The Bismarck Tribune Newspaper, December 22, 1923, Page 4

es 1 J ‘ 1 PAGE FOUR THE BISMARCK TRIBUNE Entered at the Postoffice, Bismarck, N. D., as Second Class Matter. BISMARCK TRIBUNE CO. - - - Foreign Representatives G. LOGAN PAYNE COMPANY CHICAGO - - : - : Marquette Bldg. PAYNE, BURNS AND SMITH NEW YORK - - - - Fifth Ave. Bldg. MEMBER OF THE ASSOCIATED PRESS The Associated Press is exclusively entitled to the use or republication of all news dispatches credited to it or not otherwise credited in this paper and alsv the local news pub- lished herein. rights of republication of special dispatches herein are ed. | Publishers DETROIT Kresge Bldg. sery CRIPTION RATES PAYAD : ADVANCE EDITORIAL REVIEW ———— Comments repsoduced in this column may or may not express the opjnion of ‘The Tribune. They nted here in order that may have both sides ant issues which are being discussed in the press of the day. WHY THE HIGH TAXES DO; RICH” | UR NOT “SOAK THE High income surtaxes, which seize half income, ar gives very great satisfaction to those of us who are not rich. That is why there are men in public life who cppose reducing the her income surtax rates They cppose it because they think that people, bclicving that they are stuucing up for the poor against the rich nN ha to vote for them. They oppose it because they believe thet ordinary people are SU L Daily by carrier, per year. i $7.20 Daily by mail, per year (in Bismarc}:) 7.2) | Daily »y mail, per year (in state outs: 5.00 Daily mail, outside of North Dai« 6.09 THE STATE'S OLDEST (Established 187:)) THE COULTER P!..\% } | H lerated diversification” y)lai Or. Coulter of th liurel college, ‘whicl eing rporated in 2) for presentation in the rhtt r in it th ment of helping individuals to he alor ene Ines, although it smack: o/ i+ nan.s for paternali: tic action by the govr ment, it has much in it to warrant the careful attention members of Con- gress. | That the war impeded a natura! development toward diversified farming in the Northwest is self-evident, al- though compilations of some state departments indicate that greater progress has been made in this regard in the last few years than is indicated by Dr. Coulter’s experts. The war produced an accelerated grain farming era for the Northwest and Canada, and the consequent evil effects have been apparent to all who have not scratched the surface in a study of agrarian tendenc Briefly, Dr. Coulter proposes that the government shall loan money on the character of Northwest farmers who de- sire to diversify and are unable to do so because of their heavy losses in grain farming. There appears to be no other agency by which such loans could be made in many cases. There is the possibility that through such aid a more sound system of agriculture may be developed in the Northwest. ince the Northwest is, and will be for many years, essen- tially an ag ion of the nation, any measure to stabilize its chief busin s worthy of the careful attention of business men and legislators. TOM AND JERRY Many an old-time is recalling the bowl of Tom and Jerry that used to appear in the.center of the bar at the corner saloon, along about the time of year, back yonder before Volstead became famous. That bowl of Tom and Jerry was as symbolic of the holiday season as the holly wreath and the Santa Claus ringing a bell at the curb. It arrived shortly before Christ- mas and seemed always to be filled, though it was emptied many times before New Year. Won’t be many more years until no one will be able to remember the recipe for Tom and Jerry. Customers in the old days had a hazy notion that it was concocted from white of egg, nutmeg, cinnamon, frosting sugar and the fluid that is scheduled to become as scarce as radium or hen’s teeth. Another seasoned reminder of the holidays, back yonder, was the half pint of Kentucky bourbon that the fat andj genial saloonkeeper handed out with the compliments of the jouse. - Now and then some one tries to tell us there’s as much! drinking as ever. But we don’t notice any Tom and Jerry lurking in the background. We don’t observe any fat and genial proprietors passing out half pints of mountain dew. We dont’ see people walking into a liquor shop with an empty suitcase and walking out with it bu —as used to be common, stocking up for New Year. Yes, there are a good many drunks these days, that’s true. But do you remember the wild times the rum hounds used to have on New Year Eve? ld-time newspaper men can recall when the Grill Room Sto) an annual event. Half the town seemed to be lit up to usher in the new year. Ah, we haven’t the heart to torture the thirsty with further reminiscences. But don’t let any one fool you, that there’s as much drinking as ever. Just keep an eye open holiday week, and you will realize prohibition is no joke. | RECOMMENDS EXILE A law, compelling every American to spend a year outside his'country before he is 25, is suggested by President Far- ' rand of Cornell. He believes the perspective trom abroad would open our eyes to some of our faults without weakening | patroitotism. Our notion is that it’d strengthen patrotism, for no one really appreciates the conveniences, pep, prosperity, geniality and ideals ‘of America until he views it from a foreign land. Travel is such a fine educator, all should voluntarily spend a year abroad—even if they travel by cattle-boat. Look what exile to Russia did to Emma Goldman, in her viewpoint toward America. Given a choice of a year in college or a year of travel, choose travel. You can get college at home, studying at night, if you’re willing to work for it. Airplane, the coming means of travel, is potentially the greatest educator. AMERICANS EAT TOO LITTLE After being told, so many times we’d begun to believe it, that we.all eat too much, along comes Kammerer, the Viennese scientist, and makes this observation while visiting New York City: “Examined the American at his meals. . This specimen eats far too little I myself do not believe in gorging. ‘ But even during the worst starvation periods during the war the average European ate more than the average New Yorker.” We Americans call ourselves a lot of false names. eas MORBID GREED Egyptian government, it’s rumored, will put King Tut’s mummy on-exhibition in a glass eage. | While this is the samé-as visiting the local morgue, it'll attract tourists and bring foreign money into Egypt, where it’s badly needed. King Tut probably would approve, if he could see the present impoverished condition of his once mighty empire. : . BUILDING ; Thie- year’s new building construction répresents an out- lay of five billion dollars, totaling the whole country. ’s a fourth more than a year ago. Does it represent increase in building, or largely a price advance? 4 ine the rich” is an utter Met n ‘hat really it lets the rich ait ond so. ks ‘he rest of us for whet t ouch! to be paying. By r on example, a man with fifteen million do'lars inve t- ed in industrial stocks yielding an ersge of six and two-thirds per cent, biingans him an annual in- come of » milion doilars. If h- keeps these investments, the in-ome tax, assuming ‘him to/ de a married min without chidren would take $550.640 out cf his fn- ome. lesving him $ 360. Now thit looks like “souking the rich’ y satisfactor But when the blow falls, the rich man iin’: there any more. He isn’t | there bec he can mzke more ; h quart bottles * too dumb t> see that this claim of mor by moving out of range. He sells hig stocks and invests his fortune in tax-exempt public | socurities yielding’ five per cent. | That makes his gross income $750.- 000 a year. But though this 1s a quarter of a million less than his old income, he gets it all. The government takes none of it. The government tax which he should ‘be paying. the rest of us who can’t get awa) have to pay somehow, directly or indirectly, The rich man who made this switch would get for his own use $300,640 more than ‘he would if he kept his taxable securites. H And only those who are sure that if they were in his place ‘they wouldn't do this thing are free to reproch the rich man for doing it. In point of fact, rich men DO do it. That is why it is estimated that | the high surtax rates that drive Jarge incomes into tax-exempt curities are costing the coun! four hundred million dollars ¢ year that it ought to get out of the income tax but doesn’t. Or, rath- er, it is costing the rest of us that much ‘because the government, failing to get the money from the rich men, has to get it from us. This is why taxable incomes of more than three hundred thousand dollars have shrunk from 1,296 in 1916 to only 246 in 1921—still less now. That is why the total of these higher incomes remaining subject to tax has shrunk from $992,972,986 in 1916 to ony $153,- 534,305 in 1921—and ft is still less now. The fact is clear beyond any pos- sible doubt that the high surtaxes which some statesmen urge to make a show of “soaking the rich” do not soak the rich at all, fut shift their burden to the rest of us, rob industry of the capital it! needs to keep men employed and business busy, and promote ex travagance in local taxation by putting a premium om the free and easy ssue of local bonds. And the “statesman” who thinks! that ordinary meople are too dumb ee this hole through a ladder! pivs 2 mishty poor compliment to the jntelligenre of the average citi- | zen—-Duluth Herald. SS ADVENTURE OF | | THE TWINS | By Olive Roberts Barton’ nee “I'll have to leave you for a few minutes!” said Daddy Gander to the Twins. “I must go and stop that fat old miller from making so much dust and dirt while Mother Goose is away.” The magic dust-pan had shrunk up again to its proper size and Daddy Gander tucked it under his arm. “Make yourselves at home!” he said. I'll find everything com- plete, from rough towels to smooth towels in the bathroom to coffee-tea cups in the dining room. Goodby.” “Oh, wait a minute!” cried Nancy, und she dived into the tiny kitchen of her new Christmas-tree house and came out, again with a brand-new broom. “We're going along, Nick and I are, aren't we, Nick? We're going along to help you clean up after the dusty miller before Mother Goose comes home, so she'll find everything spick and span and not scold,” “Well, well, well!” beamed Daddy Gander, “I certainly do appreciate that. Come right along.” So off they went to Poppleton Bun’s mill. ’ On the way they passed the house that Jack built. And Jack’s mother was out on her porch. “Lock a daisy me! What a muss!’” she declared. “No sooner had I put my pail away after my m6rning’s scrubbing, when puff, poof! Along comes a great cloud of flour dust and chaff like a white soot, and set- tles over everything. Tho miller ought to be sued.” And they passed the shoe house of the ~Old-Wioman-Who-Had-So- Many-Children. a beat. THE BISMARCK TRIBUNE Good AS HE CAN BE You've BEEN A GooD BH For Quilé A SPELL Now — HERE'S YOuR ReaWARD Living Up to Form é LETTER FROM LESLIE PRESCOTT TO LESLIE PRESCOTT, 1 CONTINUED Of course, little Marquise, I hated to have all the scandal take a new lease on life, quite as much as Jack. For a while I didn’t know exactly what to do, then I called up Ruth. Somehow other people can get a better viewpoint on your affairs than you can yourself, Perhaps it is be- cause it is unprejudiced. Ruth came over immediately, as she was anxious to talk to me about the man who was trying to seli me the pearl, as well as my other trou- bles, She looked rather queerly as J told her the reason John gave for not wanting me to go. I would not confess this to anyone but you, little Marquise, but for just a second a look swiftly passed o' Ruth’s fact that made my heart miss It seemed to me that she, for that nice things pass by us unno- ticed. And we do lose a lot by it. But anyway! Daddy Gander and his magic dust- pan and the Twins and their broom finally did reach the screeching, groaning, clattering, grunting mill, with flour dust coming out of all its windows, and went inside. And what a sight met their eyes. No wonder the chaff and flour dust were flying so. fat old miller, was sound asleep and snoring. And every time he snorea out he blew a great cloud of flour dust all over town. Daddy Gander ad the Twins got everything brushed up finally, but hy the time they got the old miller awake and everything, it was time for tea. (To Be Continued.) (Copyright, 1923, NEA Service, Inc.) 3 DON'T THINK t'Lc Go ik WANT To SCE A Comedy THAT’S Goon, ‘Bur NoT TOO ~ EN Goon ! a) Tio )LUTELY {4 i MATE And there she was! “Hoity-toity! she was. saying, “All this dirt, and only an hour ago the children and I got our shoe- ‘house nicely polished, as we are go- ing to have. company! The millec ought tobe jailed.” S And so .it went. Everyone in Mother-Goose Land, or I should say, since. Mother Goose was away, | everyone in Daddy-Gardner Land was so put out that nobody thought of being specially civil to the Twins,, | That's always the way, . We're sv busy bemoening the ho. things Poppleton Bun, the | Tue FUNNIEST Soya c that moment, was thinking perhaps the story of the play was true and it really was John’s own child: I dismissed it, however, as soon as she did, especially as she cleverly suggested a way by which we could probably allay+any suspicions, “Take the baby along, Leslie,” she said, “and I'll send immediately a notice to the society columns of the papers that you have gone to bid your father and mother goodby upon their sailing for England and have taken the baby to see its grandpar- mped up and kissed Ruth, “You are the best friend anyone over had. get me out of all sorts of trou- { ble.” “Perhaps,” said Ruth somewhat dubiously, “but I can’t just arrange a plan by which we are going to cir- cumvent this blackmailing waiter.” “That is one of the reasons I want to go, Ruth. I'll talk to Struble & Struble. Karl said they would fix it up for me some way.” While we were talking John came in, went directly to his room and slammed the door. a “Sounds natural’ said Ruth with a bitter laugh. “Sounds unnatural to me, Ruth. This is the worst quarrel John and I have ever had, and somehow I have an intuition that what we quarreled , about was not the real thing rank ling in his mind.” “What do you ‘mean, Leslié?” “Well, I see I must tell you some- thing that has been worrying me for a Yong while. I’m afraid, Ruth, that Jack in some way got hold of that cablegram or at least a part of it! from Karl.” “Great Scott! complication.” (Copyright, 1923, NEA Service, Inc.) That Would be a’ | EVERETT TRUE BY CONDO | THIS WEEK” DE-SPLITTING . FrOATIONS } BSOLUTELY TH ULTIMATE \ PRODUCTIONS! is The most pathetic reading on earth is a “Shop Early” sign on the day before Christmas. Politicians remind us of fire de- partments. Somebody views with alarm and away they go. Seattle thieves got a car of apples and so far the detectives’ efforts ‘have. been fruitless. Michigan psychologist finds ‘mix- ers make the most money. If he means drink mixers, yes. New York cop's wife hit him, so he arrested her. here’s an idea for husbands. Join the force. Thieves in Shelbyville, Ky., got 70,000 cigarets, or enough to last pool player two days. Chicago boy went to a dance in his underwear. Cops got him, but pneu- monia wanted him. People in Seattle who have noth- ing to dance about are trying to make dances stop early. saree tts The first snow in years and years fell in Arizona and amused the coal dealers very much. Two ‘houses were blown down in He was in Washington. SATURDAY, DECEMBER 22, 1923, . No. 10—Scoring and Paying Scores are computed and differ- ences settled after each hand. When a player declares Mah Jongg, he exposes :the hitherto con- cealed portion of his hand, being careful not ta confuse it with his already exposed, tiles. His score for both concealed and exposed combina- tions is then totaled, including all doubles. If the winning player is other than East, he collects an amount in count- ers from two of the players equal to his points, and twice this amount from East. If the winner is East, he collects INustration A <JONG4 BY '\J.PBABCOCK, : pany nag ht J To this total of 22 (or 24) would be added: t If winning tile was drawn wall, 2 points; : ‘ If winning piece was only possible piece to complete hand, 2 points. In this hand, you would score for only possible place to win if the last tile obtained was the 2 Character, the 3°Charaeter, the 6 Character, tt 2 Bamboo, the 3 Bamboo, or the Bamboo. from Lowest Score Twenty-two is the lowest scoring combination for a winning hand. the above hand, had the three of eee | ine ooo Tlustvation . B Iitustyation. C double from each of the other three players. Paying Up When the winner has been paid, the other three players total their scores and each pays or collects from the other two (except in case of a tie) on the basis of the difference in} their scores. Thus, A scores 20, B 25 and C 35. A pays B 6 and C 16. B pays C 35. In case either A, B or C had been East, he would have paid or collected just double these amounts, as East always pays or col- lects double. ‘ In scoring, tiles can be used in one combination only, and the exposed and concealed hands cannot be mix- kind in Dots been replaced by an- other sequence, the above hand would have scored the consolation bonus of 10. / If on table If in hand For three 4s ... For three Dragons . 8 For Mah Jongg .... a 26 32 Doubling and 3 dragons ..52 64) Doubling. for-all of one \ “suit (except honors) ..104 128 if winner were West in above hand, two more would be added be-, ed, All tiles in the exposed hand| fore doubling for “pair of own must be left in the combinations in| winds.” a which they were declared. SS It'on if in The following model hands will ; table. hond help you fix in your mind methods] Foy ‘three 1s 8 of scoring. For three 6s ... i If on Table If in Hand] y, : 3 For three 38.:... 2 alee eee ee ane For Mah Jongg. 32 (or winning) ..,.20 20 . eee Se — — | Doubling three times for 22 24 all of one suit ........ 208 256 o. after you’ve worn a pair a little | A Thought while. e I will give you a mouth and wis- |dom, which ali your adversaries shall not be able to gainsay nor resist.— Luke 21:15. ene Teach a man to read and write, and you have put,into his hands the great keys of the wisdom box,—Hux- ley. A Modern Giant London—Private Burn, one of the latest recruits in the London Scot- tish Regiment, stre is some tall boy. He stands 6 feet 8 inches. His fath- er, Sir Archibald Burn, is a member of Parliament. a A Blind Heroine Lincoln, Eng—Mrs. Kate Hunt is Pasadena, Calif. Wasn't Hi John-j>lind. But when she smelled burning json. timbers and heard a young woman’s screams, her remaining senses gu The Chinese republic is 12 years|¢d her on. Rushing into a blazing old now and is making fairly good, residence, she found a housewife’s marks at school. clothes in flames. She wrapped the (eee womah in a rug, extinguished the French writer says Germany lost ; flames, then applied oil to her burns, the peace as well as the war. \We | The housewife, however, was beyond eay everybody lost both. medical aid. Better known candidates would be Volstead, Chaplin, Bryan, Lloyd and other famous humorists. Little Feet London’s Latest London—The Chinese foot is the London woman's latest fad. Without Johnny Weismuller, champion swimmer who has been sick is back in the swim again. The baseball season will open April 26, but April Fool’s Day would be more appropriate. Caterpillars are so foolish. they have. invaded Germany. will starve to death, Now They \Philadelphia man stole to buy Christmas presents‘so will find Senta Claus is barred. They jailed four poets in Moscow, proving that even the Russians have fun at times. A doctor leads ahard life. Every holiday he rushes around to people who have eateh: too much. The prince of swindler’ has been arrested in Chicago. Strange, but ‘he was not a coal dealer. , Man making a mountdin out of a mole-hole thinks others are making # mole-hill out of his mountain. What would-you do if you met a robber? ~ Loudest talkers are the ones who grab for the stars. Every winter everybody is sur- prised at ‘the weather. Women are tice people, but would be better. if they didn’t mistake salads for food “Furs,” a Christma: shopper tells us, “do not grow on fir trees.” * Volstead could be elected president quickly by the bootleggers. - Two detectives were fired in Mil- waukee, Wis. If you need some old. clews they may. ‘well cheap. Ae ad “Mg wife’ wants a piano, but I am getting fher home\dishes instead.” What, wi nébd is coal. wave, | that little tiptoeing walk, all the ef- fect of the new oriental gowns would be lost. So milady is buying her shoes from two to three sizes small- er than she used to. But she isn’t kicking about cramped feet.- She is using reducing preparations. And the leathers are so supple, she con=| When Silence Was Golde; WELL-MEANING STRANGER — Perhaps I can help you. There are one or two things I can tell you about your make of car.- MOTORIST—Well, keep them to yourself, there are ladies present.— Bystander (London). Cutting Down es “What has become of that bad curve just outside of Plunkville?” “The town did away with it.” “A good idea,” “Yes, it was. cheaper to do it than to build a hospital—Louisville Cour- ier-Journey, Certainly Appropriate * MANDY—What’s yo’ all going to call your new baby? RASTUS—Weatherstrip. MANDY — Weatherstrip? come? RASTUS—He done kep’ me the draft.—Harvard Lampoon. How 4 we They’d Queer Him LAWYER—Well, what shall ask for—trial by judge or jury? CLIENT—Take the judge, Doc. I've done plumbing for nearly every- body in this town.—Selected/ One That's Banned Current Old Guard fashion hints for the presidential ring put the taboo on the Hi hat.—Norfolk Vir- ginian-Pilot. The thinnest thread visible to the human eye is so ll that it would take a bundle of a thousand of them to equal the diameter of a woman’s hair. These threads are made from melted quartz. _ THE SPIRIT OF CHRISTMAS (By wictenss Borner.) Glad Christmas time has come again, To greet us with the closing year, Sound: “Peace on earth good will to men,” ’ Let voices ring with hearty cheer; Then, let us stand'in happy mbod, te Ei Around the Yule-log’s sparkling blaze, And feeling that all things are good,, ‘Sing out the songs ‘of other days. tends there's very little discomfort lover clasps his sweetheart’s hand, While future scenes before him rise, ‘The magic of a fairy’s wand, ‘Hag filled him with a glad surprise; ~ He seeg himself a goodly squire, ' White children play around ‘his knee— Entranced he gita before the fire, Enwyapped in Love's sweet mystery. The traveler oni his homeward way, , Wi q es is Jaden down, Tomorrow willbe Christmas Day, And dittle children wait at hme, For'roly-poly old Saint Nick, - To come out the land of Snow, Then clamber down the chimney, thick, » And fill each sock from top to toe. ; 7 The dog knows something’s in. the air, TI ‘he can’t spell, dr read a ‘book, He feels that he will get his share, And wage his tail, with hungry look; How good the chiliren all’ appear, {Right willingly they do the. chores, ‘Without a grown, a sign or tear, Then hurry in from out of doors, ‘These pictures, humble though ‘they be, f The spirit show of Christmastide, ‘The toy thedecked and lighted tree, 4 The carols; ng far and wide; Let fun and pervade the air}: ‘And all Joy bells sweetly ring, - \ i . Th eee trom, je lat * 3 Jai use tee irtaay of pur, King. ‘ { The =e | !