The Bismarck Tribune Newspaper, February 5, 1931, Page 10

a “It’s going to be so much easier, now that the judge has given me the care of the children.” | NOW YOU TELL ONE | NO GAMBLING “Our preacher is so strict he won't even perform a marriage ceremony.” “Good gracious! Why’ “He says that his conscience won't permit him to take part in any game of chance.”—Answers. ADVANCE IN NECKING | Fort. Wayne News-Sentinel: They; used to cry on your shoulder. Now! they jump on your neck, | Mr. Doak is determined to deport holdup men, but probably won't both- er those who charge $85 for an apart-| ment like this. i DO YOU GET IT? “I hope, Jones,” said his employer, “that you are saving at least half of | what you get.” { “Well, sir, said Jones, “I would, but | the fact is that I don't get as much as/| that."—Tit-Bits. ly Tr | But how could baffled parents; shift their responsibility to somebody | else if there were no colleges? IT WON'T BE LONG NOW New Yorker: “So you're a moon-} remarked ‘the interested | lanky moonshiner drew him-/ self up haughtily. | “Mister, you got me wrong,” he as- serted, ‘Since pro-hi-bition, weuns| calls ourselves irrigation engineers. HOPELESS YOUTH Daughter: But, daddy, why do you object to my becoming engaged? Is it because of my youth? Father: Yes, he’s hopeless.—Path- finder. HEED THE MORAL Shady Garage Proprietor: How much did you charge him on his car? Mechanic: Fifty dollars, sir. “What was the matter with his en- gine?” “No gasoline, sir."—Passing Bhow. | THE REFRIGERATION MENACE Trumbull Cheer: A policeman was walking his beat in a residential dis- trict when a badly battered house-to- house salesman rushed up to him. “Say officer,” he panted, pointing to a redhead iceman who had just climbed on his wagon. “I want that man arrested. Just look what he did to me!” Stalking majestically into the street, the policeman waved the ice- wagon to halt, and demanded, “Did uu hit this man?” “Oi did,” was the shameless reply. ‘What for?” “Alienation av affections,” replied the iceman. “He sold Bridget Nolan's missus wan av thim electric ice boxes.” CUSTOMARY “If you die first, dear, you'll wait for me on the other shore, won't you?” asked the wife. T never went anywhere yet without having to wait for you.”—Pathfinder. If the people you know seem dumb perhaps you are smart. Or perhaps you aren't privileged to associate with others because they think you dumb. New doctors say nothing but germs can give you a cold, but how do germs know when you are in a draft? Americanism: Shuddering at the thought of butchery in Russia; lynch- ing twenty-five within a year here at home. GOOD TITUTE Chicago News: It was the first donkey small Egbert, 4, had ever seen and he had teased to ride him around the mountain camp until the boy's mother was driven to near-dis- ction.” “Father, for goodness sake, she said at last, “give him a ride on your back to satisfy him.” | Daily Cross-word Puzzle | ss Solution of Yesterday's Puzzle 01 a defeated & Greek letter 8. Obstinate 4. Decorates 5 Highest office in the 0. 8. Le lO Above io swiftly on . Ornament Retracted loot 14. Arabian sea- ort 16. Betas 17. obstruct L 1 Halt em niefly 21. Beam Ss IT Cc iP. A iS ©: 25. Make a mis- au A name Gypsy poeket- book ke 22, standards of |R » Ancient perfection A Young devi 1008 29. Sign of the innitive dra 43. Western Indian Mawaitai . Throws light- 64. Square of three 44. Pertaining to 55. Ancient slave hydrophobia 46 Parent 56. Poisonous serpent 43. Famous fover $7. Bushy clumps tain 50. Motion pie- 41. Brightest iF ture star in @ econstella 52. Become tion 58. Brazilian 43. Note of the money of seale account DOWN 1. Rounded appendage 2. Baking = chamber CE[ARD TIMES ARE KNOCKING AT ‘THE DOOR OF SCOOGE = — AND HE HAS WORN THE HANDLES You CAN'T ALWAYS BE OUT= PAY ME WHAT UMBRELLAS KNOCKING ON THE WIDOW ZANDER DOOR TRYING Jo COLLECT THE MONEY HWE LOANED HER = PReenee HE COULD USE 1T NOW= HE NEEDS rT NESSIR, THEN'RE HIGH= DAY AFTER DAY | COME Yo THIS HOUSE=AND KNOCK ON THE DOOR] V TELEPMONE~ AND GET NO ANSWER] 'M GLAD NOW we . PASSED A REVOLUTION eee! THE Stow 1S DEEPER OUT WERE IN HE COUNTRY... OW WELL, LINDY WILL GET bw AND THe AND HIS | govs age FRIENDS |,,, THEIR way To JIMTOWN, WITH: LINDY GING ALONG IN FINE s™Me, DESPITE THE DEEP SHow ALONG THE £S THE DOOR IN MY FACE@ pers SHE WANTED ME Ir WAS DIFFERENT ~ WHEN SHE NEEDED THE MONEY= SHE WAS GLAD , To SEE ME— WELL = GIRL NOTHIN’! AN! NOU FELLAS ARE LUCKY. YOU HAVEN'T Reg. U.S. Pat. Of; Copyright, 1951, by The Chicago Tribune, ' GIDDAP, LINDY! GIDDAP! HMM... LOOKS LIKE + S) THIN’ OVER OUR RADIO ager Sn LAST NIGHT, SAM, THAT SET ME To “THINKIN t BY GOLLY, ( HEARD SomEe= )MUST GE A DARNED GO0p RADIO You'vVE GOT, ]/WE MUST ALL SPEND CUR MONEY MR. BLANKHEAD! ELLA SAID IN HIS TALK THAT ) (TS EREELY IN ORDER To CHASE THESE HARD Times! BOOTS AND HER BUDDIES Ask Tip—He WAY “H START THINGS Boomin’ AN 6ce_.WuaT CONE ON, WWE NEED IS | oScaR..CONT CONE ON, A SNOW TALK SO WeLL sHover |[\ SHOVEL... ff MUCH AND HIM our NOW, IF EveRYBooy Does HIS \ ’ “ a Bs Re OT ©1001 By REA SERVICE MIKE! sues Gone! GLAOYS!! THERE'S A LADDER UP TO HES WINDOW AND HER=HER BED -'T HASN'T EVEN BEEN SLEPT INI! \ DON'T Neco oNE—BU VUL GtT tT Jest TH SAME— GIMME A 1 XWo CENT Stamp!