kansas City, Mo. George R. Wales, civil service com- missioner; Ernest G. Walker, Frank Walker, treasurer, Democratic National Committee; Theodore C. Wallen, the New York Herald-Tribune; Edward J. Walsh, Gerald A, Walsh, Blfil L. ‘Wal- ters, the Register-Trithine, Des Motnes, Iowa; Charles Warren, Semtm' James E. Watson, Indiana; W. W. Waymack, the Des Moines Register-Tribune; Sin- clair Weeks, Boston, Mass.; Paul Weir, the Associated Press; Herbert Wellington, New York City; Vernon E. West, Franklin G. Wetherell, Takoma Park Md.; John N. Wheeler, North American Newspaper Alliance; Law- rence Whiting, Chicago, Ill.; Richard Whitney, president, New York Stock Exchange; Daniel Willard, president, Baltimore & Ohio R. R.; Grafton 8./ resulf Wilcox, New York Herald-Tribune; George H. Wilson, Harry H. Woodring, Governor of Kansas; Robert W. ‘Wooley, Dr. Hubert Work, Denver, Colo.; Carle- ton H. Wright, commander, U. 8. N.; James L. Wright, the Buffalo Evenm; News; W. E. Wright, Toledo, Ohio; Les- ter E. Wurfel, Newark, N. J. Henry Xander. Caspar S. Yost, the St. Louis Globe- Democrat. Dentists to Meet Tuesday. Dr. Irving R. Hardy of New York will be the principal lgelker before the reg- ular meeting of the District of Colum- bia Dental Society Tuesday night at 8 o'clock in George Washington Univer- sity. His subject will be “Aids to Es- thetic Denture Construction.” —_— Hungary's customs war with Austria last Summer is reported to have em- barrassed trade in Hungary. %[, OF . TAKESVOTE ! ON RESERVE BANKS Questions of Regulation Rec- ommended by Committee to Be Decided. By the Associated Press. Reserve permitted to maintain lmlhh eorpo- rations to deal in securities. Additional leluuln. Referenda on this and related ques- tions was in addition to the one an- nounced earlier yesterday, dealing ex- clusively with Federal legislation on btsnch and group banking. The com- ttee recommended on that topic that t‘Eullmm of group banking be under- en and that national banks of pre- scribed size be authorized to operate intrastate branches. In the later referendum were sub- mitted the convictions of the Banking Committee that the Glass-Steagall act provision for issuance of Federal Re- serve notes against 40 per cent gold and the balance in Federal securities should be continued; that the emer- gency power given Reserve banks for direct loans to business enterprises should be repealed and that legislation should be enacted requiring early re- tirement of national bank currency is- sued against Government bonds. Special Agency Advocated. It was also advocated that a special agency of the Government be set up— with capital supplied by the Govern- ment, Reserve and member banks—to leuldnu closed member banks and make possible early dividends to their depositors. A capital minimum for national banks hereafter organized or for State banks admitted to Reserve member- ship of $100,000 was recommended, ex- cept that with specific approval banks in towns of 6,000 or less could come in_with $50,000 capital. ‘Other proj ls dealt with discount regulations, on account of others, removal of member bank officers and open market operations. ‘OLD WOMAN IN SHOE’ WILL SUPPLY NEEDY Many Will Be Given Footwear Under Auspices of Kiwanis Club. “The Old Woman Who Lived in a Shoe” will have her 1932-33 coming- ou* party under auspices of the Kiwanis Club at the Raleigh Hotel Thursday at 12:30 pm. Mrs. Edward Everett Gann, sister of Vice President Curtis, will be the honor guest. It was hoped the debut party would result in many shoes being sent for needy families. In the meantime the shoe'mbeonduphynummuh. where F. Regis Noel, of the committee, ann socks and mcklnu distribution. After 'nmndny the shoe h;udqunmn will be at 727 Seventeenth street. Shoes donated will be rehabilitated by L.| william Hahn & Sons, who carried on this activity so successfully last year. ‘The committee will attend to the shoes after they are once donated to the cause. Besides being repaired, each will be sterilized. Thousands of ‘were received last year and were given nwny to mm, women and children. children were able to lttend school where they were not before, and many ex-service men were able to walk the streets comfortably shod in search of employment. This is the second year of “The Old Lady Who Lived in a Shoe” in Wash- ington. Mr. Noel originated the idea. DR. HEYL WILL SPEAK Will Address Scientists at Meeting in Cosmos Club Thursday. Dr. Paul R. Heyl, Bureau of !clnd ards gravitation expert, will be speaker at a joint meeting of the Wub- ington Academy of Sciences and the Philosophical socxety of Washington in the assembly hall of the Cosmos Club at _8:15 p.m., Thursday. Dr. Heyl, Whose u\lh]ect will be "Ro- mance or Science?” is now an absolute determination of the - - celoration of gravity. A Bank —doing sM4LL things BIG The Morris Plan? Just a simple sensible way to borrow money for personal uses Come in— You'll like us and the way we do things Morris Plan Bank Under Supervision U. S. Treasury Loaning Hundreds to Thousands NEEDS OF NEXT YEAR WILL BE DISCUSSED Providence Public Aid Director ‘Will Address Social Agency Meeting Tomorrow. Edward P. Reidy, director of public aid in Providence, R. I, will' address the Council of Social Agencies on “What the Depression Means in Terms t Rellef” at a meeting tomorrow at 12:30 p.m. at the Y. W. C. A. Sponsored by the Family Welfare Committee of the council, the session will be devoted to discussion of the needs of next year. Leroy A. Halbert, director of the emergency relief division of the Board of Public Welfare, will talk on '-M future needs of that department, revealed by the exverience of the blt six months. Put them at the HEAD of your Xmas LIST! This weather proves that everybody needs rubber footwear. Sensible gifts! All Rubber Women’s Galoshes Black or brown; warm, gail, " 95¢ c!nped lin- Chfldren 8 Gayters U. S. Rubber Co. Sizes 11 to 3, for misses and children. J Boots for Young Folks Children’s—with red tops—sizes 6 to 2, Heavier ones for boys. Sizes 3 to 5. | U. S. Storm Overshoes