The Bismarck Tribune Newspaper, June 3, 1931, Page 8

THE BISMARCK TRIBUNE, WEDNESDAY, JUNE 3, 1931 eae RoSe TRIM A ET REN ie alae ECO at AEA Ce corn plasters—under “T've listed phone calls under amusements. Where would you put the clothes budget?” TO MAKE CONVERSATION “When a beautiful woman passes it is human to stop and look,” says a minister. But some say it is best to| pick a homely one if you want to| listen.—Life. THE ENEMY RETIRED Strategy broke up a revolution in| one Central American republic, we hear. When the government forces retreated they left their bedding be- hind them.—Life. AREN'T HUSBANDS CUTE? Wife: How do you like the potato salad? Hubby: It's delicious. buy it yourself?—Life. Did you DEFINITION | A state highway is a magnificent * stretch of road lying between two de- tour signs.—Life. One unusual feature is a so-called bachelor’s chamber with a fireplace and @ private bathroom. The maid's bedrooms and bath are conveniently located and are reached by a private stairway—New Haven (Conn.) Jour- nal-Courier. SIGNS OF THE TIMES Girl (spurning suitor): I weuldn’t | leave my happy home for any man. | Youth (brightly): All right, we'll) live here.—Life. | Mistress—Now are there any ques-| tions you would like to ask? New Maid — Yassum. Where-all shall Ah put vo’ car after Ah gets mine in de garage.—The Pathfinder, “Millie's father likes the young sheiks.” “An eye to business, my boy. He owns a ukulele factory."—The Path- finder. modern NOW YOU TELL ONE THE BUSINESS GETTER Mary: in the beauty parlor! think of that? They've put my picture up What ¢o you Kitty: I suppose they put a “be- | fore” sign on it!—Pathfinder. LET’S DETOUR “The only sensible road to prosper- | ity is to live within our income, says an editorial. But few of us would |eare to be such misers.—Life. WASTED INTEREST “I've never seen a millionaire who didn’t dress conservatively,” says & Fifth Avenue tailor. Then we've been staring at vaudeville actors.—Life. BETTER SUBSTITUTES A dietician urges spaghetti as a substitute for potatoes. We would rather eat strawberries as a substitute | | for spinach.—Life. Teacher—Jimmie, can you tell me how matches are made? Jimmie—No ma‘am, but I don't | blame you for asking. Teacher—What do you mean? Jimmie — Well, mother says you have been trying to make a match for 30 years—The Pathfinder. THAT'LL LEARN ‘EM A prominent official says it !s pub- licity that “makes” Capone and other noted gangsters. We should adopt the methods used by the police and completely ignore them—Life. ACROSS Solution of Yest 1, Outside piecs of a sawed Daily Cross-word Puzzle erday's Puzzle . Badger-like los “oj animal 6. Place of cone teat Medical fluid Nominal value of stock Pertaining to Craft the mouth . Hawaiian wreath 2. Plunged into water 33. Escape br cape Distress signal . Danger ; Not so old . Took up again §. Small wheels . Lares . Accustomed: var. » Withdraw . More crippled rock 48. Stroke lightly 70 Biratchied 1 BL Leng ;leseed 71, Vehicle on 52. Plane trees: runners var. DOWN 65. Nominal . Cease 58. Associate 2) Italian, coin 62. First man 3. Winglike °. Inclining 1. E: 12) 3. Cards bearing . Exhibit ostene tatiously st d_ covering lower holder . Run away with a lover ectant ticipation ployed 60, curely Princely Itall- an family the greatest 61. Tall grass number of stem spots . From: German { THE GUMPS—A KISS IN THE DARK WELLS ‘TNIS WILL BE THE END ME GOOSE HANGS HIGN- JOM CARR'S WILDEST OF THAT NONSENSE — NOW THERE'S WHERE } DIFFER WITH YOU- BIMBO = ON THAT ONE VVE TRIED AND TRIED TO GET THE WIDOW ON THE PHONE ALL AFTERNOON= THIS EVENING NER PHONE WAS SHE ACTUALLY 3 BEEN 7) GAN STAND JUST SO MUCH oe igeD= AND 5 MORE = m ee BUSY FOR HALF AN HOUR = SO } MEAN = IT 1S DIFFICULT TO NOBODY WILL MAKE A STROLLED UP TO HER HOUSE = AND LET THAT FOOL POINT You ME = FIGURE QUST WHAT HIS SAP ouT OF ME — WHAT DO YOU THINK 1 SAW ? KISs SHE LET THA eso hb hes IN'S THAT TOM CARR THERE IN THE Moonen KIsS FOOL HER- t THE GIGANTIC on = AGAIN ON THE Pine Si, — } Bur HE IS ‘WORTH OUND NER = | MILLIONS = HIS ARMS AR! | KISSING HER : | ANDY GUMP HAS GOOD NIGHT — 44 : , i $250,000. WORTH OF r | STOCK TUCKED UP HIS ] SUREVE AND 1S LAUGHING = et pe | ZANDER, | RADE CHALE A MILLION, OOS RAS PAID SCOOGE JN_FULL~ AND WHILE THE WORLD LOOKS ON HER AS A RICH WOMAN- SHE 18 PENNILESS = But HAPPY IN HER LOVE FOR TOM AND UNCLE BIM ? WELL~ WE'LL TURN To THE NE ‘USS. Bat. OFF, Comyrtghe. 1981 ara by The Chicas Tribume Sass << * IF | FIX THIS SUMMER INT YW; THERE, THERE COTTAGE UP AND GIVE IT WALT, WHERE } WHO ME? Nes 1 WHAT You 01D, BUT \" PHNLLIS, +m WAS WERE You {! WAS — KNOW Nou EXACTLN. | JUST a sf ra TO PHYLLIS FOR AN YOU'RE TRYING TO NOTHING. NOU'VE\_ 4 TODAN?2 THAT (IS — DID. WAS HAD TO GO OUT : ‘ ANNNERSARY PRESENT. c {| WENT OUT T 2] ON A LITTLE CONCEAL SOMETHING / BEEN WORKING 100) ILL HAVE TO DECIDE PRETTY UTED TO | eS MILE TrEDSINGSS* Ne FROM . ME. HARD AND YOUR SOON. | LOVE TO COME a NERNES ARE ALL OUT ANDO WANDER > UPSET.” AROUND (7. N “" SHOMMSIROGVIESIEN.. C WeRE ITIS! THE cops) Ml WE Have To PULL OUT, FRECKLES... ‘ ey HAD THEIR HANDS ON IT 7 \NERE AN HOUR LATE AND IT'S HARD FRECKLES t©oeo For A weex...B0T ) weir...cers AN NEVER KNEW IT. AN” TELLIN’ WHATS IN STORE FOR ME neice. eae oer AND His ; T HOPE FARBAR CHOKES WHEN WE 6&T INTo THE ALL THIS... FRIENDS | AN; IF You DON'T FOR GETTIN’ ME IN MIND ME SAYIN’ THis JAM — y T= You Loo. BUT THINK WHERE LoTs BETTER ‘YOU AN YouR WHOLE WITH A BIE TRAIN WOULD 8g, IF MUSTACHE , 1 HADNT STOPPED A BINKLEY! ‘YOU FROM DRINKIN’ Toot! h By Blosser ‘ TLL TAKE The RENT ” ' : : . UTS OnLy THe MERE, I GOT THE CASH HELLO! 1 MRS. RoacH: WON'T You COME IN? MOM'N | BLL For WE / WITH ME. OU CAN Ron “BRANDY’'S BARKING) YOO LIM RICHEY TM HOING A FEW FRIENDS POP RENT GIVE IT To THE JANITOR aewpty DOESNT DISTURB You/ ACROSS THE HALLII| OVER FoR TEA. 1D Love 1 GOTTA DASH FOP RR AWHILE — HE'S SO SPOILED—[1'm So GLAD TO HINE You! r THE OFFICE 4 = I'M MRS. ROACH-/ To KNOW 3 Pe | A New Friend! By Cowan HEY, 5AM, (© TOU'RE GorA' 7 THAT. GARDEN PARTY TONIGHT Youd BETTER GO HOME NOW— ILL FINISH, WITH jaT cusTOmER / WS SECONDS AFFARS ARE WWE COUNT , ATTENDED SY FARST UPON THE 6CENE !! Ae sucn (GOSH, GU22, KITTY'LL SKIN ME ALIN (E1104 CATE. FOR, THAT POWAWOW f SOK oun WHERES MY HAT, 00 YA KNOW? GEE, (TS LUCKY YOU NOTICED IT OR /'DA GONE Home WITHOUT IT! - “ AND A PAYSICIAN , IS NOT SANCTIONED GY OFFICIALS, Ry