The Bismarck Tribune Newspaper, May 15, 1931, Page 12

“Yeah, who took the one with the candied cherry on top—what I was saving for this regular customer here?” NOW YOU TELL ONE Lyon—So you had a burglar in your; Mrs. Snapper—They tell me you apartment last night. I thought I entertained the neighbors informally hheard someone screaming for help. |last night. Your wife I suppose. Baer—Don't fool yourself. the burglar saw my wife he became 80 terrified I thought the poor fellow} would go crazy. | When Kjerulf—And she is such a contrast | to me. Bjscz—Yes, I've heard she is very] smart and capable. Artist—It took me 10 years to com-| plete that canvas. Friend — Incredible! 1 agine it. Artist—I took a month to paint it| and the remaining time to sell it. can't im- Hoax — Why do you call your car “Regulator?” Joax—Well, don’t all the other cars | go by it? | Tillie—I didn't know you studied sign painting at coflege? Archie—I didn’t but I had a flivver. | Rubbout—There seems to be a sur- plus of rubber on the market row. Fillin—Then the crossword puzzle must be dying out at last. | Gold—Has opportunity ever knocked on your door? | Medal—No, but I certainly am on, its mailing list. | Snip—I had my voice tried | Snap—What was the vedict? { Snip—Fine. Snap—Were you able to pay it? Mrs. Rapper—Yes, I had a furs with my husband on the front porch! Smart—Apples have relieved a lot jof unemployment. Smarter—Yes, and they put Adam to work, too. Mary—They've put my picture up in the beauty parlor! What do you think of that? Kitty—I suppose they put a “Be- fore” sign on it! Snip—I lost my entire fortune in Wall Street yesterday. Snap—That so? Snip—Yeah, I was standing on a corner and dropped my quarter and it ran down a sewer. Mabel—Do you know, your fiance is a riddle to me. Anna—Yes, I know. up myself. I'm giving him Willie—Pa, what do standing arm- ies sit on when they are tired? Pa—The seat of war, my boy. Oldwed—Does your wife know the traffic rules? Newed—No, but then she’s young and good-looking. Judge—How fast was she driving when she passed you? Officer—Well, the bulldog on the |seat beside her looked like a dachs- | hund! Harry—Ruth has such a pa‘roniz-| Nitt—Being big-headed never got ing air. Henry—She should have. of her best patrons. Im one anybody anywhere. Witt — How about the fellow who passes the hat? | Daily Cross-word Puzzle | Solution of Yesterday's Puzzte ACROSS L Lethargie states 6. Extra part 21, Juice of a tree 14. Proverb Jt) 13. Grew white 19. Sign 21. Devour 24 Part of a E3 WJ 16. Guido's nigne est note 17. Ingredient of ‘varnish 18 Handful of Ss A 1, Artist's stand N E R pelts ME 25. Swiss river . Rose to a . Excite ant- mosity in QOREIWIG) 37. Award for valor 38. Leave out 39. Broo! 40. Sluggish 42, Devoted ad- herent 43. Southern con- stellation IR A Ss IT A GJ G)C) IR 48. Forbid 46. m|0|—| OME @|/2)—|2|2/—|=z/-4 FOE) DOLE OMIWEEEEIC) bE 5 Q great height L o IN Covered wagon . Coat with an Malady 47. Fruit ‘pre- WWE) OWES OMJRJOb OILJWEIEIG im) <| >| 2 RRS |—|>/0) RIPE) GCE CG) hie Cay tn and lea 54. Gypsy le . Citrous fruits °* Sppey, pocket . Japanese sash 55, El watt . Eager with tad! aber land: abbr. expectation 56. Kind of fruit . Surfaces a 57. Inhabitant of: A Lang suffix . So be it 59. Give for 4. Statute ia Barked hoarsely up Melodies Fodder pit Day's march European tish Parsonage Of later origin Masculine nickname . Ire 47. Shake 48. Heating de- vice 60. Straight lines cutting curves serves 49. Expire 50. European country 51. Cut off tn Dronouncin; 82. Healed “a 53. Bite of an ine sect 5. Other 60. Genus of the Virginia willow 61. Softens and bleach DOWN Vehicle on wheels Poem Reduce to pulp Xchange premium Apprehendea through the 2 see oe senses . Stiteh : Bucket Item of prop- erty . Rebukes . The: Spanish |. Disunite . Winged THE BISMARCK TRIBUNE, FRIDAY, MAY 15, 1931 2 THOUGH REFUSED ANOTHER LOAN FROM SCOOGE = AND CHASED OUT OF NIS OFFICE ~ HENRIETTA ZANDER, HAS PUT AN ORDER IN THROUGH HER BROKER FOR AN ADDITIONAL $10,000.28 WORTH OF STOCK= WHERE WILL SNE GET THE $10,000.00 £ SHE IS RACKING HER BRAIN= HER LAST JEWEL. DAWNED — SNE 18 PENNILESS- IN THE MEANTIME NOONE GIVES A “THOUGHT To UNCLE BiM — WHAT WILL BECOME OF HIM ae WHAT'S THIS NOU CUT OUT OF THE PAPER, PHYLUS? mmcnme ete AND IS | \ Wcsr FRIENDS | ‘out or AND, WHILE SHE CHATS NTH HIM IN ANOTHER, ROOM, A FIGURE * PROWLS AROUND By IN BACK “C'MON UP ON MAIN STREET WITH SALESMAN ME, SAM—/ Wena Look OVER THAT) LETS Go f PIECE OF REAL ESTATE MY UNCLE | MADE ME A PRESENT OF — SAM COMIC STRIPS AND FEATURES i 7 Buy ALL OF His st THAT | CANS STOCK TT WILL BE WORTH TWENTE FIVE TIMES WHAT | PAID FOR [T= WHO CAN | BORROW THE MONEY FROM ? KNOW THAT, JUST A LITTLE PARAGRAPH ABOUT ONE OF MY OLD CLASSMATES. (TS “THERE ON THE TABLE. 1 HAVE IT = A SCHEME = MY LIFE INSURANCE - AS A LAST RESORT= 1 CAN BORROW MONEY ON THAT= OTHER SIDE ISA WANT-AD ABOUT A COTTAGE AND A LOT ON THE SHORE OF A LAKE FOR SALE WHEN T HEARD MR-BisTZ\ GEORGE HEARD SOME: Yeu, THER! THIEF tue \ ONE COMING UD THE THE GUMPS—RISKING HER ALL i i “THE CASH SURRENDER OR LOAN VALUE ON MY POLICY iS A LITTLE IN EXCESS OF $10,000. © = ‘LL 8E RIGHT GOLLY, "'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT SOMETHING OF THAT KIND FOR THIS SUMMER. IF ITS NGAR ENOUGH TO ORIVE BACK AND WORTH SAND DOLLARS! i - Woe OF STOCK THAT ILL terns , Nabe ENE Fe earns INV ESTMENT ENO! To PAY OFF SCOOGE= GET THE NOTE s THAT HE agg 1M GOING To PHONE HIM FROM THE CIGAR STORE. WOULDN'T (T BE SWELL IF I COULD GET IT READY AND GINE (T TO PHYLLIS FOR HER WEDDING ANNINERSARY _ TOP OF HIS LUNGS, T Took | HALL AND HAD JUST MY APRON OFF AND DASHED] PEEKED OUT wo SEE INTO THE HALL. MR BLOTZ, / HO IT WAS, AND WE WHITE AS DEATH, WAS San We WERE PK HANGING ON To THE Tuer / THE PAPER AND MILK- BY THE COLLAR AND-, THere SHE Is, sam! (INTEND TO BUILO ON (TT some DAY — oKer— WAY OF COURSE , ALLY <= WEVE PASEED LE HAVRE > A N'COME RIGAT ON UP IMAGINE WANING A WALK-BOTTLE TwieF AWING RIGHT DMDER us ! HE WAS JUST LOOKING AT # <1eaHw ! ano TS sHoW MC APPRECIATION, / GoTTa WRITE HIM A, Le Tver - BUT t DON'T KNOW HOW TO WorD IT! GosH, BUT YoU GOTA BIG-HEARTED UNCLE ALL RIGHT! Just sav — THANKS @ Lor’/ LOOK WALIE =O THERES OW ,1¥5 NEAR --1 KNOW | £ ny. TW ENFFEL, TOWER ~ Ati’ oe a DA SRY, GEE, 1 SPOSE WS REY DON'T KINDA SILLY ,BUT--- EVEN KNOW BUT DO YA SPOSE YM comin’ THERE'LL BE A CROWD WAITIN’ ?