Chicago Daily Tribune Newspaper, August 28, 1881, Page 4

p25 1, his confinement has cust him the use of one Earonereny ~~ Club 97 Hive. * aueeting the demands on it for British coin. ~_ bay the forfeit of his life for his brital crime. \-Niament. The speech was, of course, de- * « fk “THE CHICAGO TRIBUNE: SUNDAY, AUGUST 28, 1881 EIGHTEEN PAGES. urer, has reaped a rich reward from appeal- aa proof of the dangers of admitting min tog come She Critame. TERMS OF SUBSCRI-LION. - BY MAIL--IN ADVANCE—POSTAGE PREPAID. WEEKLY EDITIO: One copy. per yi * Twenty-one - Specimen copies sent free. ; Give Post-Office address in full, including County and Sinte. * Remluances may be mace either by draft, express, Post-Office order, or in registered letter, at our risk. TO CITY SUBSCRIBEKS. Daily, delivered, Senday excepted. 25 cents per week, Ually, delivered, Sundsy included, 30 cents per week, Adéress THE TRIBUNE COMPA ‘Corner Madison and Dearborn-sts., Chicago, HL. Y, POSTAGE. Entered at the Post-Office at Chicags, UL, as Second- Class Matter. Forthe benefit of our patrons who desire to send Angle copies of THE TRIBUNE throuzh the mail, we tive herewith the transient rate of postact Eieht ana tw: eciae and Domestic right and Twelve Pace Lapel Sixteen Pare Paper.ne-scre TRIBUNE EEANCIL OFFICES. THER CHICAGO TRIBUNE hus established branch pices for the receipt of subscriptions and advertise- wents nz follows: “KEW YONK—Loum 2 Tribune Building. F.T. Mc- apex, Manazer. GLASGOW, Scotland~Allan’s American News * Agency, Sl Rentetd-st. LONDON, Eng—Ameriean Fxchanze, #9 Strand, Mesny F. Guat APOLLO COMMANDERY, > PLAR—Attention, Sir Kntgiit Litled to rende OUR At Mondas morning, Auz. 2, 1sL. dek prompt, tg attend the funeral of our inte F SirGeorge 1 Chittenden. Kt. The funcral services will be held at The honse ot our decensed Frater. No 192 Michigun- ay.,at Hoclock a.m. Commanders will proceed by y rafriages ty the house and frum thence by carrinces Aud special car to Rosehitl Cemetery, ‘Vrain leaves SENW.IC IC depot at lo'clock. Ail sir Knights, Frespective of dtvision, are requested to atrend. ‘By order of the Eminent Commander, | . : HS, TIFFARY, Recorder, G2 ALK.& a. M—The ereby notified to mee? at the ha rove-av. ond ‘Thirty-seventl at o‘clock sharp, 10 ntte f cur deceased brother, wer lodges are traternull W. CHAMBERLALY, W.M. ecretary. luneral of iudah. Members ited to Join with us, MYHON ITA ite ‘O, 1% KNIGHTS F Rnthts alenys welcome. Ty order of iH. POND, B.C. DAVID GoupMas, Recorder. —Members of the ¢ present Munday Ini- “HOME LODGE, sbave Jodce are requested to * wvening next. ecial order of evening will be istion. Vishing brothers cardiaily mvited. . REMY, Secretary. XO, 418, LO. 0. THOMAS J. TURNER LOVGE, No. #8 AP. & AL W—Regatar Conimunieation Thursday evening, Sep "Important business and work, Every member trgentiy requesied to be present. Visiting bretheren islly invited. bores anlen 1. NICKOLS, W. Mt. retary. Tnighte ‘Tempin: Paisp. m. inights welcome. jer of zhe NEY CyIANN, ORIENTAL, LONGE, NO.3, A. F. & ASL, Hall 12 is Nalle-et—Rerniur Communication Friday even- 0g, Sept = Work. By order F. G. BEECHER, W. &. OHALLES CATLL eretary. > APOLLO, COMMAND“RY, NO. 1, ENIGHTS Demplar.—There will he.no Ci hs, Anz, 3, 1581. auhder. SUNDAY, AUGUST 28, iss. “ OwiNe to the protracted'drought through- autGermany farmers are so short of hay that they are selling their plow-horses and Killing their cattle. This is more particu- “larly the case in Schleswig-lolstein and Oldenburg. “MP. Bortoy, one of the Land. League “suspects” confined in Kilmainham Jail, -Has been visited by two provincial members of the Land League, who assert that, while the prisoner is apparently in good health, of his eyes. Tue Bank of England, as stated in yester- day’s Tribune, refuses to self gold bars for transmission to this country, but does all « that can bé legally demanded in the way of ‘Ithas reduced the price of French coins,— Amperials and Napoleons,—the former to $19.79 per ounce, the latter to $18.57 per ounce. The demand for gold by American shippers surprises the European bankers. Bin. GRINNELL, the American Consul at Bremen, reports to Secretary Blaine that during the first six months of the present year 1,290,000 bushels of American corn had | been imported into Germany. Mr. Grinnell says that 2 much larger quantity will be im- ported during the last six munthsof the year, and that there is no doubt that the amount will continue to increase, as the Germang have . come to recognize corn as an excellent fuod. Jaues Tobin, who pleaded guilty in the * Criminal Court last Monday to the charge of having stainped the life out of his: 17-year- “old daughter about a year ago, was yester- day sentenced to penal servitude for life. Judge Gardner, who passed sentence, helds , that sufficient premeditation was not proved to justify him in decreeing that Tobin should The ruffian Tevin just escapes the gallows, a\T the last session of the German Reichs- ing ample powers were conferred on the Government for the suppression of Socialism anc Communism in Germany. The Govern- menthas-not been sparing of the powers then conferred, but it does not appear that Socialism has been crushed out. Tnat a large number of the electors of the Fourth Berlin District, notwithstanding that Berlin is“‘in a state of sieze,”” have determined to vote for Herr Bevel, the noted Communist, is- ample proof of th ‘Tur Londen'correspondent of the Liver- pool Muil, Aug. 15, says that signs of a land agitation in England in the immediate fut- ‘ure are increasing every day. He says: “It would, indeed, be too much to expect that the English farmer, half rnined by bad sea- sons and scientific political economy, should not se@ with envy the reward held out by the present Government to successtul agitation.” The Cambridgeshire farmers, according to _ his statement, have taken the lead, and are about to form’n Land League of their own:! district, and others are getting ready to fol- low their example, Tse Queen's speech proroguing Parlia- iment was listened to. yesterday by a few Lords, theSpeaker of the House of Commons, ‘and a very small number of members of Par- ‘ livered by the Lord Cliancellor, and does not differ materially from speeches delivered on like occasions previously. It refers to the + pacificatory measures in South Africa, the efforts made to get Turkey to cede Thessaly to Greece, the withdrawal of British treops from Afghanistan, and the passage of the trish Land act.. The Queen is ; made to say that she hopes the Iast- named measure will have a pacificatory effect in Ireland, and that it- will have the effect of. benefiting the agricultural population. Her Majesty is made to deplore the failure of the negotiations fora commercial treaty. fetes Brance and England, and to express | “Dr. Thomas May well congiatulate him. hope that suecess may attend future efforts. The Irish Coercion act is referred to, and the hope is expressed that it may soon bea dead letter. The most significant part of .the speech, so called, is that which refers to the failure of Parliament, “ notwithstanding exertions almost unparalleled,” to pass “many measures on subjects of importance,” or to “ adequately provide the country with legislation adapted to its growing wants.” —_——_—_———_— Waverry N. RaGcianp published an ed-- itorial in the Virgintan Readjuster which eterized Thomas G. Watkins, a young fawyer of Petersburg, Va. as a political seavenger. The Virginian ire of Watkins was roused. Ile asked the bellicose editor out. The Petersburg Constables took Wat- kins in, and it is probable that no “goah” will be shed. ARY BLAINE sent a cablegram to Mr, Lowell at half-past 10 o’clock last night saying that there was a niore hopeful con- dition at Washington last night in regard io the President’s condition. His pulse was Jower and of better quality, his mind was entirely clear, and he showed a positive ap- petite, asking for milk toast, a small quan- tity of whieh he was permitted to eat, A slignt Increase in his respiration was the only unfavorable symptom reported. It should be remembered in this connection that, until he partook of the milk toast yes- terday, he had not swallowed anything but liquid food for several day: Oxe prominent cause of the immense emi- gration from Germany to this country may be found in the small remuneration paid for labor. Inarecent publication of wage-sta- tistics, it is found that in one of seven districts for which the statisties are given the average weekly wages of plasterers, who are compelled to. work eleven hours a day, are $6.43. week; laborers receive only $4; carpenters and joiners from $3.57 to $4.76; Jocksmiths, $4.29; tailors, working twelve hours daily, $1.43, with board and lodging, and shoemakers the same. At such wages as these, it is, of course, well nigh impossi- ble for laborers to obtain even’ the bare necessities of life. 1t isno wonder, therefore, that so large a proportion of German emi- grants comes from these classes. Tne newspapers which have been caviling about the subscription fund started. by Cyrus Field for the benefit of President Gartield’s family will probably have the grace and dis- cretion to admit now that the movement was proper and timely. Fortunately, the pro- inoters of the subscription were not dis cour- aged in their work by the gratuitous and low- flung suspicions that were cast upon their motives, but have proceeded in such manner as to assure the completion of the project, Over $150,000 of the vrojected fund of $250,- 099 has been paid in, and $125,000 of United States bonds have been purchased, bearing an interest of $3,000 a year, and placed in the hands of the United States Trust Company as a trust fund. It is safe to predict that the remainder of the fund will be made up within twenty-four hours after the President’s death shall be announced. The American people cannot restore her husband to Mrs. Garfield, nor the father to his children, but they can and will make such provision for the martyr’s family as shall reasonably guarantee them against future want. We should think every man would feel a burning sense’of shame who has’ written a single line to discourage, belittle, or ridicule the subscription move- meut, or to reflect upon the purpose of any oue of those who have contributed to it. ‘Tnx New York Times, commenting on the operations in Tunis, says the experience of the French bids fair to be a fae simile of that of the Englisn in Afghanistan; that the French troops are preparing to advance upon Kairivan, the “Holy City” of the Tunisian Arabs, as the English recently advanced upon Candahar, in Afghanistan; that the Bey, like Ayoob Khan, has made a seemingly vigorous effort to induce the rebels to sub- mit, having no doubt privately encouraged them to resist; and that the parallel will doubtiess be completed by the desertion of the native troops sent to co- operate with the French and their appear- ance in the ranks of the enemy. ‘There may be some points of resemblance between the Afghan and the Tunisian campaigns, but the one is by no means a fac simile of the other, as the Times states. On the other hand, there is one difference so radical that it de- stroys the whole parallel. The English in their Afghan campaign had to traverse a dis- tance of 12,000 miles, through the Mediter- ranean, Suez Canal, Red Sea, and Indian Ocean, and, when they were in Afghanistan, march over many weary miles of mountain- ous country, presenting almost insurmount- able obstacles to the progress of an army, while the country they invaded was four or five times as large as Tunis. TheFrench are only a day’s sail away from Tunis, and can strike its coast at any point from Marseilles in twenty-four hours. It is no more difficult for the French to prosecute their operations along the Tunisian coast than itis for Chicago to conduct her com- merce along the Michigan shore, while En- gland labored under the difficulties and-de- Jays that Chicago would experience in con- ducting commerce with Europe. It is ab- surd to suppose for an instant that thirty millions of people, with all the material of war and transportation, cannot, if they are so disposed, overwhelm two millions of fanat- ica! Arabs only twenty-four hours distant by sen from them. The job might be a dis- agreeable one, but it would be of short dura- tion if undertaken in earnest, howeve? braye the Arabs might prove theniselves to be. VV E0cLEslastical- HERESY HUNTS. The Rev. Dr. Thomas is to be tried for dogmatic heresy. Everybody knows this fact, and everybody knows that the trial is tobe purely technical, because among Dr. Thomas’ theological enemies there is prob- ably not one disposed to deny to him the possession of any of the virtues which usually accompany the profession and prac- tice of the Christian religion. Dr. Thomas is to be tried, and, if possible, driven from the pale of the Methodist Episcopal Church on a point of doctrine. Dr. Thomas is so sure that the case against him is to turn upon a fine Moint that he is not content to rest his defense solely in the hands of clerical counsel. Ie feels constrained to call to the assistance of the Rev. Messrs. Shepard and ‘Trusdell men learned in the civil law, in order that a technical prosecution may be met by a technical defense. This is as it should be. In the old inquisitorial heresy trials of the Church of Rome to appear was to be tried in secret and openly condemned. The only defense permitted was worse than a.farce: if was an admission that justice might be expected where it was not even hoped for. When Fra Paolo Sarpi, historian of the Council of Trent, was Invited” to Rome he prudently refrained from accepting the invitation, and saved his life, though his assasination was attempted and he was se- verely wounded, whereupon he coolly re- marked, “I know the Roman dagger.” Dr. Thomas knows that his trial will be public, and that if he is to be condemned by the Methodist. Episcopal Church, as he probably ‘will be; he may be acquitted. by: the public, as he probably will be.-, ae ” self not only that no torture can possibly fol- low his trial, but that the rules of evidence in ecclesiustical. trials have been radically changed within the last five hunared years. It is worth while, inthis connection, tu repro- duce some of the inquisitorial rules of evi- dence to show what great strides have been made in the direetion of liberalism in ecclesiastical trials.. Here is one of the “in- structions” to Inquisitors as laid down int the Directory of Eymeric: “In a cause of heresy you should proceed quietly and simply, with- out formality and noise of pleadinys. There should he no delay, no interruption, no ap- peal, and as few witnesses as possible. It.is thepeeuliar and high privilege of the Tribunal of the Inquisition that its Judges are not obliged to follow forensic rules.” Dr. ‘Thomas will not be tried by this rule. Fol- Jowing are some of the rules of evidence laid down by. Eymeric for the guidance of In- quisitors in heresy trials: In cases of heresy, testimony of all sorts of persons is admissible. ‘They.may be excommu- nieate, infamous, accomplices,or convicted of any crime. Heretics, too, may" give evidence; but only agaiust the culprit is it Valid; never in his favor. : ‘The good Eymeric thus comments upon this rule: ‘This provision is most prudent, nay, it Is most just; for, since the heretic bus broken faith towsrds bis God. no one ought to take bis word; and {t should always be presumed that, say what he muy,-he fs actunted bY butred to the Chureh, and adesire that crimes ayninst tho 1uith may gounpunistied. We quote further from the Directory: ‘The testimony of infidels. and Jews may be taken also in a question of heretical doctrine. ‘Tne testimony of fulse witnesses is also taken, if against the nccused person, even though previous favorable testimony’ may have becu retracted. And note, that if the first, deelara- tion was against him, and the second favorable, the tirst only must be accepted. . .. Domestié witnesses—wife, for example, children, reta: tives, servants—may have thelr testimony cepted against him, and then it has great viulue; but it never must i Tho criminal must not seo the witnesses, nor kuow who they were. . .,. When the culprit js Informed of tho charge aguinst. nim, .tho names of witnesses should bo concealed; or, if there be any particnlars In the ebarzes that would help him to zuess tho names, the testi- ne person should bo attrit or names should be sut stituted of persons that were not witness but, atier all, it {3 best to suppress all name », +. False witnesses who have caused tho Yeath of an dnnocent person must not suffer any severer punishment than perpetual contine- ment... . ‘The Inquisitor must not question the culprit in such a mnuer as to suggest sub- terfuyes, or help evasion, But let his iuterroga tions be Yaeue and general. Tou much pr deuce and firmness can never be employed in the interrogation of a prisoner. The heretics are very cunnmge in disguising their errors. ‘They attect sanctity, and shed false tears whi might soften the severest Judges. An Inquis itor must arm himself agai these tricks, always supposing that they are tryng to deceive i ‘The Inquisitor was instructed to exhaust all the artifiees 6f duplicity and dissimulanion to force a confession from the culprit as to tax him with having contradicted himself, turning over the notes of the evidence under the pretense of having discovered the contra- diction. Says the Directory: “ Read your papers, turn over the leaves, and say, every now and then. ‘Ah! did I not say so? Con- fess the truth.’ But be careful not to go into particulars lest he sce that-you know nothing about them.” Tune Inquisitor was directed to confuse the culprit by the multi- plication of questions until his self-possession should be destroyed, and then put him to the torture,—‘ and, when his answers are con- fused, the doctors agree that you may put him to the tortute.” He was instructed to promise to pardon the culprit in qrder to extort a confession,—‘ So tell him if he will confess he shall haye more than he could himself desire; and so he will, for you will save his soul.’”” ‘These rules are 500 years old. They have never been repealed, but their enforcement is no longerconvenient. The ‘“seculararm” has grown somewhat in strength in the last three centuries, and has been interposed to prevent ecclesiastical trials of this character, ‘The Church which is about to try Dr. Thomas never sanctioned the rules of evidence wo have cited. Indeed, it has contributed power- fully to their abrogation. But the principle involved in the forthcoming. trial is precisely that for which the Church of Rome contend- ed for many centuries—namely: the right to make strict adhesion to certain articles of theological faith rather than correct religious practices the test of religious character. ‘The trial of Dr. Thomas will be watched with deep interest by. the public, for the Methodist £piscopal denomination has hitherto allowed a considerable latitude to its adherents in the matter of mere dogma; and to this fact, perhaps+inay be attributed ina large degree highly flourishing con- dition. MRS, GARFIELD. “T still have good hope.” AJ! thtough the long and weary watch at the President’sbed- side these cheerful words have come from the lips of the devoted wife. When the surgeons have said “Only a miracle can save him,” Mrs. Garfield with noble fortitude has responded: ‘fhen the miracle will occur; my husband will recover; he must!” A Washington dispatch yesterday morning to Tux Trisune said: From dark last evening until dawn this (Fri- day) morning, the nusse suid, the President was almost all the while unconscious. The only clear moment he had was xbout midnight, when be aroused somewhat and recognized his wite by his bedside. Ina weak und trembling whisper he said, “Crete [to bis wife], you bd better go toyour room and get a little rest.” Mrs. Gar- field asked to be ullowed to remain with him a while lovger. He then remarked, in the sume weak whisper, that he fearcd that the time waa near at hand when they would have to scarate for- ever.- This was the burdest blow of all for Mrs. Gartield. She tried hurd. however, to overcome her feelings, and in u measure suceeded; but it was aburd ‘trial for her. After this touching incident he aeain went back into that stupor characteristic of a dying man, and thus re- mained until before the dressing of the wound this morning. ‘The country was not surprised when the President was stricken at his exhibition of high intellectual and moral qualities, at his self-poise, his calmness, his willingness to abide eithet fortune. iis life struggle was then an open book, known and read of all men, [lis career proved that he possessed the stuff of which strong, heroic characters are made.. The American people expected Garfield to struggle with wounds and disease, as he had struggled wich the difficulties of life, like a giant, They, however, knew little of Garfield’s wife. She had lately been brought to the very borders of the tomb, and the people sorrowed for her and sympathized. with her illustrious husband. But they did not know, and hence could not appreciate, Mrs. Gartield’s worthiness to share the cares and responsibilities of the President. When Garfield, in the presence of the Nation and the world, on inauguration-day, tenderly kissed his aged mother and his fond wife, the act was regarded by superticial crities as anevidence of rather effusive sentimentality; but more profound observers detected in ita solemn recognition of the inspiration of the great man’s noble career. When the Presi- dent was felled to the earth by the assasin’s shot his first thought was of his faithful, devoted wife. With the honors of a Naton thick upon him, wiih the prayers of a great people for his recovery surrounding him like an atmospliere, he was jJonely. Me demanded that affection which’ had been his supreme joy in every bright hour and his precious solace in every hour of afffiction. In that shock, when the Angel of Death seemed to hover near him, but was yet afar off, he counted the minutes which separated him from his wife. Upon the arrival of Mrs. Garfield there was a perceptible improvement in ‘the condition of the President. He was ready to begin the struggle of life, and she was ready to help him forward at every step. As when Gar- field ‘kissed his. wife onthe steps of the i Capitol, in-the_presence of the multitude, he taid his honorg at, her feet and something more than acknowledged her worthiness to share and bear théili;*o at the bedside of her suffering hisband:,hus Mrs. Garfield devoutly, conrageausit; ytd the devotion of agreat soul. The world isfuli of noble, devoted wives, but their herdic/Sti‘ggeles are hidden from the public gaze by’ thie veil of obscurity. The example of “their! self- sacrificing devotion is. lost upon inuikind, because their tears are witnessed only by, the members of the narrow home circle, their | agonizing prayers heard only by the God of the aMlicted. But the spectacle of suffering and devotion presented in the Executive Mansion Is observed by the whole country, —nay, by the whole world. And the confi- dence and trust of the husband, and the love and devotion of the wife, afford an‘example of that mutuality of domestic fidelity;which constitutes the one only sure guarantee of public virtue, ‘ 2 President Garfield’s inner life has been Jaid bare before the American people, and it discloses the seeret springs of his splendid career,—his steady growth mm. intellectual and moral force, His mother guidtd him througlvall the perils of boyhood, stimulat- ing his more noble ambitions, and restrain- ing with a firm hand every tendency to waywardnéss. The wife nobly supple mented the nother, comforting the husband with the fondness of . true _ affection, and cheering every forward step of the aspir. inganan as he rose higher and higher on the ladder of fame. It is a eruel. fate that sepa- rates these noble souls, long so closely united. How the woman’s tears will flow when there shall be no longer need of heroism! And the country. will weep with and for the woman who must taste the bitter cup of in- consolable grief. But the beautiful domes- tie scene which, in the Executive Mansion, has held the world in tearful, admiring awe for eight long weeks will remain as a herit- ago to'the American people. May it be sanctified te the growth of public and private virtue. WIVES FOR A DOLLAR APIECE. There is a boom: in stocks, a boom in wheat, a boom in corn, and in almost every description of merchandise transactions are simply immense. But the market for wives is depressed, especially in New York City. The only marital transaction of the week of which the reporters could get full. particu- lars occurred between ono Lauter and one Jansen. Lauter sold his wife, a healthy, hearty, cheerful woman of thirty-two sum- mers or thereabouts, to Jansen, for a dollar. ‘There seems to have been, previous to the negotiation which resulted in the purchase and transfer by “bill of sale,” a condition of moderate marital infelleity in the Lauter household. Lauter entertained a suspicion that his wife was fond of Jansen, and called that gentlemafi “lots of bad names,” where- upon Mrs. Lauter’ “slapped”? Mr. Lauter’s face, and told him she would do as she pleased. ‘Then Lauter “cooled down,” and, “in a sort of sneering way,” in- timated that as Mrs. Lauter appeared to be of great value’ to Jansen, he (Lauter) would sell her. Jansen pricked up his ears, so to speak, and opened the negotiation on che spot by offering 50 cents. But Lauter was not to be “taken in.” He saw that Jansen was anxious to buy, and he cunningly concealed his own desire to sell, doubtiess by an appearance of renewed tenderness for the subject of the barter, and coolly demanded ajdollar! Per- haps if Jansen had controlled his emotions. and assumed an air of inaifference his original offer of 50 cents might ultimately lave been accepted. But what lover can smother the deep feelings of his heart in the presence of his adored! There sat Mrs. Lanter between the chaffer- ers, her eyes modestly cast down, her bosom heaving with emotion, her heart fluttering, now buoyed up by hope, now sinking with fear, Jansen glanced at Mrs. Lauter; Mrs, Lauter heaved asigh, and two pearly tears rolled down her pink cheeks. This was too much for Jansen; in a choking voice he said “Done!? A Dill of sale was drawn and executed and the money paid. The property, presumptively having been previously delivered, there was no necessity for a formal act of transfer. With singular inconsistency Mrs. Jansen nee Lauter, while desiring to transfer her per- son and affections to Jansen, immediately upon the completion of the trade exhibited the greatest animosity towards her late lord, but not master, tor having sold her. Seizing the bill of sale she exclaimed, with passion: This Lum going to keep and make him sweat for what he has done. Scll me out, will be? Well, if Lget my_tingers in bis hair, ne'll haven bald spot where I struck. He is—ugb! I could: find words enough to deseribe him. On! y sbull live with Jansen now and never go bick to Lauter. I'm sold. The wretch! But let me catch. bim! ‘The story of the loves of Jansen and Mrs. Lauter, as told by the latter, is romantic in the highest degree. When she first net her present husband she admits that she had be- come “a little tired? of Lauter, and that she became very fund of Jansen,—loved him, in fact, at sight, and has “doted on him ever since.” Jansen’s nose seems first to have attracted Mrs. Lauter’s attention and fired her heart. She says “His nose is a little inclined to be rosy, but of such a deli- eate tint thai one wouldn’t notice it inadark room.” That rosy-tinted nose went straight to Mrs. Lauter’s heart! And Mrs. Lauter’s nose, whether “a little in- clined to be rosy ” or not is not disclosed in the narrative, seems to have toyched Jan- sen’s heart.. For when Mrs. Lauter hadn’t known him much more than a week “he took her in his arms and kissed heron tho end of the nose.” Of course, as Mrs. Lauter is a modest woman, she “struggled and slapped his face.” But the delightfr” «sect of that Kiss on the endof hernosy mains with her stil, For, notwithstu:%ng ‘she avers that she “struggled and slapped the face” of the rosy-nosed Jansen, she fs moved toexclaim, ‘But, oh! how I liked it? Whether Mrs. Lauter kissed Jansen’s rosy nose does not appear, but there is a strong presumption that she did, since she admired it so much, and that the love-making between ‘the happy pair consisted chiefly in kissing each other's attractive noses. According to the story of Mrs. Jansen, formerly Mrs. Lauter, the love-making of that period was of the most decorous charac- ter, doubtless confined entirely to salutes on the nose, for she says: “ We always be- haved ourselves.” He bought ice-cream for her and she made neckties for him. She kissed his rosy nose and he kissed her rosy nose. But alas! this halcyon period was destined to a rude disturbance. Lauter sus- pected something and scolded his wife. Per- haps her nose was too rosy when she re- turned from the ice-cream saloon, Perhaps there was a suspicious similarity of rosiness apparent in the respective proboscises of the lovers, which let Lauter to a discovery of the secret of their peculiar osculatory em- braces. He may have detected the lovers in the act of blowing kisses at each other's rosy-' noses. Atall events a storm arose in, the Lauter mansion with the result stated,.For adollar Jansen bought Mrs. Lauter,’ nose ano all, as it were. Foradollar hesécured the sweet privilege of imprinting kiss8s upon that dear woman’s nose from morning till night, and vice versa. In this kissing-inatch Mrs. and Mr. Jansen may be at ‘the top of happi- ness, but all their: jov'does not alter tne rather depressing fact. that the market for ae i a ‘wives is whatinight bé appropriately termed “fat” Wiyes at a dollar apiece.are dog cheap, and now js the time for poor men to supply themselves. ‘There is no tex on wives _as there is ou dogs, and they are not required by law to be muzzled, perhaps because no Governmenton earth could execute such a law. For the benefit of those masculines who want to secure wives cheap, and at the same time obtain a good title, we append the approved form of the necessary bill of sale: New York: Aug, 3, 1851.—I, Edward A. Lauter, .of the City, Qouaty, and State of New York, do dispose of alLimy right, title, and interest in:the Woman knows as my wife to Ferdinand Jangen, of the said Ctty, County, and State of New York, for the sum and in consideration of $1, lawful money of the United States of America. or »Epwarb LAUTER. —_— BaSE-BALL IN 1881. The general public have reason for con- aratulation.that the base-ball season in Chi- cago is over. “VThe fast man has had his turn’ at the oat, has made his last run, has struck the last foul, and’ has becn put out to stay. Let there be thanks that tho season is over, ing to the public to demand hrs: goods in pref- erence to any others of the same kind; and still, witn the best argument in the world, and the best natural advantages of any manufacturers anywhere, the makers of canned goods in Ch{- cago are silent in the face of the fuct that man- ufacturers frum a distance and from Europe are disputing their claim io their own market Yor the most desiruble and profitable part of tt, —the fine und cboice trade. There is something wrong, or else there is a great deal of ignorance concerning the merit of Chicago canned goods. $$ Ir is difficult to understand why the Mayor of Chicago considered it uecessury to Ko to Coney Island for the purpose of enjoying the horse-races at that point, us by stationing him- self on almost any corner in this city he could have witnessed similar contests of a most ox- viting charactor, and considerably more danger- ous to life and limb than any steeplechase which tho “boys” ut Coney Island cnn possibly devise for the amusement of the head of our City Government. One prominent feature of the teumster nuisance, to which THe TxrBoNe has several times calied attention recently, {8 so peculiarly a product of the reckless disregard of human life churacteristic of Chicaxo teamsters andthat-for eight months to come the Na- tional gamewill be played here no more. The support given’‘to this’ time-killlng game in Chicago is sdmething marvelous. In fact, if it were not fqy.Chicago it would notbe possible to maintain what is called “the League” at all. Warious cities have long ago got sick of this.zame, and no longer supvort a “team.” Cincinnati, St. Louis, New York, Philadelphia, Brooklyn, . and Baltimore do not “patronize the game” sufficiently to pay for keeping up a hired “team” of professionals. The citiks which are now represented in the “League” are Cleveland, Troy, Provi- dence, Worcester, Boston, Detroit, Buffalo, and Chicago; in other’ words, these are the only places at which there can be drummed up a suflicient crowd of idlers to pay ex- penses, Of these Chicago is.the principal supporter of the ball game; the clubs from other places come here in order to share the receipts, or the “gate-money,”? and from their earnings here eke out the scant reecipts at the other towns. It is not an unusual thing to have 4,000 to 6,000 jdlers at a game in Chicago; the number has reached §,000, and rarely ever less than 2,000 or 3,000. At other places the number of itors ranges from 300 to 1,000, the latter being a fair maximum outside of. Chicago. ‘The difference to the rural clubs is impor- tant. ‘The price of admission here is half a dollar, of which the home hired club re- ceives 35 cents and the visiting club 15 cents. Thus the Chicago ciub has played and will play during the season forty-two games at home and forty-two games abroad. Estimat- ing the average game at. Chicago to have had 3,000 visitors, the average receipts of each game has been $1,690, of which the local club has received $1,100 and the visitors But the Chicago club must play also during the season forty-two other games at other places, where the average attendance is, to put it liberally, 600 persons and the receipts $309, of which the Chicago as the visiting elub receives $80 and the home club $220 per “inufling ” performance. It will be seen, therefore, that the Chicago hired club when it plays elsewhere receives about 6 per cent of what it receives at home, and that the visiting club when it plays in Chicago receives three or four times as uch as whenit plays in its own city, orat any point outside of Chicago. As Chicago has entertained cach of the other clubs six times in this city, they have ail had a liberal share of idlers’ half-dollars which Chicago has always bestowed on this game, while the Chicago club has reaped but a comparatively seant harvest irom its return visits to the League cities. We are right, then, in saying that were it not fur the support given to base- ball in this city it would not be possible to maintain this itinerating League. <As It is, the probabilities are that some of the clubs will disband at the close of the present sea- son, and, unless new clubs be organized, tne base-ball business will go to pieces, Last year the Cincinnati club found it so hard to pay expenses that it demanded the privilege of selling liquor at the games, ana, this being refused, the club withdrew from the League. ‘The game has of late years unquestionably Jost much of public interest throughout the country. Whether this is due to any degen- eracy in the playing, or any suspicion that the games are crooked, or sold for betting purposes, or whether the public is getting tired of it, we will not undertake to say; but in this city there is interest enough in it still to draw 3,000 to 5,000 persons away from their business, if they have any, for halfa day when a game is announced. Some of these persons have become veterans in their attendance. They are really unhappy if anything prevents the game. No considera- tion of home or. family, sick wife orchildren, demands of business, or terest of employers can stay the craving to see the game every time itis played. ‘The season in Chicago Is, however, finished, and the city is to be con- gratulated that the nuisance is abated till next year. ————_—— Hints to Fhoxe Who should Advertise. In last Monday’s Trisune we gave some reasons why newspaper-ndvertising was both more economical and more comprebensive and effective in its results than the commercial traveler asa pioneer of trade. The next ques- tion.in order fs: What class of goods are bene- fited by newspaper advertising? We answer, first, all articles that bear a trade- mark, and more especially all articles that are intended for personal or household use. In the first place, the sole use of a trademark fs to pro- tect the interest of the maker, and the more widely it is Known the better for the manu- facturer, both as respects the retail dealer and the consumer. When the trademark is widely known the consumer relics on it as the best evi- dence of the quality of the article to which. it is at- tached. Tho’ Frodsham, the Jurgensen, the Waltham, and the Elin watches are all bought on tho rep's>on which the trademark implies, and the mrs are thus enabled to dictate their own terms to the rerail trade. On the other hand, the retail trade have a natural repugnance to selling gouds that bear a trademark, because they instinctively know that goods that beara trademark must be sold onaclose margin, and that competition is sure to reduce their profits on popular goods, and the retail deuler, in self-defense, puts bis own mark on goods whenever he cn. In this way his profits arc assured, and altboush bis com- petitors have similar govds the fact cannot be demonstrated in a way to affect the price. This is ‘the sole reason why the best class of retail dealers’ refuse to recommend certain makes of goods, and when thoy sell thom at all it is be- cause they must,—a good’ deal like pulling a tooth that is past repairing. And this fuct ex- plains another fact, that when the leading re- tail dealers in any branch of trade makea strong opposition to selling certain brands of goods be- cause of the smallness of the marginof profit the manufucturers must yleld on the matter of Profit or uppeul to the consumer to demand tho Specified article and to insiston getting it, and experience bas dethonstrated that the manufact- urer invariably, gaing bis point and vastly in- creases his sales xmongst the smaller deulers. Chicago is the largest and cheapest market in the world for food products, and still the West- that its tolerance by the police is a matter ot surprise, even in a city where, as a sport- ing man once terscly expressed it, “you exn play any kind of a game from juckstraws to manslaughter.” The particular evil referred to is the racing indulged in at night by the drivers of ‘American, Adams, und United States Express Compuanies’ wagons, and the unwieldy vebicles in which the mails are transported about the city. 1t is frequent- ly, In fact almost daily, the case that by reason of trains arriving here late the utmost expedi- tion must be used by the express companics und Post-Ollice olliciu!s in transferring express mat- terand mails from one depot to another. In order to effect this result the heavily-laden wagons are sent thundering through the prin- cipal streets with the horses on a dead run, and the spectacle of citizens fleeing for thoir hives from these engines of destrvction may be seen any evening in the vicinity of the principal de- pots. In thoduytime this style of racing is not practiced, except in tho’ case of wagons which enrry goods from South Water strect to the trains leaving the. city at 10 o'clock, and on which most of the fruit and vegetables retailed by merchants in suburban towns is shipped. The other morning an American Express wayon'dashed wildly into @ crowu of people ut the corner of Dearborn and South Water streets and succeeded in crushing one man'sieg. ‘Lhat people are dot Killed or in- jured every night by the criminally reckless driving of express and mail wagons trying to catch the late trains is becuuse residents of Chi- cago bave learned to look for theta and‘keep out of the way. There need be no difficulty in secur- Ing evidence that will convict these men if the Superintendent of Police wili only order his sub- ordinates to attend to the matter. Some duy the victim of a reckless express-wagon driver will draw a pistot and bring down the strect tyrant from his lofty perch, and he will not be tried for iurder either. : rr A whiter in Seribner’s Monthly, under the caption of “ Purchasable Health,” offers some timely observations which overworked business-men would do well to heed, * Money,” be says, ** will not purchase health out of s¢n- son, but health fs to be had for money under proper conditions.” There are thousands of men in every large city who are bankrupting themselves in neultn, “Col. Thomas Scott car- ried his burden go long that the four iniilions be had won had no power to bring back the health he had parted with; but there were undoubted- ly times in his life when, by the proper expendi- ture of money and of time, he could have brought heaith enough to last him a brace of decades longer, and to enable him to double the number of his millions for his heirs.” Money can buy health in two ways. It may enable the possessor of it to set aside a vart of each day for recreation, or it may justify him in giving up two months of every yeur tovlid rest. The same writer shrewdly observes: ‘There is a batiucinanon, cherished by a great multitude, that they must be constantly tn their ‘own business, or {t cannot possibly go on pros- perously. Some of these men are so untortu- nately organized that they cannot believe that anybody living can do their work ns well #3 they ean du it. It takes sn enormous 6elf-couceit to come to such 2 conclusion us this, and there is a greut misfortune init. Of course, these men &P2 never able to leave. their work for a moment am other bands, and so they become the bond slaves of their own mistake. Now, there is nothing? in which a grext business-man shows his greatness So signaliy xs in his ability to find men to do bis work.—to ud competent instru- ments to execute his purposes. The greatest business-mun ig always a man of comparative leisure. His own work is always deliberately done. It is, asa rule, the small man who never xets & moment,-and who never cun tind a pair of hands as good as hisown. If a man cannot leave his business, or thinks he cannot, he shows that he lacks the highest grade of busi- ness capacity. How few men of businegs there are in Chicago who are able to show the bixher wisdom of first getting competent assistants, and then trusting routine aifairs unreservedly to their hands. —————— Tne following letter, written by Gen. Gar- field just one year before he was shot, to.an hour, will be read with peculiar interest at thie time. The letter bas not been in print until now, bav- ing been sent to the editor of Tus True within a day or two by Mr. Dalzell, to whom it was written. It contains the President's proph- ecy of his fate: Menror, O., July 2, 1880.—My Dear DALZELL: I bave your letter, and thunk you torit. I know you are very sincere when you say you congratulate me on the. result at Chicago: but to me there is something sad about it all, that [ suppose neither you nor any man in the world except myself can understand. : Yet [ rejoice thut 1 have so many true friends; at least my letters would seem to indicate that. 1 bave written to Jewell to give you a promi- nent plaice in the canvass, though I doubt very much the propriety of iny having anything to do with matters of that sort. 1 am obliged to you for all your kind words at every stage of my progress, and in no formal sense subscribe iyself, as ever, your friend, J. A. GARFIELD. a ‘Tne attention of the Mlinois Humane Soci- ety is called to certain unlawful acts which take Place daily nt the compulsory tectotal meetings being held at Lake Bluff. A prominent feature of each day's proceedings bas heen the experimenting with very bad Whisky upon dumb and defenseless animals, the pro- fessed object of these experiments be- ing to demonstrate the evil effects of whisky on the human system. Last Wednesdity Mrs. Ilarris (who bas charge of this branch of tem- perance work) succeeded in killin a frog by this means, and Thursday, according to the report, “uw chicken was given five spoonfuls of ‘tangle~ foot’ whisky, and in a short time its own tungled fect proved the quality of the Hquor.” Tho ‘Killing of one harmless auimal and the infliction of torture upon another must bave been very edifying. If the Humane Society will send an agent to Lake Luff his time might be profitably employed in puting a stop to such exhibitions. a Tne editor ot the Cincinnati Gazette has stopped fighting the buttle of Shiloh long enough to remark that— Tho development of ceramic art, which is 80 awakening the enthusiasm of American women, hus {ts drawbacks. It may be very pleasant and harmless to decorite vases and suucers, but the trade of a potter {s only tess unhealthy tbun that of a needie-grinder. English statistics, based on the 40,0u) or more potters in the United Kingdom, show that the death rate is 38 per cent greuter umong them than among men at large. Post-mortem exuminations have shown that the lungs of workmen get Sled up with silica, alumina, and oxide of iron. It is only a great editor that, when his wife enuxes him to buy a majolica pitcher with the picture of n stork on one side and « sunflower on'the other, ean sit calmly. down and write abont oxide of iron, silica, aluminu, ana other scientific articles. Most men would buy the crockery and swear a little to themselves. $$$ Sm ALEXANDER Campnect, who has lately been appointed Minister of Justice in Canada, bas performed his first two official acts. No. 1 was the dismissal of a person who did not. agree with him politically, and No.2 was the pardon of abrute from the Penitentiary who had disfigured his wife with vitriol. It will be phatia ham commands double the price at re- tail that the Chicago ham does. European canned meats and canned vegetables are every- where preferred to the native article—and why is iti Tho manufacturers of canned meats rely wholly on the trade, protect the retail interest in its profit, and rarely or never address the consumer at ull,—and still the example of Hav- ermeyer und Elder in advertising the quality of their sugars is familiar to them ull. That of the Royal Baking Powder Company and Steele & Price is to the samoeffect. Lea & Perrin, the |. English makers of sauce, and many makers of similar goods in England, point in the same di- remembered that Sir Alexander Campbell wes recently Postmaster-Generalof Canada. Viewed in this light, his public acts are not strange, for the mun who would hook United States mail- bags would do most anything else in the'cal- endar. ——<$<—<—<——a ‘Tue proposition to forma new State ont of the southern counties of California cannot come to anything. - If such a State should be organized it would in a short time be ng value- less as Nevada. There is no demand for a new State on the Suuthern Pacific. Slope at. present excepton the part of a few seedy politictans wno desire to become Senators and State of- rection; Colgate; the New York soap manufact- ficers, Tho experiment in Nevada is sufiictent munities on equal ‘terms as: members of tha: Union. Thelr prosperity is nptto be fitful and temporary. When the mines are exhu:ted their. importance has vanished. Nevada is now on ‘the verge of bankruptcy. + Tho popuig. How of tho Stato is not larger than ‘that of q| single ward in Chicago. Yetit basa Govern.” ment that would sutlice for the needs of an Em. pire. Its people are crushed under the, bunieng of taxation. ‘There is a constantly increasing * deficit. The flnanctal future of the State jy. gloomy. It has no reauurces, no means of growth or development, no inducements to offer to Immigration, and little or no enterpriga among the people. ‘The real concera of the people of the Puclile Slope should be to tind some way of disposing of Nevda decently; nog toincumber the Union with the support of an. other weak sister. Wrat Gen. Arthur will do is a question: * of vastly more is:portance than what he hag done. He is called. upon to assume new and grayg responsibilities which neither he nor bis advisors could have conceived of. What impropriety is there in saying wad believing chat he will as President of the United States recognize differ: ent obligations from those which formerly rested upon nim us Collector caf the Port of New York?. Hels no man’s mun. If-he be. comes President, he will be the official repre sentative of 59,000,000 peopfe, urid not of any clique or faction. He could pay no. tribute to the memory of the dead Presidunt that would be more impressive thin the contiouance in of- fice of bis advisers. a Soutnenn CAatrronnta, having” become dissuzistied with Nurthern Cudifornia, is moving for # secession, so that it may set up 23a separate State, und to this end # convention haa been cutled to meet in Los Angeles and prepare the way tor it. The proposition is 2 somewhas novel one, but exceed.ngly impractical, tor if. every partof aState which is dissatisitea with every other purt of 2 State should amputate itself from the rest the number of States in the Union would soon become appallingly larg, THene has been a marked diminution in the number and amount of faitures In Great Britain. There were 13.12 insolveacies ceport- ed in 1879 and only 10,2us in 1: ‘Tho Mabilities in the former yeur were 315,000,050, and in the latter $20,599,090; the assets were $50,600,000 and’ $23,509,000 respectively. But if tho grain érop for this year does not turn “out better than ig now expected there may be an increase in tha record. Se WE notice with regret that Mike MeDon- ald’s racehorse is gradually overshadowing Muyor Hurrison as one of the attractions at Coney Island, having finished third in a steeple. chase the other day. Mike's borse cannot make speeches at picnics, however, and when tie Mayor returns to Chicago he will have a decided advuntage over tho uther represdatative from Kentucky. os Ir was eight weeks, fifty-six days, Laie hours, yesterday at 9:3) a. m. since the Pres dent wus shot, and no waking hour was wholly -free from pain. In history Gartleld will dispute with Lincoln the title of “The Martyr Presie dent.” ae SMAKSPEARE wrote “A Comedy: of Er- rors” about 300 years ago. Mr.Egbert Jatilesom got outa second edition of the work about a month ago. He calls it “The Revised Ordi- nances of the City of Chicago.” ror’ How oFTEn was the parallel between Line ¢oln and Garfield instituted before the election; yet no mau tooked for the melancholy sequél. * Mn. Cuances Fraxcts ADAMS has goné eruising in bis yacht. This explains why Ven-'‘ nor’s cold wave failed to appear last week. . Gop reigns, and the Government at Washe ington still lives. . PERSONALS, ~ “My I—g is getting better.”"—Ifaud S. M. Ambroise Thomas remained a bachelor until 68 years of age, and is now sorry he lived so long. “Yes, You May Kiss Me, but Don’t You Tell Pa,” is the utle of the latest song. Itis very evident that this girl was not addressing ‘a Chicago young man. In the free and boundless ‘West the boys never tell pa. In this section the old men all wear box-toed boots. At is interesting to learn from a Mr. For mander, who is authority on Polynesian sub- jects, that by “his wifo Kaikilanimaipanto Lono had two sons, one called Keawebanauika- wal and the other Kaihikapumahuna, of whom the first was the husband of Akubikameenoa, the daughter of Akuhillikapu. and Kabakuma- kulina.” If Lono had called his tirst boy Mike, instead of Keawehucauikawalu, be would havc ‘saved Mrs. Lono a god. deal of trouble wher. she was trylog to get the young man up in tr” morning. “Here, take it, *tis empty! and fill it again With wine that has grown old in the wood, ‘That in its proprietor's cellars has lain So long that ut least it goes back to the reign Of the famous Noshirwan the Good. “3Vith wine which the Jovial friars of old Have carefully tald up in store, In rendiness there for the feast days to hold, With liquor, of which if # man should be told, . He'd roll away drunk from the door! “The damsel who goes toand fro with the glass Shames the pliant young braneh of the tree, With so graceful und gentiean airdoes she pasa: [' dring all the night witha merry young lass, -, Who's both lovely and loving to met —Oshkueh Fotk-Song. Cincinnati is growing more and mort esthetic. A Japanese. pottery. painter from Tokio bas been hired to tench his art to tne female devotees of ceramics over there. His name is Iehiduska Kenzo. It would took well. on a plate itself, but the average Cincinnatian loves tu eat bis pork chops on a platter which , has on it a picture of. a green crane standing on one leg ina red alfalia field, talking to u yellow goose circling Inn crome yellow sky. Still, not- withstanding all this refinement of taste, the circus agents report that when they hang out their intlammatory bills in Cincinnati, some of the best citizelis in the town come und sit on the, sidewalk and gaze for hours at the gory picture, of the rhinoceros ripping up an elephant with a shoemaker’s paste horo.—Envious St. Lois Edttor. a “Tam very rich, my darling,” she sald softly, punctuating her sentences witn soft, warm, kisses. “Already I bave &1U)) worth of 4 per ts registered.in my name, und when the leaves are turning red In the golden October days and the. fields ure laughing in the rich noundance of a bountl+ ful harvest, [shall eut olf the coupons, Ant when! papa dies he will }eave me nearly #290,0W more. Yes my sweetheart, I am a very huppy girl,” und a fair young head nestled contidingly on the suoulder of the strong-limbed, hazel-eyed young man to whom this avowal was made.- He looked tenderly down a& the brown tresses und the invisible net that bond them tu the fairforebesd. Gently lifting the beau tifu! face tw hls, he pressed a passionate kiss on the full, red Ilps that seemed only made for osculation. Turning bis head away, Herbert Ainslelsh ap fora mumentto be wrapped in thought, ‘Thea 2se ing Mirlam with a rick, warm, two-for-a-quarter Hiss, he said: “Dv you love me, Birdie?” res: She gave answer by placing her soft, white arms around his neck, snd throwing herself madly 65 shirt front. “Do not hug so hard, darting, ’an you love me, 0F my collar-stud will raise a carbuncle on the back of my neck,” he said in low, mellow tones. “Its only the deep, pusstonate longing of my lov® Herbert. It recks nut of carbunclos. But you are right. ‘Too much pressure on the cervical vertebra will cause an exostosis. “Sy Professor of Anatomy, told me that” 5 * And we will be married in the fall, my sweet?” “Yes, Herbert, in the rich, hazy, sensuous days Of Indian summer, when the low note of the farmer's boy seeking the lostcow js heard as he sits on tho vine-embowered stite and blasphemes until the tre tly leaves foracooler spot, You must take all my money, Herbert: It mast be yours to doas yuu will with It; to attate the glorious fame chat awaits JOU. forlknow that my love's name will some day De known through the length and breadth of the lend. Surely, you have an ambilon?" * ~ L have,” suld Herbert, kissing her while she caoghs her breath. “And you will not let any false pride standin the way ofusing my money to attalo the hight you fala would reach?’ os “No, darling, [will not. You say you have $1000 indpercents. It is enough. ‘To-morrow I will ach and in less than aduy my nume will be as familiar, throughout the world as that of Encland’s proud Queen.” * “On, Herbert, what will you do?” “shall purchase Maud S.” ‘Two minutes later 0 bimian form fell with adall thug on the front porch of the haughty pork-packer's residence. It was Herbert Alnsicigh. The old maa had fired him. ons.—Frous " Hints to Parents,” by Hale) stead, 3 : =