The Bismarck Tribune Newspaper, April 20, 1921, Page 4

* tntered at the Postoffice, Bismarck, . D., as Second) : .stethescope is placed over the heart. Presto! Out . over the telephone wires go the vibrations from the valves of the heart. These vibrations are re- peted by a phonograph at the other end of the line, | the sound being magnified thousands of times so that it’s more like the chugging. of a steam ens! PAGE Form ~' of thrift Class Matter. GEORGE D..MANN - es : poate 3l Bi subi dainty Foreign Representatives | G. LOGAN PAYNE COMPANY ' CHICAGO DETROIT Marquette Bldg. , Kresge Bldg. PAYNE, BURNS AND SMITH i NEW YORK - - - . ‘THE BISMARCK TRIBUNE WEDNESDAY, APRIL 20, 1921 THE BISMARCK TRIBUN E! the futuie citizens’ 6t our country. The teaching oa and the practice of school savings bank- ing incorporated in our educational system, will Editor 0 far toward developing a strong thinking and 'efficient citizenship.” | J. E. Swearingen, state superintendent of edu- | cation in South Carolina, says: “Any movement that gives children a better: Fifth Ave. Bldg.’ understanding of existing business conditions and ‘The Associated Press is exclusively entitled to the use| Practices in their local home communities has my for publication of all news credited to it or not otherwise | support.” etediled in this paper and also the local news published | erein, All rights of publication of special dispatches herein are! also reserved. MEMBER AUDIT BUREAU OF CIRCULATION SUBSCRIPTION RATES PAYABLE IN ADVANCE Oaily by carrier, per year ....... beeccees Daily by mail, per year (in Bismarck) . -ONE-CENT INCOME TAX | _ You read about numerous people sending Uncle! Sam one cent as first quarterly payment on their’ income taxes. One stenographer mailed a money | ***7'29| order for a quarter, and with it a basket of stamps Daily by mail, per year (in state outside Bismarck... 5.00/ she’d paid for on perfume, silk stockings, theater Daily by mail. outside of North Dakota .........+. + 6.0 tickets and THE STATE'S OLDEST NEWSPAPER (Established 1873) LATEST VICTIM OF DIVORCE Another innocent victim of the divorce evil has appeared in the limelight. It is Fido. Fido finds himself a bone of contention between books. master and mistress as they near the parting of fresh their the like. These stamps represented | taxes already paid and, if you kept a receipt, could _be deducted from incemé on which tax was paid, jon the principle of not paying taxes on taxes. The income tax has been a blessing, if for no ‘other reason than that it has taught people to keep William H. Edwards, collector of internal rev- enue for Manhattan, puts it this way: . teresting to hear people discussing, trving to re-! “It’s in- as to the amount of luxury nemmortes 5; oe (taxes Lhey paid—tor instance, the tax on theater es Evostein, Chicago attorney, says the) tickets, In one corner of the corridors I came custody ote pedigreed dog has been a difficult) across a man and woman debating how much factor in many of his divorce cases recently, luxury tax they paid on different thing in fur- sometimes ending in the agreement that each’ nishing their home.” shall have the dog for six months of the year. | All of which causes us to wonder what we are! coming to anyway. When a man and woman who: have taken the marriage vows come to prefer the) society of a dog to that of each other, it would seem that the reflection were rather in favor of: the dog. | There is, however, one consoling feature of the! situation. E While the controversy is gonig on, Fido remains blissfully ignorant of the impend-! ing tragedy, unlike innocent children whose hearts! are often torn by rival affections for their un-' happy parents. thrift. AN AID TO LOVERS | A device that will make the human heart-beat | audible hundreds of miles away was demonstrat-| ed the other day at the army signal corps labora- tory in Washington. It’s a simple contraption, and can be used over telephone wires for any distance. An electrical j Pecple, like corporations, are developing a gen-| ius for keeping track of items they can deduct in paying income tax. | Here is a rare opportunity to learn scientifi | Every individual, every family, should go on aj budget basis. penditures, at the end of a few months you can run your eyes over the list and the items that can be pared down will be so obvious that they fairly slap you in the face. Then, knowing what to cut, you can install a | budget—appropriate so much out of every pay | envelope for food, so much for clothing, so much |for amusement and the like—and make it a point to bank or invest the balance. If you keep track of all your ex- English news must be good reading to the Irish. Last year, dandelions wére dug for wine—this |yean, for food. ging. | ‘ By using this device, a physician in New York might make a stethoscopic study of the heart ac- tion of a patient in San Francisco. And, too, brought to its highest utility, might not the lover at work in his office convey to his; laws”; but the source of this threat still remains , Sweetheart in a far-off summer resort his undy-|& mystery. ing love? } If'the pitty-pat of the heart is proof of love and devotion, here’s the ideal long-distance method of rified by the thought of would be oppressive.) conveying the message. Still, a lover might make the error of holding: hurt the cause they are asserted to represent by the stethoscope over his watch. In the interest of harmony, science had better keep out of the love! field. ~ i Allies demand that Germany deposit 1,000,000,-' and composed. 000 marks in our Federal Reserve Banks. Gogd! idea. Maybe they can be persuaded to leave it} would stop all amusements whatever has been “there, as first payment on what they owe. SAVINGS BANKS IN SCHOOLS The value of school savings banking as (1) a practical means for developing saving as a habit,' advertised by certain newspapers as having an- Yor (2) teach commissioners of education to the Amercian this. But the W. C. T. U. flatly denies it; says Bankers’ Association, Payson Smith, commissioner of education of| that it believes in protecting the workingmen’s Masschusetts, says: “I am heartily in favor of a system of school, opposes tobacco, but is not urging any new legis- savings banking as a project for fixing in the lation on either subject. student the habit of saving and-for teaching the workings of our economic system. The practice been and will be purely 2ducational and directed | of saving is more effective in fixing the habit of, at the youth of the nation. The only campaign] thrift than the fo1mal teaching of the subject We are making is to enlarge cur membership to without the practice.” Public schools of Missouri, says: “School savings banking gives to the child who! There is nothing wrong or threatening in this;, takes advantage of this movement an idea of our it is all very praiseworthy, on the contrary. Ap- economic system and the value of saving, and parently it isn’t the W. the bank that has taken up this problem is em-' clamp us dewn tight with ‘lue laws. Phasizing to all its customers at least that the: function of the bank is not only receiving and Week for all. They may not properly prescribe paying out money, but it sustains a relation to\ how that day of rest shail be used, except as im- industry, commerce and community development’ Proper use of it might impair the peace of the! that cannot be sustained by any other institu-| Community, To get people to use their rest day tion.” Thomas E. Johnson, state superintendent of and persuasion, not of law; and apparently most public instruction in Michigan, says: ae “I believe that of all the methods that have agree in that perfectly. been devised to train the children of the public schools in thrift the school savings one best adapted to the purpose.” Mary C. C. Bradford, state superintendent of| well to refrain from excitement and the expendi-' public instruction in Colorado, writes: j “I very heartily endorse school savings bank-|# concrete threat of them, from a visible source, ing, as a means of developing business ability in'that can be effectively opposed—Duluth ‘Herald, EDITORIAL REVIEW Comments reproduced in this column may or may not express the opinion of The Tribune. ey are presented here in order that our readers ve both sides of important issues which are being dis- || cussed in the press of the day. THE MYSTERY OF THE “BLUE LAWS.” A considerable number of people persist in get- ting excited about a threatened affliction of “blue| Being on guard against oppressive laws is! good; and such blue laws as many are being hor- | They would not only be vexatious, but they would’ |that overdoing which always produces reaction. But getting excited and alarmed unnecessarily isn’t good; and until the source of this threat is; definitely located it is just as well to remain calm The purpose of imposing Sunday laws that | ascribed to half a dozen organizations; and ap- ‘parently every one of the organizations accused |has denied the purpose charged against it. Recently the W. C. T. U. was somewhat broadly | that it has undertaken no new campaign at all; | Sunday and promoting a good use of it and that it! “Our campaign,” says this organization, “has a million. zenship.” CT. Laws may properly require one day of rest a ‘rightly and religiously is a matter of education of the people connected with reform movements America doesn’t want: blue laws. It is right to plan is the, °ppose them if they propose that law shall at.) tempt things law should not do. But it is just as! |ture of money in fighting blue laws until there is! | | i | ing at the tw bolo-bugh., Y ‘| Moon-Man?” cq fr Mrs. Monkey in sprprise. | answered Flippety-Flap, my friends.” sure as anything!” thoir fists in quickly through the holes and grabbed a handful apiece. A great, big, large, round handful—all they-could hold. ‘But when they tried to pull their hands out all doubled up, ‘'n all, they wouldn't come! j darning. one’ ¢ the fundamentals of the Ameri; nounced a crusade to get Sunday blue Jaws. pass-| 14 | Hercules at the rate of 600,000 miles a; adi | and the women are out to do the clea ing,”. rs. D fr their own and their husband’s"—Lady | ; Armstrong, Si re are’ lavi: ate ‘ = | : Also we are’ laying special empHasis; pye agitation for blue laws is un-| Samuel A. Baker, state superintendent of the on law enforc>ment, better morals and better citi-| American.’—The Rey. Harry B. Olsen \ | Milwaukee clergyman, | | pales! legs and n a shdért time I expect to jsee a . U. that is going to, Frank Connes, | Armenia. When crimi ito settle dow: /ler, Chicago criminologist. | throw the jazz records in the ash can {and begi | tic engineer, Chicago, > the eyes and imparts to them 4 ing lustre.”—Madame Louise, beauty expert. tries to vamp you, slap her. f if James W. Tarbell, Ohio judge, sees doubt, uncertainty, hesitation, ‘discontent, ‘misunderstanding, and’ in rom behind the round mirror, fok lowed by the tyins, nuts with the holes in the ends. Mr. ¢ +I Remarkable Remarks |) Channing H. Cox, Massachusetis: ————$ See rage Alliance, aay fy > ae) serie —= ADVENTURES OF THE TWINS By Olive Barton Roberts” ‘What shall we do?” they asked the fairyman. . Monkey stood look- cocoanuts under the} k Mr. and “Leggo, yourself!” cried Mrs. Mon ey. yi i But neither of them could ®¥ would or did. let go. & “What shall we do?” they begged the fairyman. Wlippety-Flap smiled. Things were going exactly as he had planned and he was quick to answer. “Hold on tight. If you let go, the mce will likely get away. I’ve got a friend in a_cireus that—” “What!” cried both monkeys in amazement, “A circus! We don't want to go back to’the circus.” “Let me finish,” said Flippety-Flap calmly. “A friend who has a big hammer and he can get your hands out in a jiffy so you can get the rice.” Mr. and Mrs. Monkey were thought- ful. “If we go can we have’ goldfish for lunch?” asked ‘Mr. Monkey fin- ally, “And a mirror?” Mrs. Monkey asked quickly. “Ce “Where's thd nico white rice, Mr. led Mr. Monkey. ‘Flippety-Flapfnow stepped into view “Are you tha Mooni(Man?” asked “You may call me what you .wisli,” “These are “But where age the rice?” Flippety+#lap}pointed to the cocoa- nd Mrs. Monkey each grabbed “Great gold- “It's rice nut and sniffed. chortled Mr. Monkey. “Then he and Mrs, Monkey stuck nly,’ ‘nodded lippety4Flap. y Queen will see to that.” “All right,” agreed the monkeys. “Leggo!” cried Mr. Monkey. “Lets hurry! a ON ' ae |some places, despair. overnor lately no inspiration in) “It is possible that the excess profits Socks or laundering! tax can be repealed without resort to Miss Gertrude Van; 4ny new extensive taxes to take its “There’ shington real estate brok- can economic system and for (3) demonstrating ed and to bring about legislation prohibiting the! er. N the function of banks in the advancement of lo- use of tobacco. The W. C. T..U. being no friend) cal interests, is indicated in letters from state of tobacco and Sunday frivolity, many believed ¢o. i is traveling straight towards ne's shirt y en, V | EVERETT TRUE t WHERE “phis world is its way to death,’ Jo OWN his world isjon its way to ee eee 3 trea] Some SOOT JDID I ON YOUR EAR. [|Get (TE , and while the distance is immense | s not infinite.”—Rev. George T. Gul-| n, Detroit. i ce | “Politics needs a general cleanup! Carrie Chapman Catt, dent International Woman's Sut- | “Many women now have two votes— | British suffragist. j “The Bolsheviks are on their last prosperous Russ‘a."—Lieut. Red Cross worker in: oung man’s game. ome 30, they begin -Dr, Herman M. Ad-, “Crime i “World unrest will end when we; to play ‘Home, Sweet Dr. Frank ©. Morton, acous- ‘ome.’ “Weeping in moderation strengthens “When any woman you do not know and ates necessary, blacken her ey “Both in Europe and at home one [ DOWN tt It Gol! GET DOWN To MY | place.”—Senator Boies Penrose, chair- man, Senate fiinance committee. “Manufacturing home brew is a fad, an adventure, and will die ‘from Its own regsults.”—Prohibition §Commis- sioner Kramer. cesar JUST JOKING | —+ Y vises: CLEAN U | YOUR HAT’SYOUR HUT “Hat’’ comes from the same Anglo-Saxon root.as hut or house. Your hat is your castle. Be sure you live in one expressive of your per- sonality—in , other words, be sure it’s a Gordon. There's a Gordon model for i every type—a color for each individual taste; get the hat | that becomes you. young man, “as long ag there's a crank in the house.”—Detroit Times. We know a man 80 thrifty that he takes off his glasse when he's not looking at anything—Burlington (Vt.) News, i Fruit, Her lips were red and sweetly curved, As I kissed them they seemed like cherries; She had me pinched; I was easy fruit, And ate judge soaked me fifty ber- ries. —Cartoons Magazine. A cafe ad in a movie publication ad- “If your wife can’t cook, dont | divorce her. Eat here and save her |for a pet,”—Chicago Tribune. Cited For Valor. The swain and his swainess had just encountered a bulldog who looked as if he might shake a mean lower Jaw. “Why, Percy,” she exclaimed as he started a strategic retreat, “you al- | Ways swore you would face death for ime.” | “f would .” he flung back over his shoulder, “but that darned dog ain't | i i 5 + ‘ i Flattery is the best cure for a stiff: neck. It will turn almost any head— Cartoons Magazine. A Good Kind. “Er—what brand is this?” asked the man, looking at the gift bottle. “Contraband,” No, casual redder, the Port bill is not one of the new dry laws.—New York Evening Past. A Bit Confused. He—I say, old dear, was it you kissed in the conservatory last night? She—Let me see—about what. time was it?—Tit-Bits (London). The hotel jazz orchestra informs us who put the din in dinner,—Washing- ton Post. Another Advantage. “They say a woman can’t keep 4 secret.” “That's why I want a women in poll- tics, I believe in pitiless publicity."— Detroit Free Press, The old-time physician resorted to bleeding on the slightest provocation, but now it’ done by the tax assessor.— Detroit Free Press. One of the most discouraging tasks in the world must be praying for Congress. One chaplain prayed for congressmen 25 years and look at them now! --Seattle 'Post-Intelligen cer, When a young man tells a girl a lot yarns, she isn’t to be blamed for give ing him the mitten—Detroit Free Press. Back-Fired, When the clock struck 12 father came to the head of the stairs and in a rather loud voice said: “Young man, isn’t your self-starter out of order tonight?” “It doesn’t matter,” retorted th BY CONDO No, ‘cou NO, Lower] NO, NO, NO I've Gort To OFFICE SOME Time THIS MORNe Ty ING WY | Los Angeles Record. | cer | | dead,”"—American Legion Weekly. The man with a good-looking wife and three grown daughters realizes ‘about this time of year what it means j to be ground under the fron heel of millinerism.—Kansas City Star. i i The Knoe Craze. Tempus fugit. Where a few years ago ankles were discussed either with |a blush of modesty or an air of mid- night bravado, now it is knees. This, apparently, is the result of higher edu- cation,—Detroit News. | Of course, it’s too late in the day to mention it. But wouldn’t this have | made a pip of an ad for distilleries: Your Nose Glows.—Seattle Star. The Gasoline Cure. ‘ Sparke—My Doctor advised me to take up motoring for my health. Said I needed exercise, . Plugge—Pshaw! |no_ exercise. Sparke—No, but getting the money jt pay for it is.—Motor Life. | Some girls, as you may have noticed; have the cheek to take Paint Up Week | literally—Douglas (Ariz:) Daily In- | ternational, Brevity Is the Sound of Wit. Don’t eat stale cucumbers; they are | like to w up. Refrain from drinking too much un- fermented apple juice. It will prob- ably cause a pain in cider you.— Judge. Running a car is Self-control is the quality that keeps you from uncorking the brew on the second day inst¢ad of the sev- enth,—Washington Herald. Nor a Match, Either. = A pompous manufacturer of ma- chinery wag showing a stranger over his factory. “Fine piece of work, isn't it?” he said, indicating one machine. “Yes,” said the visitor, “but you cannot hold a candle to the goods we are turning out. / “Indeed! And what is your line?’ “Gunpowder.”—Boston Post, The mikado has sent a “gesture of friendship” to the United States. And as we recall, Jess Willard and Jack Dempsey shook hands at Toledo one Fourth of July.—Cleveland Press. A Colorado man will plug yeast cakes in watermellons and produc€ hooch. At last we know why they call those fruit pictures “still” life—San Diego (Cal.) Sun. THANKFUL HE WAS NOT A WOMAN. The late Lawson Tait, of England, the great woman’s doctor, said he nev- er went to bed at night without thank- ing heaven he was not born a woman. No doctor ever knew better than he what women have to suffer at some times of their lives: It was an Amer- ican woman, long since passed to her reward, who introduced a combination of roots and herbs called Lydia E. Pinkham's Vegetable Compound, that has proved wonderfully successful in mitigating suffering and relieving dis- eases of women. It has brought re- lief to thousands of women who suf- fered from female ills. Adv. = BAD BREATH Dr. Edwards’ Olive Tablets Get at the Cause and Remove It Dr. Edwards’ Olive Tablets, the substitute for calomel, act gently on the bowels and positively do the work. People afflicted with bad breath find quick relief through, taking them. Dr. Edwards’ Olive Tablets are vegetable compound mixed with olive oil, They act gently but firmly on the bowels and liver, stimulating them to natural action, clearing the blood, and purifying the entire system. They do that which calomel does, without any of the bad after effects. Take one or two every night for a week and note the Pleasing effect, 15c and 30c a box i