Evening Star Newspaper, September 2, 1921, Page 20

20 *——;—T KEEPING UP WITH THE JON'ESFS—Pa Got Something He Dldn’t Want. i A Good Front. ° ° “A man’s no older than he feels,” I cry, in cheerful tones, as- I limp by on aching heels, |- with stiff and creaking bones. And I imply, my friends, by this, that I am feeling young, that in my form no sparkplugs miss, no bolts are bent or sprung. I'have a crick along my back, and stitches in my side, and yet I cry no hoarse “Alack!” but meet men cheery-eyed; for they would rather hear me tell how voung and blithe I feel, than lis- ten for a weary spell to some urhappy spiel. I go to pieces very fast, my eyes are weak and dim, my neck is in a plaster cast, I need a wooden limbs; I daily don my laurel wreath and haunt the busy marts, to buy me guttapercha teeth and other store-made parts. I need r:ore extras than a Ford to keep me on my feet, and yet by me no man is bored as I jog down the street. For when they ask me how I am, I say, “I'd have vou know, I’'m young as Mary’s little lamb, whose fleece was white as snow!” They look at me through kindly tears, and cry, “Long may you thrive! You're surely younger than your vears, and very much alive!” If I began some dreary tale of sickness and decay, they'd wish 1'd hit the long, long trail with-, out an hour’s delay. LT MASON. (Copsright by George Matthew Adams.) lowers: bring_Smilex_to Shut-ins. Blackistone. 1ith and H.—Advertise- Momey Available f | Loanx | Investments of First-Class Real Estate Mortzage Loans Secured for Depositor Real Estate Savirgs Ban| Start an account here with a dollar. OF COMMERCE AND SAVINGS £ ]th and E Sts. Oft ke gives the gcelfer pleasure, : Cft ke means worth over-measure— Gfiy dees! The 8c C!GAR With tlle 16c Personality Scld Evérywhere Henry T. Offterdinger Malker 508 Ninta Street N.W. i Service Stations Bradburn Bat'y & EL Service. 816 Pa. Ave. S.E. “ledern Auto Supply Co. 917 H St. Et‘mger Bnflery Service 17 Irving St. N.W. The Jolm A. Wineberger Co.,, Inc. 3700 Ga. Ave. N.w. ‘mith’s Bat'v & EL Service 2119 18th St. N.W. | ‘mithdeal Bat'y & EL Service 1919 Pa. Ave. N.w. i Pmmng. 14th St ‘T he Still Better Willard” ] daanmglnn-fla;t::;-Cmpny Cinso Rs 172 OH-00-0-e GO AHEAD Doc! PULL IT, T DonT QN-o-oo o WHATA TOOTHACHE OH-c0-0-0-0 O-00-~ make a Speefalty of mickel plating and silver + plati knives, forks, spocns, ladies’ mesh bags, ete Al work guaranteed. We sharpen all kinds of Kknives, scissors and rasers. THE GIBSON CO0., Inc. 917 G St. N lj Health Candies 40, 60 & 80c Ib. TIRES-TIRES At.Special Prices—at Lower Prices than have been ofl’ered before A wonderful oppormm(y to get several different makes "of tires at less than the regular _ price. You are saving at least 35% to 50% at these prices. Every tire a nop-skid. cev.. $850 33x4 $17.50 . $995 34x4 ......$18.50 $15.00° 33x43; ....$25.00 .$1250 34x41; .. ,.$26.00 $1650 35x5 One-Dollar Tube Sale Good heavy Tubes, Red or Gray. (Buy ome tube at list price; will give you one extra for a dollar.) Buy mow—jyou Wil mever buy so low again. CORD TIRES At 40 Per Cent Off List Price NATIONAL CAPITAL TIRE COMPANY, 1405 14th St. “The Tire Bargain House” * 30x3 . _ 30x3% 32x3% ... DONT WOoRRY! I ONLY CHARGE GAYETY st Sunday Mat. Sept. 4 Hy-‘zh & Herk Presemt Bedini’s Latest Creation CUDDLE UP” With a Typieal Bedini Chorus MAIN 8233 —and ask one of our salesmen to call and demonstrate THE VELIE LIGHT SIX UNGERER MOTOR CO. 1136 Conn. Ave. ‘Telsphone Main £33 No. 1009 On the Avenue—that’s the address of the Big Store for Blank Books and Stationery. E Morrison Paper Co. 1009 Pa. Ave. A LITTLE VOYAGE TO BALTIMORE Leaves Washington, Teh 8¢, Whatt; Men- & V. RWY. CO. Ma. 1 FOR ONE OF 4 MY WSTRUMENTS WHAT'S THE EXTRA FIVE ETROPOLITAN LAST TWO DA I 10:30 A. M, to 11 SALVATiON NELL Edward Sheldon’s Great Play With Special Cast Featuring PAULINE STARKE verture— “ola ll"nlkl at Home and l.l Forelgn Lands” —Harp Solo— “Seni's Avuke-l-t' ss Abrams Comedy—N ews—Topics K CRANDALL’S 18th & Col. Ra. NICKERBOCKIR —TODAY— Beginning at 6130 P. M. VIOLA DANA In @ New Comedy-Romance PUPPETS OF FATE. Mack Sennett’s - “HARD KNOCKS AND LOVE_TAPS” CRANDALL’S, [METROPOLITAN] at 10th D NEXT WEEK 9ol FOUR POPULAR STARS LEWIS 8. STONE BARBARA CASTLETON WILLIAM DESMOND “ITCHIE” HEADRICK Look Wbat We Have With Us for Saturday New Fall Hats Those who want FINEST QUALITY will find that these hats “fill the bill.” Likewise—those who have a desire to be economical will find these “first-o’-the-sea- son” prices attractive. There’s a hat for every face and*a hat for every purse; hats’ for young men and men who want to look young. All the newest fall shades and shapes. §1.95 $2.50 wd $3.40 Men’s Fine All Wool Pants Blue, black and brown serges and dark stnpe worsteds. You'll be sure to find a pair that will go well with that odd coat—which means double wear from.the one suit. . Yes indeed, they’re ALL-WOOL and BEAUTIFULLY TAILORED. . Sizes from 30 to 40. - Now look .at the pnce—you‘ll pay a lot more clsewherc Men s lek-Mxxed Shlrtl stripe designs, to please both the snappy and conservative dresser. Made. to fit exactly right. Sizes. from 14 i 46. Saturday’s price . Sizes from 34 to Cértainly a_ remarkable bargain at Saturday's price of A Drama That Has Never Been Equaled in Novelty of Plot, Dra- matic Intensity, or the Charm of the Humor Imparted to the Pic- ture by the Greatest Four-year-old Actor on the Screen. Directed by JOHN M. STAHL Maker of “The Woman in His House” +—EXTRA— LARRY SEMON IN HIS LATEST TWO-REELER || “THE FALL GUY” OVERTURE, “ROSAMUNDE” METROPOLITAN SYMPHONY PATHE NEWS—TOPICS WASHqGTDH'S ONLY REAL Free Admission Pleasure GLEN ECHO PRESENTS 40 FUN FEATURES SIX BIG RIDES AND A BIG BALL ROOM FOR PROPER DANUING TO OEHMANN'S GREAT MUSIC yeug of the ‘Season. Next Woek, Com. Moniay Night Marc Klaw, Inc., Presents OTHER LIVES Delightful Dancing CHEVY CHASE Great Falls Park Men’s Nainsook Union' Suits Fine quality .nainsook, 'but- tons strongly sewed; belt in back. elastio 59¢ The Ideal Family Picnic Resart FREE Simenscwny ey e Unobstructed View of the GREAT FALLS OF THE POTOMAC REN : (War ‘Tax ‘Tncluded.) ndays and Legal Holidays—Extra ex- ,,.5:‘. Tt "Teaves arent Fells 1056 25k EUNDAYS—Extrs tralns operated on frequent schedules. Girl. Sawed In Two The Baffiing Surgical Mystery *2].7, Next Week—Ex. Mat, Keith’s 5%, 3 Tavor Day Celebration of ~ Lafayette Day at Mt. Vernon Tuesday, Sept. 6th Special_express service direet Mt. Vernon, Arlington National Cemetery. Via. The Historic Route—Stop-ovér. i allowed at Histocic Alexandria - to yislt Curlst Church and W ton's comfc e Cara leave 13th Bt &' Pa flve: N.W. every § and 55 minutes 16c Adidonat or Site aeihar ‘Fatormation For _further - information, Main 897, Wuhlnggon-Virglnh Railway Park ! Alexandria and i} telephone | 11 AM—vasT 2 -LAST 3 DAYS—11 P.0L Realart Presents BEBE DANIELS In Rer’liveliest of comodiss ONE WILD WEEK . Famons Rialto . Orchestra ROBERT BOND GOTTA | —CONDUCTOR— Overture, “Il Guaramy,” by Gomez LECTED SUBSIDIARIE; NEXT WEEK Cast Includes: Milt Mitchell Lewis, Cass suson and Ji Girl Sawed In Two The Baffing Surgical Mystery *th’e Next Week—Ex. Mat. Keith’s 5. M Tavor as LOEW’s LAST TWO DAYS The Eminent Character Actor ARLISS In a photoplay version of his greatest stage success “DISRAELI” N Y, &/ B. F. KEITH'S %= Daily 33 Sum 333 Hol'y 20,5 “Inimitable’—Post DAPHNE POLLARD in her vurld-[u‘nioullh songs, ditties and ANATOL & 00.. Harriet contury: EXTRA MAT. 5 P.M. LABOR DAY Everybody’s Going To GOLEM A Sereen Masterpiece~Waah. Post “THE FOUR HORSEMEN | AMERI {§ REVERE (| NEW THEATE I Rerinnine Sunda; l “FATTY ARBUCKLE” ||| In #Crazy to Warry” | T TWO.DAYS— - GLORIA SWMISGH That '"'“o‘am mlluumm beauty n her fired “THE GREAT MOHEI'I'" BY ELINOR GLYN A PARAMOUNT PIOCTURE EXTRA TODAY AND TOMORROW ONLY MISS MARGARET GORMAN 1 in The Mdfldcholu::'am’::ffl Atlantio Oity beauty pageant as— “MISS WASHINGTON” _WILL APPEAR IN PERSON the st Locw' [/ todam o afl-ol s m AT 3:30 AND 9 P.M.- Spend the Week-End and LABOR DAY at COLONIAL BEACH WASHINGTON’S ATLANTIC CITY PALATIAL steamex ST. JOHNS Leaves Foot of Seventh Street Wharf SATURDAY, SEPT. 3, 2:30 P. M.; SUNDAY, SEP'I'. 49A M; MONDAY, LABOR DAY AT 9 A Boardwalk, Boating, Sailing, Fishing, Crabbing, All Am sements. 40-Mile Moonlight Trips—Monday, \fedneflh;l ‘l.lld Ndl; at 715 EXTRA TRIP TUESDAY, SEPT 6 Leave 9 A.M, Return 6 P.M. Special Film Features NEW STANTON TODAY—BEBE DANIELS. in (\'Mn;{n: T sl;owp And COMEDY, - RAPHAEL 9th at O svm:'nw RD. = ME * TF HOLIDAY ey MATISEE MONDAT AT it St. and ALL STAR “DECEP’ Ave. llb’l‘llol’ol.l'l‘ AN Street North Camieai - vt 10 WALLACE REID, in “T00 MUCH SPEED.” LIBER 14th_ Street and R. L Ave. DOROTHY DALTON. in “THE IDOL OF THE NORTH.” THEATER, Gn. Ave. and Park Rd. GLADYS WALTON. in HORT SKIRTS.” 535 Sth St. S.E ““WESTERN CRANDALI.’S = Sk S BANKS. in : ERANDALL' ‘s\ voy .’I‘.Itrlte; a TODAY—BRY HOME FLOR] and LLOYD HUGHI PRINCESS 1112 n St. N.E. LIONEL BARRYMORE, in “THE GREAT ADVENTURE." 1230 C Street N.S. THOMAS H. I S LYRIC 5osis’ onstoie Ard [ALLR CAPITOL THEATER The Thestar & Opens. Bun iy l'nifisf:.“gp:;i. 4. MAX. SPIEGEL'S SOCIAL FOLLIES ‘With & Spiege] Beauty Chorus. In the Cool of the Evening Take 32-MILE MOONLIGHT SAIL ON HURRICANF. DECK TO MARSHALL HALL “On the Historic Potomac.” DANCING EVERY EVENING e aeer and at Sarahtl Hall Teaves 7th St. Wharf 10 a.m., 2:30 and 6:45 p.m. Bound Trip. Sbc . Including War Tax. Great Falls by Water t Peses leaves Agueduct bridse Sunday apd y at 10 @ cents. Rates to charter par — by a Established 1600. | i \Vashmgton Studio of Danfe. P orth 6786, 431 11th nw. Open .1:30-11:30. 8 lessons, $5 (private and cu-) . Dancing Mou., Wed., Sat., 8:30-11 | Ladies. Z5c. Genflemen.’ 53¢, tax paid. Where to Spend Your Evenings ;s NEW YORK DANCING ACADEMY BERT ORCHESTRA 1IN JTHE CITY OPEN 10 A.M. TO 11:45 P.M. CLASS OR_ PRIVATE NS. . TEACH YOU TO DANCE IN Girl Sawed In Two The Bafling Surgieal Mystery , Next Week—Ex. Mat. Kei YOU ST. 5 P. M. Labor Day REPUBLIC 2. A-Urln»:l Finest Colorsd Movie ouss —ON THE BAY— i s Salt Water Resort Only One Hour's Ride Bathing—Boating Fishing at Its Best All Seashore Attractions TE! Individual Instroction By Appointment Only. ‘Wast to Dance! You Oan khht&%&chul of Dan York Ave. N.W. Individual P You meed Dot have an -n-i tment. M 10 | Amerfca’s foremost a m. 1010 pm, Frankila 864 * MISS CHAPPELEAR Private lessons by tment. North 5197. 715_Connecfiout Ave. DAVISON’SE-1329 M n.w. 5 huflmhhmhl‘fll"'_ ! bour. Normsl - Lo . iz