The Bismarck Tribune Newspaper, February 25, 1918, Page 6

FRIENDS STRICTLY RAILROADING TERMS, TOO! By Blosser FRECKLES AND HIS You BoYS WILL EITHER: WAVE To STOP MAKING SUCH NOISE inn SIDE AND PLAY- Do {You UNDERSTAND 2 OR GO OvT- GEE WHIZ~ WE AIN'T MAKIN" ANY \ WARNED You 80S, AND NOW I'M GOING To SWITCH You Fole MAKING SUCH A ieee Suite FRECKLES WERE PLAYIN’ TRAIN AN’ ME'S TH’ SQUIRREL FOOD MAYBE A GENT HE'D WORK FOR WOULDN'T WEAR ’EM. By Ahem Y'know wat (0 LiKe To BE 2 \D LAKE To * BE A VALET To Somesopy ! HATS WHAT \ tuoucnT ! WITH ALL You KNOW ABOUT CLOTHES — You |] WOULONT KNOW | | TH DIFF BETWEEN A BREAKFAST JACKET OR DINNER COAT IF YOUR MASTER ASKED YOU fo FETCH EITHER ONE! OW WOULDNT | %—1D LOOK FOR EGG MARKS ON TW’ BREAKFAST JACKET AN' GRAVY MARKS ON WW DINNER Cont ! TM. & SURVIVOR OF “WW WTANIC ANI LOST PAY WIFE AN’ KIDS IN TH’ JOHNSTOWN: FLOOD- COULD Y'GIVE ME. (CHESTNUT CHARLIE er By Blosser SAY! YOURE TH! GUN THAT INSULTED NY BRoTHER'' Air _ NEE] NES UE SAD HE iA -WAS WALVING BEHIND UP AND AIT Ti wit A RIPE TOMATO AUSWS astl HAAS Rumors Fly in Paris, But French Everything's Going to the Dogs, and the Russians Under li Geiman Drillmasters Are About to March Against | France, Which Has Left—If You Believe All You Hear in the Cafes ‘ By GEORGE RANDOLPH CHESTER AND LILLIAN CHESTER Paris, Feb. 25.—Lights and laughter in the busy little Cafe de Bc Brille; but not for them! The seven Americans at the ‘ days. The only comfort they have is —having met on the boat coming trust in exch other. friend, though not quite a firm one. Brown ordinarily is a hard-cheeked fellow with squinty eyes, but there is no trace of a squint in him now, The “+ eyes are buiging with excitement, as <.. —hé grabs fat Dooflab and little Ding- bat by the coat lapels, leans as far to the center of the table as possible, and whispers piecringly: “We fellows had better get right out of Paris.” There is one instantaneous thought : in the minds of all; and lanky Smith, is at the {nner end of the table; voices it hoarsely: “Eerything’s gone to the dogs!” Brown gulps, and tightens his grip on the coat lapels. “The French army has only. one cart- ridge left! Afi their. waiting for now is to decide who gets to shoot it; then they’re going to evacuate Paris, ard fet thé Ger- imans in; and goodnight!” Brrrrrr! :A, chill like an ague des- cends on the assemblage, but little Ditigbgt, who fs hopeful, not because hé isan optimist but because he hates (| to. die, moisténs his lips, and. asks: f ‘How do. you know?” High Authority. “Tm not. at liberty to state,” an- swers, Brown, looking around him fur- tively ard. lowering his voice stfil more.. “But I.may tell you this much: . the information came from a high authority. Thatsettles it. Who is there to dis- _ pute high authority? Something like a groan is in thé deep sighs of the eight, firm friends, and the silence is ‘broken by the harsh, hoarse voice of * Dootiab, saying “Leggo o’ my coat.” ' from his round. face, and full of many ; @ merry. quip and jest, is now pasty, nd can't, breathe. 3 4 e Judas Russians!” comes voice from near the end of table: While, with sil. the gold headed, big Jones to Jittle Dingbat with the steeped and saturated in gloom as they wait for their y | have been in Paris, the center now of all big things, for two whole | ' For: Dooflab, ‘a jolly disposed fellow,’ Rus-|tremblously. “1 have my steamer tickets for ing twat, and 1 hope; 1| that Will ‘be. sate Don’t Heed Them : Only One Cartiidge corner table, from freckled red- hair mustache, are soup; for 1 in each other; they are firm friends over—and they ean confide in, and “Say!? They are electrified by the sudden appearance of another | , for Brown crossed on the previous | boat. But they met him in London, and he came all the way from | there to Paris with them, he and his crowd, so he’s all right. I Russia is united!” explains White. “The been drilling foi) months under German officers! They have as inated all the allied rep resentatives in scow and Petro-| | Stad! They started yesterday on a} march to Verdun, a milion. strong!) | They’re murderinh everyon rho r fuses to take up. arms and join th ; By the time they reach the frontier there'll be four million of them; and—' { The waiter brings the soup to a! table which is cold and clammy, and} tensely silent. The eight sit like tues. They do not utter a syllable in the presence of this little may with! the down-drooping black mustaches, | He may be a spy! and their informa-| tion is secret ,confidential, valuable. ; | -“=—+ and good night!” finishes | White, as the waiter moves away. | “And you have this from a good au-| thority?” pipes up little Dingvat. His | upper lip seems to be shrinking away | | from the six hairs of tis little n | taché;, teaving them to stick straight out, alone and unsupported. “High,” affirms White in awe; “a— a man cénnectéd with the army!” | “By George!” Jones slams his fist | on the table so hard that the soup in| | the platés jumps into little peaks, and | Dingbat spills his wine ordinary ar} | all turn feverishly to the redthes? | | “Now I believe it! Boys, a man told | me something this morning, in stricc} confidence, which I couldn't swallow, | jin spite of the fact that the thing! {came almost directly from a high au-| thority; bit no wthat I know this/ Russian situation I see that he was} right! The Italians have secretly ced-| ed to the Germans all their territory down to and incloding Rome’ And the | canal is to be completed cutting across below Rome, which will leave | thé whole southern part of Italy an | island, under. the protectorate. of the} German ‘Empire, with the capital at japles” x aur ‘ Spirit God!” 1. 0 of Jones.. roices little Dingvat There is a general reflection of the rit of Jones on every excep that of little Ding’ Ww clings tea aciously to the fac. that he hates to aybe the British cau keep them out,’ ‘suggests. Prown. “They did, you know.” “The British?” Gray looks around at the boys meaningly, and they turn pitying eyes on Brown. ven’t you heard about the Brit: 2?” inquires Smith, shocked tha’ there should be such ignorance in Paris. “Tell him Gr i “Oh nothing,” says Gray, affecting an exereme nonchalance of manner -|He's a rough sort of citizen, is Gray. the kind who wears a soft collar and a fuzzy hat, and speaks hard anc s loud, and conveys a genera on with his shoulders of be dy to fight at any and all times ing r and. is always’ -dragging sick cats heme. ,“Scarcelyanything, ‘Brown! Only this; ‘all. that remained of the h army was wiped out at Cam- wvai! There’ otlicers you see in’ Londos and Paris, g to form themselves in- to\a regiment, and_go up there for’ the honor of the British nation, and all be ed off in one last forlorn-hope dash t Tuesday at 2:15 p. m.!” ave fellows, the Britishf* ob- Jones, with the solemnity of -and his ‘sentiment is reflected yn every face except Dingbat’s, who is too mugh shocked to have any ex- pression. f It’s Rough. “It's rough that we don’t get the truth at home,” Dooflab pours the e from the big tilting magnum h a firm hand, though his face is ill pasty. “However, we're in this thing, and we're in it to stay, and, ay thunder, we'll do something! We're overlooking ihe fact that our fine ‘usky United States soldiers are veady to go into action, and hungry for it! I’ve heard, on pretty high auth- ority, that we have something like ‘ive million here now! “Five what!” Agonized little Ding vat violently plucks out one of the six irs of mustache. “Is that what g your hope on! Now I'l vhat I found out, and from a LAR oY PRETTY GIRLS PLAY BILLIARDS FOR nothing lett of it but the} very high authority, though I wouldn't | repeat it except here among. friends, |whom I know and can trust.” His |eye wavers with merely a slight flick- er of dubiousness toward the man who had come over on another boat. “The American army in France con- sists of exactly 1,427 men! And there isn’t a bean to feed ’em with! They iave nothing but tobacco! They were lumped out in the freezing mud up| near the front, without arms, ammu- iition, clothing or shelter; and, they’re lying of starvation and exposure at the rate of 100 a day! You can figure t for yourself, In 14 1-4 days—” And so it goes. Among the newly crrived in Paris, rumor madly fol- ows rumor, each more wild, more fap astic, more silly and absurd than th: one upon the heels of which it treads The trouble is sudden proximity Those fresh from across the ragin; sea approach Paris with the feelin; that now they’re in the midst of th viggest thing that ever happened fr the world; that hey expect big thing start seething the minute they a: vive. The big things don’t, and th: saris papers furnish very little excite ment. The daily news is usually print rd on one small sheet, about 16 inche: vy and there’s only room, on thc wo sides, for advertisements, pepper: etters from Old Su scriber, and th sold bare facts of army operations FUN ——-DANCE FOR THEIR LIVING Special Staff Correspondence New York, Feb. 24.—They are young and pretty, Playing billiards witr ben is just a lot of fun, although they among the best women pocket bil- ard players in th puntry. At other times they are dancing instructresse: at the Grand Central Palace, New York. But because they like to play bil lidrds Miss: Florence Flower is cham- pion woman pocket billiardist of New York and Mary oJhnson is next Des‘ ‘That was all decided at a tournament on Broadway in which Miss Flower defeated all contenders and Mary Johnson was defeated only, by Miss Flower. * Mis Flower.doesn’t care a whole lot about her title. “I like caroms much better than pocket billiards,” she said. “I intend ‘to take lessons in three cushion and balk line from Welker Cochran~ and Maurice Daly. Of.course if I am chal- lenged I will defehd my title.” . Mary ‘Johnson, who'is Mrs. Johnson if you please, would be a pretty dang- erous contender for any man. She frequently runs the 15 balls off the, table and has had high runs exceeding * 25, She shook her blonde head when questioned about instruction. “T just learned by myself,” she said, “I started playing about two years ago and just. picked up what I know myself. I have watched Alfredo De Oro and Welker Cochran play and have tried to copy their form.” Both Miss Flower and Mrs. John- son find billiards provides a recreation heir dancing. play ® little bil- tle she would not MADE WIM ee b just he official communications, these last, which we get back home, but without our picturesque amplifications by the festive war corespondent. The newly arrived American sees that paper, and says he: Aha! The censor! He is keeping back from me the lurid descriptions with which at home I sweetened my coffee! What élse is the censor withholding besides the gaudy details to which I am ac- customed, and to which I have an in- alienable right? Aba! Tt is then that lie falls a prey to the wild rumor and the hoarse whisper. These all emanate from one myster- fous source; and if the police ever \ucceed in locating him, they'll swing 4r, High Authority: from a lamppost, yr he is a German agent, either by ‘esign or accident. ‘He must be a wondrous creature, hig High Authority, whom no eye ‘ath seen, but whom every ear hath ward. He sits in some damp cellar, and es nothing but read -between the ‘mes until he is full of poison, where- apon he whets his stinger and sallies sorth. New Arrival. Beneath the new arrival’s tender skin he inserts his subtle virus, and ‘nstantly, violently, that new arival starts into ever widening circles, pop- syed and yelping. } When the new arrival becomes a seasoned dweller in Paris, when he| fas been here long enough to discover ‘o his amazement that the sun still rises in the east and sets in the west.) ind that night still succeeds tho day| in unfailing alternation, he is immune| from the virus of High Authority be- eause he has been stung before, and) is inocula! | } By this time, moreover, he has th great big idea about his war whic! he was all along trying to get, and that big idea turns out to be plain, in-} lividual duty! so he tells the boarse-! ly whispering confidant. of. High ‘Au- hority to go to hell, because he’s busy hustling potatoes out to the front ine,trenches!, ‘ ‘i ‘As for the Frenchman, he only | @ DIME “TO. — E%, Net - ofl YES, BUT THAT TOMATO shrugs shouldérs at the buz- zing of the rumor bug, He has no time for such feverish frivolity as the consideration of what might possibly happen next Friday, if something else, which never does, ‘migh possibly happen on thursday. He's been busy with this war for three and a half years, and he has re- duced its conduct to three cardinal principles. . FIRST, it is the duty of the soldier to go out and stand in thé spot as- signed to him, and, with the sanre sud: lime courage of thosé who have died for his cause and the cause of Fratce, which is the cause of civilization, fight until that sacred cause is accom- plished; SECOND, . it is the duty of the civilian, besides holding intact the economic and domestic institu- tions’ of the country, to send the sol- dier to the front, feed hi mthére, keep - him clothed, put:a gun in his hand, and supply that gun with endless bul- lets; THIRD, it is the duay of every purveyor of pessimism, every bearer of depressing tales which might awaken enthusiasm, every. disseminator of grotesquely terrifying may-be-sos or might-happens which would tend to in- terfere with’ steadfast purpose, évery rumor-mnoriger, in ‘fact, to hand himself over to the military authorities, and be shot for the traitor which he un- doubtedly it! It's. a grand: little idea, some to think it over for any nation which is sending its sons to the war. Crucifix Probably Cénturled Ord. An_old crucifix bearing the date 1734 was found by a man in Tyroné, Ire- land, the other day, whilé he. was en- gaged fn putting a new -fioor in. his kitehen to replace an earthen one. The crucifix, was .fownd | about: 15. inches pelow ‘the’ surface, emberlded fn the clay, and sippeared to have been carved out of a solld Klock of whtte oak. It was in a perfect stute of preservation, ‘ave that the right arm of the cros: was somewhat ‘decayed, ‘ Smrihe want adfbithe rewats.! —in every town to sell Tribunes. Boys, look! Here's YOUR chance. Wide awake boys are making as high as $5 a day selling the Bismarck Tribune. 4 | Write the Circulation Dept. _for further information “