The Bismarck Tribune Newspaper, May 14, 1921, Page 4

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a way up you're = yolther up nor down.” t Entered at the Postoffice, Bismarck, wv. D., as. Second i. : THE BISMARCK TR 1BU NE down, but when you're only half Class Matter. | . GEORGE D. MANN. - > ”CEditor | EDITH MAY Foreign Representatives _ The prettiest salesgirl in’ America—Miss Edith G. LOGAN PAYNE COMPANY May Leuenberger. rete Bide. Powe Big. | She’s a real American girl, through and through, : NEW yor TN BURNS AND ote Ave. Bi ag. (28 you'll like her the minute you get to know her j well. ‘The Associated Press is exclusively entitled to the use for publication of all news credited to it or not otherwise) eredited in this paper and also the local news published berei May: Many thousands of salesgirls, the country rein. All rights of publication of special dispatches herein are slso reserved. tion. realize that it had such a fine collection of “prettiest girls.’’ “Edith May won. The Tribune has printed her picture. You'll have ‘to admit that Edith May is a maid good to fook upon! ‘And, better than that, Edith May is a girl any father, or mother, or brother, or husband, would like to have around the house. For Edith May is a ‘‘regu- lar“ girl! ‘ Edith May lives,in Monroe, Wis., where there are no beauty shops, and where, as Edith May herself says: ‘The chanees are limited.”’ Not on the ¢ity’s |boulevards lived this prettiest girl; not in a gilded palace, nor clothed in priceless silks and laces. Edith May is’ the daughter of the village blacksmith and The tariff on imported automobiles and motor|works in a store. Edith May disproves the’ theory trucks is too high and should be redueed from 45 to/that a pretty girl naturally’ inelines, toward idleness. 2 30 per cent, says the petition to Congress from the |“T’m ready to work like'a switch engine,’’ she said. foreign trade committee of the National Automobile! A switch engine is the‘superlative of rapid and long Chamber of Commerce, representing American auto | continued action. 1 i Edith May has never, seen a Parisian frock, nor a makers. . i The British empire has retaliated against our high | !"ifth avenue hat, The world of jewelry is to her un- auto tariff by building tariff walls against American! known, And yet, Edith May has been pronounced the prettiest salesgirl in America! ‘ cars, A British car entering Canada, for instance, is “ MEMBER AUDIT BUREAU OF CIRCULATION SUBSCRIPTION RATES PAYABLE IN ADVANCE Oaily by carrier, per year ...... tenes $7.20 Daily by mail, per year (in Bismarck) . 7.20 Daily by mail, per year (in state outside Bismarc! 5.00 Daily by mail, outside of North Dakota ............ 6.00 THE STATE’S OLDEST NEWSPAPER (Established 1873) Zp TARIFF WARS The age of miracles is not past: Here’s a group of manufacturers actually petitioning Congress to reduce the tariff! { | Hl | Tudges in a national’ beauty contest picked Edith lover, entered the contest. Never before did a na-| favored by a lower tariff rate than an American ear. It appears that if we are going to build up tariffs against foreign goods, the same sort of barriers are tiest salesgirl is that so. many thousands of girls so nearly ‘the peer of Edith May in beauty, disposi- KR But the best part of this whole hunt for the pret- going to be erected against American goods exported tc foreign markets. That’s the little joker in a tar-' iff war. tion, character and ambition, were found. There is more rhyme than SS ee » . jelaims to. Yap. ~ ee Having brushed against the stars in a balloon, et \ Lieutenants Kloor and Hinton figure they cafi| According to reports from some colleges, stu- mingle with the vaudeville brand\ dents have been turning their sheepskins into - bootlegs, = os 4 SNEEZING IS EXPENSIVE - - A Michigan doctor called on an influenza patient.| The thirty Oklahomans poisoned by well water The patient sneezed: and’ the doctor contracted the|might go on the lecture circuit as “horrible ex- disease and died. He carried an accident insurance amples.” ” policy and his widow went to court to collect the . value of the policy on the ground that the doctor had| Jess Willard says he cares nothing for money contracted the disease through accident—namely,| and apparently he cares less than that for his _ the sneczing of the patient... A jury rendered a ver-| facial, contour. « ut de i dict in favor of the widow. ‘ = : 5 i Old legends credit the sneeze with being a direct} A hundred years from now the world may re- eause of death, but this is the first time it has been! oard it as unimportant that Baruch got ‘a medal given legal recognition as such. pane ‘i avid Sims didn’t: s Ii used to be; and still is,;in some countries, the E s custom to wish a man good luck when he sneezes. This custom grew out of an, ancient superstitipn that it was bad luck to snceze:.;:The basis of thes iper- stition was a pestilence in which snetzing’ was‘ a prominent symptom. — Hees While the ancients believed sneezing.was:bad luck} for the sneezer, modern science tells us the victim of the bad luek is’ more likely to be the person who stands too ¢lose to the snecze and inhales the: germéj thus issued. ° iMag If you must. sneeze, smother the sneeze with your handkerchief. A smothered sneeze is not as enjoy- reason to the Jap Pie : A man who married eight’ women ‘complains that Sing Sing. is;lonely ; golly, you'd think he'd be glad of the seclusion. Wie aa EDITORIAL REVIEW reproduced in this Sotuaea : mei or may ‘Comments expreee the opinion of The feb ited here in order, that our i issues ‘which ere of important fis Ne -prose of the day. THEY WERE AVENGED able to the sncezer @s a wide open one, but is much safer for everyone else in the vicinity It will be a relief to have the cabinet mystery solved before the time comes to plant this: year’s When George Ade and Ort-Wells went around the world together, a:steamship agent at Rangoon “done ’em dirt’ They had paid extra fare on a stateroom to hold it all the way from Calcutta to Singapore, but the British agent at Rangoon ; free government seeds. : pound. ee The tremendous increase of high schools must be; crowed another passenger into their cubby hole. Clear up to the middle of sailing they fussed with the agent, but he was snarling, sallowed wreck of human kind, and they were in a strange land; ’twasn’t any use. ; It was a desperately hot morning and the agent. was the only white man in sight. Just before the gangplank was pulled in Wells walked over to the agent and said: en “You have played us a contemptible trick, but Millionaires were few. It seemed casier to! we are going to get even with you.” . get along then than now. “Oh, you are, are you?” says he. “I should But if the increase of 450 per cent in the number jolly well like to know ‘how you intend to get of high schools in the United States since 1890 means | even,” anything, it means that we are better off than that | “Well,” replied Wells, solemnly. “we. are about Beneration: \to leave this place and you have to stay here.” All the ‘way cut of the harbor they could see interpreted as indicating a wider distribution of| him still standing there trying to figure it out.— prosperity and a consequent desire on the part of! Kansas City’ Star : parents to make the lives of their children richer! than theirs were. | aes In the last generation the high school was largely | WHAT SBP CUURCH NEES ‘the well-to-do family’s luxury. Today it is the pre- ae aS Be Mats an nich corte acts paratory school of the worker’s child and for his echi ig ee Si oae sa oan benefit the modern city high school has become-a vo-| hes jee Se i sre a status’ of public iii i i ianal traiiig center \ fluence and weight, and by conferentes and mani- ‘festoes can help to mould public opinion. In both In those days a work Id ff igh! ass ; : y man could not: efford high’ capacities it can contribute a stream of thought school for his children, ‘Today a workman cannot | SERGE: Day “afford not‘to send bis children to high school. {aud inspiration, the elect of which may: be slow, Then many’men ‘liked to say. that what was good! bu bean hardly help, in the long run, to be con- - enough for them, was good enough for their children, Siderable. It would be more considerable if the Today most mei say nothing is too’ good for their/ Churches were better equipped for their task. children, A . | The situation is possibly not the same in. Amer- F* The good old’ soft nineties gave us cheap butter |“? as in England. But in the latter country any ‘and eggs, but the harder 20th century has sharpened | observer must get impressed by- the disability our vision for self-iniprovement and social better-{ under which the church of England labors in cop- ment; has. popularized’ higher enducation and, |"& with questions which concern, or ought to “throngh edueation, has enlarged our needs. These Concern, the Christian consicence, through its needs cost us more and make us work harder than|™ere lack of any permanent machinery for grapp- > the simple needs of the easy ninetics, but they are | ling with them. What it needs is a, “thinking worth working for. These are the better times, department,” a staff of officers whose duty it is ; to collect and systematize information and’ to sup- The man whose jay, was not inflated by war|Ply the leaders of the church with the knowledge times is encouraged to believe the ditty: “When| needed if they are to speak with effect—The New “you're up you're wp and when you're down you're’ Republic.’ es) aces ai! THE BETTER TIMES When folks speak of ‘‘good old times,” -their minds run back,to the decade between 1890 and 1900. They were the lastyears of the old America, In those years no one was especially worried about’ so- cial and economic problems, Life ran in a fairly smooth groove. Eggs sold for about 12 cents a dozen and butter for a quarter a It is ai same -BYGOSH! I CAN BUY A SQUARE MEAL NOW. ‘You say the world needs altering ‘And you know |just. what should be done? Tf | had time—but I “It’s up to me to put it ““Yve got a lot of wi _, You . And hang the; mone; ‘e ought to start a The way the Rus: .y-You do it bo, I do Ri EN on,-old timer, spout,. Geo ‘ist as Red that’s the way, y fia cannot cou! aes a lot of work Cyiterd You talk too much,/old 199-4, ADVEN doubt in the world that all this time you've been thinking that ‘Zippy Zebra and Mr. Ostrich’ and his wife, Zig>y’s good friends, (although they ‘quarrel- ed now and then as good friends do), were all alone out there in the Land- ‘That-Was-Farthest-Away-Of-All. J suppose it never occurred to you that the two great big things that: looked so much like:gray rocks righet near where Zippy was grazing, might have been shoes with a pair of feet inside them that{ belonged to a funny little; fairy with a cuflicue top-knot ahd 8 very scarce Mose. |’ And I’m certain as Sunday that you never guessed that. the four: green i things sticking out’ from befieath the bobab-bush were anything different | eee | POETS’ CORNER | || QUESTION MARKS Bent (By Victor Stone) . When the nicest: girl in all our town, i Gets married to some bum“ . | | Who spends his time. and income | On women and on rum And for all her girlish swectuess i \ he has only grief to show. | | There's sure a reason for it i ‘But it’s one that:I don’t know.! some dishonest shyster ~ i i Who beats his fellow men \ | And hasn't done an honest. deal { | Since only Heaven knows when! | When | When this man seems to prosper. \ _Apd his riches seem to grow. | There’s sure a reason for it if But it's one that I don't know.! When God sends litfle children To cheer us with their smile And only leaves ’em with us For. just a little while And the little lives. must vanish When they’re needed here below: There’s sure a reascn for it "But it's one that I {When a lad has first class parents! Who work. and. toil ‘and pray | To give him an.education . i And help him<on his way When he turns out to be a bum Withea backbone weak a3 dough There's sure a reason for it | But it’s one that I don’t mnoe Ah yes there are a pile of things H We see on every hand | That you and I and’ the wisest head! Can never understand ' | Until we come to Life's last road | With a step that’s weary and) slow : And we walk straight through To a world that’s right And then I guess we'll know. i | —Contributed. | _-Theoworld won't listen much to you iov. » But mutters, as it passes by, \ . Tve gota :lot of: work to, do!’ ‘ yright, 1921, by Newspaper Enterprise Association) ° TURES OF THE TWINS By Olive Barton Roberts don’t know. ey T'd help you do that little thing have none.. * I’m in a deal that’s just begun through. I can’t revolt today. old son, \ to do! say you have the proper dope ‘ “We need a revolution now— , Our duty is to take a rope kings, you vow? x bloody row s did, say you? knew. ‘ Pve ‘got a lot of work to do! how, your spiel,. as|you can be. , A} a really feel, .. : But‘don’t expect that I'll agree! {°Tve f things on my mind, you see ies '4ou bust the world in two, . os ee hoss, that's why Now, my dears, I haven't the. least; than a very good salad dinner for Zippy himself. But indeed you are wrong!” also, were magic_shoes and they, toy, had feet in them—lovely pink ones, which kept going up into legs, two of which belonged to a lovely person with golden curls and blue exes called Nancy,and_ the .other: two: of--whicn belonged to’a fine young chap ‘called Nick. And certain as Monday, they had heard every single word Zippy Zebra and Mr..and Mrs. Ostrich ~had’ saic. Once, when Mrs: Ostrich raised -her head aud said, “I believe we are hav- ing an earthquake!” ‘it was only Fi pety-Flap” holding his plump sides These, and shaking and laughing fit to kill.’ Nancy: ands Nick laughed too because, having the Language Charm the Mag- ical Mushroom had given them, they could understand ostrich-talk and ze- bra-language as easily as you could understand American. | But all at once Flippety-Flap sob- ered. “Say,” he whispered, “Do you s’pose by all his talking of shoes 'n’ boots, 'n’ things, that he means us?” (Copyright, 1921,.N. E.. A.) (To. Be Continued.) —_—_ | Remarkable Remarks | - The salvation of this country now rests with the women.—Alice Robert- gon, congresswoman,, (Oklahoma. * If peace hath her victories no less renowned than war, then she. should have her honors and rewards for the men’ who have made this Nation the. most’ ‘glorious of all in*art, invention, and ing, of Alabama. i eee With 4,000000 men out of work and Russians, here with, gold: to. buy, why should we not develop a, market?— Senator Reed, Missouri. In the‘ present. state of the indus- trial machine, itis a time for oll and not for monkey: wrenches.—Jas, J. Davis, secretary of labor. * ¥ do not know of any way-on earth that we can legisiate to keep a rascal from being a rascal, but we can pun- ish him when caught.—Representative Sumners of Texas. se @ The American dye industry {s now in the grip of two huge coucerns of which the Du Pont is one—Senator King of Utah. Pies: It is our intention to dry up the flow ‘of liquor everywhere, / Some spots are still wet.—Wayne B. Wheeler, gen- eral counsel, Antt-Saloon ‘League, To be a good sport is a most neces- sary qualification for political life— Mrs. ‘W. F. Van Ness, New Jersey assembly woman, Like charity, honor begins at home; but it does not end there.—Senator. Williams, of Misstsstppi. There {s-no’ reason for. fearing ‘that. the dispute between the United States and Japan over the island of Yap will ) HEY sur MINE IN, THE HOLDER 1 ovess 1 BECAUSE THCY LOOK o much ALIKE — > \ Wl pRinc MY Al UMBRELLA BACK HERE & oom A, € GNOVGA — “THER \tT WAS discovery.—leprégentative Bow!-j m, SATURDAY, MAY 14, be settled otherwise’than by:peaceful means.—Rene Viviani, fo1 ‘French premier: ; “8 : Ca A ee IFA. CHILD is: not interested in something before he is 17, he’s done for.—Thomas A. Edison. ° eve IF YOU people would let us do our own censoring, we woutd get along much better—Clara Kimball Young, motion picture star. ha * ° e AMERICA came into the war late, but she ‘came; she’s coming late into peace, but she'll come.—Bainbridge Colby, éx-secretary of state. * ee ’ IP IS SAID that in marriage there must be one parent who rules. That’s good enough for Turks, but not for © Anglo-Saxons.—Lady Astor. = . * e ~IT IS NOW a determined matter that the Passion play will be given in 1922.—Anton Lang, player of the Christ role at Oberammergau. 8 8 SEVENTY per cent of railway’ freight traffic is tied up because of stagnant enonomic conditions.—Rob-" ert W. Wooley, former member of ‘in- terstate Comerce Commission. 'NATION LEAGUE ‘ISOPPOSED BY POLISH WOMAN Vilna, May | 14.— (By Associcfed .| Press).—The Polish women of Vilna have taken up cudgels. against the League of Nations... They: shouldere arms last summer and fought Bolshe- vik soldiers in defense of the city and they assert they will fight again if the League should attempt to send an ia- ternational army to police the disputed territory in event of 4 plebiscite. Vilna, at present, is occupied by* General Lucian Zelizowski, and some 20,000 Polish soldiers, while represent- atives of Poland and Lithuania, with the Leagueof Nations as mediator, |have been conferring with the view to determine the-fate of the Vilna dis- trict, which is called Central Lithunia ‘by General Zeligowski and his ad- herents. ; The League's Military Commission of Control, which ‘since last fall has been endeavoring to settle the contro- | Versy. between Poland’ and Lithuania, {until recently made its headquarters tn | Vilna. The Control Commission has {Never been popular in Vilna. By a re- cent decision which denied women the right of franchise, should a plebiscite be held, the Commission came into | greater disfavor than ever, especially among the women. ; The Commission. members contend that the hirth records of Central Lith- ubgia are.so incomplete that the vot- ing:of.women would only complicate | At, was ‘in. consequence of this de- ‘cision, and to manifest their disapprov- jal, that a ‘crowd of women attacked the Commission's chairman, Colonel {Chardigny, and spattered his French janiform' with eggs, some of 4vhich were not exactly fresh. A. few: days after this incident, the Commission re- , thoved its headquarters from Vilna to Kovno, which is the seat of govorn- ment of the republic of Lithuania. | Bight of the women were arrested {by the local police authorities, pat no date has been set for the trial. {, A-petition. signed by- thousands of Vilna- women has been sent to the Leagué of Nations asking for the re- moval of Colonel Chardigny as head of the “Military Commission of Control. |. The Lithuanians contend for the | Vilna district on the grounds that Vil- na was the capital of the ancient state jof Lithuania. They claim it also un- ‘der terms of a treaty of peace with the Soviets signed in Moscow last sum- m er. |. The Vilna Poles contend that the ‘majority of the population of the Vilna district is Polish, and that as less than three per cent of the population of about 1.500000 are Lithuanians, the state of Lithuania has no just claim to the land under. dispute. Vilna’s streets are daily filled with Zeligowski soldiers, all of whom wear the Polish uniform., Many of the of- ficers haye adopted the foe Central Lithuania insignia which is worn on the collar together with tho Polish ‘white eagle.’ The Polishycolors are to be seen everywhere in th@ busi- ness section of Vilna on holidays and {in most of the stores and restaurants there ar epictures of Joseph Pilsudski, Poland's chief of state. KILLED AS SPY. Belfast, May .14.—Kitty McCarron, ! killed by masked men, who attached a card to her body inscribed “spies and | informers beware, tried, convicted and {executed by the Irish Republican ‘army” was the sole support of her | aged parents and a mentally defec- itive brother. The police say they | know of no reason for killing her. ' COLLEGE MEN IN FARGO P. 0. No less thay 10 graduates of Dakota Business College, Fargo, N. D., are employed in the Fargo Post Office. The latest is Henry Nicholson, former soldier, who en- tered school on leaving the army. Firms employing D. B. C. grad- uates “want more” when new help is nceded. Standard Oil Co., of Fargo, has engaged over 100. D. B. C. graduates arc at work in every Fargo bank and about 700 others. “Follow the Succc$Sful”? at D. B. C. Summer School. Graduate in busy winter season. Write F. L. Watkins, Pres.,. 806 Front St., Fargo, N. D.” z !

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