The Bismarck Tribune Newspaper, June 12, 1920, Page 4

PAGE FOUR “THE BISMARCK ‘TRIBUNE Entered at the Postoffice, Bismarck, N. D., as Second Class Matter. GEORGE D. MANN - : 2 OGAN PATNE COMPANY G. LOGAN peTROIT BK S$ AND surg? cee 'YNE, BURN: NEW YORE NE BURNS AND Stith Ave. Bldg. The Associated Press is exclusively entitled to the use for poblicatien of all news credited to it or not otherwise ce ited in this paper and also the local news published rein. i All rights of publication of special dispatches herein are also reserved. recovered ffom thé colic, Tom tellS’of' his experi- ences and laughs. If he tells it well, his friends laugh, too. . Editor and laughs. When the baby weighs a tenth of a ton, and has children and grandchildren, the story takes on new life, new point. : 1 eee “You wouldn’t believe that I carried your moth- er five hours at a stretch, would you now?” He tells how she cried and he imitates her. And-he laughs. For the thousandth time he laughs. Best investment in laughter he ever made was MEMBER AUDIT BUREAU OF CIRCULATION I y toting that baby till 3 a. m. rags: ee pes eine IN rrr Why didn’t he laugh at the time of the toting? Daily by mail, per year (in Bismarck). . +++» 720) Why can’t we see the humor in the present in- Daily be mail, Per year ( inj state outside Bismarck) a stead of waiting for the future to make us laugh? Yes, the little ills of life are humorous, event- ually. Why not now? THE STATE’S OLDEST NEWSPAPER (Established 1873) > A DISCOVERY England has found out that a palace is good for something. i _| If government would leave paper money blank The king of England has decided to split up his] on one side, publishers might use it for newsprint. palaces and rent out furnished suites to members of the court to ease the housing problem. The best argument in favor of organized labor It is true that the step is at present confined | is the fact that postal’employes are not organized. only to members of the royal household, who have ane ae eS been having great difficulty getting a town house in London, and have been having equal’ trouble in getting hotel accommodations. But maybe George will not stop with the inner circle. Who knows but that some day, a London plumber or docker, or tram-car man, may be liv- ing next to his majesty in Buckingham palace! THE HIGH FLYING MR. TOWNLEY Maybe George thinks it’s better to share up his} A news dispatch a few days ago told how Mr. palaces at $25 a suite than to run any risks of Townley having damaged his $10,000 airplane, having the whole run of palaces confiscated. Di-/ had immediately telegraphed for another, and viding up palace rooms while the dividing is good,] now we are told that a third machine has been rather than having them requisitioned by the] ordered from the manufacturers and will be de- A man has more room in his pockets now that a corkscrew and a nickel are useless. EDITORIAL REVIEW Comments reproduced in this column may or may not express the opinions of The Tribune, aver are Bren sented here in order vhat our readers may have both sides of tmportant issues which are being discussed im the press of the day. A year, 10-years, 40 years, he tells the story’ BISMARCK DAILY TRIBUNE SATURDAY, JUNE 12, 1920 His Whole Intétest WILL ROGERS SAYS: attains. “commissioner of housing” as they did in Russia, is certainly better business for the king, and per- haps for all concerned. . Carranza is not without his revenge. The revo- lutionists inherited Villa. THE SECRET IS OUT Haven’t you often wondered why it is that the “college type” young man wears clothing of the hue and cut which has come to be as much a part of the college life as the football team, the remit- tance from home and.the degree? Sure you have. And never learned the answer. Here it is: “Our type of college man, who has a knack of wearing his hat and clothes in an entirely original manner,” remarks Vanity Fair, “is justified by the decorative effect he attains.” You who have-found. fault with the college type for garbing himself as he does, cease your knock- ing. He is justified by the decorative effect he And it certainly is the acme of: decora- tive effect. Ask father the day after his son re- turns from college. If that is what the college type is trying to achieve—decorative effect—the attainment is all that could be hoped for. Too much probably, viewed through father’s eyes, but still, it shows what'a man can do if he has a knack of wearing hat and clothes in a manner different from all other humans. Bergdoll and Newberry at large and Debs in jail. Down with the Reds! THE FOOLISH PEASANT Once upon @ time there was a peasant who said it was too cold to go out'in the woods to chop logs for the fire. So he conceived the idea of chopping up the furniture for that purpose. In a short time he had disposed thus of the chairs and tables —and, then, being cold once more, he took out the window frames and burned them; and after the window frames, the doors. These being burned, he was colder than ever, of course. Thereupon he started to tear down the house and burn it piece by piece until, at the end, he had neither house nor heat. The folly of this peasant is not unlike that of the person who, for frivolous reason, sells his Lib- erty bonds which, by painstaking thrift and sac- rifice, he acquired during the war to be his pro- tection for the rainy day. He is disposing of a sheltering roof and knock- ing out the door that: might serve later to help keep out the ‘wolf. A Liberty bond is capital. No prudent man gr firm ever dissipates cdpital, for it is the founda- tion on which a business is based. A firm that begins dipping into capital for running expenses . is ready for bankruptcy and ruin. Don’t spend your Liberty bond. To do so is like burning down the house to keep warm. And you can just about judge a generation by its bedtime. WHEN IS HUMOR? Nearly all humor is founded upon some sort of unpleasantness for somebody. It follows that nearly all our own little ills are humorous. The only question is, “When are they humor- ous?” Tom Tomlinson walks the floor with the baby until 3 a. m. The next night he does the same. And the next? And the next? Is it funny? “Not on your life!” says Tom. But wait. A few weeks latex, shen baby: has livered as soon as it can be constructed. This makes $30,000 which the high flying president of the Nonpartisan league has spent on planes during the last few weeks. At this rate he will probably purchase several more before the campaign ends in November. Let us hope that the farmers in the western part of North Dakota who have been nearly ruined by the drouth of the last year are edified by the spectacle of Mr. Townley buying airplanes in wholesale lots with their hard earned dollars. Perhaps, however, we do the able head of the league an injustice, and he is. paying for his toys with post dated checks.—Grand Forks Herald. | ; CRUM JOINS TOWNLEY | News dispatches from North Dakota during the week inform the people of Montana that Judge Charles L.. Crum, impeached from the bench in Montana, is the Townley candidate for the legis- lature in Oliver county, North Dakota. This does not surprise The Independent. Every seditionist, every renegade, every traitor to his country; every red flag agitator who can see nothing good whatever in American institu- tions but only evil, is eagerly sought, out by the socialistic leaders of the Nonpartisan league and elevated, if possible, to positions of honor and profit. That Judge Charles L. Crum, impeached on charges ‘amounting to sedition, should be gath- ered in by Townley is in keeping with the Town- ley policy always. Such disloyal rascals as Judge Crum, with bitter hatred for the American gov- ernment intensified by his impeachment in Mon- tana, make first-class agitators. They speak from the heart. They hate the American gov- ernment and its laws because its laws made no exception of them when they went contrary to them. Therefore they want to break down all laws and the bonds of civilized society. Judge Crum would laugh if. he could only view America crushed before he passes on. And he will make a valuable man for A. C. Townley and Walter Thomas Mills.—Helena Independent. O’HARE PARDON President Wilson has given another,example of that vaccillating policy which has made the gov- ernment at Washington the laughing stock of the world for the last seven years. He has even done worse. On the day dedicated to those brave men who died that our country might live, the president of the United States grossly insulted their memory, as well as slapping the face of the living ex-service men and every American moth- er. On Memorial day, while the entire world united and clasped hands across the sea, its mem- ory of the honored dead, the news came to. us with a sickening shock that Attorney General Palmer and President Wilson had joined hands with the Reds by pardoning Kate Richards O’Hare, that miserable piece of iniquitous human- ity, who-in a speech at Bowman, N. Dak., brand- ed the mothers of American soldiers as “brood sows,” the woman who as assistant publisher of the “Social Revolution” spread anarchistic prop- aganda until the publication was barred from the mails, and who is proud to relate that she has spent her lifetime spreading such damnable doc- trines. . We did not expect that we would live to see the day when a president of the United States would so far forget the sacred principles of his high of- fice as to cater to a mob of semi-anarchists but with Wilson, the modern Don Quixote, at the helm it is impossible to forecast into what breakers and reefs the ship of state is steering.—State Line News, Newark, 8. D. id aan wR) a ae a ee Soe a EOE NEE Mees, ON So oN “Chicago’s only one of the two (Famous Oklahoma Cowboy Wit and Goldwyn Motion’ Picture Star.) I am being paid to write something funny about this Republican conven-; tion. That’s funny. All a fellow has to do something funny on a _ Republican convention is just write what hap- pened. Chauncey Depew and I were about the last to decide to write. Chauncey has the advantage of me, He knows his jokes are good ‘cause he has told them for years, The convention is starting out with a big setback. A carload of cham- pagne from California billed for Chi- cago for medicinal purposes was held up. In the first place the convention is to be held in Chicago. Chicago 1s located just north of the _ United States. I am well acquainted witli the American consul there. Chicago holds the record for murd- cities big enough to hold all of G. 0. P. candidates” ers and robberies conventions, The'Republicans had to hold their. and Republican Chicago this year as no other city to write! W288 big enough to hold all their can- didates. ‘ Mexico dont know how to get rid of Villa, Loan him to us for a Vice- President. That would get both na- tons rid of him. If the Republican split as they did eight years ago every body better start preparing to be kept out of an- other war. They dont know whether to seat the colored delegates or not. If they do it will be far back near the door. To show you true democracy will rule the convention, the first thins they did was to throw out two delo- gates the people had ‘elected. The Demoerats-/are “investigating the Republican.slush funds and ii they find where it’s coming from they want theirs. ‘AT THE MOVIES | See BISMARCK THEATRE The all-star Fox production “The She Tiger” will ‘be shown for the last time at the Bismarck Theatre’ to- day. The power of a Merican’s sen- orita’s jealousy. of. an American girl in love with an American army offi- cer is the underlying theme in this stirring drama of the Mexican border which is from the famous novel of IN. P. ‘Niessen, “The Love Theit.” Action—and more action—of the rapid fire sort permeates the devel- opment of the plot. There’s not a dull moment in the entire show, which is calculated to stir the most Phlegmatic spectator to enthusiasm. ELTINGE THEATRE Wallace Refd, the handsome screen star, says he. invented the “shimmie.” Here is his claim to fame: “I was hunting one autumn in the Yellowstone with a party of friends. I forged out alone on a deer track, located the animal, and wounded it. But I had to follow it so far before it dropped that it was dark and 1 lost my bearings and had to finish the night in the brush canyon. “When I awoke in the morning ex- actly half the deer was gone! » “I got to thinking and the more | thought, the more trembly I became. At precisely that moment I invented the “shimmie.” Around noon I shot the mountain lion.\ That renewed my train of thought and I gave an encore of the dance and perfected it. Suppose he had preferred me to the deer? Thank heaven for luck!” Mr. Reid is at present’ starring in “Hawthorne of the U. S. A.,” a Par- amount-Artcraft.. picture which witl be shown at the Eltinge Theatre tonight with Lila Lee, Theodore R»- berts, Tully Marshall Charles Ogle, and Edwin Stevens included in the cast. The picture was directed by James Cruze, USES TELEGRAPH TO GET STENO Well trained office assistants are not “picked up’ everywhere. When big firms nced capable help, they wire or “‘long distance’? Da- kota Business College, Fargo, N. D. Recently the DakotaConstruction & Engineering Co. of Valley City wired-for an efficient bookkeeper- steno. Miss R. Gregerson was sent. A phone message from the James River National Bank, James- town, resulted in placing A. P. Mc- Donell in their Edmunds branch. “Yollow the Succes$ful.’’ Enter summer school now; Write F. L. ‘Watkins, Pres., 806 Front St., _ Fargo, N. D. ce = TOO MANY GOPHER ENEMIES AT WORK | > - ° | Ashley, June 12.—County Auditor John Hildebrand has so many gopher tails that he doesnt know what to do with them. Because of the activity of enemies of the gophers, the auditor has an- nounced that he will pay two cents for each gopher killed in the county, ‘but that tails or other proof will not be received by. him before June 29 or after July 3. RESIGNS POST Fargo, N. ‘D., June 12—B. 'M. Flynn; athletic director at St. John's college at Collegeville. Minn. has accepted the post of athletic director for the Fargo council of the Knights of Col- umbus. The Fargo council is estab- lishing an athletic organization. convention either in New York or} GRAND OPERA TO ATTRACT MUSIC LOVERS TONIGHT Sonora Company, With High Recommendations, Also’ Will be Heard Monday Night Bismarck is particularly’ fortunate in having secured the Sonora Grand Opera company for a brief season of grand opera in this city. During their engagement at the Auditorium which commences tonight, they will present the following operas: “Rigoletto,” on Monday night, June 14, “Il Trova- tore” with a complete change of prin- cipals. ‘From the excellent reports that precede them from other cities where they have played it would seem that this company is endowed with un- usually capable artists, who can not only ‘sing, but also act.:::From the Vancouver World.‘we* have the fol- lowing criticism: ~*~ “Beatrice Pizzorni and Alfredo Gra- ziani, io the double bill’ of ‘“Cavel- leria Rusticana” and “Pagliacci,” the second: offering, of the Sonora Italian Grand Opera company. at, the Avenue theatre, received an enthusiastic wei- cone from a large audience. The two famous operas of Mascagni and Leon- cavello were given a pleasing per- formance throughout rising to a high plane of excellence.” The review continues with similar praise. ss —— STATE AID MAY BE GIVEN PARK + Yas Minot, June 12—State aid’ may be given.in making improvements in Lincoln park, a pretty recreation spot here, by the state board of regents. This was discussed by the board in connection with a ‘proposal to build a reservoir near the state’ nor- mal school. Lincoln. park is located directly op- posite the state normal school. EVERETT TRUE PAL wp). WHEN You DUMP ASHES DON'T THROW THEM — GAY THEM Down!!! a Fi LG i) ~ By Condo BS IR SA Army ee sc I AE ab STR PE LR Kc A at EI ec teh AREAL IS VA SCENE eo SR NN EL Me ees, eae US So ‘8.0K OUT SOUSA,” HERE’S NEW. RIVAL ee HAROLD BACHMAN Harold ‘Bachman, director of tho Million Dollar band which is to play in Bismarck on June 17 has had a career which fits him admirable for the position he now holds as director of a big concert band. After graduat- ing from college where he special- ized in music for a period of, eight years, he played for several seasons on the road with different concert organizations, among which was the famous Bohumir Kryl -Connert- band of Chicago. §, Between seasons -he studied his chosen instrument, the cornet with H, A. Vandercook df Chicago, and Mr. Vandercook counts Director Bachman as one of his most successful pupils, using his name on all his advertise- ments for his cornet school. With this experienced (Mr. Bach- man was well: qualified to make a nane for himself as director of an afmy band in which capacity he serv- ed for about two years before tak- ing his own band on -the road. to enter into the commercial band busi- ness, Mr. Bachman says that his band this year will be much better than ever before. AMUSEMENT AND FUN PROMISED AT JAMESTOWN Jamestown, June 12—There’s going to be a lot of fun in Jamestown on June 24, 25 and 26. Stutsman county fair, L. A. Larson, president and Andrew Haas, secre- tary, announce that there is going to be everything that goes to make up a regular fair. There will be horse racing for fat purses, automobile and motorcycle races, a flying circus, a__ soldiers’ parale on Legion day, the 25th, carn- ival shows and free attractions, in- cluding two bands. “Got the blues.’ asks: an advertise- ment. “Make up your mind‘to go to the fair.” Delegations from towns are expect- ed to attend the gala days. WEATHER REPORT Yor 24 hours ending at noon June 12. Temperature at 7 a. Mm. .....-.56- 63 Highest yesterday. 82 Lowest yesterday . f Lowest last night ‘Precipitation Highest wind v Forecast ‘For ‘North Dakota: Generally fair tonight and Sunday; not much change in temperature. Lowest Temperatures Fargo . -6: Williston. Grand Fork: St. Paul .. (Winnipeg ‘Helena ... Chicago... Swift Current Kansas City .... ORRIS. Sa2Neeregs (Meteorologist. Experiments have been conducted at Vancouver, B.C., toward build- ing houses from marble dust and sawdust, at a cost of about 6 cents a foot When Run-Down ‘ Fonp pu Lac, Wis.-"Dr. Pierce’s Favorite Prescription is a very good medicine. When I was a girl going to school I got all run-down and weak due to hard studying. I was coming into womanhood and this medicine built me up in fine shape in just ashort space of time. I also took it about seven years ago dur- ing expectancy and it helped me wonderfully. I had practically no suffering and my baby was strong and healthy and has always been. The ‘Prescription’ has done won- ders for me. I think it the: only medicine for weak women.”—MRs, CaRL GUELL, JR., 290 9th Street. Good looks in woman do not depend upon age, but upon health, You never see a ‘good-looking woman who is weak, run-down. _ Dr. Pierce’s Favorite Prescrip- tion is the best women’s tonic there is, ‘It is 50 years old, and its age testifies to its goodness. These are the dates of the big | i SRE NES tn Noreen ~ Sea POS cogs onl fey