Bemidji Daily Pioneer Newspaper, February 10, 1908, Page 2

H i ] i S TR S THE BEMIDJI DAILY PIONEER PUBLISHED MVERY AFTMRNOON, A A A A A A A A AN A A AN AR AP s OFFICIAL PAPER---CITY OF BEMIDII A A A A A A A A A A A A AN BEMIDJI PIONEER PUBLISHING CO. CLYDE J. PRYOR I A. G. RUTLEDGB Business Manager Managing Editor Wotered In the vostoffice at Bemidil. Minc., as second class matter. SUBSCRIPTION---$5.00 PER ANNUM THE COMIC VALENTINE. The comic valentine is enough to make St. Valentine wish he had never had a birthday. It affords a few people an opportunity to work off their grudges without resorting to such mild and gentle methods as putting broken glass in soup or sending infernal machines. We will suppose that sometime during the last year you had a fall- ing out with someone. Instead of genially coming up to you and hitting you on the nose or blacking one of your eyes, he may, for the small sum of 1 cent, send you a lurid picture, beneath which is a sentiment implying that you are utilizing a cold batter-cake for brains and that every time nature looks at you she shudders. If you are a young woman and have rejected a young man he may, instead of setting fire to the house where you live, send you a chase and elegant creation showing you asa shrewdish-faced woman and bearing a verse delicately hinting that your hair is false, your teeth ditto and that if prizes were distributed for homliness you would get them all. The man who sends comic valen- tines usually works off his ebu- lient humor at other times by play- ing practical jokes on his friends. He is the man who gives you a loaded cigar that may break your law, or merrily pushes you down a flight of stairs or puts a lot of tar where you can sit on it. But there is one consolation. Everyone who sends comic valen- tines has some acquaintance who sizes him up perfectly and sends him oue in return that simply shriv- els up his inmost soul. OBSERVATIONS. [By “Doc"] Usually it is the green youth who paints the town red. Most of us expect a lot of things we have no reason to expect. Mustard plasters also come under the head of drawing materials. A man has no right to stone his wife, but he may rock his baby. Pantaloons of a justice can hardly be termed breaches of the peace. Astronomers and theatrical man- agers are always looking out fora new star. Every day thousands of people exclain: “I can’t stand it!” But they do. There is usually one too many. The poorest one must go. Are you the" poorest one?” Every little while this fact is forced to a man’s attention: that a great deal goes on he never hears of until the explosion comes. Young Woman Held for Forgery. Chicago, Feb. 8.—HEstella Taylor, the young woman from Minneapolis who was recently arrested in Galesburg, 1L, on the charge of passing numer- ous forged checks in this clty, has been held in bonds of $1,500 to await the action of the grand jury. In the reliminary hearing it was contended hat she was insane. Cut In Wages Ordered. Denver, Feb. 8.—Notices were post- ed at the Globe smelter, owned by the American Smelting and Refining com- pany, announcing a reduction in wages comniencing Feb. 11. One of the com- pany’s smelters at Pueblo will also be shut down. The reduction affects 700 men and varies from 10 to 25 cents per day. Four Persons Burned to Death. Campbellton, N. B, Feb. 8—At Grand Cascapedia, z Quebec border town, the four members of the family of Andrew Campbell were burned to death by a fire which destroyed their home. Campbell returned from work to discover the ruins of his home, in which were the dead bodies of his father, wife and two children. Patients Saved With Difficuity. Grand Rapids, Mich., Feb. 8 —The Belding sanitarium at Belding, Mich., owned and orerated by Dr. A. B. Spin- ney, a large frame structure, has been burned. Eleven patlents were rescued after much difficulty by firemen. One woman from Cadillac, Mich., became insane from excitement. Stevenson as He Talked. He used to stand ou the hearth rugin the smoking room, says Walter Crane in his “An Artist's Reminiscences” of Robert Louis Stevenson, the center of an admiring clrele, and discourse very much in the same style as.that In which he wrote. It ve one the im- pression of artificiality rather—I mean his manner ot spe ng aud choice of words, as if carefully selected and cul- tivated. 1f a remark was offered by one of the company he would perhaps aceept it and turn about, much as a conjurer does when bLe borrows a hand- kerchief or a hat from some one in his audience; or perhaps he would work it into his next sentence, returning it to his interlocutor improved—wrapped in silver paper, metaphorically speaking. His personal appearance was quite as nnusual as his speech—a long, pale, thin face and lank hair, quick and pen- etrating eyes and a rather sardonic smile. The world in general, especial- Iy in clubland, wore white shirts and collars as a rule, but Stevenson sported black ones. A Queer Ad. “An Italian with a piano organ was turning the handle of his machine rap- idly, but not a note was to be heard. I stopped at once. What on earth could be the matter?” The speaker, an advertising agent, smiled. “Finally,” he said, “I went up close to the man. “‘A breakdown? I asked. “He pointed to a small placard on the organ’s front, and I read: “‘The Interior of the instrument has been removed. The relief that in con- sequence you experience is as nothing compared with that which immediate- ly follows a dose of Sure Cure Cough Mixture. “It was an original ad.,” the expert ended, “and I followed it up. From what the Sure Cure people told me, 1 found that the same ingenuity ana money put In legitimate newspaper advertising would have brought 50 per cent more returns.” —New Orleans Times-Democrat. A Lion Tamer's Secret. The boarhound growled, and the great yellow lion leaped back in fear. “The lion could kill the hound,” the trainer said, “but he doesn’t think so. He thinks the hound could easily kill him.” “Why?” “When the lion was a cub this boar- hound, full grown, lived in the cage with him. The big dog could, of course, lick the little cub, and the cub therefore feared and respected him. Now the cub is grown up, but he stifl thinks the hound is the better. We¢ rear a cub with a full grown hound in this way for a reason. The hound is * protection to us trainers afterward ‘when the cub is grown, for then should he become rambunctious one look from the dog will send him, subdued and ashamed, slinking off to the cage'’s far- thest corner.”—Philadelphia Bulletin. The Story of Zero. The word “zero” is from the Spanish and means “empty,” hence nothing. It was first used for a thermometer in 1795 by a Prussian named Fahrenheit. By experimenting with snow and salt Fahrenheit found that he could pro- duce a degree of cold equal to that of the coldest winter day. It happened that the day on which he made his final experiment was the coldest that anybody could remember, and, struck with the coincidence of his scientific discovery, he hastily concluded that he had found the lowest degree of tem- perature, either natural or artificial. He called the degree “zero” and con- structed a thermometer graduating up from zero to boiling point, which he numbered 212 and the freezing point 82, One of Three Things. Fred Jones, a man of no small dl- mensions, was a popular conductor on the Boston and Maine railroad, making daily trips between Boston and Plym- outh. One day several years ago while collecting fares he encountered a man under the influence of liquor who would not show a ticket. After reason- ing In valn with this passenger Mr. Jones sald, “Now, see here, you'll have to do one of three things—give me a ticket, pay your fare or get off and walk.” “You’ve (hic) got to do one of three things,” was the reply—‘“eat less (hic), hoop yerself (hic) or bust.” His Nerve. Speaking of a Wall street operator,® broker said: “The man’s nerve Is ame ing. It shocks me. It reminds me of money lender to whom a friend .o mine, a great rider to hounds, once re- sorted. “‘Yes,” said the money lender to my embarrassed friend, ‘I will renew your note, but only on one condition, sir— namely, that during the next paper chase at Lenox you scatter from your bag these 5,000 pink slips bearing my name and the words, “Money advanced on ecasy terms.” Is it a go, sir?” The Alternative. A Frenchman applied to a local offi- clal for a passport to visit Klatter- ‘wingschen, in Switzerland. The func- tlonary, who was not a fellow of any geographical soclety, studied in vain with the spelling of the place’s name. Then, unwilling to confess his difficul- ty, he blandly asked, “Would you as llef visit some other town?’ Hopeful Gleam. Mrs. Becky—Dear, oh, dear, my cold’s getting worse and worse! I'm getting 80 I can’t talk. I wonder what I'd better do? - Mr. Becky (absently)—For goodness’ sake, don’t do anything!— Cleveland Leader. Some men dress quletly and others lose thelr collar buttons.—Dallas News. A Criterion. “What is a synonym?”’ asked a teach- er. “Please, sir,” said the lad, “it's a word you can use in place of another i you don’t know how to spell the oth- or one.—School Board Journal. Used Up. Digby—How long did it take you to learn to run a motor car? Bkorcher— Oh, five or six. Digby—Five or six what—weeks? Skorcher — No; motor ears.—Catholic Standard and Times. Directing Folks In Boston. The stranger hadl been searching nearly half an hour among the mys. terious curving ways of the park for Fenway street. At last the trim figure of a hurrying student attracted her eye, and she resolved to ask for the necessary information, “Can you tell me, please, where Fen- way street is?” she asked. “Yes, indeed,” answered the student. “Why, we're in it now.” “Yes?” The stranger looked rather helplessly around at the wealth of shrubbery, the smooth roads that seemed to lead only to Mrs, Gardner's green roofed palace. “But 1 wanted to find a certain number on Fenway street.” “Oh!” said the student, a helpless ex- pression for a moment clouding her face. “Do you know, there’s a street down there.” She pointed a daintily gloved hand straight into a clump of elms. “I don’t know the name of it. I never did know that it had a name. Why don’t you try that one?’—Boston Her- ald. Pretty Strong Lungs. In “Through Luzon on Highways and Byways” the author, a naval offi- cer, tells this expansive story. We vouch for the story only, not for the facts: ‘While traversing this attractive coun- try, which offers so much to tempt the husbandman, we met with no sign of life untll nearing a village, where could be seen native hunters after deer and carabao. The carabao furnishes a fine quality of meat and has a peculiar, instinctive trait in being the only deni- zen of the forest that can protect it- self against the boa constrictors, which are somewhat numerous in these parts. ‘When the carabao is pounced upon by the boa and the reptile has wrapped itself round the body for the squeezing, process of killing the animal, the cara- bao slowly draws in its sides until the boa has his grip fixed securely and begins to tighten up, when suddenly the carabao inflates his lungs to thei fullest and spreads his sides, tearing the vertebrae of the reptile into a thou- sand pieces. How Tea Lead Is Made. Tea lead for lining tea chests is su- perior at least from the standpoint ot cheapuess to any other metal. Accord- ing to an article in the Brass World, the method practiced by the Chinese in the manufacture of tea lead is to press wolten lead between two flat stones. The excess of lead is melted in an iron kettle by a direct fire underneath. Rice paper is carefully smoothed down over the surface of the stones to supply a nonconductor of heat and thus pre- vent the chilling of the lead. The stones are now placed flat upon the ground and the upper one raised a short distance, with one edge resting upon the lower stone. In other words, the stones are opened like a book. A ladle full of melted lead is now poured in between the stones, and the top one is quickly dropped. The lead is squeez- ed out until only a thin layer is left. Tea lead usually runs from .005 to .10 inch in thickness. An Untamed Marquis. The father of the Marquis of Bute had an amusing experience in. the neighborhood of Rothesay. He met a cockney traveler who asked to be di- |- rected to a certain place. Deceived by the marquis’ accent, the visitor took him for a southron and took occasion to make supercilious remarks about the barbarous islanders of Bute. He said, “Blime me, I suppose you're like me, an Englishman?”’ “No,” responded the marquis; “I”m a native of Bute, this island.” “Good gracious!” exclaimed the Lon- doner, in amazement. “Then who in the dooce tamed yer?” Lord Bute assumed a flerce expres- sion and, raising a ponderous cudgel he was carrying, said angrily, “Who says I'm tame?’ The alarmed cock- ney turned and fled.—Pall Mall Gazette. Two Cures For the Blues. “What do you do when you have the blues?” asked the first woman. “I walk up Fifth avenue and look in all the jewelers’ windows and at the orchids and high priced hats. What do you do?’ “I go way down to Rivington street and look at the wretched poor women with seventeen children struggling in the dirt. That makes me thankful my affairs are no worse.” — New York Press. Its Worth. The actress, having been arrested for running her automobile seventy miles an hour, was describing the superb car to a reporter. The young man inquired: “How much did you say it was worth ?” “At least two columns on the front page,” she answered absently.—Kan- sas City Independent. Shut Her Off. First Deaf Mute (making signs)— Did your wife complain because you stayed out till after midnight? Second Deaf Mute (chuckling)—Did she? You should have seen her!” But when it began to get monotonous I just turned out the light. : A Two Questions. “Why don’t we see men like the nov- | elists describe?” “I give it up. Why don’'t we see girls like the illustrators draw?’'— Louisville Courier-Journal. % Followed the Lead. Teacher—Where do we obtain coal, Freddie? Freddie—From the coal beds. miss. Teacher—Right! Now, Jimmy, where do we obtain feathers? Jimmy— From feather beds, mis f Well Occupied In Either Case. It is beautiful to see a young girl start out with the avowed intention of devoting her life to teaching school, | and yet few people blame her seriously when she quits to get married.—Tomb- stone Epitaph. A Hypocrite. Teacher (after explaining the charac- ter of the Pharisee)~And now what do we mean by a “hypocrite?’ Pupil— Please, mnfss, a man wot says he is wot be isn’t, but he ain’t--Puuch. Bl S i35 A Little Too Far. “There is such a thing as overdoing your part,” declared a man of the law who now has the knowledge gained by much experience, “Shortly after I began practice tu the west 1 was called upon to defend & man who had drawn a revolver on another and threatened to kill him. The accused did not have a character above reproach, but the prosecuting witness was also shady in reputation, and T made the most of this fact. T pletured him as a desperado of the most dangerous type, a man that was a constant menace to the community and one who would recognize no other law than that of force. Such men as he, I insisted, mnade necessary the or- ganization of vigilance committees and injured the fair name of the west among the older communities of the country. “The jury returned a verdict of guil- 1y and my man was sentenced to a year’s imprisonment. As soon as court adjourned the foreman of the jury came to me and said: ‘Young feller, you spread it on too thick. After that there rip snortin’ speech of yourn we couldn’t do nothin’ else 'an what we done.’ “‘ don’t understand you, sir. “‘You don't? Why, we found the durned gerloot guilty ’cause he didn’t shoot.’ "—Detroit Free Press. Ballet Shoes. Ballet shoes fit like a stocking. They are of leather, with a thin leather sole about an inch wide and with the up- pers sewed so that they come under the foot. The ballet dancer wants no rubber heels, instep arch supports nor any other of the foot supporting or reforming devices which are common- ly used by ordinary mortals. The toe dancer desires a hard box toe oa her ballet shoes, but the ordinary dancer seeks only shoes that will give perfect freedom of movement of the joints and muscles of the feet. It is & rule of good damcers, a shoe man of experi- ence says, to wear shoes that will al- low for space between the toes. It is a point of good fit that all persons should heed, he says. High heels are put on to stage shoes for efféct, not to promote good dancing. Muny stage shoes are made with short fore parts and high heels to make the feet look smaller and the person taller.—Boston Globe. What Did He Mean? Mike Maloney’s wife was an invalld, and the doctor had been doing all sorts of things for her, chenging the medlicine so often that poor Mike's in- come would scarcely reach and make both ends meet, and at last fhe doctor sald that his wife must go to a warm- er climate. Mike listened fo that advice for sev- eral months, and finally when October came the doctor told Mike one Satur- day evening after all of his week’s wages had been spent that his wife positively must. be sent “to a warmer climate without delay.” Mike left the room for a few min- utes, and when he returned he was wiping his eyes with his left hand, while with his right hand he brought an ax, which he gave to the physician, saying: “I hate to do’it, doc. You please do 1t for me.”—Kansas Clty Independ- ent.. Practical Help For Deafness. T have proved that this is really prac- tical. 5 Get a common pasteboard malling tube such as pictures or music is mail- ed in and hold it to the ear closely. The result is wonderful. A very deaf person can hear distinctly everything that is said by any one sitting on the other side of the room. At first thought one is inclined to ridicule so simple a method. T bought a good long ome, large enough to fit over the ear, for 10 cents. One can get them at any business stationer’s. I tried it on grandmother, who is very deaf. She could hear well and, what was more remarkable, could also hear with her very deaf ear, with which she has not heard a sound for seven years. Try it! That's all I have to say.—Harper's Bazar. « WHEN HER BACK AGHES A Woman Finds All Her Energyand Ambition Slipping Away. Bemidji women know how the aches and pains that come when the kidneys f5il make life a bur- den. Backache, hip pains, head- aches, dizzy spells, distressing urinary troubles, all tell of sick kidneys and waro you of the stealthy approach of diabetes, dropsy and Bright's disease, Doan’s Kidney - Pills permanently cure all these disorders. Here’s proof of it in a Bemidji woman’s words: ° Wrs. Edward Jewett, living at 1112 Park Ave,, Bemidji, Minn,, says: “I am recommendin"g Doan’s Kidney Pills and from my actual experience I know them to be a'reliable remedy. I did not take them as carefully as I might have, but still the results received were satisfactory. The attacks always came on with a dull ache in'my back, and while they were at their height I felt weak and miserable. 1 sent to The Owl Drug Store and procured a box of Doan’s’ Kidney' Pills, = They helped. me right away and Iam well pleased with the results re- ceived. Faor sale by all. dealers, Price 50 cents. Foster-Milburn Co,, Buffalo, N. Y., sole agents for the United States, Remember the name—Doan’s— and take no.other, The Shoulder Strap. i If it were possible to compile such data it would be extremely interesting to know to what extent women have influenced the uniforms and equip- ment of their fighting states. A little instance in point is the steel curk shoulder strap of the British cavalry. When Sir George Luck was setting out for Kandahar during the Afghan operations Lady Luck, knowing prob- ably something of the fighting methods of the tribesmen, whose four foot knife can cut clean from shoulder to belt, sewed a couple of steel curb chains under each of the shoulder straps on her husband’s tunic. As a protection from sword cuts these proved so ef- fective that at the end of the campaign Bir. George made a report in relation thereto, with the result that they were adopted as a permanent feature of the cavalry uniform.—Harper's Weekly. Seized Her Opportunity. He was not u very rapld wooer, and she was getting a bit anxious. Again he called, and they sat togeth- er in the parlor, “just those two.” A loud rap came at the front door. “Oh, bother!” she said. “Who can be calling?” 5 “Say you’re out,” said the deceiver. “Oh, no; that would be untrue,” mur- mured the ingenuous one. “Then say you're engaged,” he urged. “Oh, may I, Charlie?” she cried as she threw herself in his arms. And the man kept on knocking at the front door.—Illustrated Bits. American Woman In German Eyes. American girls, whether born or merely brought up in America, evi- dence the same independence of judg- ment and the same complete self re- Hance. It is hard to.say whether this is the result of the education in the public schools and colleges or in their freedom from that condition of legal and social subserviency to which the gentler sex {8 doomed in older coun- trles.—Max von Brandt in Berlin Deutsche Revue. Quite a “Character.” Here is a “character” given to a servant on leaving her last situation: “The bearer has been in my house a Year, less eleven months. During this time she has shown herself diligent at the house door, frugal in work, mind- ful of herself, prompt in excuses and honest when everything was out of the way.”—London Tit-Bits. Awed Into Humility. Man for man, if not woman for ‘woman, the humility and terror of Amerfcans in the presence of Eng- lish people of their own class or above it is, with whatever care dis- gulsed, a pathetic thing.—London Out- look. But Hard to Tell. “What is the real, essential differ- ence between mushrooms and toad- stools?” “Exactly the difference between a feast and a funeral.”—Baltimore Amer- lcan, A blithe heart makes a blooming vis- age—Irish Proverb, TO CURE ‘A COLD IN ONE DAY. Te LAXATIVE BROMO Qu inine Tablets Duslvrlsts refund money it it fails to cure ;ESC . GROVE'S signature is on each box 1 We Printing The Pioneer Printery Is Equipped with tModern Machinery, Up-to-date Type Faces, and the Largest Stock of Flat Papers, Ruled Goods and Stationery of All Kirds in Northern Minnesota. in. Beltrami county, and in Commercial Printing. Try us; we'll Suit you. : s Pioneer You want a remedy that will not only give quick relief but effect a permanent cure. You want a remedy that will re- lieve the lungs and keep expectora- tion easy. ' You want a remedy that will coun- teract any tendency toward pneu- monia. You want a remedy that is pleas- ant and safe to take. Chamberlain’s Cough Remedy meets all of these requirements, and for the speedy and permanent cure of bad colds stands without a peer. A Severe Cold Quickly Cured by Cham- berlain’s Cough Remedy. ‘‘Last winter I caughta very severe cold which lingered for weeks,”” says J. Ur- quhbart, of Zephyr, Ontario. ‘‘My cough ‘was very dry and harsh. The local dealer recommended Chamberlain’s Cough Rem- edy and guaranteed it, so I gaveita trial, One small bottle of it cured me. Ibelieve Chamberlain’s Cough Remedy to be the best I have ever used.’” SORE THROAT, DITLURSZA, Ixcspizxr Consumrrion soscasssor s il THROAT and LUNGS. Reduced Fac-simile, tis Equaily Valuable for Children It Contains no Narcotic and is Safe and Sure Ask your Druggist forit. Barker’s Drug Store - CARTER @ TAIT Real Estate and Fire Insurance A FEW CHOICE PROPERTIES FOR SALE AT BARGAIN PRICES 607 Irvine Ave. House and lot; 6 rooms, finely finished; lot 50 by 140 to 20 ft. alley. Price $1600, easy terms. 10 room house, finest location on Lake Boulevard. - A snap for $2,000, half cash, Two large dwellings on Bemidji Ave. $1600 and $1900 Business lot, Minnesota Ave. Price $475. We write fire and plate Money to loan on farm glass insurance lands have] the highest-salaried Printers we are leaders Printery A RO, Gl